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10.10.15 0214
The W - Pro Wrestling - This is Basic Captionomics. (#8)
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Since: 2.1.02
From: Bronx, NY

Since last post: 2310 days
Last activity: 570 days
#1 Posted on
You know the drill. Enjoy.









(edited by Kawshen on 5.7.03 1324)

Promote this thread!

Since: 8.6.02
From: La Arena del Treno

Since last post: 2752 days
Last activity: 1818 days
#2 Posted on
1)UUUUrgh Booker angry! Booker smash beefaroony!

2)Brock: "Kurt, always plying me full of milk."

3)Kane: "RVD, beat me if you...
RVD: "Whoa dude gotta avoid those ECW time loops."

4)Undertaker and Orlando Jordan look on as Kareem Abdul-Jabbar tries to steal some airtime.

5)As Chris Jericho speaks Scott Steiner is shocked and awed by the dead crowd

6)Storm: "I, Lance Storm is going to kill the President of the United States."

7)Randy Orton is not sure how to react to the 400 lbs. woman flashing the crowd.

8)Guerrero and Tajiri find themselves locked in an aquarium by the dastardly Team Angle.

Triple H's Theme

Time to flame the lame... time to flame the lame

It's all about the game, and how you play it
I hunger for control, That why I'm with Stephanie
It's all about the lame,and Vince has gotta pay me... I am the lame... you don't want to like me... I want control
I used to do Joanie... I am Kev's bitch... But people still hate me
I am the lame... and Zenk is going to flame me

Since: 28.1.02
From: Louisville, KY

Since last post: 3 days
Last activity: 6 hours
#3 Posted on

    Originally posted by Kawshen
    You know the drill. Enjoy.

    1)FIVE Time, FIVE Time, FIVE Time,FIVE Time, FIVE Time Chef-boy-R-D eater.

    2)I milked that myself this morning, Kurt.

    3)Confucius Says ... Man who stand on toilet high on pot.

    5)You findin' anything with that minin', BPP?

    6)Now I lay us down to sleep, I pray the Lord our Souls to keep. If we should die before we wake, I ask the Lord our Souls to take. - OK, now we can have my very exciting match. Want to sing now?

    7)Where's Ole When you need him, Damnit!

    (edited by Kawshen on 5.7.03 1324)

We'll be back as soon as order is restored.....

Since: 12.10.02
From: Canada

Since last post: 3613 days
Last activity: 3613 days
#4 Posted on

    Originally posted by Kawshen
    You know the drill. Enjoy.

    1)Tell me I didn't just shill this crap.

    2)No thanks, Kurt, I'm lactose-intolerant.

    3)Please, I really think I have a cavity.

    4)Cena: Come on Taker, Tai-Bo is so 90's.

    5)Jericho: No Scott, you can't join the "Buried by Trips" Club.

    6)Oh crap, I forgot my spectacles!


    8)Pam & Tommy - Tajiri & Eddy...

    (edited by Kawshen on 5.7.03 1324)

Evil Antler God
Potato korv

Since: 10.1.02

Since last post: 3291 days
Last activity: 1417 days
#5 Posted on

    Booker: The man who invents non-slipping off your fork ravioli'll be one rich dawg, dawg

    Kurt Angle elaborates on his post wrestling career: sperm donor

    As RVD does his Liu Kang impression, Kane hides behind his towel and repeats "There's no place like home" over and over again.

    Cena: Dude, I didn't know you knew Samuel L. Jackson! But what the hell happened to his pants?

    Upon seeing new interviewer Mary Kate Olsen up close, Big Poppa Pump promptly loses his lunch.

    After 10 awkward minutes, Lance Storm still had not moved an inch from this position


    A very confused Tajiri giggles like a schoolgirl as Eddie lets him know they're out of gas

(edited by Evil Antler God on 5.7.03 1822)

Anybody can kick people's asses. But it takes a true monster to kick people's asses AND breastfeed at the same time
- Excalibur05

Since: 2.1.02
From: East TN

Since last post: 3920 days
Last activity: 3798 days
#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.22

Jordan: I hope that ring boy can outrun Patterson.

Steiner: What is that smell? OH MY GOD! I just hope she's wearing a diaper.

"'My dixie wrecked.' What's that supposed to mean?"

The present Man, the past Man, the...retarded Man? I think evolution took a wrong turn somewhere.

(edited by rockstar on 5.7.03 1736)

"Life is tough. Life is tougher if you're stupid."
--John Wayne

"If I can't dazzle you with brilliance, then I'll befuddle you with bullshit."
--"Dirty" Dutch Mantel

Or it's like you lost your keys in the garage, but you look for them in the living room because you know there's another set of keys in there that you need to find anyway.

