"Listen, I don't need no re-- wait, weren't you in the Mean Street Posse?"
HHH: "I give this to you, Batista! Instant respect! You don't need to win a match...you just need my blessing! YOU'RE THE CHAMPION! I gotta go man, I'll catch you later." [Seconds later] Batista: "...isn't this the WCW title? It is! You dick."
Teddy: And that's why you DON'T marry a stripper just because you knocked her up. Eddy: He's got a point, man.
"Look, at least I had the decency to turn heel awhile ago. Nobody EVER liked YOU, cheeseball."
Kid Kash and Jimmy Snuka - the battle over who has the inferior vocabulary.
No matter what caption is placed here, the real joke is Maven getting a push towards the main event. GOTCHA!
Hall: How much are we making now? Nash: *sigh* Not enough.
"Bending...over backwards...holding...breath...is that a pig flying? YES! MY OWN DVD!"
(edited by Deputy Marshall on 25.11.04 0302) 'Pro-Choice' Gene Snitsky says: "Her body...MY CHOICE!"
Kurt: Scratch your own self! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(2)
Me Enforcer. No Anderson get this close to belt. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(3)
Booker: Three years, Three years, Three years, and only a bad haircut to show for it! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(4)
Big Show: TEDDY, You say this haircut was cool and everyone was gonna get it! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(5)
I am also a one man band! I can hum and do the drum beat to the "Heat is On!" --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(6)
Kid Kash: Who thinks Snuka deserves one more pay day? --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(7)
Kidman: Please tell me this is not a dream, I am married to Torrie Wilson, right? --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(8)
HHH: The first winner of Tough Enough, and you still don't have a clue! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(9)
Hall: Hey yo, your right I was standing here 8 years ago, when you gonna throw a cruiser into the trailor again? Nash: I do not think I do that until week 3 of the comeback. Hall: Someone get the WCW tapes so we can do this right! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(10)
My World looks the right way from this angle
PAM ANDERSON on being named E!'s best blonde: "The carpet don't match the drapes!" "... Just kidding, there is no carpet."
When Kurt Angle says he'd like "to shoot on" Eugene, Eugene, having already been initiated by Bradshaw, gladly agrees. It's an awkward moment.
(2)
Batista realizes it is his destiny to win the world title, when the markings of the belt design directly match a pattern of bulging, turgid veins popping out of his shoulders.
(3)
No one even suspects the true identity of Barak Obama's speech writer, but that person knows who he is. And that's enough.
(4)
John Cena knows the real reason they call him "peanut", but he swore never to tell a soul
(5)
Christian is hard to argue with when he claims the mantle of "fuckin' ugliest RAW graphic", but Edge is a close second.
(6)
I may look like David Spade with an eating disorder, but THIS GUY killed somebody! (7)
Please God, don't let her be pregnant. Please....I'm not ready to be a daddy. And if Torrie finds out I knocked up Jazz, and then got her fired, she'll KILL me!
(8)
Triple H gently corrects the misguided youngster Maven on the correct placement of a nicotine patch.
(9)
Nash: That's splendid, ma'am, and is this your first time flying with American Airlines...?
(10)
Leave it to RVD to finally find long-misplaced WWE superstar Mini-Vader.
Hot Virgins-The World's Most Steadily Shrinking Commodity
Eugene: "SUCK IT!" Angle: "Aw man, not THAT crap again..." (2)
"You know, I could slide this into a gym bag and be gone before anybody knows about it..." (3)
"Ayyyyyyyyy!" (4)
Though RVD seems to understand Teddy Long's explanation of how to get a push and keep it, Eddie's just hoping that Show doesn't drop that towel. (5)
Christian: "Man, that brisket feels like it's caught right about here." Edge: "I TOLD you that you should have had some nice soup instead." (6)
"He doesn't look like much, so I'll open the bidding at $300!" (7)
"Please God, I don't want to go job to Triple H on RAW! Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease!" (8)
"It's only your soul, Maven - then you can join the dark legion and proclaim yourself a champion as well. The cut needs to be at the BACK of your head, though." (9)
Desperate to inject life into his matches, Nash hires Steven Seagal to review his matches. (10)
RVD foolishly ignored Show's threat to turn anybody who made fun of his bald head into a human coffee table.
