On Sunday Night Heat they announced Mohammad Hassan's debut for RAW tomorrow. Ivory made sure that Todd Grisham was driving because she didn't think he should fly "if you catch my drift". Y'know, I always stated that the Hassan character could be good as long as WWE didn't go over the line with it. Congratulations Ivory, because that comment just took it over the line.
Paul London & Chavo Guerreo v. Billy Kidman & Akio was the Heat match. With only 7 matches on the PPV, why not add this to the actual card? Now, the match with the most potential to be best of the night is on the pre-show. Excellent match. The crowd seemed disinterested at first, but the awesome work of these four won them over. If Vince has any soul he'll give these guys a nice push now... at least within the cruiserweight division.
Rob Van Dam & Rey Mysterio d. Kenzo Suzuki & Rene Dupree: Since they're pushing RVD 4:20 again, Rob is allowed to wear his old ECW singlets with 4:20 plastered all over them, as he is tonight. They gave these guys a lot of time, which I guess is necessary considering the rest of the card. Good overall, but they seemed to be having some trouble getting into a good flow. Kenzo Suzuki blows goats in the ring. Several miscommunication spots including Suzuki not knowing how to sell a move. Plus, RVD was supposed to sunset flip Dupree, but Rene forgot to duck so RVD just ended up crashing head first into Dupree. God bless Rob & Rey, they tried, but Dupree & Suzuki just flat-out suck. RVD got the pin with the frogsplash. Again, good overall, but let's give Rob & Rey some better people to work with.
Kurt Angle did his invitational challenge and Santa Claus accepted. No, that's not a typo. Kurt said that he loved going home to see his daughter but all she did was write to Santa. Y'know, if that's ALL your kid is doing then maybe it's time you let her out of the house and took her to the park or something. Kurt called Tazz an elf which was pretty funny. Kurt angle slammed and ankle-locked Santa for the win. He had two cops carrying his 1996 Olympic medal which is probably a shoot considering he stopped taking it on the road because it briefly got stolen back in 2000.
Daniel Puder d. Mike Mizanin: Well, they went the distance. They both wore protective head gear which I think saved Mizanin who took some brutal head-shots. They let the fans decide, which is stupid. Puder won via fan-decision.
BTW, they are did major time killing here, as Teddy Long did a long introduction and then they had Al Snow interview both guys after the match. Daniel Puder tried to cut a promo and proved that managers are still needed in pro-wrestling. Still, if he doesn't win this thing then I'm gonna' be uber-pissed.
Bashams d. Hardcore Holly & Charlie Haas in an un-announced match: Yes, we're an hour into this PPV and only on the third match. Okay match but the crowd couldn't have given two shits. Bashams won via a switcharoo.
They aired the West Side Story Royal Rumble commercial. I don't care what people say, I thought it was great. They did a "We're gonna' rumble tonight" song, then Vince woke up (while wearing SILK PAJAMAS~!) and noted that that wasn't the rumble he had in mind. Rey Mysterio wears a wig on top of his mask and RVD takes the time out to point to himself while in the middle of a song and dance. Now THAT'S dedication.
John Cena d. Jesus: Total squash. Jesus didn't get one offensive move in. Just consisted of Cena beating Jesus around the arena with various objects for 5 minutes. Good booking too, because a straight match with these guys would have sucked. Cena has his own US Title belt, btw, a la Steve Austin and the Smoking Skull belt.
Charlie shoved his tongue down Jackie's throat and then spanked her. Lucky son of a bitch.
Dawn Marie d. Jackie Gayda: Dawn won quickly with a roll-up by using the tights. Charlie then said that he and Dawn were having an affair. He said that Jackie was like making love to a cold, wet fish while Dawn was hotter than Atlanta on the 4th of July. Not sure if that's a compliment or not. Charlie then made it seem like he was gonna' ask Dawn to marry him using Jackie's engagement ring but ended up asking her why she was such a slut. He then walked out on both of them. Okay, then.
Big Show d. Kurt Angle, Mark Jindrak, & Luther Reigns: I think this match is what they put in sleeping pills. Just boring as all hell. Show won with an F-5, and Michael Cole played that up really hard. I guess Brock is on his way back.
Funaki interviewed himself but was interrupted by Spike. They're really building Funaki up as the underdog which means he's getting the title tonight.
Funaki d. Spike Dudley: So far the crowd has been dead for everything except Cena tonight, and this match was no exception. Okay match, but not what a match for the Cruiserweight Title should be. They were building up Funaki as the underground so much that anyone who didn't know the finish must know nothing about wrestling. Funaki wins with a roll-up.
Michael Cole states that New Years Revolution will have a hard time topping Armageddon, which is a lie so big that I thought lightning would strike down on Cole right then and there.
JBL d. Booker T, Eddie Guerrero, and Undertaker: This match had to be blowaway in order for this show to be anything but thumbs down. I hope Eddie & Booker have their working shoes on tonight. They're teasing that JBL has no chance of winning tonight, which of course means that he is. Well, Eddie had his working shoes on tonight as he single handidly carried this thing. Fourway was actually pretty good. Not bloway, but good enough. They went about 30 minutes, and used everything from tables to blood to ladders to Heidenreichs. Undertaker was about to win when Heidenreich attacked him. I guess having shitty matches on PPV and on house shows across the country has earned their feud an extension. Anyways, while that was going on JBL hit the lariat on Booker T for the win.
