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The W - Pro Wrestling - WWE RAW #1 thread (Page 2)
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Swordsman Yen
Frankfurter








Since: 16.2.02
From: Shaolin

Since last post: 3938 days
Last activity: 3921 days
#21 Posted on | Instant Rating: 10.00
Thoughts on Raw...

- I would rather not call Vince's company anything than call it by that stupid name. They might as well have renamed it WCW with the way things are these days.

- Kill the hardcore title now! It's the "Oh my God! They killed Kenny!" of wrestling: a recurring joke that ran its course a long time ago.

- The Booker/Goldust segment would've been a perfect opportunity to cast a turban-clad Tiger Ali Singh (is he still around?) as the 7-11 manager, just to hear him yell at Booker "HEY COME BACK HERE! YOU DID NOT PAY FOR THAT SLURPEE!"

- Does The Undertaker not have pockets? Why didn't he just take his key with him? In fact, he rides his damn bike everywhere, why didn't he just ride it to wherever he wanted to go instead of leaving it with a backstage lackey?

- Hogan is the king of unintentional comedy. How UT was able to keep his composure through Hogan's false starts with the bike is amazing. With Hogan driving around backstage at 5 mph yelling and cursing, he couldn't have looked more senior citizen if his pants went up to his armpits.

- Sweet spot of the week: Swanton/5-Star combo. Honorable mention goes to Trish for taking a face first bump to the mat and going through the table without protection. Gutsy girl!

- Sorry, Terri. Malnourished bodies really don't do anything for me.

- "THE HARDYS MADE BROCK LESNAR! PLANET STASIAK MADE BROCK LESNAR! PLANET STASIAK MADE BROCK LESNAR! PLANET STASIAK MADE BROCK LESNAR!"

- Jerry Lawler seriously needs to get some p***y.

- Well, the nWo loses one senior citizen, but gains another.

- So did Nash show up just to make a pit stop? Thanks for coming out tonight, Kev!

- Coming soon: D'Lo bobble heads.



"Say 'what' again. SAY 'WHAT' AGAIN! I dare you, I double dare you, motherf--ker! Say 'what' one more goddamn time!" -- Samuel L. Jackson, Pulp Fiction (1994)

"I tell you what, why don't you say 'what' if you like to sleep with your own sister." -- Undertaker, 4/1/02 RAW, putting an annoying fad in its place
CxMorgado
Boudin rouge








Since: 21.1.02
From: Boston MA is the rippen'ist town...

Since last post: 304 days
Last activity: 5 hours
#22 Posted on

    Originally posted by Swordsman Yen
    Hogan is the king of unintentional comedy. How UT was able to keep his composure through Hogan's false starts with the bike is amazing.


The look on Taker's face when the motorcycle was stalling was perfect. It had "you did not just stall my bike you bastard" written all over it... it was written on top of laughter I'm sure, but still... great look.





"Wanna see how far I can go. Test my patience, see what I know.
Just not happy with nothing to do. Getting bold when there's more than two."
- Cro-mags.
Dr Unlikely
Frankfurter








Since: 2.1.02

Since last post: 2 days
Last activity: 13 hours
AIM:  
#23 Posted on
Oh, man, this was one of the funniest Raw installments since Kane debuted his Deadly Mystical Lightning and used it to set stagehands on fire. This is up there with the Deadly Mystical Lightning and the wideshot of Rock throwing Austin off the bridge for sustained laughter moments I've had watching wrestling in the past few years.

A few months ago, there was a thread started by someone, asking what people liked about Hogan and what he brought to the table and my only defense was brought to the fore tonight - Hogan is FUNNY. No one can bring The Funny like Hogan can, intentional or not. Not intentionally, like Steve Austin at the top of his game when he was stalking Bret and the Hart Foundation. Not unintentional, like Sid talking. Hogan stalling on the ramp and breaking out "bitch!" dramatically (not as funny as "I'll kick your...butt!", I'll admit) and putting around in the slow motion motorcycle chase in the back and spotting the rig and just sitting in it for the whole commercial break - that was awesome. And then UT almost crying for his beloved Titan bike to top it off? If only he'd been able to cradle it in his arms and look up at an overheard camera to scream "HOOOOOOOOOGAAAAAAAAAAAAN!"

Goldust's elaborate disguise was overshadowed by all that, but it was still pretty damn funny. I thought the weiner bit was overkill and it would have been just as funny if he was willing to forgive Booker jumping him last week if he could just have a sip of the Slurpee. These two should be on SmackDown - they'd be crazy over as tag champs and you could have Billy, Chuck and Rico express sympathy for Booker getting stuck with that weird Goldust. Black Gold and Texas T, man.

