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21.9.14 1922
The W - Pro Wrestling - Unwritten Rules Of Wrestling (Page 2)
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Swordsman Yen
Frankfurter








Since: 16.2.02
From: Shaolin

Since last post: 3905 days
Last activity: 3889 days
#21 Posted on

    Originally posted by BDC
    I mean, how is this an unwritten rule? When does anyone besides RVD ever do this? You're just describing a wrestling move, not a rule.

    BDC



I believe Steve Blackman did it for one, and it's been done several times in numerous WWF and WCW hardcore matches by others not named RVD, except maybe a dropkick was substituted in. Jerry Lawler once pointed out what I was trying to get at with this "wrestling move": "Why do they catch the chair? You know he's just going to hit you with it."



"Say 'what' again. SAY 'WHAT' AGAIN! I dare you, I double dare you, motherf--ker! Say 'what' one more goddamn time!" -- Samuel L. Jackson, Pulp Fiction (1994)
Eradicator
Kolbasz








Since: 4.1.02
From: Chicago

Since last post: 40 days
Last activity: 40 days
#22 Posted on
Sorry if there are any repeats:

* It's cool with the announcers if you cheat and are a face, but if you are a heel and cheat then that makes you a "bastard." An example- face announcers being totally cool with Lita ALWAYS interfering on behalf of the Hardys, but when they showed the footage of Chuck & Billy winning the titles, JR made it to seem like a win they didn't deserve because Chuck was not the legal man when he delievered his superkick.

* When tag teams start to not get along they also start mistiming and botching moves in EVERY match, especially if one is holding an opponent's arms behind his back. Also, one member of the team is almost sure to become a cocky, arrogant jerk.

*When you're a face you can beat just about anybody cleanly, but if you're a heel you can beat just about nobody cleanly- even if you are a world champion.

*If you are a woman face and get beat up the guys that did it are the biggest creeps in the whole world, even if you interfered in the match. If you are a woman heel and get beat you probably deserved it.

* Accidently spilling hot coffee on someone is the worst thing you could do, and a giant fued will start because of it. Oh sorry, that's one of those 'one time only things,' not an unwritten rule.

But this is one:

* Hot coffee will hurt so badly that it will almost definitely cost you a match if it is thrown in your face.

* If you're a 'badass' then you can't wear a title belt around your waist. You must drape it over your shoulder or drag it behind you.

* If you're a heel you must refuse to let the referee raise your hand after a victory. You raise your OWN hand!

* If you want to win a belt the way to signal that to everyone is making the "belt gesture" to your waist.

* A move is ten times deadlier if it is done behind the ref's back, and is done by the illegal man in a tag team match.

*Pulling an opponent's tights makes it almost impossible for him to raise his shoulder. Ditto for putting feet on the ropes.

*If an important match is going on no need to worry about getting counted out. You can fight on the outside all you like, and the countout is ignored.

*If you fight someone on TV it will only take a few minutes to either win or lose. If you fight the same guy on a PPV it will take about three times as long to reach a decision.

(edited by Eradicator on 26.2.02 1416)
"...the people ran, they ran all right, they ran right to the toilet, pulled their pants down, took one big Hulk-a-CRAP every time you opened your mouth!"
odessasteps
Scrapple








Since: 2.1.02
From: MD, USA

Since last post: 96 days
Last activity: 63 days
#23 Posted on

A signature move that a heel tries routinely and fails will work as a face. (Flair off the top turnbuckle, Jericho and the Lionsault)

The only people (with rare exceptions) that headbutt are blacks, polynesians and "mutants" (Missing Link for example). Otherwise, the head butt hurts both the man on offense and the man on defense.





"Will you SHUT UP? I haven't written a word in a year -nothing I haven't thrown out in years! Do you know what that's like? When it's just you and a blank sheet of paper? When you can't think of a SINGLE thing worth saying, a single character that people could believe in, a single story that hasn't been told a thousand times before!" -- Richard Modoc, "Calliope," Sandman 17, Neil Gaiman.
ripblazer
Pickled pork








Since: 16.1.02
From: Calgary Alberta Canada

Since last post: 3435 days
Last activity: 3267 days
#24 Posted on
Typically, the only part of a wrestler's body that bleeds is his forehead.

Wrestlers have a universal exemption from criminal laws regarding kidnapping someone, beating them with any handy object, running over them with a vehicle and stealing, vandalizing and/or destroying their property.

If you are about to fight someone with punches, kicks, slams and holds, it's very intimidating to shove them first.

Even if you lose, just beat up the other guy afterwards and you get to hear your music.