Well, the main event was good enough to keep this from being worst PPV of the year, as the show was well on it's way to Great American Bash level status. Still, it wasn't enough to save the show from a thumbs down. Save your money and get the Turning Point replay instead. That show kicked this show's ass six ways from Sunday.
(edited by OMEGA on 12.12.04 2308)
The answer to WWE's financial problems...
Never 'Wiener of the Day', and is actually quite bitter about it.
Suzuki did one thing right- he didn't sell Rey's 619 when it was supposed to hit him, but didn't....pretty good opener....The Angle/Santa stuff was worthless....Puder v.s Miz was a surprise, but the crowd seemed to want a KO....Bashams v.s Holly/Haas was a pretty decent match actually, even though Bob's shoulders weren't even CLOSE to being down....
The Royal Rumble promo got the biggest pop of the night in the restaurant where I watched....The Cena/Jesus match went the right way, but the ending seemed like something that would be done to close a feud.....Dawn/Jackie was pretty pointless. I thought Charlie was gonna come out of the closet, in which case WWE would've fired Rico too early....
I didn't care much for the result of the 3 on 1 match. Reigns and Jindrak are just so BORING- I don't care how built and tall they are....Funaki v.s Spike wasn't as good as I expected. I think the other guys in the division are better than both these guys....The main event was watchable. Not a big fan of 'Taker kicking out of TWO of Eddie's frogsplashes though.
All round the show wasen't very good, but the opener was ghood and the ME was very exciting, I wnet for JBL but i wasen't too sure and I was always thinking of a Lesnar run in. Royal Rumble Ad is hilarious and strange at the smae time, Cena's belt is awesome. Not as bad as the Bash but in the resgio definetley. The Eddie/Booker/Taker backstage segment ruled all. The crowd didnt cheer nor did they have much action to cheer for. Overall 5/10.
Let me get this straight... The whole point of the fatal-fourway was to sell the fact that JBL had to get other people to do his dirty work for him. Orlando Jordan, Heidenreich, the Bashams, and more. So, Long put him in a match where he'd actually have to work to survive. And he wins because of Heidenreich. Again.
"Illusions, Michael. A trick is something a whore does for money...or candy!" - G.O.B. Bluth, Arrested Development
- I was hoping for someone on the roster to be under the fake beard and red suit, and was thoroughly disappointed. You only do things like this to establish someone as a strong heel, but with Angle already being pretty over as a heel, what's the point?
- Mizanin's fighting style was downright laughable, flailing his arms about and such. I was REALLY worried that the crowd was going to pick Mizanin, because they seemed to turn on Puder something fierce at one point.
- I agree with Omega that doing Cena/Jesus as a squash was the best way to go. However, I got the impression that Cena wasn't even trying. The F.U. continues to be one of the lamest looking finishers on Smackdown.
Nobody's really commented on Cena's "spinning disc" belt. I thought it was different and a little cool myself.
- Between the ending of Gunn/Haas vs. Bashams and the Jackie vs. Dawn match and after-match shenanigans, they gave a big chunk of time to an angle that absolutely nobody cared about. They then went with quite possibly the worst way to end it ever. The only hope I have is that they ended it that way to disassociate Haas from the storyline completely, because he went nowhere with it. It'd be great if they put him in Angle's stable, just to make up for the two clods in it now.
- The handicap match was incredibly dull. Looks like they're going for another monster push for Big Show (in another thread someone noted speculation that the February PPV was going to be headlined by a Big Show/JBL barbwire match). It'll be great if it builds to the return of Brock Lesnar, but there's been nothing indicating that to be the case outside of the F5 and some interpretation of Cole & Tazz's reaction afterwards.
- Funaki/Dudley was passable, and had the right finish. I was surprised that this was in the "death spot" of the card rather than the Jackie/Dawn Marie match.
- The Fatal Fourway was better than I expected, but still not enough to make me say I don't regret spending money on this show. I saw the Heidenreich interference coming from a mile away, and dreaded each passing moment leading up to it. Was there anyone really clamoring for this feud to be re-ignited? Seriously?
All in all, a bad pay-per-view. However, I wonder how much of it was hindered by the Atlanta crowd (which was absolutely DEAD the entire night sans the main event). Not that they were given all that much to pop for, but damn.
Well of course they have to build up Big Show as a monster it'z almost Royal Rumble time again and I have to admit I love how they have made the Big Show out to be a big monster in the recent Royal Rumbles and battle royals. I'd love to see him go toe to toe against Batista in this year's Rumble.
With all due respect, the only highlight of the evening was the Royal Rumble promo. My god, that was HILARIOUS! How can you beat seeing Triple H and JBL in their "wigs" , doing the West Side Story thing. THAT is how they should've done the Raw vs Smackdown video game commercials. Outside of that, it was crap on a stick. Hell, the main event was quite okay, but then Heebiejeebie happened, and well, Smackdown's reign of crapola continues (no reference to JBL directly, I think he's improved a lot, BUT.....)
It was on Heat. The Dudleyz made fun of/attacked Slaughter, then asked him to get a partner. Saturn bumped into Slaughter in the hallway and did the whole military 'I was Special Forces' yadda yadda yadda.