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The W - One Question... - Worst Movie You Have Ever Seen In the Theater
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Lise
Mrs. Guru








Since: 11.12.01

Since last post: 477 days
Last activity: 19 days
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.40
Considering that I've seen a lot of bad movies, but very very few on a date (I went to way more movies with friends than dates) I thought I'd start a new thread.

I used to get a lot of free movie passes and preview passes when I worked at Gameworks. Somehow we ended up with preview passes for Batman and Robin at the Cinerama in Seattle. It is one of the few movies that I really would have asked for my money back if I'd paid to get in. The theater was packed and EVERYONE was bitching about how bad it was on the way out.

The worst I paid for was Little Buddah, that cast Keanu Reeves as Buddah. The film is loosely based on a real story, where a young american boy is found to possibly be the reincarnation of a Buddhist figure. The film relies almost entirely on symbolic imagery, and fails to have any sort of cohesive plot or believable dialogue. A storybook is used to transition to Life of Buddah flashbacks, which are more there for western information than to support the story at all. My favorite amazingly absurd scene is where the father pulls over to the side of a Downtown Seattle overpass (none of these have shoulders) during the late afternoon, gets out of the car, and stares out over the freeway. While his dad is contemplating death by I-5, the little boy busts out his buddah storybook and starts reading on the overpass which of course throws us into a Buddah flashback. This movie is infamous among my friends because at the point where Buddah is acheiving Nirvana, there is a horde of archers flinging flaming arrows, to which a friend of mine suddenly stands up in the theater and starts yelling "It's a giant beer commercial! Buddah is going to stand up and say "All I wanted was a Bud Light." All 4 people still in the theater (everyone else had walked out) laughed.
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AWArulz
Knackwurst








Since: 28.1.02
From: Louisville, KY

Since last post: 2 hours
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#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.22
I'd have to say Sherlock Holmes Smarter Brother.

I know some people like it, but I found it boorish and so below Wilder, Kahn and Feldman. The only redeeming characteristic was Dom DeLuise.



We'll be back right after order has been restored here in the Omni Center.


“That the universe was formed by a fortuitous concourse of atoms, I will no more believe than that the accidental jumbling of the alphabet would fall into a most ingenious treatise of philosophy” - Swift

Mr Heel II
Lap cheong








Since: 25.2.02

Since last post: 38 days
Last activity: 14 hours
#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.11
After they set the bar with Star Trek IV, anticipation was high on Star Trek V.

WOW.

That may very well have been the ultimate letdown in the world of letdowns.

What a waste of fifty cents (I had a deal on tickets back then).
Zeruel
Thirty Millionth Hit
Moderator








Since: 2.1.02
From: The Silver Spring in the Land of Mary.

Since last post: 1 day
Last activity: 16 hours
#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.05
    Originally posted by Mr Heel II
    After they set the bar with Star Trek IV, anticipation was high on Star Trek V.

    WOW.

    That may very well have been the ultimate letdown in the world of letdowns.

    What a waste of fifty cents (I had a deal on tickets back then).


I have to agree with you there, but I think it doesn't suck now as bad as it did then.

Yes, it was VERY hard to follow up to IV, but I got the special edition DVD and watched it for the first time since I saw it in the theater. I actually thought it was pretty good.

It was a good story about loyalty, life, and family. The camping scenes were a nice bookend to show that these men have spent many years together and they are the closest thing to family as they have. Except for Sulu, as they show in VII (Generations). Spock must choose between the brother he never got to know and his brothers-in-arms who he knows very well.



-- 2006 Time magazine Person of the Year --

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KJames199
Scrapple
Moderator








Since: 10.12.01
From: #yqr

Since last post: 18 hours
Last activity: 29 min.
#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 9.00
Coyote Ugly. No question.



JK: LJ, S&H, KMA, FB
Matt Tracker
Scrapple








Since: 8.5.03
From: North Carolina

Since last post: 1 day
Last activity: 55 min.
#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.31
Dude, Where's My Car?

The trailers did a fine job hoodwinking me.



"To be the man, you gotta beat demands." -- The Lovely Mrs. Tracker
samoflange
Lap cheong








Since: 22.2.04
From: Cambridge, MA

Since last post: 429 days
Last activity: 422 days
#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.07
Dumb and Dumberer

The real one with Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels is probably my favorite movie. I knew this one was going to very bad, but my friends and I went opening night out of weird mix of loyalty and curiosity.

The short bus gag was pretty good though.



Lloyd: When I met Mary, I got that old fashioned romantic feeling, where I'd do anything to bone her.
Harry: That's a special feeling.
DJ FrostyFreeze
Knackwurst








Since: 2.1.02
From: Hawthorne, CA

Since last post: 3 days
Last activity: 12 min.
#8 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.99
Read it and weep, fella


I know I'm in the minority here (still!), but I really hated the first Harry Potter movie. My GF at the time (now wife) and I got dragged to it by another couple we used to hang out with and it was pretty terrible. One of those movies where everything that happened before the last 20 minutes was completely pointless and left me asking myself "Why did I have to watch all that other crap again?".

We've been defending our position on this movie ever since. Ugh.



CLICK OR DIE
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Leroy
Boudin blanc








Since: 7.2.02

Since last post: 1 day
Last activity: 1 day
#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.11
The first film I thought of was First Knight (1995), only because three of us went to see it, all of us wanted to walk out, but no one wanted to be the first one to say something.

