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30.8.14 1937
The W - Pro Wrestling - TNA Impact 5.13.2010 - Three Tickets to Sacrifice
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used2bcool
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Since: 5.11.08
From: Lake Forest, IL

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#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.88
Recap for TNA Impact 5.13.2010, taped from Orlando, FL.

- We get the highlights from last week's pathetic excuse for a main event and then Taz and Tenay open the show, hyping the online contender's list.

- Eric Bischoff heads down to the ring to tell the fans how much he really loves all of them. He brings out "Mr. TNA" Rob Van Dam. RVD, as usual, takes a long time posing. After all that, Bischoff hypes the contender's list and says half a million people voted. And did you really listen to them, Eric? Bischoff says the poll threw up some interesting information, and this week it will be Jeff Hardy facing RVD for the title. Unfortunately no one can find Hardy, so RVD will have the night off. Ok then. RVD says he enjoys being the champ, defending his title, proving he's the best, and popping ratings. AJ Styles takes offense to that and tells RVD that he should aim to be a role model like AJ is. AJ shuts up Bischoff and asks Rob if he wants to wrestle, because AJ's in the mood to hurt someone. AJ says these people here came to see him and not Rob. It's gonna be AJ v Rob for later, and AJ's gonna break Rob's leg so it will be a cakewalk for him to take the title back at Sacrifice. That brings out Jeff Hardy. Really, how pathetic are Bischoff's people that they couldn't find him? He was right there! He says he's ready for the match tonight, but AJ says there's already a match tonight and it has nothing to do with Jeff. "Why don't you go and paint a picture or something?" Win! That made the segment for me. Jeff proposes a 3-way, and Bischoff makes it official. AJ is less than pleased. This didn't need Bischoff out there, but I'll let that slide. 1 for 1.

- JB is backstage with The Beautiful People. Rayne has a match at Sacrifice against Tara and she says Tara needs to get used to not having the title. At Sacrifice, Rayne will prove to everyone that she deserves the title. Lacey runs away to go pee. WTF, mate? The hype was fine, but what the hell was that at the end?

Match 1: Tara over Taylor Wilde via Kick to the Gut in 2 minutes. Shitty match, shitty finish. Crowd didn't care. Postmatch, Tara beats up Taylor with her knee brace until Sarita makes the save. 1 for 2.

- Backstage, a bunch of people are huddled around Chelsea and Des Wolfe, with Wolfe telling the cameras to give them space. Chelsea seems to be crying. Christy Hemme says that she's talking to the police but no one knows what's going on. INTRIGUE~!

- Doug Williams is out to tell Brian Kendrick that he's a crazy loser and undeserving of a title shot. Announcers quickly explain that Williams is actually not champ and just has the belt. This leads to...
Match 2: Brian Kendrick over Doug Williams via rollup after Kazarian-ference in 3 minutes. Impact Special (tm)! I like both guys but this was a nothing match. 1 for 3.

- Backstage, Christy Hemme pulls aside an agent to get an update on the Chelsea thing. He says he's not sure, but he can't believe what he's just heard. Christy claims to know the name of the attacker and will be standing by. More INTRIGUE~!

Match 3: TNA Tag Titles: Matt Morgan and Generation Me fought to a No-contest via Sportz Entertainment Finish(tm) in about a minute. Morgan destroyed Gen Me and asked Hogan if he still thinks "we" are playing. I love this trait in Morgan's character. Morgan promises bloodshed and prepares to kill Jeremy (I think), but Samoa Joe makes the save and wipes him out with the Muscle Buster.

- Nash has a Feast or Fired briefcase for a tag title shot! Damn, I had forgotten about that. He and Hall are cashing it in!
Match 4: TNA Tag Titles: Kevin Nash and Scott Hall over Matt Morgan via Pin in less than 10 seconds. Postmatch, The Band posed with the titles and Young ran laps around the ring. Hall and Nash acted tired from the "match." Hall probably is. The whole segment was a trainwreck, but in a passably good way. 2 for 4.

- Backstage, Shannon Moore and Jesse Neal discuss their match at Sacrifice and remind us that it's all about the tag titles. I have to note at this point that Ink Inc. is an absolutely god-forsaken horrendous name.

