Originally posted by John OrquiolaMy God, that's right! This sets up a perfect scenario where Triple H nobly loses to three F5s and then Stephanie is furious and slaps him and threatens to divorce him on the spot. Then, out of the crowd, comes Chyna to toss Stephanie out of the ring, setting up a tear jerking reunion with her once and future man Hunter Hearst Helmsley, who curtsey bows to her and they leave to his original Greenwich Snob theme music.
I had tears in my eyes just writing that.
I will buy every WWE PPV for the next 10 years if this happens.
"It breaks your heart. It is designed to break your heart. The game begins in the spring, when everything else begins again, and it blossoms in the summer, filling the afternoons and evenings, and then as soon as the chill rains come, it stops and leaves you to face the fall alone." --- Bart Giamatti, on baseball
Shield over Show/Orton/Sheamus when Sheamus turns heel (SWERVE!)
Rhodes Scholars/Bellas over Tons of Funk
Fandango over Jericho. After the match Curtis uses his own character to buy tickets to the 12:05 showing of Silver Linings Playbook
Preshow- Miz over Barrett
If it happens...
AJ over Kaitlyn Cesaro over Truth or Cesaro wins jobber battle royal (they love those at WM).
"Put on your helmets, we'll be reaching speeds of 3!" "It was nice of you to give that dead woman another chance." "All right, look alive everybody...oh sorry Susan."- MST3K: Space Mutiny Click Here (facebook.com)
Originally posted by Texas KellyFandango will probably be blown up 2 minutes in and how Jericho will get the blame when the match is poorly received because Fandango is a useless piece of deadweight that blows up after 30 seconds of punches and a top-rope legdrop.
I'm guessing Fandango has developed better cardio from weeks of ballroom dance training than a lot of the wrestlers have.
Originally posted by Texas KellyCesaro will get caught yodeling backstage by Ron Simmons and be hit with a 'DAMN!'.
On the other hand I would like to bet a year's salary on this one happening.
Originally posted by John OrquiolaThis sets up a perfect scenario where Triple H nobly loses to three F5s and then Stephanie is furious and slaps him and threatens to divorce him on the spot. Then, out of the crowd, comes Chyna to toss Stephanie out of the ring, setting up a tear jerking reunion with her once and future man Hunter Hearst Helmsley, who curtsey bows to her and they leave to his original Greenwich Snob theme music.
On the other other hand I would like to pay a year's salary to make this happen.
Originally posted by Texas KellyCesaro will get caught yodeling backstage by Ron Simmons and be hit with a 'DAMN!'.
On the other hand I would like to bet a year's salary on this one happening.
Simmons walks in, says "VERDAMMT! MALEDIZIONE! ZUT! FIEU!" Cesaro and Simmons look to the camera, look back to each other, look to the camera again. Simmons says "DAMN!" Cole and Lawler fake laugh. Cesaro is told a few weeks later he has to pay for any family members he brought in for Wrestlemania weekend.
I think people should also have to predict, in descending order, the length of: -Diddy's performance -Time taken by HHH to get from the ring through the curtain/entrance after the end of Lesnar/HHH -Total length of Tons of Fun/Funkadactyls vs. Rhodes Scholars/Bellas match
Originally posted by Dr UnlikelyI think people should also have to predict, in descending order, the length of: -Diddy's performance -Time taken by HHH to get from the ring through the curtain/entrance after the end of Lesnar/HHH -Total length of Tons of Fun/Funkadactyls vs. Rhodes Scholars/Bellas match
I think I'm aiming too low with these, but I'm hoping everyone else aims high...
- Tons of Funkadactyls vs Cody Bellascholars: 12 minutes. - DIDDY: 11 minutes. - HHH: 3 minutes for the Metallica song of his choosing, 6 minutes for his proper entrance. (9 total)
Also, I'm psyched for the return of Living Colour!
Here are some more thoughts from a demented mind in Central Florida:
Originally posted by texasranger9 Brock Lesnar(Wrestlers with their career on the line at WM are win less right? All the way back to Savage?)
(edited by texasranger9 on 3.4.13 1129)
(edited by texasranger9 on 3.4.13 1620)
False. See: Giant, Andre The - Wrestlemania I vs. Big John Studd in a Bodyslam Challenge vs. Retirement match; Warrior, Ultimate - Wrestlemania VII vs. Randy "Macho King" Savage in a Career Ending Match. But it's an otherwise interesting point you make.
