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19.12.14 0213
The W - CRZ's World - ECW 9/11 and Smackdown 9/14 spoilers from Minneapolis - the CRZ timeline
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Since: 9.12.01
From: ミネアポリス

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#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 9.00
Once again, the WWE's failure to excite the masses result in flaccid ticket sales and once again our super sweet front-row tickets in the upper level (for which I dutifully took advantage of the presale password EDGE) were mandatorily swapped out for "better seats" in the lower level. Of course, their idea of "better" means "would have cost more had we actually wanted to pay for them," which of course I didn't. Anyway, giant tarp over the entire upper section - they managed to make the bits opposite the camera look full, at least. Dear WWE: either put on a more exciting product so you can sell out this place, or (and I know you won't bother to even LISTEN to this one) maybe lower the ticket prices so that more people will feel like paying to watch this product.

7:30 RIGHT on time, we begin with the tremendously exciting recording of the Standard Disclaimer. I notice digital cameras are okay now, but they still have a bit of a hardon about people trying to take videos with "devices."

7:31 It's the video that ended WrestleMania 23! Look at those people who don't work here anymore! Ha ha ha!

7:35 Jimmy Korderas sneaks out, then TONY CHIMEL is out to intro ECW (guess Justin Roberts don't work on non-PPV Sundays)...but first, some special opening contests:

7:36 JESSE & FESTUS NOLASTNAME defeated (guessing the names) MATT VOLTAD & CHAD HARRISON in 5'49". Stupid promo from Jesse beforehand. That's the face of a man who loves competition. He becomes a different person once that bell rings! "Humor" spots were kinda hit and miss. Finisher was the Hart Attack clothesline (Festus launching Jesse) into the pin.

7:45 JIMMY WANG YANG pinned KC JAMES (is still employed!) in 5'24" after a moonsault. James was attempting to channel a combination of Curt Hennig, Jackie Fargo and/or Jeff Jarrett but never stopped to ask why Michelle McCool wasn't managing him anymore.

7:53 The music and Titantron of Tazz brings out TAZZ & JOEY STYLES for ECW proper.

7:55 We all stand and scream while they take the "9:45ish" bumper shot for Tuesday's SciFi Channel promo.

7:57 Please welcome ARMANDO ESTRADA!

7:58 Show starts with LAST WEEK clip montage - last week, you might recall, CM Punk won the ECW Championship
ECW show open
Estrada welcomes "for the first time, the NEW ECW Champion..." C.M. PUNK
Estrada tells Punk what a big fan he is, and in return Punk presents him with a new CM Punk T-shirt, which he then signs for him. When Estrada demurs on immediately putting it on, Punk accuses him of insincerity. Estrada goes ahead and puts on the shirt over his jacket after some cajoling. Everyone has a few yuks. Looks like he's supposed to be a tweener for now, although the crowd won't buy any straight/face stuff at this point

8:04 Out comes ELIJAH BURKE - Estrada has an "oh by the way" and mentions that the ECW title match Sunday will be against Burke. Burke breaks up the fashion show but also wants to congratulate Punk. He believed in Punk from the start, he recruited them into his New Breed, blah blah blah, but now he sees the future again and it'll be HIM winning the belt on Sunday.

TONIGHT: CM Punk teams with Stevie Richards to take on the team of Elijah Burke & Kevin Thorn!

I see them setting up some chairs, which can only mean Extreme Expose will soon be sitting at ringside...

8:11 THE MIZ goes back and forth with, incredibly, NOT Balls Mahoney but TOMMY DREAMER, winning with his version of the Slop Drop in 3'34". Kelly's still ambivalent - or a bad actress? Y'know, should we keep calling them Extreme Expose if they no longer expose anything? (This should not be intended as me pining for their rehashed Nitro Girl segments, because I am not.)

WrestleMania 24 ad - look for the new "sun" WM XXIV logo soon on a website near you

"The Marine" ad (most of these ads are probably in-arena only to kill time while they put in spots for REAL ad breaks)

Chimel shills the new Boogeyman shirt available NOW at the concession booths! T-SHIRT CANNON GUY shoots a few T-shirts to the crowd

Backstage, Balls presents Kelly with a teddy bear before HIS big match. Kelly leans in but doesn't seal the deal, instead looking to and fro to make sure nobody's watching, then heads off

8:25 MATT STRIKER defeats NUNZIO in a criminal 0'27" in which the big offensive move is BIG DADDY V pulling Striker out of the corner to avoid the charge. Afterwards, V delivers a post-match beatdown which lasts about three times as long as the match. Finally BOOGEYMAN appears on the ECWtron and promises that V will be as Humpty Dumpty in their big match next week.

Let's see that TONIGHT graphic one more time

8:31 "Rise Today" by Alter Bridge is the official theme music of Unforgiven! I believe this means Alter Bridge's relationship with the WWE has outlasted Maven's, ja?