Since: 2.1.02
From: Madison, WI

Since last post: 873 days
Last activity: 4 days
#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.22

"I'd rather be eating Swanson with that fine ho, sucka!"


Brock: "Man, that Chef Boy-Ar-Dee is giving me bad heartburn."
Kurt: "Looks like you could use a nice cold glass of milk!"


RVD: "Now you just sit there with that towel on your head until you're ready to play nice, young man!"


When Undertaker saw Kareem, he was shocked to see how much people *really* shrink with age.


Y2J:"Steiner, you should know that chainmail only works on cruiserweights!"


"Take my wife, please! Laughter! Wait, was I supposed to say that last part out loud?"


Flair: "Look everybody! Randy's doing his Shane McMahon impression!"
HHH: "I don't like it. I'll have to hold him down for it - nah, I'll hold him down just for fun."


Eddie: "Ese, you keep smiling like that, everybody's going to get wise to our little 'tag-team', homes!"

I'm going twenty-four hours a day...I can't seem to stop
- "Turn Up The Radio", Autograph

It had to happen eventually: Wiener Of The Day - June 10th, 2003

Since: 1.2.02
From: Appleton, WI

Since last post: 1100 days
Last activity: 1100 days
#8 Posted on
Tough ones this time.

1. Mmm, Chef Boyardee. It's better than Denny's!

2. Brock: Honey, this rollup is giving me heartburn. I need to use the bathroom.
Kurt: Hey, can you believe I've nearly drank a whole freakin' gallon of milk? And it's not even June.
(Note: June is Dairy Month)

3. Rob: Kane, without your mask you're no longer marketable. Nobody wants to see a big, bald guy who mopes around backstage with a towel over his head. But I'm not telling you anything you don't already know.

4. (singing) All of these are not like the other. None of these things are kinda the same. None of these things are not like the other. Now it's time to rap-out our evil plan.

5. Jericho: And our second nominee for the "Best Dressed" award is Scott Steiner, for his unique Chainmail +1 vs. Crusierweights.
Steiner: (cough)

6. Lance Storm prepares to give his acceptance speech. No-one had the heart to let him know that he wasn't even nominated in any category, however.

7. Flair: Just look at this pose. How can you tell me he doesn't look more homoerotic than Rico? He's even got the lip pucker thing going people! Whoo!
HHH (thinking): Wow, I never noticed that. Sure hope Kawshen doesn't get a screen cap. of this for his captions page.

8. Tajiri tries to peel his lower lip from his face. Fortuantely, the WWE had this camera installed in the car should just such an event occur.

(edited by ScreamingHeadGuy on 5.7.03 1925)

Fashion Reporter Extraordinare

Wisdom is learning from one's mistakes.
Greater wisdom is learning from the mistakes of others.


Since: 8.6.02
From: Canada

Since last post: 59 days
Last activity: 17 days
#9 Posted on

Booker, despite significant praise for his awesome physique, goes on the much ballyhooed Spike Dudley diet.

Angle challenges an unwitting Brock Lesnar to down his Olympic-sized sperm sample.

RVD realizes what in his heart he already knew about his partner. Kane is not the New Diesel, Issac Yankem, or even Glen Jacobs. He's Cobra Commander.

A rare sneak peak behind the making of a tae-bo info-mercial.

Chris Jericho, wanting to stir the pot and get fired so his band can be featured on such high-quality programs as Last Call with Carson Daly, exposes Steiner in the ring by doing something Steiner can't: Straightening one of his arms.


Lance Storm remembers only too late that he had a coupon for his last trip to Supercuts.

The three horsemen stand triumphant in the ring. Because Triple H insists on being War, Famine, and Death (for the company anyway) Flair and Orton are forced to share pestilence. Orton makes a funny face as he tries to figure out what that is.

A drunken Zorro hooks up with the Green Hornet's sidekick, Kato; and both choose to ignore Commissoner Gordon's distress signal.

(edited by Hogan's My Dad on 5.7.03 1739)

(edited by Hogan's My Dad on 5.7.03 1741)

"Whatever I just posted above is what your mother said in bed last night."

Since: 5.3.03

Since last post: 897 days
Last activity: 896 days
#10 Posted on

What'chu MEAN Triple H ain't letting me do endorsements, now?


Lesnar: No, I couldn't eat another bite...
Angle: Aw, come on. I practically insist.

RVD: Okay.... let's assess the situation. True enough, I said last fall that the storylines couldn't get any worse...


Cena: How 'bout I beat you clean?
Undertaker: Nope
Cena: How 'bout I win by cheating?
Undertaker: Nope
Cena: How 'bout I just sneak-attack you backstage?
Undertaker: I don't think so.
Cena: Well... can I at least beat this loser?
Undertaker: Fine.

