One of my favorite metaphors of yours back in the day was your dissection of Cheez-It Party Mix, and how closely the ingredients mirrored all that was right and wrong with WCW Monday Nitro.
Let us take you back to 1999...
"And now, children, gather round as I share with you the tale of my great love for Cheez-It Party Mix. I love Cheez-It Party Mix. I love the Cheez-Its. I love the Shuffles - the cheesy crackers in the shape of playing card suits. I love the indigestable Sesame logs. I love the Sourdough bits. And I love the rice puffs. But the problem is about half of the box of Cheez-It Party Mix is pretzels - butter sticks and regular twists. The pretzels are the bits you put up with and pay for to get to the good stuff. THIS MATCH IS THE PRETZELS!"
It is for this reason, and several others, that I wish to share with you the joy that is nuts.com.
At nuts.com, not only can you order specific snack ingredients like sesame logs (called "sticks" for some reason, probably a lawsuit), but you can choose from many different flavors of sesame logs!
You probably knew about this, but I didn't. So in the off chance that you didn't, now we both do.
First, it's always a joy to hear from you because I never know when it's gonna happen. I hope you haven't been knocked out by any celebrities lately.
When they ended up changing the formula for Cheez-It Party Mix, I died a little. (Probably a metaphor in THERE, too.)
But sesame sticks and sesame logs actually ARE two different things - sticks are those things you can buy in bulk in the bulk foods section, and logs are like those tiny breadsticks that have loads of sesame seeds stuck to 'em.
And it's that bulk foods section of my local grocerie which will probably keep me from investing in a nuts.com purchase. I actually am not big on the flavours - just reg'lar is fine with me, and actually the cheapest per pound! Just make sure they're "fresh" before you start scooping out of that barrel.
I remember last year hearing about this, and wondering why it wasnt as big a news story as the DC sniper. Then, I realised, its because the guy cant shoot. That 270 loop is indeed scarey enough to drive.