Originally posted by John Orquiola This sets up a perfect scenario where Triple H nobly loses to three F5s and then Stephanie is furious and slaps him and threatens to divorce him on the spot. Then, out of the crowd, comes Chyna to toss Stephanie out of the ring, setting up a tear jerking reunion with her once and future man Hunter Hearst Helmsley, who curtsey bows to her and they leave to his original Greenwich Snob theme music.
I had tears in my eyes just writing that.
(edited by John Orquiola on 3.4.13 1003)
I won't lie. If this happens, my favorite Wrestlemania Moment (TM) will still be Hogan slamming Andre, dropping the leg, and pinning him at WM3.
But this would become a close second.
So yeah, if it's Wrestlemania Week, then I must be logging in to make my predictions. This will make the second-straight Wrestlemania I haven't watched because I'm otherwise booked to announce at a roller derby bout. But hey, let's do this!
The Most Must-See Interactive Pre-Show Match in WrestleMania History: For the WWE Intercontinental Championship: Wade Barrett (C) vs. The Miz - They wouldn’t give this to Miz, would they? I mean, they wouldn’t have titles change hands on a pre-show, would they? Wait, what? The Body Donnas beat the Godwins for the vacant WWF Tag Team Titles on the pre-show for WMXII? And The Colons unified the Tag Team Titles over John Morrison and the previously-mentioned Miz in the dark match at WMXXV(th Anniversary) (Thanks for that, Kid Rock and Divas)? Oh. Yeah, well then, never mind. Winner: Miz.
If It Happens (Once In A Wrestlemania) - For United States Championship : Antonio Cesaro (c) vs. R Truth - Winner: Antonio Cesaro.
If It Happens (Twice In A Wrestlemania) - For WWE Divas Championship : Kaitlyn (c) vs. AJ Lee - Winner: AJ Lee.
8 Mixed Persons Tag Team Match : Tons of Funk (Brodus Clay and Sweet T) and The Funkadactyls (Naomi and Cameron) vs. Team Rhodes Scholars (Damien Sandow and Cody Rhodes) and The Bella Twins (Nikki and Brie) - Going to go with Winner: Bellas and Rhodes Scholars.
Chris Jericho vs. Fandango - Chris Jericho 2013: Arrive. Put over new/rising guy. Leave. (Thank you, Meme Gene Okerlund.) Winner: Fandango.
Feed Me More Wall Of Pain Match: Mark Henry vs. (The) Ryback - Put me in the camp that suggests this could be a surprisingly entertaining big man match. At the same time, having flashbacks of Batista doing the Most Botched Bastista Bomb Evar on Umaga at WMXXIV in Orlando, I can also see Ryback messing up his finisher on Henry, as well. With that said, if the rumors are true about Mark Henry taking time off after Wrestlemania, that more or less tells me who’s winning. Winner: Ryback.
The Almost Everyone's Dated AJ Match For the WWE Tag Team Championship: WWE Tag Team Champions Team Hell No (Daniel Bryan and Kane) vs. Dolph Zigger and Big E. Langston (with AJ Lee) - I was initially going to say that Ziggler and Big E would take this one. But I have a sneaking suspicion that Dolph will play a bigger role than this for this year’s Wrestlemania. For this one, I’ll say Winner : Team Hell No.
Six Man Tag Team Match : The Shield (Roman Reigns, Seth Rollins, and Dean Ambrose) vs. Sheamus, Randy Orton, and The Big Show - Keep The Shield strong, E. Keep ‘em strong. Winner: The Shield.
No Holds Barred With Triple H's Career On The Line : Triple H vs. Brock Lesnar (with Paul Heyman) - They’re out of their damned minds if they put H over here. I also like to think that, with the good things he’s done recently (Trying to improve the tag team division, some good signings, BRUNO!), he might just be smart enough to put his ego aside and do the right thing, even if it means he’ll have lost at three Wrestlemanias in a row (He won the last two prior to that, and he was on a four-WM-losing streak from 2004 to 2008 (DNP 2007.).) So with that, I will take: Winner : BRRRRROCK LESNAR!!!
In his 21st Defense of His Legendary Undefeated Streak : The Undertaker vs. CM Punk - Hey, remember when there was all that talk of Taker vs. Cena a few years back? That would’ve honestly made me believe that the Streak might just end, even if the fanbase would’ve completely shit all over Cena for it. That said, as much as I like Punk on T.V., rumors with him taking time off lead me to believe that he will not end The Streak. (Whether I wish to see Taker compete again at Wrestlemania after this year remains to be seen, however. 21-and-0 is not a bad way to end a career, bra.) Winner : Undertaker (21-and-0, bitch!).