Quicksilver (1986) was the first film I remember as being a bad film.

But the nod has to go to Maid to Order (1987), starring Ally Sheedy and Beverly D'Angelo. I have no recollection of why I went to see this movie - but I remember it being God-awful. Come to think of it, there might be a tie between it and 18 Again! (1988) starring George Burns and someone named Charlie Schlatter.

Hell, it was Orange County during the 80's. We all did things we regret to pass the time.

(edited by Leroy on 8.7.08 2241)



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General Zod
Italian








Since: 1.10.05
From: Mesa, Arizona

Since last post: 896 days
Last activity: 85 days
#10 Posted on | Instant Rating: 9.56
    Originally posted by Leroy
    The first film I thought of was First Knight (1995), only because three of us went to see it, all of us wanted to walk out, but no one wanted to be the first one to say something.


Wow! I had a very similar experience (I think I just peed a little).

Besides "First Knight", I must nominate "Gleaming the Cube" (because one can skateboard from Irvine to Disneyland in 15 minutes) and second "Batman and Robin."



(edited by General Zod on 8.7.08 1754)


Hell, I can get you a toe by three o'clock this afternoon...with nail polish.
Dexley's Midnight Jogger
Pepperoni
Moderator








Since: 10.10.02
From: New Hampshire

Since last post: 320 days
Last activity: 235 days
#11 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.18
Universal Soldier: The Return
Oliver
Scrapple








Since: 20.6.02
From: Kolob

Since last post: 10 days
Last activity: 3 hours
#12 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.38
Superbad. I hated hated HATED that movie; I now refuse to watch anything with Jonah Hill or Seth Rogen in starring roles.

Second place goes to INSOMNIA. Ironic title, as I fell asleep watching it.

Oh, and I may be in the minority, but I loved Dude, Where's My Car.




You wouldn't like Ozu Makito when he's mad!




CajunMan
Boudin blanc
No longer registered








Since: 2.1.02
From: Give me a Title shot!

Since last post: 1157 days
Last activity: 294 days
#13 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.85
Soul Plane
Karlos the Jackal
Lap cheong








Since: 2.1.02
From: The City of Subdued Excitement

Since last post: 9 days
Last activity: 2 hours
#14 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.00
Raising Cain (imdb.com).

Oh, and The Wraith (imdb.com), but we enjoyed making fun of it.

--K



Last 5 movies seen: The Monolith Monsters ** - WALL-E **** - Vantage Point **1/2 - A Fool There Was *** - Rhubarb **1/2
JST
Toulouse








Since: 20.1.02
From: Quebec City, CAN

Since last post: 11 days
Last activity: 23 hours
#15 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.80
Nacho Libre. First time I've actually left the theater before the end. The wrestling purist in me simply took over.



Lexus
Bierwurst








Since: 2.1.02
From: Stafford, VA

Since last post: 4 days
Last activity: 1 day
AIM:  
#16 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.42
I'd say Batman and Robin, but Bulletproof all of a sudden came to mind. If you want to look it up on IMDB after you've clicked on some of the other links, go ahead. Adam Sandler, Damon Wayans, non-comedy.

(edited by Lexus on 9.7.08 0453)


"Laugh and the world laughs with you. Frown and the world laughs at you."
-Me.
StaggerLee
Scrapple








Since: 3.10.02
From: Right side of the tracks

Since last post: 1 day
Last activity: 1 day
#17 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.75
Clue. The ONLY movie I've ever walked out on. Tim Curry can kiss my ass!
tarnish
Frankfurter








Since: 13.2.02
From: Back in the Heart of Hali

Since last post: 559 days
Last activity: 13 hours
AIM:  
Y!:
#18 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.40

Dungeons & Dragons.

Quoth a buddy of mine as we left the theatre, "I'm sure I caught a stray Adidas logo on [Marlon Wayans' character] Snails."

Jeremy Irons must seriously have needed a fiscal injection.
jfkfc
Liverwurst








Since: 9.2.02

Since last post: 156 days
Last activity: 3 days
#19 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.38
A toss-up...Maniac Cop, Drop Dead Fred, or Drillbit Taylor.
Mike Zeidler
Pepperoni








Since: 27.6.02

Since last post: 129 days
Last activity: 89 days
#20 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.00
I've only ever walked out of one movie - "3000 miles to Graceland" because it was just so, so horrible.

My wife wanted to hurt me after I made her sit through "Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow" but I felt it was payback for her forcing me to sit through the Lord of the Rings movies.

I actually got shushed three or four times during Fellowship of the Rings before my wife finally turned to me and said quite loudly "Will you shut up already?" (I think it's because I called the dwarf Ram-Man).

But then, I liked "The Adventure of Sherlock Holmes' Smarter Brother", so it takes all kinds.

(I'm really happy that the current Hulk movie is on course to make LESS money than the much maligned, better Ang Lee version)



"Tattoos are the mullets of the aughts." - Mike Naimark
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One of the reasons they didn't catch on was that alot of people held onto them like they were some sort of collectors item. I'm one that doesn't mind carrying around change (I have a change holder in my wallet)
- Kevintripod, Dollar bills or dollar coins? (2006)
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