WWE Velocity Tapings (to air 8/2): Matt Hardy defeated Brian "Spanky" Kendrick
The Basham Brothers & Sean O'Haire defeated The APA & Funaki
Ultimo Dragon defeated Nunzio
WWE SmackDown Tapings:
Kurt Angle comes to the ring and cuts a promo about how he is the new WWE Champion four months after his neck surgery. Brock Lesnar interrupts and challenges Angle to a re-match. Angle accepts but Vince McMahon comes out and claims Angle does not want a re-match and calls him a backstabber. McMahon says no re-match until Brock earns it. Vince says Lesnar will earn that tonight as he teams with Kurt Angle against two opponents of his choosing.
Rey Mysterio w/ Billy Kidman defeated Shelton Benjamin w/ Charlie Haas
First segment involving Torrie Wilson and Jamie Noble. Torrie gets to the room. Jamie Noble is waiting in the room in his underwear in a cowboy hat. Shows off some sex toys to Torrie and she starts to get sick.
Chris Benoit defeated Doink the Clown - Before the match, Rhyno cut a promo backstage saying he needs a warm-up before he can face him. After the match, Rhyno says he isn't coming to the ring and calls Benoit a joke.
Second segment involving Torrie Wilson and Jamie Noble. Nidia joins the fun and her and Noble go at it while Torrie looks on disgusted. I guess they were "doing it" in many numerous positions that made Torrie disgusted.
Backstage promo between Kurt Angle and Brock Lesnar.
Eddie Guerrero defeated Tajiri to retain the WWE United States Championship - Tajiri came out of the trunk of Eddie's low rider and gave Eddie the green mist to the face. Guerrero tries to get out of the match but the referee warns Guerrero to wrestle or forfeit the title. Guerrero eventually gets the win to retain the belt.
Shannon Moore w/ Matt Hardy defeated Zach Gowen - After the match, Matt Hardy beat on Gowen and got a McMahon type "ASSHOLE" chant from the crowd.
John Cena defeated Orlando Jordan - Before the match started, Cena challenged The Undertaker to a match next week on SmackDown.
Third segment involving Torrie Wilson and Jamie Noble. Nidia and Jamie Noble get out of the shower and say it will now turn into a threesome. Someone knocks on the door and it turns out to be Billy Gunn. Noble backs up and says he hasn't layed a finger on Torrie tonight and he pleaded with him not to hit him. Gunn asks Torrie if she is okay and she says yes. Nidia and Noble start going at it again in the background. Gunn and Torrie look in surprise.
Backstage, Brock Lesnar comes into Vince McMahon's office and challenges Vince for a match next week on SmackDown. Vince said he will take it into consideration.
Fourth segment involving Torrie Wilson and Jamie Noble. They open the video with all four people (Gunn, Torrie, Nidia and Noble) all in bed together, looking like they all just had sex. Yes, it ended that way. Said to be very funny.
Sable came to the ring. She cut a promo about how she is the dominant female on SmackDown since she defeated Stephanie McMahon at Vengeance. Sable then introduces the mystery opponents for Kurt Angle & Brock Lesnar tonight. Big Show and A-Train come out as the mystery tag team. Kurt Angle and Brock Lesnar are then introduced.
Kurt Angle & Brock Lesnar defeated A-Train & Big Show - The match ended when Lesnar hit Big Show with the F-5 but Angle tagged himself in to get the pin on Big Show for the win. After the match, Lesnar looks at Angle like "what the hell just happened?" Lesnar gives Angle an F-5. Vince McMahon comes out and says he accepts Lesnar's challenge for next week but it will come with a stipulation. Vince says the match will be in a 15 foot high Steel Cage.
--------------- So Matt Hardy got pushed to Velocity, even though he is seen on Smackdown I would rather of had him wrestle on SD than Moore. And now its Lesner vs McMahon in a Steel Cage? To me it seems, after the F5, that Angle will interfear and help McMahon. The Noble/Nidia/Torrie/Gunn stuff sounds like it is going to suck.
(edited by XPacArmy on 30.7.03 0212) Homer: I want to set the record straight: I thought the cop was a prostitute.
Originally posted by XPacArmyChris Benoit defeated Doink the Clown
OMEGA must be proud! Who says WWE doesn't read the Wienerboard?
I love the idea of a Zach Gowan/Matt Hardy feud! Matt's going to have a lot of material to work with in his promos for the next few weeks and Zach will continue to play the underdog role to perfection. Now we'll get a chance to see Zach put on a GOOD match and not just sell for a senile old man.
And speaking of senile old men, why is Vince on THIS show too? I can't stand seeing Vince on my TV twice a week. The only thing worse is the fact that Big Slug main events AGAIN and this time he brought Albert-Train with him.
But next week's cage match is looking like a heel turn waiting to happen. Set your phasers to "swerve".
Until we see how the Gunn/Knoble/Torrie/Nidia thing plays out on TV, it's hard to say, but if it ends with them all in bed and the bad blood put aside, I had an idea that might just freshen things up.