"Twice in a Lifetime" for the WWE Championship : The Rock (c) vs. John Cena - Honestly, with even-steven booking here, I can’t see Rock winning here. About the only doubt I have in my mind is whether Cena will actually turn heel here, or do a “partial” heel turn (tweener thing, circa C.M. Punk around 2009), or no heel turn. Winner : John Cena.
For the World Heavyweight Championship : Alberto Del Rio (c) (with Ricardo Rodriguez) vs. Jack Swagger (with Zeb Coulter) - Hey, Zeb, hope you enjoyed one of the biggest pushes of your career. Thanks for taking Swagger’s stoned ass along for the ride. Winner: Alberto Del Rio retains.
But such leads to….
Money In The Bank Cash-In – Mr. Money In The Bank Dolph Ziggler vs. Alberto Del Rio (c) - for the first time since Wrestlemania XXI in 2005, both World Titles change hands. Winner: Dolph Ziggler is your New World Heavyweight Champion.
Why yes, I am both a musician and a lawyer. Thanks for asking. :)
Well, now we know for sure that Cena is not turning to the dark side on sunday................J.R is talking about it.
Jim Ross recently sat down with Joe Roderick from Grand Slam Sports. Here are some highlights from the interview:
If it seems Cena has been teasing a heel turn:
"It seems that way. Last night, I was going into the show thinking that Rock won last year, so Cena will automatically win this year to even their big match rivalry at one apiece. But after last night, I'm not so sure that's going to happen. I was intrigued that Cena's promo was a little bit edgy. I thought, is that just the character, the persona, being what it's cast to be, or is it the human being processing what I said earlier? We have to follow everything. We have to close the show. It's game day for us. So I don't know. It's provocative to me because I try to stay away from all the creative stuff. I don't want to know what's going to happen. I don't have any desire to know the end of the movie. I want to see it unfold. So, I'm somewhat intrigued by the whole process, especially after last night's RAW."
How many times a day he's asked on Twitter if Cena's going to turn heel:
"I can't count [laughter]. I have a lot of standard questions on Twitter. It's quite the adventure. The Twitterverse is a very unique world we live in, social media wise. That's certainly one of the most prominent ones [questions]. What I don't understand is this. You already have half the audience who boo him. They're the same ones that want him to be a bad guy. But they're already booing him. What do you want? You want him to be a bad guy so now what? You can cheer him? I don't get it sometimes. It's a confounding conundrum, to say the least, the demographic of WWE and their male fan base that like to boo John Cena. An old promoter told me one time, "As long as there's a rear end every 18 inches, it doesn't matter." They're a ticket buyer, and they've paid there way in so it doesn't matter."
Now, he has a point in his second post, there are some calling for it who say they'll cheer him if he heels it up on sunday, which kinda misses the point don't you think? I'd personally rather see him turn tweener than full heel because I'd love to se him properly acknowledge the booing in a 'fuck you, assholes' kind of way, rather than in the 'lalala, not really listening' passive agressive manner that he does now. It'll be catharsis for me & a large portion of the fan base, and trust me, It'll be major catharsis for him.
Thanks to the eternity of time that Vince has waited to do anything about it, the novelty of all the above will take a long while to fade.
Here are some more thoughts from a demented mind in Central Florida:
Originally posted by Tyler Durden
Originally posted by FLRockAndLaw8 Mixed Persons
Wait! What?
Hey, don't blame me. Cut 'n' pasted from John Orquiola in the thread's original post. And what's the prob, anywho?
Originally posted by Tyler DurdenAnd #MusicMyOlderSisterLikedWhenSheWasYoung: PDiddy? Living Colour? Kid Rock ain't available this year?
Right there with ya on Diddy, but let's not hate on Living Colour. I prefer to be thankful that the E's actually bringing in an actual band of actual musicians who actually play, you know, rock music. Also, Living Colour's got NYC/NJ ties, so there's that, too. (Furthermore, their first two albums kicked ass.)
