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The W - Pro Wrestling - TNA Impact 5.28.09 - "Shake Up WIthin the Ranks"
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used2bcool
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Since: 5.11.08
From: Lake Forest, IL

Since last post: 1 day
Last activity: 10 hours
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.56
The Recap for TNA Impact 5.28.09 from the Impact Zone in Orlando, FL.

- The sun rises from the West, hell freezes over, and TNA Impact begins with a match!

Match 1: Suicide over Amazing Red via Suicide Solution in 5 minutes. I'm not gonna bitch about the perennial selling issues, but just enjoy the fast-paced, bell-to-bell action. **3/4 on the PES. The crowd was definitely into it.

- The MEM, upset because their usual promo at the top of the show was usurped by...*gasp* a match, head to the ring. Sting says that since he is in charge, there are going to be changes. Angle is obviously upset. He mentions how the original reason for founding the Mafia was to bring respect back to TNA, and implies that they've strayed off this path due to Angle. He wonders if the rest of the Mafia has lived up to the original promise. Time for some introspection, is it? He says Jenna Morasca and Sharmelle are a distraction and hence are no longer a part of the MEM, which caused Booker and Nash to throw a collective fit. He then fires MEM security! Oh, noes! I know Karlos is gonna be upset at this. No more Sal E Boy and Rocco! That serves to piss Angle off. Sting asys if anyone has a problem, they need to bring it to the fore now, which brings out Samoa Joe. I thought he was talking about intra-Mafia problems. Oh, well. Joe says he's gonna take them out one by one until only Angle is left. And then he's gonna kill Angle! Why, you ask? Because that's what his orders say. INTRIGUE~! In all seriousness, though, this was going on nicely until Joe came out with his stupid threats again. I bet Joe's driver is also his Higher Power. Remember that debacle?

- Backstage, Foley is with JB. He tells him to put a "Jeff Jarrett, Founder" sign for sale at Twitter. But why? Jarrett lost nothing at Sacrifice. Foley announces JJ v EY and AJ v CD (ok, ok, Daniels) as King of the Mountain qualifiers tonight. Poor Daniels.

- JB talks to the British Invasion, who take offense when he mentions that they stole the Feast-or-Fired briefcases from LAX. They've only *borrowed* them, dammit! Williams says everyone will get a chance to get their briefcases back, including a ladder match tonight. JB then asks about his unholy England-Iran-Japan alliance, and Williams pretends not to know anything about it. Make this man a diplomat! He's cut out for it.

- Lauren talks to Jenna Morasca, who wonders why Sharmelle would be mad at her. She says if she didn't throw the towel at Sacrifice, Booker would be missing an arm today. Sharmelle fails to see her (actually valid) point and tries to choke her out, though.

- Lauren wants a word with Sojo Bolt, but Dr. Stevie cuts her off. They take turns calling each other a joke, but nothing really comes off it. Stevie claims to have mind control over Abyss. Wonder where it was while Stevie was being chokeslammed into those tacks at Sacrifice. He tells Lauren to make an appointment.

Ladder Match: Doug Williams over Cody Deaner via briefcase retrieval in 5 minutes. Well, that was a short ladder match. West - "Deaner is an example of why you don't do crystal meth." True dat. Deaner took a pretty sick bump at the finish. ** on the PES. Morale of the story: beat up the briefcase holder, then give chances to *somebody completely unrelated* to get the briefcase, win said chances, and you're the legitimate holder! Voila.

- JB is with JJ. I love this scenario because it allows me to describe it fully by using only initials. JB says EY might be up to something with all his complaints. Yes, JB, it's called "heel turn." JJ said he'll pay attention to him in the ring tonight. JB asks about what happened at the TNA HQ, but JJ is too upset to dignify that with a response.

- Dr. Stevie calls out Abyss. He says everyone has an addiction, and theirs is an addiction to violence. He says the only difference is that Stevie is civilized while Abyss is unfit for society. I think having a self-proclaimed "addiction to violence" pretty much disqualifies you from civilization, Stevie. Stevie wants Abyss to wear a strait-jacket, but Abyss won't have any of it. Stevie goes the parental route with "this is gonna hurt me a lot more than it will hurt you," to prelude a kendo-stick induced beating, but Lauren comes out to protest. Stevie goes after her, prompting the return of Raven. But then Raven pops Abyss with the Kendo Stick. SWERVE~! Stevie says he's sorry, but that's it for this week. Raven and Stevie hug, while Lauren vents her hatred towards Stevie.