To echo what others have said, the monkey flip at the start and the Swanton/Five Star Frogsplash combo at the end of the tag match were really cool. I thought Big Show's huge backdrop on Austin was pretty amazing, too, especially considering Austin's neck. Really, I think Austin got a lot out of Big Show in that match and I'd actually like to see a Big Show/Austin singles match because I think they could make it work with Austin being able to brawl and sell Big Show's power and doing things like the Super Thesz Press he had to go to to take Big Show down. And I appreciate them actually having Show explain his turn, even though it should have been done a week ago.

Regal/D-Lo was a feud I said I wanted to see not long ago, so that's cool. They probably should have had Ross or Lawler speculate that D-Lo got involved because of the European Champion thing, rather than have it seem out of nowhere. They'll have to work hard to make the Euro title worth something after the two joke switches it's had in the Spike/Regal non-feud, but D-Lo looks like he's in great shape (I didn't think he looked that thin on his Heat appearances) and Regal making fun of the headbob and D-Lo's name should make for good promos.

They really seemed to blow things huge at least three times, though. First, and maybe most disturbing, was Brock seemingly having zero heat. I hope someone here went to the show and can confirm whether it was bad sound or what, but that was a dead crowd except for the Goldberg chants. They should have expected this - he's feuding with Stasiak, he's not allowed to talk and all we know about him is that Paul Heyman likes to talk about himself and met Lesnar somewhere. They need to get him a feud.

Then there was Buh Buh, who got a huge crowd reaction when he came out. Didn't expect that. But by the end, after doing the title-go-round once again, the crowd's reaction kept diminishing. It kind of came back up when he picked Trish up at the end, but when he was getting out of the ring, the place went dead silent. As others have said, Trish's slam through the table was pretty wild and Crash's bit was actually really funny, and I'm not normally a fan of his.

The biggest thing of the night, though, was the Flair turn. I really hoped they wouldn't do it this way, as they had a chance to do something different by having Flair not be out to get Austin, but Austin's paranoia forcing Flair into a situation he couldn't get out of. Now we have two evil owners on two evil brands and both live just to destroy Austin. Why are they split, again? I don't think it was an accident that Hall's promise for a surprise was almost a direct echo of Bischoff's "surprise that will change wrestling" and I think they wanted us to believe that Goldberg was going to be there, especially with the limo. Flair doing the whole mask and hat thing and calling out the nWo and Nash in the limo were all things that make no sense with Flair trying to fool Austin and Bradshaw, especially the Nash part, since they were played more for the fans benefit than Austin or Bradshaw. WCW used to do goofy things like that all the time.

I'm thinking Arn, who's been drawn along by Flair, gets pissed next week and that's the catalyst for the rumored Benoit-to-Raw trade that's been floating around, setting up Austin/Arn/Benoit/Bradshaw against the nWo. Hell, add Kane and Nash to their respective sides and you have yourself Teams of Five Striving To Survive.

So anyway, good show? God no. But with all the crazy shit(and some intentionally good things like "elaborate disguise" and the Swanton/Five Star finish) going on thrown on top of the ridiculous WWE/World Wrestling Entertainment nonsense (complete with JR blowing it first time out of the gate - also hilarious), it was a blast.
dunkndollaz
Banger








Since: 3.1.02
From: Northern NJ

Since last post: 3 days
Last activity: 17 hours
#24 Posted on
Sounds like I didn't miss all that much by watching the Hockey games last night.....



Stylin' and Profilin' - Custom Made from Head to Toe.....courtesy of Michael's of Kansas City
Divakind
Mettwurst








Since: 19.2.02
From: Charleston, WV

Since last post: 2496 days
Last activity: 2435 days
#25 Posted on
Is it really necessary to make the Hardcore match the "curtain jerk" of RAW just about every damn week? (Not all of us are able to be parked in front of our TV at 9:00!)

And does EVERY Hardcore match have to turn into a Mongolian clusterf**k? Every once in a while is fine (and fun to watch if the participants are creative about it), but when it turns into "take the belt down and pass it around",that's not exactly doing much in the "elevating the division" department.

"If you let me have a sip of your Slurpee, I'll let you have a bite of my weiner." I just about hurt myself on that one!! I said it last week, I'll say it again, no matter how bad the wrestling might be in the Booker/Golddust feud, the promos are golden!

