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23.8.14 0637
The W - Site Bashing - Another reason to hate The Slammer
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Alessandro
Lap cheong








Since: 2.1.02
From: Worcester MA

Since last post: 22 days
Last activity: 4 days
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.04
A "humorous Christmas-themed" article, which is neither humorous nor coherent in any conceivable fashion ...

http://www.nydailynews.com/ sports/story/149302p- 131649c.html

Now that St. Nick has come and gone and you're standing in the "return" line at Wal-Mart with a "Barbie's Yukon Buzz Saw" in hand, here's something to help pass the time: things that may have been left under the tree of some of our favorite wrestling folks:

The Rock: A "pet Rock."

Eric Bischoff: A year's supply of chili to help him alter the ozone layer.

The Big Show: A year's supply of pizza in an attempt to alter the Earth's axis.

The Spanish-speaking announcers: A folding metal table, inciting the woodpecker population to picket every pay-per-view event.

Ric Flair: My Aunts Thelma and Louise - Woooooooooo!!

Vince McMahon: To help work on his "diminished mental capacity," a certificate for unlimited visits to my personal therapist Dr. Hugo Hackenbush.

Kane: A mask.

Hulk Hogan: A contract for a match at "Wrestlemania" vs. Vince.

Chris Jericho: Sable (and we don't mean a coat).

Linda McMahon: Confirmation of a winner for putting the WCW up for auction on eBay.

Ted Turner: Notification of being the highest bidder for the WCW.

Tazz: A tape of Tazz playing himself in a "Bugs Bunny" cartoon.

La Resistance: Deportation papers.

The Dudley Boyz: Their own steel cage to play in.

Lita, Trish, Stacy: Copies of "The DaVinci Code," so they can make an attempt to unlock the code.

The Undertaker: A bicycle built for two.

Stone Cold Steve Austin: A case of O'Doul's.

Shawn Michaels: A job as the new co-manager (with Elvis) of the "Heartbreak Hotel."

Goldberg: A ticket to Japan as he attempts to become Emperor.

Triple H: His name on the ballot to run for governor of Connecticut.

The Ultimate Warrior: A copy of the book "Where Are They Now?"

Mick Foley: A pen and pencil set so he can keep writing.

Jerry "NWA/TNA" Jarrett: A contract with the USA Network so fans have a "free" alternative to the WWE.

Brock Lesnar: A new disposition.

Scott Steiner: A muscle relaxer.

P.S. Happy New Year and be careful celebrating, the life you save could be mine!

The Slammer is the New York Daily News pro-wrestling columnist.




Alessandro "Hercules" Boondy







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JoshMann
Andouille








Since: 17.11.03
From: Tallahassee, FL

Since last post: 2231 days
Last activity: 2228 days
AIM:  
Y!:
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.64
There's supposed to be a point in this article where I laugh, right?

But then again the next time I find The Slammer funny OR enlightening will be the first time.



As long as somebody CTC at the end of the day, I'm with them.
BOSsportsfan34
Pepperoni








Since: 2.1.03
From: MA

Since last post: 89 days
Last activity: 51 days
AIM:  
Y!:
#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.80
Makes you long for the days of Killer Kowalski's weekley wrestling column in the Boston Herald.



Believe me, I'm not defending message boards -- they can be evil places

ESPN.com's Bill Simmons
JoshMann
Andouille








Since: 17.11.03
From: Tallahassee, FL

Since last post: 2231 days
Last activity: 2228 days
AIM:  
Y!:
#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.64
I actually hate to admit this, but the first source of "smart" wrestling news I remember reading was Alex Marvez's Sunday corner section in the Miami Herald. And that was about 1989 or 1990.

I mean, it wasn't GREAT stuff, but that was my first exposure to any wrestling news that wasn't kayfabed.




As long as somebody CTC at the end of the day, I'm with them.
Alex
Bratwurst








Since: 24.2.02

Since last post: 16 days
Last activity: 8 hours
#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.44
Who the hell is The Slammer besides some shitty writer in a stupid mask?

Hyatte's version is funnier.

Hyatte's version is funny at all.

(edited by Mack Salmon on 2.1.04 1039)
Jerichoholic
Pinkelwurst








Since: 23.12.03
From: Amsterdam, holland

Since last post: 3795 days
Last activity: 3794 days
#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.00
He forgot one.
Chris Benoit-A personality
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