Match 3: Angelina Love over Sojo Bolt in 3 minutes via Lights Out. Decent enough match, and I love Angie as the champ, so this gets *3/4 on the PES. Postmatch, Angie fires Kip for failing to take care of Kong, and reiterates her dominance over the Knockouts division. Her arrogance leads to her ruin, however, as she makes Standard Heel Mistake # 28: Laying Out an Open Challenge. It is of course answered by Lisa Marie Varon , as Mathew Sforcena is having the time of his life somewhere in Australia. Widows Peak! Vicki says the challenge is accepted. (I just can't come to call her LMV).

- JB is with EY backstage. EY - "What about me?" JB wonders if EY was harsh on JJ. EY says that TNA come to him when they need something, but when he needs something, they're nowhere to be found. He promises JJ that he will not forget tonight.

- JB is with the Motor City Machine Guns and Lethal Consequences, who apparently have joined forces to find out just who Suicide is. So does that make MCMG faces, LC heels, or much worse, both tweeners?

- The Hardcore Leopard heads to the ring to discuss what's on his mind. FOley says it was a tough week for him as he retained his title despite overwhelming odds. He makes Joe v Nash in Lethal Lcokdown for next week. Foley says he has a dilemma, he wants to be champ for years, but he can't go on overcoming overwhleming odds on a monthly basis. So he has a solution: defend the title only once a year after Slammiversary. Whoa! Lethal Lockdown next week? That's like having the Elimination Chamber on an episode of Superstars.

- JB is with AJ Styles and Daniels. Styles puts over TNA, which is interrupted by Joe, who wants to hug and make up. AJ says after the match, he'll look into it.

Match 4: Jeff Jarrett over Eric Young via rollup in 4 minutes to qualify for KotM. Postmatch, EY extends his hand to JJ, who takes it after hesitation. He then turns to celebrate. WRONG! EY attacks from behind, going after the hammy and landing a top-rope elbow. Match was nothing spectacular, but postmatch bumps this up to *** on the PES.

- JB talks to EY. EY says JJ won't forget about him again. Excellent turn.

- Team 3D head out for the trophy presentation. Ray puts over Beer Money and says all TNA fans are proud of them, just as Ray is proud of working in the company that has the strongest tag division in the world today. Beer Money come out to accept the trophy and the check ("That's a lot of beer" - Impact Zone), and Roode thanks 3D for allowing them to prove the that they were the best team in the world today. He says if 3D are not convinced, they will prove it to them at Slammiversary. Ray pours beer in the trophy and good times are had by all. RESPECT~.

Match 5: AJ Styles over Daniels via rollup in 9 minutes. Nice little TV match, and the finish came when Styles rolled through the Angel's Wings. Let's go ***1/4 on the PES. Postmatch, Shane Douglas attacks Daniels with a chain and disappears through the crowd, just as he had appeared. AJ checks on Daniels. No Samoa Joe? Maybe that's next week.

- End Show.
Wrestling Counter: 26 minutes.

--> A solid show and a good recovery from the horrendous show we were treated to last week. The returns were all well done and in intriguing storylines, though I do not understand why TNA would leak these big returns on their mobile hotline. The treatment of AJ Styles in the main event was also nice, with the band playing him down making him look like a big deal. I was into all the in-ring action offered this week. This show promised a shake-up and it delivered on the MEM front - the Sting interview was a much-needed fresh perspective on a storyline starting to get old. The fallout from Sacrifice, and the Foley interview in particular did a fine job and adding nuances to the existing characters. I was also impressed by the excellent heel turn by EY. So not much to gripe about this week, let's go with ***1/2 for a solid show this week.




Forfeit the game, before somebody else takes you outta the game, and puts your name to shame
Cover up your face, you can't run the race
The pace is too fast, you just won't last
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Karlos the Jackal
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Since: 2.1.02
From: The City of Subdued Excitement

Since last post: 15 days
Last activity: 12 hours
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.00
    Originally posted by used2bcool
    He then fires MEM security! Oh, noes! I know Karlos is gonna be upset at this. No more Sal E Boy and Rocco!
Ha ha, yeah; I'm upset, all right, if this results in a Sally and Rocco face turn and a push to the top of the tag division. Let's all close our eyes and imagine a Security Force / Team 3D tag match...

Hey, how come THEY had to leave, but Jenna and Sharmelle got to stay in the ring looking all pouty?

    Originally posted by u2bc
    In all seriousness, though, this was going on nicely until Joe came out with his stupid threats again.
I thought the threats were fine -- although we've heard 'em all before, and didn't Joe DESTROY Nash just like five days ago? -- up until the "I'm actually going to kill you, Kurt, like actually-dead-killed" part, because I really suspect that's not going to happen, which means that Joe is talking shit that he won't be able to back up.