RVD & Jeff Hardy. Now THERE'S a tag team I could live with for a while! That senton/five star finish was a thing of beauty. Pair those two up and put Matt on the last train to jobberville!

The whole Hogan/Taker bike segment? Obviously, the writers haven't fully grasped the expression "brevity is the soul of wit".

Molly vs. Terri in a swimsuit match. Yawn.......

Flair's heel turn? Big 'ol "duh!"





"I'm overflowing with the juices of life!"

--Evan Dorkin/Welcome to Eltingville
The Big Kat
Kishke








Since: 11.1.02
From: Austin, TX

Since last post: 461 days
Last activity: 21 hours
#26 Posted on
Another Austin/ owner feud. The writers obviously can't write for a face owner, so they turn Flair as quick as they can. Yeesh.

I was dying laughing when Hogan couldn't get the bike started. I could just imagine him when they panned to JR and the King for what seemed like 5 minutes, that he was walking the motorcycle up the ramp. I really wish I had been there.

Molly-put some pants back on. She is really chunky.

RVD and Jeff Hardy teamed up together pretty well. I really wish that the tag champs could go back and forth between shows, so there could be a good reason for tag teams on Raw. Otherwise it's just hey these two and these two are in a feud, let's have a tag match. Like everyone else, I loved the Swanton/Five star.

Hardcore match- I thought it was great that Trish pinned (whoever it was-Crash?) and thought she was all sneaky. But then, run away Trish! Don't stand around to go through a table.



-The Big Kat
"It's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care." -Peter Gibbons, Office Space
Man O Steel Man
Cotto








Since: 15.4.02
From: Brandon, Fl

Since last post: 4507 days
Last activity: 4507 days
AIM:  
#27 Posted on
Obviously(to me) they used the hardcore clusterfuck this week to introduce the fans to the name WWE. When you hear WWE 30 times in the first 15 minutes it kind of sinks in.

Anyone else think the "f" in "get the f out" stands for FANS?

*ducks*



Glory be the funks on me
shea
Bockwurst








Since: 1.2.02
From: Brooklyn NY

Since last post: 4000 days
Last activity: 3886 days
#28 Posted on
so...

Bubba-Ray Dudley, now all cuddley with the dancing and stuff, is a face, right?

Trish is way over as a face, correct?

So explain to me the logic of Bubba putting Trish through a table?

And while you're at it, explain to me why he then carries her out?

What sense does any of this make? Are we just giving the fans the thrill of a violence-against-women spot for a cheap pop, then "rehabilitating" Bubba so he can get his face heat back?

This is crap. Stupid pandering writers.

(note to Vince: I've had it with women being put through tables, the appeal of which I've never understood. PLEASE CEASE THIS ACTIVITY IMMEDIATELY.)

wannaberockstar
Morcilla








Since: 7.3.02
From: MA

Since last post: 4 days
Last activity: 2 days
AIM:  
ICQ:  
#29 Posted on

    Originally posted by shea
    so...

    Bubba-Ray Dudley, now all cuddley with the dancing and stuff, is a face, right?

    Trish is way over as a face, correct?

    So explain to me the logic of Bubba putting Trish through a table?

    And while you're at it, explain to me why he then carries her out?

    What sense does any of this make?



It's simple... he got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher... couldn't see so he thought he was putting Jazz through a table... felt bad when he found out it was really Trish.
Leroy
Boudin blanc








Since: 7.2.02

Since last post: 8 days
Last activity: 7 days
#30 Posted on
My biggest concern about Flair's turn is the fact that the NWO currently has four members - and now they are aligned with Flair.... well, you do the math.

Normally, I wouldn't even consider the writers stupid enough to try it, but given what they have written lately, who knows....



"It's hard to be a prophet and still make a profit."
- Da Bush Babees
Enojado Viento
Potato korv








Since: 12.3.02
From: Your Grocer's Freezer, NC

Since last post: 722 days
Last activity: 48 days
#31 Posted on
Worse yet, not BOTH shows have heel owners. *sigh*

And none of this really explains all the constant bitching Ric made about the nWo before now.

I kinda hate they turned him so soon. Remember the Austin car angle? Yes, the ending was screwed up but the lead-in was pretty cool with Foley so slowly getting tired of Austin terrorising everyone and starting to have heelish reaction.

I think they coulda milked having Ric on the edge a BIT longer (or turned Austin into a paranoid heel again, kinda invert the heel owner/face wrestler angle) but God knows what the WWEe-Wees are thinking right now, if at all. Maybe this is the slow burn to the end of the split. Lord knows, the shows are becoming more homogenised by the week.