8:32 BALLS MAHONEY falls to, of all people, (still employed) MIKE KNOX and his devastating KNOXKICK. This is all facilitated by distraction by The Miz. We'll have to wait until Tuesday to see if anyone remembers that Knox used to date Kelly Kelly before she was too exhibitionisty.

TONIGHT: you'll get real tired of this graphic

Tribute to the Troops video

Unforgiven hype

Last Week montage, one more time - amazingly, Punk defeats Morrison AGAIN

8:45 ELIJAH BURKE & KEVIN THORN enter together - STEVIE RICHARDS enters alone and takes just enough time that I'm expecting there'll be an ad break in here. CM PUNK is finally out. This match goes 7'08" and ends when Punk catches Thorn with the GTS and pins him. Punk climbs the ropes and shows Burke (who he'd dropkicked through the ropes to the floor earlier) his title - ECW copyright notice is up and we're out

8:58 Camera takes some more footage of Tazz & Styles - perhaps they're talking about the identity of Mr. McMahon's illegitimate bastard son? The ring change begins...

8:59 Chimel says the main event is now Khali vs. Batista for the Championship - I hadn't heard that stip until now. By the way, the advertised (dark) main event in the TV ads was originally Khali & MVP vs. Batista & Mysterio - that appears to be scratched with the recent storyline developments...

WWE image promotional video - looks like it's more for stockholders but don't let that stop us!

9:07 JBL's theme brings out JBL & MICHAEL COLE. JBL quickly continues to sell out angles by making threatening moves at Jimmy Korderas until he's chased away from the ring crew

We hear a motorcycle and anticipate the presence of Chuck Palumbo in the opening segment

9:10 WWE Open
LAST WEEK clip - Mysterio's mysterious mouth blood is dutifully black-n-white'd
SD open
9:13 (not much) PYRO
TONIGHT: For the first time on network television, Great Khali vs. Batista!

9:14 Divas match: MICHELLE McCOOL (with Chuck Palumbo - and his bike - and his entrance music - and his tron) and VICTORIA (with Kenny Dykstra and EVERYBODY LOVES A BAD GIRL T-shirt) battled to a DDQ in 5'14" when Dykstra and Palumbo entered the ring to fight and wouldn't heed the ref's instructions to get the hell out of the ring. Next thing you know, the match was announced to now be a MIXED TAG (right after these messages)! After a reset, 4'27" went by and McCool took the pin after a big kick. Unfortunately, we did NOT get to see a Jungle Kick from Palumbo - Dykstra held onto the ropes and evaded it. I guess we're building up to it. Har har.

9:28 Backstage, Teddy Long's bachelor party begins as Jesse & Festus (now THIS is the face of a party animal) bring in the ladies, Long's son(?) Antwan, BUTCH REED (!), the Major Brothers (?!) and Sergeant Slaughter. Hilarious dancing ensues.
TONIGHT: For the first time on network television, the second instance of this graphic!
TONIGHT: The WWE's first BELFAST BRAWL between Kane and Finlay!

9:31 "See No Evil" promo (?!) - while we all stare at the screen, a lot of dudes walk out to the ring...then walk back. A Druid is stashed somewhere in here.
The display of an invitation reminds you that next week is the big wedding!
In the ring is a DRUID - no, wait - wait - wait a bit more - it's actually MARK HENRY. Look for them to cleverly edit him having problems removing the gown. The Undertaker isn't the only one who can do the hocus pocus! He has powers, too - let's look at them
We check the clip of Henry taking out Undertaker, while people scurry and set up...something on some wires
Another clip - this one's an Undertaker clip and there'll be bad news come Sunday. During THIS clip, we see that it's a cross...err, Undertaker symbol
When Taker's warning finishes, we see the symbol, then BOOM and it catches fire

They kinda blow it here, actually rewinding the video while displaying it on all the screens in the arena - looks like they'll have no problem superimposing a lightning bolt onto that in post-production. (You know, I think we had a lightning bolt during the LAST taping here as well, only it was meant for Great Khali and Daivari then.)
During the break, the power of darkness is combatted with fire extinguishers - I make a "the fire still burns" joke

9:41 Here's a look at the 2007 Diva Search finalists - head over to wwe.com and cast some votes after checking out competition #1 - BEACH VOLLEYBALL

9:44 MVP and Matt Hardy are playing chess - Hardy must be winning because MVP sneezes and accidentally clears the board. Hardy tells him that oh, by the way, he had Long book him in a match with Domino and it's coming up. But don't worry - he'll be in his corner, Cap'n!

9:45 JAMIE NOBLE is upset by SHANNON MOORE in 6'05" when Moore cleverly tricks Noble into thinking that Hornswoggle is underneath the ring, taking his attention away from getting rolled up. Since we DIDN'T see Hornswoggle here, I have great fear that he WILL be revealed as the son tomorrow.
Backstage, Vickie Guerrero tricks Kristal into attending her surprise bachelorette party. Party guests are Michelle, Torrie Wilson and Extreme Expose. (Maryse must still be in the tub.)
MVP tries to talk Mickie Henson out of wrestling in his suit which costs more than he makes in....I forget his exact words, but it was a while. No dice, says Henson - it's NEXT!