You may hit the boss and the rest of his family without too much danger of being fired.


WTF13
Boerewors








Since: 22.1.02

Since last post: 4428 days
Last activity: 4428 days
#25 Posted on
I can't believe I forgot the rule about headbutts! I guess that one has kind of fallen by the wayside. A related rule is that double headsmashes [the old "noggin knocker" where you smash the opposing teams' heads together] never work on Samoans. They just stare at you and then beat you up, usually headbutting you.

Oh, and YOU CAN'T POWERBOMB KIDMAN!



"No one has a beer party at Scott Hall's expense!"
MoeGates
Andouille








Since: 6.1.02
From: Brooklyn, NY

Since last post: 33 days
Last activity: 3 days
#26 Posted on
Any wrestler automatically knows how to perform a devestating version of his opponent's finishing move. However, they forget how when not facing that particular opponent anymore.

Moe



And you know this...Man!
WTF13
Boerewors








Since: 22.1.02

Since last post: 4428 days
Last activity: 4428 days
#27 Posted on
Contract signings always result in a beatdown of some kind.

Bringing your wife, girlfriend, sister, or other female family member to the ring will result in her either being insulted or propositioned by your foes.

When a wrestler makes unwanted romantic advances toward someone else, they will somehow wind up on a date with that person, but the date will end with the wrestler being beaten up or humiliated.

Any sort of celebration or ceremony results in some type of humiliation or beating. I know someone mentioned weddings earlier, but I've also seen it apply to receiving any type of trophy or award. And if there is a cake, someone will end up wearing it--usually a heel, a heel manager, or an announcer.

If a wrestler loses a loser-leave-town match, their departure will coincidentally be the same as the arrival of a new masked wrestler who looks and acts remarkably similar to the departed wrestler. However, if anyone attempts to unmask him, his identity is revealed to be a jobber. When the original wrestler returns, the masked wrestler will suddenly leave.






"No one has a beer party at Scott Hall's expense!"
Mr Heel II
Lap cheong








Since: 25.2.02

Since last post: 9 days
Last activity: 4 hours
#28 Posted on
A 400-pound wrestler weighs 500 pounds.

A 15-foot steel cage is 20-feet tall.

No matter where you happen to be in the building, if you are caught on camera walking, you are exactly three minutes (one commercial break) from the entrance ramp.



Eradicator
Kolbasz








Since: 4.1.02
From: Chicago

Since last post: 40 days
Last activity: 40 days
#29 Posted on
Somebody said that the hardest thing in the world to get hit by is a title belt. But they are wrong! The hardest thing to get hit by, or rather have your head hit, is when a nasty heel exposes the viscious Steel Turnbuckle of Doom by taking the padding off, and rams your head into it! When in actuality it looks more like a small metal link to a chain.

Even though a cage match is designed to protect against outside interference, there is almost always outside interference!

A heel will be scared shitless when finding out that he has to take part in, and, or defend a title in said steel cage.

Heels will fake injuries to get out of a match, but will somehow end up getting his ass kicked anyways.



"...the people ran, they ran all right, they ran right to the toilet, pulled their pants down, took one big Hulk-a-CRAP every time you opened your mouth!"
Stephanie
Landjager








Since: 2.1.02
From: Madison, WI

Since last post: 489 days
Last activity: 27 days
#30 Posted on
I would add:

A pregnancy announced on television will not result in the birth of a baby. Rather, it will end in an event that will colossally disappoint the audience.

Despite an abundance of television monitors backstage, the right people are seldom watching them at the right time.

Regular phone calls are private. Important phone calls are broadcast to the audience.

A face being pursued will head to the ring and call out his opponent. A heel being pursued will sneak-attack his opponent and then run.

Steph



I'm going twenty-four hours a day...I can't seem to stop
- "Turn Up The Radio", Autograph
Copaup
Braunschweiger








Since: 18.2.02

Since last post: 4355 days
Last activity: 4346 days
#31 Posted on
If you are a face, you must respond to your opponents "test of strength" even though you know it will result in your being kicked in the gut.

You will always be rewarded with a wave of strength the second time your arm drops while in the sleeper, provided the crowd chants for you.

An open handed slap to the chest is far more painful than a closed fist to the jaw.

If you are Ric Flair, any attempt to climb the top rope will result in an immediate body slam.