Match 5: Ink Inc. over Beer Money, Team 3D, and the Motor City Machine Guns in a 4-way Tag Match (Neal pins Ray - Mooregasm and Spear) in 7 minutes. Solid action and it does a nice job of building up the number-1 contenders for the PPV. 3 for 5.

- Flair is backstage and he claims that there is dissension between Hardy and RVD. He says he may be banned from ringside, but AJ doesn't need him. He guarantees that RVD will be limping this Sunday. Elsewhere, RVD walks into a room where Hardy is putting on makeup. Hardy thanks him for the match and RVD asks if he can imagine how loud the fans are gonna be. They play nice to each other. Decent enough when you combine the two segments. 4 for 6.

Match 6: TNA Global Title: Rob Terry vs Abyss never happened. Because Abyss was getting handcuffed in the back. Abyss claims innocence and asks for Dixie or Hulk. Wolfe takes a shot at him before the agent from earlier pulls him off and holds him back. Hogan comes out to tell him everything's gonna be ok. The policemen want Abyss to take off the mask, so Hogan asks the camera to get out of there. He unmasks him off-camera and puts on a hood and they drive him away. 4 for 7.

- Ringside, the announcers tell us that Abyss is charged with assault. Terry is still in the ring, allowing Orlando Jordan to attack and low blow him, and then wipe him out with a pipe shot. He leaves a card that says "The Wild Card." Really? A card? What is he, The Joker? Post-break, Jordan is still in the ring. He says the foreplay is over. So I have to watch him wrestle now? Oh, joy. He says he's the Wild Card of TNA. That gets no reaction. He asks if the fans want him to leave. Yes! But they have to let him fulfil their every fantasy. Zuh? So he issues an open challenge. So apparently my fantasy involves watching Orlando v Tomko. Wow. 4 for 8.

Match 6: Orlando Jordan over Tomko via Guillotine Choke and referee stoppage in 3 minutes. Jordan accidentally slipped off his chokehold and had to reapply it. This match blows. 4 for 9.

- Backstage, Hogan knows that Abyss hasn't done anything. Lacey comes in and tells him it's all a big mistake and hands him what looks like an IPhone. Elsewhere, Bischoff orders Tara to wrestle Sarita right now.

Match 7: Tara over Sarita via Knee-Brace shot in 1 minute. Moving on. 4 for 10.

Match 8: Non-title: AJ Styles over RVD and Jeff Hardy when he pinned RVD after a DDT on the outside in 6 minutes. Disjointed, disappointing main event. 4 for 11. Post match, Jeff Hardy called out Mr. Anderson and they brawled into the break. After the break, Hardy put Anderson through a table with a Swanton Bomb.

- The footage that Lacey shot earlier reveals (obviously) that Wolfe and Chelsea set Abyss up. Duh. The announcers make a big deal of it, but I think it could've been figured out by anyone who's watched more than three shows of TNA. They push the PPV and we're finally done. 4 for 12.

Wrestling Counter: 23 minutes.

Score: 4 for 12: I understand the need to push the PPV at the expense of the matches sometimes, but this show was mostly terrible from top-to-bottom. When you find it a huge drag to sit through the show, it's hard to get excited for the PPV coming up. This show is a double failure, a special DUD, terrible in its execution, and terrible as a go-home show.



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AlbySure
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Since: 10.12.01
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#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.01
Where's the Pope?
Karlos the Jackal
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#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.00
    Originally posted by AlbySure
    Where's the Pope?
Injured, or "injured."

I thought the show was not too bad, although I skimmed everything that wasn't in the ring.

Worst part was the Chelsea / Abyss angle, which continued through the entire show and ended up exactly where we started.

Well -- with the exception that it was Lacey Von Erich who came to Abyss' rescue, which is a weird choice. Are they turning her face? I think they are. Here's my prediction: Angelina Love goes heel and rejoins the Beautiful People, turfing out Von Erich. Von Erich goes on to fill the #1 Face spot vacated by Tara.

Speaking of Tara, is she actually leaving? I hate to be the boy who cried work, but I wonder if she's going to end up winning the title from Rayne and staying on after all. Otherwise, I'm not sure I see the point of having her go over -- with ease -- two of the only viable faces left in the division in one night. Ah, I'm sure TNA has their well-thought-out reasons.