I'm going twenty-four hours a day...I can't seem to stop - "Turn Up The Radio", Autograph
Wiener Of The Day - June 10th, 2003 W Of The Day - September 11th, 2004 (add spooky music here)
Angle: Who would have thought the two of us would be together in a backstage sketch? Eugene: Some guy named Canadian Bulldog predicted it here (at the bottom of the page). (2)
Wait a sec.... if I started wearing this thing... people would think I'M the champion! (3)
I'm gonna win the title? Yeah - haw, that's a good one... (4)
Teddy: So how many of you playas got your heads shaved like I asked? RVD: *Please* don't notice me in the background... (5)
Christian: One sec, guys, just getting a bit of heartburn... there, there, it's gone. Edge: About f*****g time! (6)
Kash: Hold on ONE SECOND! This isn't Siva Afi! (7)
.... and I'd like a new wagon for Christmas, and a Star Wars toy, and some Hot Wheels cars, and... (8)
HHH: See, me and Stephanie, we have an agreement... (9)
Hall: Yo, Kev. What're you watching? Nash: You see this part where Steamboat spins around Flair, then ties him up in a reverse chicken wing? Bastard stole that move from me!!! (10) If I stay hidden on the floor like this, maybe they won't make me shave my head...
I dunno how well this WWE Champion Belt toilet paper is going to sell. (3)
At Armageddon, who's going to be the big loser? Yep! Me, Booker T! (4)
Sorry, but RAW beat us to the NFL parody. Show, get your clothes back on. (5)
Read your book and I felt something right here. (BELCH) Okay, it's gone now. (6)
. . . And thanks to the TNA fans for coming out! All 46 of you!! (7)
Tazz: What's this? Looks like one of the Tough Enough guys got loose. (8)
So you see, Maven, that just goes for guys with big feet. (9)
Hall: --And we're ready for launch. 10 . . . 9 . . . 8 . . . ah, screw it, they don't pay me enough to finish this countdown. Nash, want to get some Taco Bell? Nash: Fine with me. My knees were aching from all the sitting anyway. (10)
See, if I can be pinned like this, I won't have the spotlights blinding me so often.
Originally posted by KawshenIt's Thanksgiving. It's a W Tradition (kind of). It's the 16th Captionomics~!
This time, I bring to you 10 pics from the major wrestling organizations... and TNA. So get ta cappin'.
The hardest part is not reading the others first
(1) Yeah, I used to have really goofy hair too.
(2) You want me to use Brasso on this, Massa Trips?
(3)
See that Poster? I designed that. I have a future . I don't have to depend on sucking up to Triple H like everyone else around here! I have Skills, Sucker! (4) OK, everybody practice your "pissed off" look, because you're you're NOT being pushed.
(5) I got this shirtt directly from Rene Goulet, Mister!
(6) "Thought balloon" - 'Brudda, I wish I had saved some money a long time ago'
(7) "Dear Jesus, please, please, don't allow Vince to bring back Buff Bagwell - Amen!"
(8) How does it feel to be the second coming of Steve Lombardi?
(9) Thought Balloon (over the woman in the background) - "52 minutes and 21 seconds left until the show is over, 52 minutes and 20 seconds left until the show is over, 52 minutes and 19 seconds left until the show is over"
(10)
After a couple Joints, I look this way all the time.
Now, is it ok for me yell THEATRE! in a crowded fire?
This is a captionomics as such but could someone please add a picture to this i have no idea how to do it. There was a picture in Taboo Tuesday where The Bischoff is getting his head shaved and is argueing with couch and Vince is hugging the dress dummy. Its perfect for this
CALLER : Lazlow I'm naked! LAZLOW : Thanks I didn't need to know that
(1)WWE's first Olympic Gold Medalist and first Special Olympic Gold Medalist: Together at last. (2)"They push that other big musclehead Lesnar to the moon and he bails on the company, while I was a good soldier and I get rewarded with being HHH's lackey. I should be wearing this right now." (3)"It's me, it's me, Book....errr....teeee" (4)Long: "Damn Big Show, didn't I tell you to lay off the spicy food?" Cena: "Ewww...." Eddie: "What the hell died up your ass?" (5)Christian: "I pledge allegiance, to the flag,..." (6)Kash: "Anybody in the crowd have a coconut by any chance?" (7)"Please God, let tonight be the night Torrie finally lets me give her anal" (8)HHH: "You thought Patterson really loved you? Don't feel bad, I fell for that line once too." (9)Hall: "Yo, it's bad enough we actually have to work a somewhat regular wrestling schedule, but have to work the production booth backstage too?" Nash: "Yeah man, I miss the good old days in WCW where we got tons of money for so little work." Hall: "You get in touch with MCMahon yet?" Nash: "He hasn't returned any of my phone calls." (10)"Anyone in here? Help, Please? I'm stuck in this position..."