Why yes, I am both a musician and a lawyer. Thanks for asking. :)
Getting pretty psyched for Sunday. I hit up the Superstore at the stadium last night for a t-shirt (after passing on the football jersey), lanyard and program (by the way, if you want the program and get the chance to pick it up before Sunday, then do so and leave it at home or the hotel...that thing is *massive* to be carrying around all day). I'll be enjoying the show from the comfort of one of the upper level suites with two friends with whom I attended WM's 18, 19 and 20. We got the band back together for this one.
My only regret this year is not getting the time to do some anagrams/word play. I had some good jokes, too.
I can't wait to go home afterwards and listen to how the commentators addressed the crowd reactions for this show. I fully expect Punk, Lesnar, Henry and The Shield to be very heavily cheered over their opponents, and also think there's a strong possibility the crowd will shit on *both* Rock and Cena.
The Most Must-See Interactive Pre-Show Match in WrestleMania History: For the WWE Intercontinental Championship: Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett vs. The Miz Miz
8 Person Mixed Tag Team Match: Tons of Funk (Brodus Clay and Sweet T) and The Funkadactyls (Naomi and Cameron) vs. Team Rhodes Scholars (Damien Sandow and Cody Rhodes) and The Bella Twins (Nikki and Brie) Bellas and Rhodes Scholars
Chris Jericho vs. Fandango Fandango
Mark Henry vs. (The) Ryback Ryback
The Almost Everyone's Dated AJ Match For the WWE Tag Team Championship: WWE Tag Team Champions Team Hell No (Daniel Bryan and Kane) vs. Dolph Zigger and Big E. Langston (with AJ Lee) Team Hell No
Six Man Tag Team Match: The Shield (Roman Reigns, Seth Rollins, and Dean Ambrose) vs. Sheamus, Randy Orton, and The Big Show The Shield
For the World Heavyweight Championship: World Heavyweight Champion Alberto Del Rio (with Ricardo Rodriguez) vs. Jack Swagger (with Zeb Coulter) Swagger
This is the sleeper match of the card. Hopefully, the crowd doesn't overrun it with "We Want Ziggler!" chants.
No cash-in by Ziggler after this match. Rather, Ziggler waits until Swagger's in the ring later for the Sin Cara-led Harlem Shake.
No Holds Barred With Triple H's Career On The Line: Triple H vs. Brock Lesnar (with Paul Heyman) Lesnar
In his 21st Defense of His Legendary Undefeated Streak: The Undertaker vs. CM Punk Undertaker
"Twice in a Lifetime" for the WWE Championship: WWE Champion The Rock vs. John Cena John Cena
John Cena vs. The Rock – WWE Title – Cena wins in a not so clean fashion. I don’t see it ending clean with a handshake and hand raising and good feelings all around. Something screwy is going to happen here. I don’t think Cena will turn fully heel at the event, but the win will cast some doubt and people will call him out on it. I think the big summer angle this year will be a Cena turn. This will be the start of it.
Jack Swagger vs. Alberto del Rio – World Title –Swagger hasn’t caught on the way they had hoped (you think years of jobbing him has anything to do with it??) but I still think he’s going to walk out of Mania with the strap setting up a rematch at the next PPV where del Rio gets the belt back, only for Dolph Ziggler to cash in his Money in the Bank case there, ending the del Rio/Swagger program and starting a Ziggler/del Rio program leading in to the summer. Ziggler does not cash in at Mania.
CM Punk vs. Undertaker – We all know Taker wins this one. Taker has had very hard hitting, show stopping matches at the last 4 Manias. He’s older and more broken down now. This match will not be like those. This will be Punk stalling and trying to goad the Undertaker in to a DQ or him trying to get a countout victory. Lots of stalling and laying around here. This will not be an all time classic, bell-to-bell, all action match, but the story being told between these two vets will compensate for that. Punk eventually gets caught and Taker absolutely destroys him to end the match, and destroys him in a way that we will not see Punk for several months so he can get the time off he absolutely deserves. Maybe even a stretcher job.
HHH vs. Brock Lesnar – I’m going to go out on a limb and against all conventional wisdom and will say Brock actually takes this match. Brock has had two matches since he’s been back. He lost one – though he dominated Cena the entire time – and he won the other, which was against HHH at SummerSlam. I don’t think they’ll have him lose again. This will be a very hard hitting, very stiff match. Hopefully we’ll even see some blood. But HHH does the right thing and goes out at Mania. He’s an office guy now and even if he loses here he can still come back and have matches. I think Shawn Michaels is the only guy in wrestling history to lose a retirement match and stay retired. They will build to an eventual Rock/Brock match, maybe at SummerSlam this year, or maybe Mania next year, but I don’t see Brock losing at all from here on out until then.