I am looking forward to the Jordan/Terry match for no very good reason. It may be worse than Tomko/Richards from Unforgiven!

I agree that Ink Inc. is not a good name, but still I'm fond of tag teams. I find that much of the time they can take two singles wrestlers that I could not possibly care less about and put them together, give them a name and a look and a double-team finisher, and I'll like them just fine. (This usually doesn't work for me when it's just two guys who don't get a team name or anything, like Morgan and Hernandez, for instance.)

About that Mooregasm/Spear double-team finisher of Ink Inc.'s: It's still not actually a double-team move, but if they're going to stick with it -- Neal learned the Spear from Rhino, right? So the finisher should be called the Goregasm!

Main Event match was alright, I thought, u2bc's "miss" notwithstanding -- although he's right that it felt dijointed. Ending was fun, with Styles diving onto everyone (including Anderson) on the outside and then DDTing RVD on the ringside mat.

So yeah. Not particularly inspiring, but pretty far from "terrible." But, again, I FFWD a lot.

--K

(edited by Karlos the Jackal on 14.5.10 0315)


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John Orquiola
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Since: 28.2.02
From: Boston

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#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.62
    Originally posted by Karlos the Jackal
    Speaking of Tara, is she actually leaving? I hate to be the boy who cried work, but I wonder if she's going to end up winning the title from Rayne and staying on after all. Otherwise, I'm not sure I see the point of having her go over -- with ease -- two of the only viable faces left in the division in one night. Ah, I'm sure TNA has their well-thought-out reasons.


Well, not that I'm advocating TNA Creative, you see, but if she's got a title shot at the next pay per view (even if the news of her likely/possible/we'll see impending departure from the company is out on the Interwebs), she still has to be booked like she could win the title back and stay after all. Otherwise, the outcome is moot. There has to be some perceived possibility that Tara could beat Rayne and stay in TNA. Again, I'm not defending Tara squishy squashing the two "viable faces left" in two minutes combined, just that the basic idea behind booking Tara strong going into Sunday is sound.

Then again, I thought Lacey Von Erich needing to pee was the best part of the show, which should indicate where my regard for TNA's Creative currently stands.

(edited by John Orquiola on 14.5.10 0641)

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ekedolphin
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Since: 12.1.02
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#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.36
Good God. The Outsiders winning tag-team titles in 2010?



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graves9
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Since: 19.2.10
From: Brooklyn NY

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#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.22
    Originally posted by ekedolphin
    Good God. The Outsiders winning tag-team titles in 2010?
Almost as bad as Vince Russo booking in 2010.
kentish
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Since: 19.8.05
From: My Old Kentucky Home

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#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.83
Speaking of the Gore, is Rhino still with the company?




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graves9
Landjager








Since: 19.2.10
From: Brooklyn NY

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#8 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.22
Glad I missed the majority of the show. It's too bad I watched the Vince Russo of Baseball(Jerry Manuel) costing my team another game. To get back on topic gotta love giving away another big Match and giving it five minutes. The Outsiders won the tag titles a month or two later than I expected. I rather go to a Lady Gaga concert than see Jordan wrestle Terry.

(edited by graves9 on 14.5.10 1039)
wannaberockstar
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Since: 7.3.02
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#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.76
    Originally posted by graves9
      Originally posted by ekedolphin
      Good God. The Outsiders winning tag-team titles in 2010?
    Almost as bad as Vince Russo booking in 2010.


Well at least Hogan isn't in the main event scene in 2010.

Oh, wait.

Impact was an "eh" show for me but certainly better then the one they had last Monday.

I'm never a big fan of "whodunit" angles like this - why can't we just build up a feud, oh I don't know, IN THE RING? By the way, knowing Russo, do you think he'll change the Abyss/Wolfe match at Sacrifice to be a "Chelsea-and-the-Ring-on-a-pole" match?

I also think it's kind of ridiculous that Abyss seems to be more concerned with the fact that they'll take off is mask rather then the fact that he's being arrested for assaulting a woman.

Hopefully after Sacrifice, once Tara leaves (if the rumours are true), we can kick start the Knockouts division with some fresh faces. I can't believe how much it's dwindled in the past few months. It's really criminal how they're using Sarita.