-LS
"I fight alone, but at least I'm gonna die."
Parts Unknown
Lap cheong








Since: 2.1.02
From: Darkenwood

Since last post: 51 days
Last activity: 17 hours
#32 Posted on

    Originally posted by BigDaddyLoco
    I can live with heel Flair if we get heel Arn.


I think it would be cool if Arn decided to stop Flair, stole Benoit from Smackdown and came after him. THAT would be an interesting feud.
The prospect of Kevin Nash as a face after being replaced with the Big Show is somehow more appealing than Kevin Nash as a heel in the nWo. I don't know why.

On Trish through the table - how could you grab Trish by the upper thighs, pick her up with her upper body leaning against you and her hair in your face and STILL think it was freakin' Jazz, even if you had been sprayed with a fire extinguisher in the eyes?
Jazz = stack of bricks
Trish = stack of soft luv



YOU WANT A PIECE OF ME!?! - The immortal, chilling words of...The Shockmaster!
Punkinhed
Salami








Since: 23.1.02

Since last post: 4249 days
Last activity: 4224 days
#33 Posted on

The women's match was noteworthy for Trish's impressive bumps (You know what I mean!). Crash's quick thinking was nice as well.

Eddie, RVD and Hardy = a good time for all.

Brock Lesnar: scary, but they need to broaden his character. Give him a fun 'n easy catchphrase, like "You're next!" Nobody's using it, so why not?

Regal's demolishing of Spike was nasty looking, and the save by D'Lo will hopefully produce something good.

Hogan on the bike was painful. At the end I expected Taker to drape his coat over his fallen comrade and swear vengence, or something like that.

Call me stupidly optimistic, but I really think that this is Flair punishing Austin, and that he hasn't joined the nWo. Big Show looked good too...weeeelll, better anyway.

I thought Molly looked awfully cute in her robe and carrying those flippers to the ring.

Lawler REALLY needs to shut up. I was hoping Molly would kick him in the little King the whole time.

(edited by Punkinhed on 7.5.02 0953)
"To live like hu-man, to be like hu-man…Why is this not in the Plan?"
Net Hack Slasher
Banger








Since: 6.1.02
From: Outer reaches of your mind

Since last post: 3590 days
Last activity: 2010 days
#34 Posted on
I thought this show was really awesome, I buried last weeks Raw as the worse. But this show had comedy (intentially and unintentially and some good matches). Also enjoyed the side-story of WWFerrE and Ross messing up in the first 3 minutes and catching himself(classic) and Big Show saying the dreaded "F" word

-Trish Stratus is a buh-gawd bumping machine. Her match with Jazz was one of their best (which they had a lot of matches). Trish almost got her noise busted with the face plant(and all the washed up mofo Lawler could talk about are her puppies... Get the F out Jerry, I want Raven) She was bumping all over the place and that table spot is without a doubt the most vicious WWF woman spot I've ever seen. (Next Week Raw is in her hometown, give the woman the reward she deserves and give her the women's title already for god sake)

-I am convinced that the Hardcore marry-go-round was just to give Lilian practice in saying "WWE".

-Regal makes me smile everytime he talks... Not a fan of D'lo in his past runs. But I'll keep an open mind

-Speaking of open-minded. I loved the BookDust 7/11 spot. Did anyone notice that Book first sip of the slurpee he made a face like it was gross...lol.. And trying to convince Booker it's all about mindgames. And then slipping the weiner line (funny stuff)... Keep this odd couple together somehow please

-RVD/Jeff v. GoldBook - THe best I've seen Jeff in a long long time. Maybe since Invasion (hey no lita to steat all the heat.. and not matt to geek stuff up)...Swanton/5star was and epic closing.

-swimsuit contest - these usually suck. I thought Molly was pretty funny. But the funniest Line had to be Terri saying "You are jealous of what God gave me" --WHAT?? God?? . what's her plastic surgeons name Dr. Godstein

-Hogan/Taker - That segment rocked all hell... From Taker going on and on and Hogan cutting him off saying "blah blah blah blah"(lawler marking out made it even better... Isn't murphys law that a motorcycle prop will never work on live TV. I remember it happening often... Lawler/Ross stalling while you hear someone else trying to start up the bike... Hogan going 2 miles per hour bumping into walls backstage screaming profanity (WTF... how many times is shit going to be thrown out there by Hogan)

-main event - I'm not going to go on about Bradshaw and xpack in the main again. I've been doing that for weeks... I thought the Austin and Big Show stuff was pretty good.. Austin fall tripping right out of the ring was bizarre...