Gunn is motivated, but he's really not gonna get anywhere as a midcard face. Knoble's outgrown the Cruiser division, but isn't really credible enough past the midcard. But this little sexcapade could bring them together as a tag team that might actually work.
Think about it: Billy and Jamie bond from their sexual exploits. Torrie feels disgusted and goes to her real love, Kidman, for comfort. Meanwhile, Knoble and Gunn become friends and continue using nympho Nidia for both their pleasures. It's a 2003 version of the New Age Outlaws. Don't give them that name, but bring back that attitude.
"Trailer Trash" and "Bad Ass"...
If Torrie runs to Kidman, Haas and Benjamin job the titles to Kidman/Rey instead of the break up (hold off longer), you can get an instant tag title fued with a fresh heel team.
Man, fantasy booking sucks. Gets our hopes up too high.
"... opportunity has knocked. Well, it's not knockin' fast enough, so we're kickin' the damn door in. So what we're gonna do, we're gonna give your children a hero to look up to - we're gonna give your boyfriends, your husbands an excuse to get into the gym. And we're gonna give you ladies a fantasy to go home to every Monday night." - Mike Sanders, 8/21/00
Considering they had him jobbing to Shannon Moore and then taking the post match beating by Matt Hardy, perhaps this is a sign that Peg Legged is being sent out the door. From a PPV match with Vince down to jobbing to Shannon Moore in 48 hours has to be some sort of record for dropping down the card. I guess Billy was the one who got to keep the gravy boat. Just when you thing A-Train is back in Velocity land, he gets put back into SD main events. Any show where Eddy, Kurt and Benoit have matches automatically ends up on the positive side.
Will the woman who left her nine infants at Shea Stadium, please pick them up. They already scored six in the first off Tom Glavine, and know more letters of the alphabet than John Franco.
Yeah, sounds like a good show this week. But look, if Vince has business with Kane, then he should just try on be on the show that Kane's on, instead of both just because he owns the place. Whatever. But the rest looks good, but Velocity looks even better! Me thinks I'll catch that myself. I don't really care what happens with Torrie as long as Nidia and Noble made up! Yay!
I'm still pining for O' Haire to get thee to Raw, but until then, him hanging with the S&M duo sounds very interesting, especially after I suggested on this board that he might be the type who gets into that stuff. Do I call 'em or what?
Benoit v. Doink?! Who booked that crap? Wait, don't tell me, Dink, right? Or is it Wink and Pink? Finally, I think we can all agree that if the last year and a half hasn't proved it, last night officially confirmed that Torrie is the biggest slut in the WWE, if not Mr. Ass (I know, my jaw's on the floor too). I got this from the spoilers..
There was a *GREAT* move by Matt on Spanky that started out as a Razor's Edge but ended up as a powerbomb
Matt Hardy busted out the Splash Mountain on Velocity! If you don't know what that is, it's a move that sets up the opponent in a Razor's Edge, then drops him in a powerbomb. Dynamite Kansai (who was once in AJW, but is now in GAEA Japan) uses that move as her finisher. Straight out of Japan and onto Velocity, I'm there!
(edited by Ringmistress on 30.7.03 0736) 1100 bitches and counting....
sounds like a good Smackdown! looks like thier setting up a swerve for next week. lesnar probably goes heel but wouldnt be surprised if it was Angle either. Steel cage should mean big ratings for Smackdown that week. Lets hope Gunn & Noble dont have sex on TV! anyways it looks as if Cena & Undertaker are going to continue their fued @ Summerslam. I think this could be very good. Everyone bitched when Cena lost to UT but if they continue their fued and Cena gets the win at Summerslam isn't it better than if Cena won at Vengeance only to have Undertaker win @ Summerslam. I think this is still going to turn out with Cena on top and headed toward the top of the card. WWE is not going to give up on Cena. They are just going to build him slowly and I think it will pay off. the guy is young and has years to make it to the top. He is filled ith charisma and along with Lesnar & Orton will lead the WWE back to sold out arenas and high buy rates and ratings.
Originally posted by tomvejadaUltimo on Velocity? Darn.
Tsk, Tsk. Sounds like someone still has high expectations.
The Noble/Torrie/Nidia/Gunn stuff reads as being outrageously stupid to me. We'll see how it comes off when it airs.
Having 'em, uh, kiss and make up sounds a damsite better than an extended Gunn/Noble feud to me.
"I do have a degree in electrical engineering... from almost 20 years ago. Punchcard systems were just becoming obsolete, we had rotary phones in the dorms, and a modem was still a gizmo the size of a shoebox into which you squooshed the phone receiver itself. In short, we lived like animals.
The instant obsolesence is why I became a writer. The rate of punctuation in a sentence doesn't double every 18 friggin' months, and you never have some 22-year-old looming over your shoulder, shaking his head, saying "dude... you're still using adverbs...?"
Dave Bautista (I guess)... well, he got his last name. They could have just called him "Dave". His gimmick would be spending half of his promo time telling the fans how great the next issue of his newsletter is.