Angle, in a rare moment of kindness, avoided criticism of Eugene's hastily assembled Ronald McDonald costume.
(2)
"Should I be worried that he welded his nameplate onto this thing?"
(3)
In his ongoing attempts to destroy Booker T's career forever, Vince MacMahon uses his ownership of WCW material to reassign the Disco Inferno gimmick.
(4)
Van Dam looked over his shoulder, noticed for the first time that he was the only one wearing pants, and ran out of the room faster than he had ever ran in his life.
(5)
"...and then Gangrel came by with a frisbee and they went nuts over him instead! Remember that? Man, that still pisses me off."
(6)
"...this is most decidedly not what I meant when I asked for cash up front."
(7)
It doesn't matter how heartfelt and sincere your prayer is -- if halfway through you blow the biggest sneeze in the history of civilization, then man, you're out of luck.
(8)
"Truthfully, I'm having trouble deciding whether to make fun of you for the 'flesh-coloured' bandage or for failing to button your shirt correctly. What do you think, should I flip a coin?"
(9)
The sad part? They're actually an improvement over the morning show guys my local rock station usually has.
(10)
There comes a certain point when a man will legitimately try anything to get rid of the hiccups.
In honor of The-W's chief satirist, Matt Hocking (and frankly, rip off his bit), I must do this...
Batista: Flair: STOP DOING THAT!
There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened. - The Restaurant at the End of the Universe
1. When Creative said that he would be involved in a wedding angle, this isn't exactly what Kurt had in mind....
2. Somewhere, in a hotel room, Triple H woke up screaming, startling his new bride and whatever hooker they picked up that night. They both wondered what was wrong, but HHH, even being miles away, knew someone was touching his precious.
3. In a feeble attempt to score weed at the "Legalize Pot" rally, Booker tries to convince some stoners that he's RVD. Sadly, it works.
4. RVD slowly creeps out of the room when he starts hearing the phrases "Drug Test", "Getting JBL'd" and "Is that your Big Show or are you just happy to see me?"
5. Edge and Todd Grisham are both well aware that they are hearing the worst version of "Bootylicious" that they have ever heard.
6. Seconds later, Snuka gets tired of hearing the worst version of "Bootylicious" that HE'S ever heard and kills Kid Kash. Then Jeff Jarett runs in and pins the dead body. But not before hitting it with a guitar.
7. "So, God, I'm thinking.... I need a push... I'm not REALLY into the whole 'Jewish' thing.... I saw it worked for Triple H.... you think you can get Shane to umm... 'switch sides'? I mean, Torrie's just a beard...."
8. It took all of Maven's intestinal fortitude for him not to throw up as HHH described his 'romantic' weekend with Stephanie, right down to the 'Cauliflower Incident', the catsuit (that HE wore) and an oiled up Pat Patterson.
9. Nash and Hall sit in stunned silence as Dusty Rhodes demostrates with an 60 yr old drag queen the REAL definition of a "Dusty Finish".
10. RVD, trying to outsmart the drug police, pretends to be a table when they check out the locker room.
(edited by DirtyMikeSeaver on 26.11.04 1145) By the way, Storm's gimmick includes 1.) telling the audience to shut up, and 2.) occasionally making everyone stand for the Canadian national anthem. You know they don't know what to do with a wrestler when he's making fans stand for a national anthem. It's like waving a white flag and saying, "This guy has no personality -- we give up."
Thread ahead: Celebrity involvement Next thread: FAN PICTS FROM WWE AT MONTERREY MEXICO ! Previous thread: TNA News... and it doesn't sound all that bad!
Hey, look, it's back online. ON TONIGHT'S SHOW: In our main event, Ted DiBiase goes one on one with Tyson Kidd! Also, Alex Riley meets JTG! Former tag team champion Michael McGillicutty battles "Showtime" Percy Watson! Tamina collides with A....