I actually like turns that you see, it's much better then one that comes out of left feild. I think they did fine, and No I don't think this is nesessary a Flair in nWo but just Flair sick of Austin.

edit in :As for Nash coming out of the Limo, I think his *gimmick* is Big Lazy. HE comes out with 10 minutes left. waddles out of his Limo and goes backstage to sleep.

Line of the night: Undertaker talks about how he'll kick hogans ass. Hogan responce with "Blah Blah Blah Blah"



(edited by Net Hack Slasher on 7.5.02 1309)

(edited by Net Hack Slasher on 7.5.02 1333)
Joseph Ryder
Head cheese








Since: 19.3.02
From: Seattle, WA

Since last post: 1199 days
Last activity: 732 days
#35 Posted on
I don't understand what Jeff Hardy did to make everyone proclaim he looked "better than usual." All he did was hit a swanton and miss a dropkick. Do you mean he looked less sickly?

If sticking him with RVD leads to a sort of rebirth, then great, but it sure wasn't last night.

I will agree though that 7-11 was fun for all. Booker cutting a promo on the RVD cutout, his silly yet hilarious conversation with the clerk...which then led to a reaction when he stepped into the ring. Good times.
wannaberockstar
Morcilla








Since: 7.3.02
From: MA

Since last post: 4 days
Last activity: 2 days
AIM:  
ICQ:  
#36 Posted on

    Originally posted by Parts Unknown
    On Trish through the table - how could you grab Trish by the upper thighs, pick her up with her upper body leaning against you and her hair in your face and STILL think it was freakin' Jazz, even if you had been sprayed with a fire extinguisher in the eyes?
    Jazz = stack of bricks
    Trish = stack of soft luv



Well.. this *IS* the WWF writing team remember, they don't fear the laws of logic... but still, I didn't say it made sense.. I just said what I thought was supposed to happen.. heh.
CxMorgado
Boudin rouge








Since: 21.1.02
From: Boston MA is the rippen'ist town...

Since last post: 304 days
Last activity: 5 hours
#37 Posted on

    Originally posted by wannaberockstar

      Originally posted by Parts Unknown
      On Trish through the table - how could you grab Trish by the upper thighs, pick her up with her upper body leaning against you and her hair in your face and STILL think it was freakin' Jazz, even if you had been sprayed with a fire extinguisher in the eyes?
      Jazz = stack of bricks
      Trish = stack of soft luv



    Well.. this *IS* the WWF writing team remember, they don't fear the laws of logic... but still, I didn't say it made sense.. I just said what I thought was supposed to happen.. heh.



I actually got that feeling as well, along with the feeling that the whole segment had been screwed up once or twice... Stevie Steven-kicks Trish with the ref looking right at him and then he still counts 3? Was Bubba late running in or something? And didn't he have Trish by the hair before the fire extinguisher shot anyways?

Bah. I think too much.



"The next motherfucker who knocks me out of tune, I'm taking their teeth home in a bag."- Harley Cro-mag.
Big Bad
Scrapple








Since: 4.1.02
From: Dorchester, Ontario

Since last post: 4 days
Last activity: 6 hours
#38 Posted on

    I actually got that feeling as well, along with the feeling that the whole segment had been screwed up once or twice... Stevie Steven-kicks Trish with the ref looking right at him and then he still counts 3?


The match was no-DQ



I was born in a manger, like that other guy. You know, he wore a hat?
Dr Unlikely
Frankfurter








Since: 2.1.02

Since last post: 2 days
Last activity: 13 hours
AIM:  
#39 Posted on
The Trish/Jazz match was no DQ, so Richards was allowed to interfere in the match at the end. But yeah, Buh Buh appeared to be getting ready to put Trish through the table before Jazz even got the fire extinguisher, so his being blinded doesn't seem to have much to do with putting Trish through later, anyway.
shea
Bockwurst








Since: 1.2.02
From: Brooklyn NY

Since last post: 4000 days
Last activity: 3886 days
#40 Posted on

    Originally posted by Dr Unlikely
    But yeah, Buh Buh appeared to be getting ready to put Trish through the table before Jazz even got the fire extinguisher...


See? That's what I thought, too. I was thinking that Bubba was pissed that Trish had taken the opportunity to get a cheap pin.

Either way, I am thoroughly sick and tired of women, be they face OR heel, being put through tables by guys that outweigh them by 200 pounds. ENOUGH!

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