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The W - Pro Wrestling - Total Divas 1x13 "Saying Goodbye" / JOJO!
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JustinShapiro
Scrapple
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Since: 12.12.01
From: Pittsburgh, PA

Since last post: 10 hours
Last activity: 4 hours
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.97
AIN'T GONNA STOP ME NOW

Gismo died. I don't want to talk about it. It was too real. It's not the staged wackiness that makes the show fun.

JoJo Offerman, as I live and breathe. Our sweet little JoJo is back with a vengeance, appearing in three scenes and speaking two lines. Her inclusion was incidental, if not accidental, but at least we know she's okay!

Jon Uso's charisma and reaction shots on this show really make him one of the great babyfaces in wrestling. He goes full-on Eddie Guerrero trying to storm the Playboy mansion gates to confiscate Chyna's pictorial, but in the most artificial fiction lies the deepest truth. Jon doesn't want Trinity to do a (detail-free, seemingly made up just for the conflict of the show) romance angle on WWE TV. After playing overbearing jealous boyfriend for most of the episode, he humbles himself at the end of the show, admitting he's scared that Trinity would fall for someone else if they were in an on-screen romance, citing historical precedent. Aww. FUN FACT, Jon and Trinity have been together since developmental, so their pre-dates predate the Uso debut and NXT Rainfall season in 2010.

Appearing with a speaking role for, oddly, the very first time on the show, is Brodus Clay, only the central purpose of the whole Funkadactyl gimmick. He tried to be too cool for this show but he finally figured out where the power lies. If Tons of Funk are turning to Natural Disasters monster heels, I would actually be in favor of the Funkadactyls joining the Usos as opposed to Xavier Woods. And not just for what would be an immensely complicated ring entrance. They would be a multi-ethnic London & Kendrick & Ashley for the modern day.

A.J. also appears in clips from her heel commentary in the build-up to Night of Champions, but her big promo was left on the cutting room floor since this story ended up being about Brie calling Nikki a freeloader for being injured for so long while she's been taking all the bumps and improving in-ring. There's a moment where Nikki says "that wasn't the deal, dumb-dumb" and pats her sister on the head that I hope will find gif immortality.

Creepy Mark Carrano seems to have totally jojo'd Jane Geddes for her spot as the general manager of Total Divas.

At the end of the episode, I guess Brie outs her mother for also having implants? Wait, what?

Next week's clips for the finale are tantalizing, with a primal scream of "BRIIIIIIIIIIIIE MOOOOOOODE" and Eva Marie's father Evan Marie Sr. bellowing NO! at her long-lost fiance.

(edited by JustinShapiro on 9.12.13 1916)
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John Orquiola
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Since: 28.2.02
From: Boston

Since last post: 124 days
Last activity: 124 days
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.31
Apparently, Jon Uso got his wish anyway since no love interest storyline for Trinity/Naomi ever materialized. Unless it's happening on the shows I don't watch, Superstars and Main Event.

Brodus appears! But my favorite segment was when Nattie and TJ were talking backstage and Fandango wandered into frame, saw the Total Divas camera, and sashayed right out of frame. He must have smartened up about nothing good happening for him when Total Divas cameras are aimed in his direction.

Somehow, Nikki took Mark telling her she won't be going out to the ring for Night of Champions with Brie as instruction to remove her matching candy Bella outfit and return to her street clothes.

Nikki's rampant paranoia returned about how she'll be forgotten by Creative if she's away from TV for too long. Despite the fact that they already knew Total Divas was a hit when these episodes were filmed, even John Cena is so paranoid that being off TV = forgotten that Nikki can't help but be consumed by that same fear. The Future Endeavoring Sword of Damocles hangs over the head of every WWE superstar and Diva, no matter how successful. That terror is so deeply ingrained in the employees of that company.

My idea of Hell would be if I were to die and get reincarnated as a cat owned by Nattie and TJ. RIP Gizmo.