The tag team match was good (the actual tag team match!) even if it did depress me a bit knowing that the tag team belts had gone to Hall and Nash when teams like the MCMG's and Beer Money are on the roster (and Generation Me are being used as fodder for Matt Morgan).

Loved the Williams/Kendrick match even if it was painfully short. I'm perplexed about why Williams would bring the belt out with him knowing that people are going to just try and take it back.

I'm pretending the Orlando Jordan stuff didn't happen (though I did chuckle at Tenay commenting that Tomko was looking to stop Jordan's momentum in TNA. Has he even had a match before tonight?)

The main event was good, for what it's worth even if we did see another "fist of doom" from Hogan towards the end. Wasn't the best that we've seen but at least it was longer then 3 minutes. That's something. I'm not sure if I like RVD as champion if they're just going to throw him out against random challengers on each Impact. I mean I know he can have good matches but I just don't feel like the buildup for the AJ/RVD match has meant anything besides the typical "you have my belt and I want it back" sort of thing.

The show should have ended with the Hardy Swanton, IMO.

Actually, it SHOULD HAVE ended with something involving RVD and AJ since they're going to be in the main event at Sacrifice fighting for the World Title but at least it would have been better ending it with a sports entertainment segment featuring a grainy iPhone video showing us something that was more obvious then Eric Young's heel turn last week.
Psycho Penguin
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Since: 24.6.07
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#10 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.04
So they spend weeks building Ink Inc vs Matt Morgan and then they hot shot the titles to The Outsiders three days before the PPV so they can have Ink Inc vs The Outsiders at the PPV now? Or did I miss something? Otherwise that booking confuses me.


    I'm pretending the Orlando Jordan stuff didn't happen (though I did chuckle at Tenay commenting that Tomko was looking to stop Jordan's momentum in TNA. Has he even had a match before tonight?)


I remember he beat Samoa Joe on an Impact a while back, early into his run. Don't think he's had any others though.

(edited by Psycho Penguin on 14.5.10 1322)


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graves9
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Since: 19.2.10
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#11 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.22
Forgot to mention but Tomko looks terrible. No wonder Vince soured on him after seeing him in a dark Match a year or so ago. He was released shortly after now we see why. Amazing how far he's fallen when he looked like a breakout star back in late '07 early '08.

(edited by graves9 on 14.5.10 1327)

(edited by graves9 on 14.5.10 1327)

(edited by graves9 on 14.5.10 1908)
kentish
Andouille








Since: 19.8.05
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#12 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.83
    Originally posted by graves9
    Forgot to mention but Tomko looks terrible. No wonder Vince soured on him after seeing him in a dark Match a year or so ago.He was released shortly after now we see why. Amazing how far he's fallen when he looked like a breakout star back in late '07 early '08.

    (edited by graves9 on 14.5.10 1327)

    (edited by graves9 on 14.5.10 1327)

Agreed, it was sad. Cycling off roids is one thing, but he just looked fat and out of shape. Not even "puffy", to quote our wise friend Warrior.

Regarding OJ, didn't he exchange wins with Pope earlier in the year too?




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BigDaddyLoco
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#13 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.57
    Originally posted by Psycho Penguin
    So they spend weeks building Ink Inc vs Matt Morgan and then they hot shot the titles to The Outsiders three days before the PPV so they can have Ink Inc vs The Outsiders at the PPV now? Or did I miss something? Otherwise that booking confuses me.




I thought Hogan was forcing Morgan to defend the titles with a partner of his choosing at the PPV, or did I just make that up?

I'm a fan of The Band and all, but squashing the Morgan program just like that is a real letdown. It was one of the only angles I was enjoying.

    Originally posted by Karlos the Jackal


    Well -- with the exception that it was Lacey Von Erich who came to Abyss' rescue, which is a weird choice. Are they turning her face? I think they are. Here's my prediction: Angelina Love goes heel and rejoins the Beautiful People, turfing out Von Erich. Von Erich goes on to fill the #1 Face spot vacated by Tara.


I'm all for this. The Beautiful People just aren't the same without Love, and Von Erich stinks anyways. With Kong gone that division is going to live and die with how strong The Beautiful People are, so you might as well get them back together now.

Karlos the Jackal
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Since: 2.1.02
From: The City of Subdued Excitement

Since last post: 30 days
Last activity: 7 min.
#14 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.00
    Originally posted by kentish
    Speaking of the Gore, is Rhino still with the company?
Yeah, but he hasn't been seen more than once or maybe twice since the Hogan takeover.