Chris Jericho vs. Fandango – Fandango is getting a huge push. I love his character. Johnny Curtis is a great performer, and with Jericho leading the way, this match will be the sleeper match of the show. Fandango wins.
The Shield vs. Big Show/Sheamus/Randy Orton – The Shield wins after Orton turns on Sheamus and Big Show. Orton will NOT end up having anything to do with The Shield and ultimately their win will be over shadowed by Orton turning heel again and costing his team the match.
Mark Henry vs. Ryback – With a Cena turn possibly on the horizon, I see them pushing Ryback up to the top and having him feud with Cena eventually. Ryback has not won a PPV match since…..I don’t even remember when. Ryback gets the win here after a big show of strength, such as getting Henry up for the shellshock (which he hopefully doesn’t botch like when he tried it on Tensai that one time).
Team Hell No vs. Zig E – Tag Titles – I can see this going either way, honestly. This one is completely up in the air, but I’m going to say Hell No loses the titles to Ziggler and Big E. This finally begins the break up of Team Hell No with them feuding with each other, leading to Daniel Bryan turning full on heel, losing the comedy act, and becoming a serious ass kicker in the ring and him getting a push in to the summer months.
Tons of Funk/The Funkadactyls vs. Team Rhodes Scholars/The Bellas – Does it really matter who wins here? Honestly, though, the Funkadactyls are actually quite good in the ring, and The Bellas do know how to be great heels. In the end, I see some big flashy moves from The Funkadactyls suprising lots of people and one of them getting the pin on one of The Bellas to win the match for their team. The guys are just there to get them on the card and won’t play to much in to the outcome of the match, despite carrying much of the in-ring action.
PRE-SHOW – The Miz vs. Wade Barrett – IC Title – Don’t really care much about either of these guys. I’ll say The Miz gets the win and the belt here, though, to help make the YouTube Pre-Show seem a little more “must see” for people who don’t usually tune in for it.
With the pre-show being an hour long instead of the usual 30 minutes, I think they’ll also try to get one other match in there, possibly the traditional “Let’s get the rest of the guys on the show Battle Royal”. If they do that, Antonio Cesaro will win to make up for them screwing him by not getting a match on the real card.
So there ya go. My 100% accurate predictions for WM 29
WRESTLEMANIA 29 ... WHERE IT ALL BEGINS ... AGAIN ... AGAIN!
Realizing there simply are no new creative ideas left, Vince McMahon is forced to recycle old pay-per-view finishes. A gang of writers is left alone in a production truck, watching a week's worth of pay-per-views, and told to come up with the best show they can using these shows.
Wade Barrett defeats the Miz when Ric Flair turns heel and anoints Barrett the NEW future of the WWE. Miz vows revenge, then jobs clean to Zach Ryder the following night.
Big Show, Sheamus, and Orton defeat The Shield, when Big Show chokeslams all 3 guys and pins them in about 45 seconds.
Hell No defeats Dolph Ziggler. It is announced it's now two out of three falls. Dolph loses again immediately.
John Cena is lured into the parking garage by The Rock, where he is promptly run over. Hall of Famer Mick Foley believes the driver was blonde.
Mark Henry defeats Ryback after the fans spend the entire match chanting "BORING" and "YOU SOLD OUT". Steve Austin enters and kills both, then Vince McMahon apologizes to the fans.
The Undertaker defeats CM Punk because it's Wrestlemania.
Paul Heyman begs Brock Lesnar to reconsider his upcoming match with Triple H; reminding him he's told him over and over, he can't beat Triple H.
Triple H defeats Brock Lesnar in 5 minutes after Lesnar throws Hunter around like a rag doll, but jobs to a Paul Heyman heel turn.
The Rock writes a new song to the tune of Jail House Rock, but sings it about Big Show's father, on the really insensitive 13 year and 142 days anniversary of his death.
Left without an opponent, our main event is now ...
The Big Show defeats The Rock to win the WWE Championship; Show tearfully proclaims this one for his dad.
Also, Albert returned with full body hair and it was horrible.
An addition to the possible happenings tonight...possible spoiler: "We have heard from a few sources that Steve Austin is in Los Angeles, the site of tonight's episode of Raw, and was backstage at the show earlier today.