(Although it would be awesome if Kurt's contract was up and he was headed back to WWE, and he ended his TNA run by getting "killed" by Joe -- and no matter what, from then on TNA would always insist that Kurt was actually dead, murdered by Samoa Joe.)

    Originally posted by u2bc
    Ladder Match: Doug Williams over Cody Deaner via briefcase retrieval in 5 minutes. Well, that was a short ladder match. West - "Deaner is an example of why you don't do crystal meth." True dat. Deaner took a pretty sick bump at the finish.
Short, but enjoyable. That last bump was crazy -- Deaner looked like he was going for a stop-your-fall-with-your-foot move, a la Christian Cage, but instead he fell, hit the ropes with the side of his abdomen, and flipped over to the floor. At first I thought he screwed up, but his fall looked pretty controlled and it seemed to be the actual ending. I am happy to see them doing something with Deaner (other than awful skits).

Speaking of new guys -- OMG Sailor Jesse Neal is going to debut next week! I predict that he is going to be the blandest, dullest vanilla babyface in the world. I think the best thing to do at this point is team him with his "trainer" Rhino and stick 'em in the tag division. Hey, their team, "Rhino/Neal," can have finishers like "The Barry Lyndon" and "The Paper Moon." Or at least "The Driver." C'mon, people, work with me, here.

    Originally posted by u2bc
    Morale of the story: beat up the briefcase holder, then give chances to *somebody completely unrelated* to get the briefcase, win said chances, and you're the legitimate holder! Voila.
The British Invasion, by the way, is awesome. Brutus Magnus has some really great facial expressions.

    Originally posted by u2bc
    But then Raven pops Abyss with the Kendo Stick.
And here is where, in an increasingly common occurrence, Don West got the Line of the Night, as Raven was beating Abyss into the mat with the kendo stick. Tenay: "ANOTHER shot with the stick!" West: "The mental healing, though, has started."

Lisa Marie Varon, hooray! Although they only referred to her as "Victoria," I think. Varon vs. Kong is just about the closest thing to a "Dream Match" that TNA has right now, I think.

I'm going to predict that EY's heel turn will fail to ignite my interest in him, and I'm not sure what good it's going to do him -- even as a heel, what is there for him to do? If anything, there's even less room for upward mobility on the heel side of the roster.

I am astounded that the trophy presentation went off as planned.

    Originally posted by u2bc
    Nice little TV match, and the finish came when Styles rolled through the Angel's Wings.
Fun match, and the ending was even cooler than you make it sound -- Daniels countered a Styles Clash into the Angel's Wings, which Styles then -- somehow -- counter-countered into a huracanrana rollup. Sweet!

As for Shane Douglas -- huh. What's his beef? I know that the team of Daniels and Styles beat the Naturals when Douglas was managing them, but I can't imagine that he's been holding a grudge about that for the last few years.


    Originally posted by u2bc
    The returns were all well done and in intriguing storylines, though I do not understand why TNA would leak these big returns on their mobile hotline.
Well, why not? The shows are pre-taped; everyone with an internet knew about these folks coming in anyway. Might as well us 'em to push the hotline as a source for breaking news and try and get some TV ratings in the process.

I agree with you that it was a solid show. I was surprised at how low the Wrestling Counter was; it felt like more to me. Maybe because most of the talky talky took place in the ring instead of backstage?

Next Thursday I'll be out of town -- at a TNA house show!

--K



Last 5 movies seen: Paul Blart: Mall Cop **1/2 - Last Chance Harvey *** - Doubt **** - Burn After Reading n/a - The Princess Bride n/a
Quezzy
Knackwurst








Since: 6.1.02
From: Pittsburgh, PA

Since last post: 2 days
Last activity: 8 hours
#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.53
I thought this was a pretty good show. The MEM interview was great and so was the Styles/Daniels/Joe encounter. Both teams look like they want to get their act together.

I actually liked EY's promo backstage and liked the attack fine but there is just something about the way that he wrestles that I don't think I could ever see him as a heel. I wonder if this would've been a better spot for Jay Lethal to dump the Savage gimmick and turn heel or maybe turn Rhino heel. I know neither of them have the history with Jarrett, but like anybody cares about EY and JJ's history anyway.

Raven's return might be alright if he sticks with Stevie and they don't do much other than beating people up with weapons but if Shane's attack on Daniels means they are going to feud and have a match then we could be in trouble.