Always contact the cameraman before launching your devious plan to kill your opponent.
Yun
Salami








Since: 2.1.02
From: Just outside Dudleyville

Since last post: 3214 days
Last activity: 3162 days
AIM:  
#32 Posted on

    Originally posted by Eradicator
    Somebody said that the hardest thing in the world to get hit by is a title belt. But they are wrong! The hardest thing to get hit by, or rather have your head hit, is when a nasty heel exposes the viscious Steel Turnbuckle of Doom by taking the padding off, and rams your head into it! When in actuality it looks more like a small metal link to a chain.


You're all wrong... the hardest thing in the world to hit is a Samoan's head.

However if the steel bolt is uncovered by the heel the face will block any attempt to be rammed into it. The heel will then completely forget about it until the face rams his head into it.

No matter how many time a move fails the wrestler will always try it at least once per match.

Wrestlers will always shoehorn their catchphrases into perfectly good promos whether they fit or not.

Any "High Risk" maneuver will hurt like hell if missed but can be no-sold with impugnity if they hit (someone already said this about dropkicks but it really applies to all aerial moves.)

Heel stables always want to take over or destroy the company.

A leg injury will often transfer to the other leg for no readily apparant reason.



Everything's cool when you're Yun [point] Cheol [point] Su [point]
Saruman
Salami








Since: 25.1.02
From: Kirksville, MO

Since last post: 4423 days
Last activity: 4394 days
AIM:  
#33 Posted on
"Devestating Knife Edge Chops" don't seem so devestating when you're a face.
Stables always get destroyed from within by the man who formed them.
Moves that normally people would pop right back up from are deadly when performed right before dancing (ie, Scottie's shitty facebuster).
Fat Samoans never win, no matter how many times they're repackaged.
Changing a guy's gimmick but NOT his name will help him get over, but changing a guy's gimmick AND his name will not. (eg: Rocky, HHH, Leif-Al, Oz-VinnieVegas)




Insert clever comment.
ripblazer
Pickled pork








Since: 16.1.02
From: Calgary Alberta Canada

Since last post: 3435 days
Last activity: 3267 days
#34 Posted on
Ike
Salami








Since: 14.2.02
From: Burlington, Ontario

Since last post: 4356 days
Last activity: 4341 days
ICQ:  
#35 Posted on
Well said.
Article 38B - Female Valets

If a face valet is at the mercy of a heel wrestler or tag team, she is likely to have his / their finisher applied to her or have something equally dastartly happen. (See: Boyz, Dudley)

If a heel valet is at the mercy of a face wrestler or tag team, the worst thing that can happen to her is a spanking, de-pantsing or something else to do with her ass. Exceptions are allowed if the valet's heel wrestler attempts to save her, at which point she will get thorougly run over.
SamZim
Cotto








Since: 4.1.02
From: Outside Toledo, for now...

Since last post: 3362 days
Last activity: 3362 days
#36 Posted on
Armwrestling matches and posedowns ALWAYS end badly.



-Sam Zimmerman
Rudy
Polska kielbasa








Since: 3.1.02

Since last post: 4350 days
Last activity: 4339 days
#37 Posted on
This was partly addressed in an earlier post, but there is a complex mathematical formula for determining the "announced height" of an item, usually in regards to something from which a person falls.

If a person falls ten feet, you must multiply it by 1.5

If it's 15 feet, you have to mulitply it by 1.66

Between twenty and thirty feet, you automatically round it up to fifty feet.

Anything over forty feet high is referred not in "feet" buy in "stories" such as "Oh my God! Shane just took a five-story fall onto the Big Show!".


Later, Rudy
ripblazer
Pickled pork








Since: 16.1.02
From: Calgary Alberta Canada

Since last post: 3435 days
Last activity: 3267 days
#38 Posted on
That was literally an unwritten rule in my last post. That, or I hit the enter button too soon.
MonteCarl
Potato korv








Since: 21.1.02
From: Saginaw, MI

Since last post: 206 days
Last activity: 6 days
AIM:  
#39 Posted on
Never EVER sign a contract for your upcoming match in the ring. You will be beat down and left in a bloody heap.

--Monte N
bigwavedave
Blutwurst








Since: 3.1.02
From: morro bay ca

Since last post: 4291 days
Last activity: 4291 days
#40 Posted on
In a tag team match, either oustside partner can run in to stop a 3 count, but only the heel team partner can drag his partner back to their corner for a tag.



"My parents said I could be anything, so I became an ASSHOLE!"
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I saw this in the Dallas Morning News today; I did a double take when I saw the pic. Here's his actual obituary: http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dallasmorningnews/obituary.aspx?n=jimmy-wehba&pid=144858575
- Corajudo, Skandor Akbar passes on (2010)
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