Steiner: Hold on, hold on.... Jericho ISN'T a woman?
Keibler: 'Fraid not
Jericho: That's what I kept trying to tell you last night, assclown!


Picture the audience in their underwear, picture the audience in their underwear...

HHH: (Thinking) Okay, just keep walking away slowly... no one will notice....

The number one reason why 'Dude, Where's My Car II' won't be a box office smash...

What really happened to Hulk Hollywood Hogan?
For this and more, check out the latest Inside The Ropes at

Since: 6.1.02
From: Pittsburgh, PA

Since last post: 46 days
Last activity: 7 hours
#11 Posted on
1. After his new inheritance Jamie Noble treats the WWE superstars to the finest meals.
2. Kurt: Sure was nice of Jamie to buy us all this food.
Lesnar: Yes, it gets me right here.
3. RVD: Look on the bright side dude....atleast Katie Vick never saw your face.....and she's she never will!
4. Cena wonders if this is a bad time to give Undertaker the gift he bought him, a Doug Christie jersey.
5. Jericho: I'd recognize those teeth anywhere. Ralphus! I missed you pal!
6. Lance: By the time I read what's written here you could've watched my matches against Goldberg and Edge.....twice.
7. Triple H wonders why Orton is always smiling when Flair talks about Space Mountain.
8. Eddie: You do realize that when Chavo comes back I'm going to have to put you through that winshield.......Just kidding man! I would NEVER do that!

Lance's Response:

Swordsman Yen

Since: 16.2.02
From: Shaolin

Since last post: 4289 days
Last activity: 4272 days
#12 Posted on | Instant Rating: 10.00
Well you know something, Mean Gene...

"Chey Boyardee Spinaroonies: They Ain't Just For Breakfast Anymore, Sucka!"


"Kurt, it's gonna take more than a gallon of milk to neutralize Eddie's tamales."


"...Uhhhh, be right there in a minute Rob....mmm, ooooo Katie..."


A deleted scene from the White Men Can't Jump DVD.


Steiner is in shock when Jericho declares him the winner of the Best Wrestler Who Wears Chainmail On His Head Award.


"Oh no! I'm having that dream where I cut a promo in the ring naked, except it isn't a dream. Shit!"


HHH looks on as Flair and Orton to strut their stuff to the tune of Rupaul's "You Better Work".


"License? Yea, Tajiri, I got a license. It's on the bumper, man!"

Mr Heel II
Lap cheong

Since: 25.2.02

Since last post: 15 days
Last activity: 11 hours
#13 Posted on


Booker T desperately awaits the day he's allowed to eat at Wendy's again.


"C'mon. One more hit." "No way, Kurt. I can feel my arteries clogging now with that 'whole' crap you drink. Back to 2 percent for me."


"Dude, now that the mask is off, I've signed you up for a television show that will create a whole new image for you. It's called 'What Not to Wear'." "Fuck off, Rob."


"...See? I TOLD you Nathan Jones could turn black before you." "That's NOT Nathan Jones." "Is too." "Is not." "Is too."


"STEINER! Was that you?" "Whoops! Tee hee"



"I am a sexy beast."


"Hey Cowboy Bob! You think YOU could have spawned this bad boy? It was ME baby!"


Tajiri tries NOT to stare at Eddie's manly shaved breasts.

Lap cheong

Since: 4.4.03
From: Nitro WV

Since last post: 19 days
Last activity: 21 hours
#14 Posted on

    I have this look on my face because they paid me to say it was good yet I can already feel the heartburn with headache starting.


    Kurt: I can chug more milk than you.
    Brock: I can do that plus squirt it my nose.
    Kurt: That's gross, it's true, it's true.


    RVD: So the writers took away your mask and gave you a towel to wrestle in? That's a money maker, Dude.


    Orlando Jordan: I'm black and inbetween to white cats. That means trouble.


    Cups his mouth as he puts in his false teeth in.


    Dear mister president, I'd like to be a wrestler when I grow up and be able to millions.


    Randy Ortan: Some times you feel like a nut and sometimes you don't.


    Eddie: Hey vato if you ever put a scratch on one of these lowriders I'm breaking off the tag team.
    Tajiri: Ooooooohhh.

(edited by jwrestle on 5.7.03 2320)

This is getting annoying now isn't it?
Banned Once! The independant thought alarm went off, knew to much about b*tching.
Boudin blanc

Since: 11.5.03
From: Mount Pleasant, Pa.

Since last post: 2 hours
Last activity: 2 hours
#15 Posted on


    "I shit you not Brock, this is what they used for Stephanies implants."

    "This just got a hell of a lot better." - Stifler, American Pie

Since: 30.1.03
From: Upper Califia

Since last post: 3708 days
Last activity: 690 days
#16 Posted on
1) Who farted?
2) Who farted?
3) Who farted?
4) Who farted?
5) Who farted?
6) Who farted?
7) Who farted?
8) Who farted?