When I saw Styles vs. Daniels for a shot in the King of the Mountain match I was bummed that meant one of them (Daniels) was not going to be in it but I liked that the announcers explained that Foley probably put Styles and Daniels against each other on purpose to eliminate one of them from being in the King of the Mountain. That was a nice touch.

Daniels-Styles was about as good as a 9-minute-free-tv-with-a-commercial-break-in-the-middle-match could be. Unfortunately it was a 9-minute-free-tv-with-a-commercial-break-in-the-middle-match.

I'm disappointed that Steiner didn't get to talk this week.

Favorite line of the night (Also by Don West) came when Abyss was in the straight jacket, Stevie pulls out the kendo stick and Tenay is going on about how awful this is and West says something like, "it's ONLY a kendo stick, it's not like it's a baseball bat."



Lance's Response:

THAT IS AWESOME!
Peter The Hegemon
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Since: 11.2.03
From: Hackettstown, NJ

Since last post: 8 hours
Last activity: 6 hours
#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.03
    Originally posted by Karlos the Jackal

    Speaking of new guys -- OMG Sailor Jesse Neal is going to debut next week! I predict that he is going to be the blandest, dullest vanilla babyface in the world. I think the best thing to do at this point is team him with his "trainer" Rhino and stick 'em in the tag division. Hey, their team, "Rhino/Neal," can have finishers like "The Barry Lyndon" and "The Paper Moon." Or at least "The Driver." C'mon, people, work with me, here.


Bwahaha! Being in a tag team with Rhino means never having to say you're sorry. A sorry excuse for a face, that is. B^)

I'm guessing the point of Joe saying he's going to kill Angle is to get people to chant his chant again. But you're right; it looks bad when a face, especially a badass face, promises something he can't deliver. (Granted Joe hasn't been acting all that face-ish, but clearly he's the face vs. Angle.)

Sting is now a face leader of a heel faction. I'm not sure how well that can work, but at least it's fairly original.
kentish
Andouille








Since: 19.8.05
From: My Old Kentucky Home

Since last post: 43 days
Last activity: 4 days
#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.63
I liked that they seemed to move in new directions last night, but I amount sure Raven and Shane are the guys to help do it. Victoria, on the other hand, is a great addition to the roster for veteran leadership.

I was SHOCKED that Beer money did not waffle 3D with the trophy! Are they actually faces now??




"I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ."

-- Mahatma Gandhi
geemoney
Scrapple








Since: 26.1.03
From: Naples, FL

Since last post: 2 days
Last activity: 9 hours
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#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.71
    Originally posted by used2bcool
    Morale of the story: beat up the briefcase holder, then give chances to *somebody completely unrelated* to get the briefcase, win said chances, and you're the legitimate holder! Voila.


That's what I really hated about the show. Why would TNA management allow them to put briefcases they don’t even own on the line? And if you stole them, what do you have to gain by putting them on the line in a match? Just really takes you out of the moment when they do stupid stuff like this.
monkaaman
Weisswurst








Since: 13.5.09
From: Jungle

Since last post: 1680 days
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#7 Posted on
So Dr. Stevie gets the best wrestler he's ever worked with back and his former love interest back on the same show. Raven. And Lisa Marie Varon was on the show too.
dWs
Chorizo








Since: 26.2.09
From: Humpty Doo, Australia

Since last post: 42 days
Last activity: 22 hours
#8 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.06
    Originally posted by used2bcool

    - Backstage, Foley is with JB. He tells him to put a "Jeff Jarrett, Founder" sign for sale at Twitter.


Dumb question, and I'm not a Twitter follower, but do people really SELL stuff on there? I'm thinking "eBay" or "Craigslist" would've been a better punchline and Foley's just trying to be "hip and cool" because he saw the word Twitter in an airline magazine. Or am I deluded?



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Since: 9.12.01
From: ミネアポリス

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#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.51
    Originally posted by monkaaman
    So Dr. Stevie gets the best wrestler he's ever worked with back and his former love interest back on the same show. Raven. And Lisa Marie Varon was on the show too.
I think there's a very funny joke in what you're saying up there, but it needs some editing. :)



lotjx
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Since: 5.9.08

Since last post: 13 hours
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#10 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.15
I got the replay this weekend. I liked how they are moving the show away from Kong to other fresher feuds for the Beautiful people. Hopefully Slammiversary will end the speculation who Joe's voice is and end his on-going feud with MEM.
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You two are nutty. That women's match was GREAT.
- Amos Cochran, NXT TakeOver (2014)
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