(edited by John Orquiola on 9.12.13 1625)
CruelAngel777
Frankfurter








Since: 7.4.02

Since last post: 2 hours
Last activity: 2 hours
#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.79
I don't know the name of that breed of kitten that Tyson brought home, but If I was stuck with those chodes I'd make that face forever too. I would feel for Nattie but fuck that noise..

JoJo is back! Yeah JoJoMania runnin' wil...annnnnd she's gone. Well I got my request I guess?

No one likes The Bellas. This show doesn't help them. They start off as overpushed twins that can't wrestle, somehow win the Diva's Title without actually improving in the ring, suddenly leave the company together (as if they can't work without the other ever), return and allegedly jeopardizes former Diva's from returning to WWE, then they get this show where they bicker amongst each other, and love their men one minute then turn around and bite their heads off the next.

The damage has been done to The Bellas cred in the WWE, pull the plug and just make them valets already. When Eva Marie and JOJO get a stronger reaction than either of them in the ring, it's looking bad for Twin Magic.



I believe in The Shield....
Moss
Summer sausage








Since: 23.9.10
From: Calgary, AB

Since last post: 17 days
Last activity: 18 hours
#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.12
So finally...The Orq is back...to watching Total Divas?

    Originally posted by JustinShapiro
    Next week's clips for the finale are tantalizing, with a primal scream of "BRIIIIIIIIIIIIE MOOOOOOODE" and Eva Marie's father Evan Marie Sr. bellowing NO! at her long-lost fiance.


You're forgetting the best part- Nattie drunk dialing Steph-O-Mac. Since she's getting a title match this Sunday I'm guessing it doesn't go "dream journal" bad for her.

As a pet owner the Gizmo stuff is emotional. Gotta love the reality show editing making it look like Nattie gets upset about what TJ brings home.

Sandra needs to accompany the Divas to all their functions.



BORK LASER PLS
John Orquiola
Scrapple








Since: 28.2.02
From: Boston

Since last post: 124 days
Last activity: 124 days
#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.31
    Originally posted by Moss
    So finally...The Orq is back...to watching Total Divas?


I never stopped. I just don't want to talk about it so much. Justin's better suited to this gig. He's thebomb.com.


    No one likes The Bellas. This show doesn't help them. They start off as overpushed twins that can't wrestle, somehow win the Diva's Title without actually improving in the ring, suddenly leave the company together (as if they can't work without the other ever), return and allegedly jeopardizes former Diva's from returning to WWE, then they get this show where they bicker amongst each other, and love their men one minute then turn around and bite their heads off the next.

    The damage has been done to The Bellas cred in the WWE, pull the plug and just make them valets already. When Eva Marie and JOJO get a stronger reaction than either of them in the ring, it's looking bad for Twin Magic.


Yeah, whatever. Haters gonna hate. Bella gonna win Slammys... somehow.

You're referring to Total Divas not helping the cause of the Bellas being made popular by fans within the so-called WWE Universe, apparently. But I already know a number of people, females mostly, who do watch Total Divas on E! and like the Bellas but do not watch WWE programming. They're aware of it, their significant others watch it (and actually, don't like the Bellas), but they don't watch RAW but do watch Total Divas on E and like the show. However, this separate Total Divas audience from the RAW audience likely does not use the WWE App, so that still doesn't explain how the Bellas won Diva of the Year. This mystery will haunt me to the end of my days.

EDIT: Stuff like this (okmagazine.com) thanks to Total Divas' popularity makes the Bellas valuable to WWE in a way even AJ isn't (and doesn't want to be).

(edited by John Orquiola on 11.12.13 1137)
Ecks
Chourico








Since: 18.7.02
From: Brantford, Ontario, Canada

Since last post: 4 days
Last activity: 14 hours
#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.98
Is it just me, or does Nikki grab her breasts all the time?
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How is he? I have never seen him wrestle and he is coming to Houston next week for an indy show. I have seen the indy shows this group has put on before.
- dskillz, New Jack? (2002)
Related threads: Total Divas 1x12 "Get That Chingle Chingle" - Total Divas 1x11 "Seeing Red" / "Fuckadactyl" - Total Divas 1x10 "Nurse Nikki" / "Ginger Mahal" - More...
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