Since: 13.5.03
From: Woodbridge, VA

Since last post: 703 days
Last activity: 700 days
#17 Posted on
YO Vince! When I said I wanted to do some serious acting, this is not what I ment!

(Brock)So at the end of Titanic I cried. (Kurt) No wonder Curt Hennig wanted to kick your ass!

3) you have ANY burns on your body?
(Cena) So Taker, where did you find Bad News Brown at?

So Scott, Madajah called, she wants to know why your with Stacy now and not her?

In the middle of cutting a promo, Lance remembers he never told Jim Duggan that Team Canada ended in WCW and that Duggan is still waiting for Storm to call him with a mission!

Iam RIC FLAIR dammit and WWE have the audacity to but me with Triple Crap and Injury Boy?

(Eddie) You know Tajiri, this is our last time as a tag team? (Tajiri) I know, but today I am back pains so please don't throw me anywhere ok?

(edited by XPacArmy on 6.7.03 1329)

Shopkeeper: Take this object, but beware;it carries a terrible curse!
Homer: Oooh, that's bad.
Shopkeeper: But it comes with a free Frogurt!
Homer: That's good!
Shopkeeper: The Frogurt is also cursed.
Homer: That's bad.
Shopkeeper: But you get your choice of toppings!
Homer: That's good!
Shopkeeper: The toppings contain potassium benzoate.
[Homer looks puzzled.]
Shopkeeper: That's bad.
Homer: Can I go now?

Since: 6.8.02
From: St. Louis

Since last post: 73 days
Last activity: 39 days
#18 Posted on

    Originally posted by Kawshen
    You know the drill. Enjoy.


    At least my commercial is better then the Rock's crappy gettin cheffy wit it

    I got nipples Kurt, can you milk me?

    You know kitten if someone makes fun of you because the way you look, they aren't really your friend at all

    Are you ready to play some funky music white boys?

    Jericho: But Stacey has a surprise for you today Scott....that's right she is pregnant with Rick's baby!
    6) take one down then you pass it around, then there will be 92 bottles of beer on the wall

    Flair: All I'm saying is just because he dates Mango, does not mean he can't kick ass in the ring!

    Tajiri: Oh Eddie, I bet you say that to all your ethnically stereotyped tag team partners

    So I pranked death.....with a tire iron!

Since: 19.7.02
From: Trenton, NJ, USA

Since last post: 3147 days
Last activity: 2445 days
#19 Posted on


    Director: Um... Booker, since things haven't panned out as we had hoped, we've decided to replace you with a Champion. Christian!!
    Booker: Tell me you didn't say that.

    Kurt momentarily stops drinking his milk to confide to Brock to details of the night he and Stephanie entered the 'Love Chamber', better known as Room 814, after SummerSlam 2000.

    RVD: Say it Kane. Tell me I was right.
    KANE: Okay, okay! A warm moist towel does help me get a better shave. Happy now?

    Orlando Jones can't believe that he fell for the old 'Tell him it's a pool party and then pretend you don't notice his shock that it's actually a costume party' gag.

    Jericho: I knew you ate my last stick of gum. Give it back now, Steiner!

    Letter: Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to job the rest of your career away, with no hopes of ever garnering the respect that you deserve. This letter with self destruct faster than you can say 'Benoit'.

    Randy Orton and Ric Flair pay homage to their favorite SNL Characters-- "We're two WILD and CRAZY guys!"
    The look on Tajiri's face reminded Eddie of the same look that poor Mr. Bones' face had on the day he driven out to the woods and abandoned forever.

Peter The Hegemon
Lap cheong

Since: 11.2.03
From: Hackettstown, NJ

Since last post: 1 hour
Last activity: 1 hour
#20 Posted on

      Originally posted by Kawshen
      You know the drill. Enjoy.


      "Don't hate the dinner...HATE THE FORK!!!"

      "Kurt, could you pour me a glass of that Nathan Jones there?"

      "Our Zen koan for today: Kane is afraid to go out into the ring because he thinks people will dislike his scars, yet he has no scars. Meditate on this, my students."

      Neither Undertaker nor John Cena has any ideas on how he can get people to stop referring to him as "Orlando Jones".

      Scott Steiner is reluctant, but he knows he lost that hair vs. teeth match fair and square.

      A rare picture from Lance Storm's failed audition to be a WWE ring announcer.

      Sour Starburst! Use responsibly! Wooo!

      Shuttle to Enterprise, request permission to enter docking bay one, esse.

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I figure it's only a matter of time before someone's contract "expires" and they become a free agent.
- InVerse, Raw-Smackdown Trades (2003)
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