    Originally posted by BigDaddyLoco
    I thought Hogan was forcing Morgan to defend the titles with a partner of his choosing at the PPV, or did I just make that up?
Yes, that was ostensibly the plan. But they must have known it wasn't by last Monday's show, right? So who knows what they're thinking. Maybe Morgan gets a new partner anyway and goes after Ink Inc. post-PPV?
    Originally posted by BigDaddyLoco
    I'm all for this. The Beautiful People just aren't the same without Love, and Von Erich stinks anyways. With Kong gone that division is going to live and die with how strong The Beautiful People are, so you might as well get them back together now.
I agree. I think they need to find a new "face" of the division, though, for when the Lacey experiment crashes and burns (assuming that's where they're going).

But speaking of Kong, word on the street is that TNA's hired Betsy Ruth. She's the great-granddaughter of Babe Ruth and, as I suggested previously, it looks like they're looking for her to be the new Kong. If you imagine Kong as white -- and one of the Baseball Furies -- you've got Ruth. Here's a page with a couple of pics. And here's her Twitter which confirms the deal.

No idea if she's any good or not. She's the one who injured Daffney a couple of weeks ago; I can't imagine that's a good sign.

--K



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Captaincuba
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Since: 25.10.05

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#15 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.79
I have to give Jordan credit...he is trying to push his gimmick at least. I still think it should be more of a psychological, original Goldust-esque character, but at least its something different. I think the MMA-ish move set also gives him a different style to play off of.

I can't believe I just spent 5 minutes talking about Orlando Jordan.

CC
Karlos the Jackal
Lap cheong








Since: 2.1.02
From: The City of Subdued Excitement

Since last post: 30 days
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#16 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.00
Could a mod change the thread icon to the "Impact" one?

EDIT! Awesome, thanks!

(edited by Karlos the Jackal on 14.5.10 1932)


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CruelAngel777
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Since: 7.4.02

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#17 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.96
    Originally posted by Karlos the Jackal
      Originally posted by kentish

      But speaking of Kong, word on the street is that TNA's hired Betsy Ruth. She's the great-granddaughter of Babe Ruth and, as I suggested previously, it looks like they're looking for her to be the new Kong. If you imagine Kong as white -- and one of the Baseball Furies -- you've got Ruth. Here's a page with a couple of pics. And here's her Twitter which confirms the deal.

      No idea if she's any good or not. She's the one who injured Daffney a couple of weeks ago; I can't imagine that's a good sign.

      --K



    Oh God, it's the female version of that guy in WCW who became the Kiss Demon!

    (edited by CruelAngel777 on 14.5.10 1830)
Big G
Potato korv








Since: 21.8.03
From: the people who brought you Steel Magnolias....

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#18 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.66
    Originally posted by Karlos the Jackal
    -- and one of the Baseball Furies --
    --K


Man I love that movie :)
Mr. Boffo
Scrapple








Since: 24.3.02
From: Oshkosh, WI

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#19 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.67
She would have totally fit in with a car full of juggalos I saw today.
graves9
Landjager








Since: 19.2.10
From: Brooklyn NY

Since last post: 2 days
Last activity: 7 min.
#20 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.22
    Originally posted by kentish
      Originally posted by graves9
      Forgot to mention but Tomko looks terrible. No wonder Vince soured on him after seeing him in a dark Match a year or so ago.He was released shortly after now we see why. Amazing how far he's fallen when he looked like a breakout star back in late '07 early '08.

      (edited by graves9 on 14.5.10 1327)

      (edited by graves9 on 14.5.10 1327)

    Agreed, it was sad. Cycling off roids is one thing, but he just looked fat and out of shape. Not even "puffy", to quote our wise friend Warrior.

    Regarding OJ, didn't he exchange wins with Pope earlier in the year too?
Yes I recall that a few months ago. Bischoff did really praise Jordan's mic work on his facebook page. They are clearly high on the guy.
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Actually, I'd rather see it go the other way. Coach (with some proper coaching, and I suggest Tazz and Cole) could do play by play. Tone down the heel thing a little, but leave it there. Keep Lawler. JR out to pasture.
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