And now, the Just for Men hair colour Stay in the Game moment! From last week, Matt Hardy has a surprise match with Deuce

MVP is out to battle DOMINO (with Duece and Cherry and a car) - MATT HARDY comes out later to cheerlead, which ends up with Matt saying "M! V! P!" and us saying "SUCKS!" which allows Hardy a lot of overacting to humorous effect. Ending sees Domino take Porter down in 6'26" after he spends a little too much time jawing with Hardy. Postmatch they work on the chant one more time but get the same results. One thing of note: Domino rips off Porter's tank top during the match and we get to see the dreaded TATTOOS...which was the head of....someone I didn't recognise straight away. Sorry

10:09 JBL and Cole hame it up for the camera
At Unforgiven, it'll be a big triple threat match for the World Championship!
TONIGHT: yes, another time for the first time on network television

10:11 Exterior shot of the Target Center gets large pop from people who recognise it
Back to the bachelorette party - here's a UPS man (you can tell by his big, fake "UPS" logo on his shirt) with a package. Of course, he's NOT really a stripper despite all the women thinking he is. Har har. The big box is delivered, and inside is....you guessed it...Big Dick Johnson. NEXT
Invitation #2 from Kristal & Theodore - it's NEXT WEEK, PEOPLE

WWE 24/7 On Demand promotional clip
Another mention of Alter Bridge (Maven?)

10:16 Khali and Singh speak many languages. I'm getting the impression that the one of the two reasons most people bought a ticket (Mysterio) ain't showing up tonight.

10:18 The hotly anticipated (for almost an hour, anyway) Belfast Brawl came next. Rules were: no COR, no DQ, pinfall or submission only. It was really quite good. KANE's pyro woke everybody up, but FINLAY decided to get the jump before his entrance started. They didn't go over the barriers, but did brawl all the way around the ring a couple times. Many interesting weapons, exposed turnbuckles, chairs, shillelaghs, analysis from the child behind me (of Finlay: "He's taking out the wrong arm!"), a small measure of revenge for Kane shillelagh-wise, but in the end it was the fighting Irishman securing the Celtic cross for the pin.
Kane did NOT set the turnbuckles on fire

10:36 In a segment which may not air on Friday, HORNSWOGGLE randomly appeared from nowhere, jumped Cole, then absconded with the shillelagh remaining in the ring. I'm REALLY worried about him being the bastard.

10:38 Locked out of his bachelor party, Teddy bumps into Kristal - hijinks ensue, Ron Simmons utters a single word. Then everyone dances. I shit you not.

10:40 JBL & Cole yuk it up, then hype Unforgiven

10:41 BATISTA vs. GREAT KHALI (for the championship - maybe) - Batista is the remaining reason people bought tickets to this show - and man he is OVER. Even my wife came out of this show sporting a Batista shirt (Batista on front, "I WALK ALONE" and NO WWE logo on the back - she may wear it to work!) Sadly, not much of a match - the ref got to five and when Khali STILL refused to release his version of the CRRRRRRRRRRUSH, the DQ followed at 4'03". Many refs came out but he still wouldn't let go. Finally, he let go. Somewhere in here I started booing very loud and deep, starting a cascade of boos throughout the arena. I HAVE POWER. Does Khali have ANY opponents left for Sunday?

10:52 We're done. Trainer CHRIS BRENNAN is out, and with a couple refs he finally manages to get to his feet and stagger off
The power of his music causes him to stop, turn back, and acknowledge the fans one more time

10:57 Chimel thanks us, good night

Probably not worth the price of admission, but as long as I keep getting presale passwords, I'll probably keep buying tickets. BECAUSE I AM A SUCKER. THANKS, VINCE






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Since: 8.5.03
From: North Carolina

Since last post: 11 hours
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#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.01
I had heard the MVP tattoo that so concerned the WWE was of Malcolm X.

Is Striker hurt? When was the last time he wrestled a full match?



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Since: 11.12.01
From: China, Maine

Since last post: 14 days
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#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.30


So, were you sitting where we will be able to see you on television? Should we be looking for Kim in the Batista shirt?




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Since: 2.1.02
From: Hawthorne, CA

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#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.94

    Originally posted by pieman
    So, were you sitting where we will be able to see you on television? Should we be looking for Kim in the Batista shirt?
And did you take any pics? I've always wanted to see what the tarped off section looks like.



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CRZ
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Since: 9.12.01
From: ミネアポリス

Since last post: 11 hours
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#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 9.00
No, no, and no. Although if you manage to spy an I DID IT shirt, it's probably me. I will probably bring my camera to the next one now that it's kosher with WWE.



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Since: 2.1.02
From: MD, USA

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#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.84

KC James is in Ohio Valley, as one-half of Southern Boys tag-team with Cassidy James (Ne Cassidy Riley).



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