It reallys needs to be read to be believed. He has a lot to say considering he hasn't even seen the DVD. And all of it is the kind of crazy you can't make up.
And no one's safe! Vince, HHH, Bobby Heenan, among others all fall to the Warrior's power of written words!!
He's got some for Jim Ross too: "You seem to forget that there was once a ďbetterĒ day when talent didnít need their hands held, noses blown or picked, and their asses wiped, especially by a drooling gotta-get-closer-to-those-sweaty-wrestling-bodies feminine cowboy like you. Great talent knew what to do and did it, and they didnít run crying to numb-nut writers and out-of-control, head-tripping, power freak babysitters like yourself. You, Jimmie, are the one who needs to get a grip, not I. When I talk about the great career of the Ultimate Warrior, I do so with the authority of millions of minds filled with the great, on-the-record memories. Yet when you criticize it, your authority comes only from the fact that you have a cubicle at WWE offices and it has gone to your head. Youíve been sniffing too many of your own bean farts, Jimmie."
The two best parts of his rant are that he went FISHING in New Orleans cause "Fishing is exceptionally good down there right now." I hope he fishes with his face paint on, cause that would rule. But the BEST part is this:
Right now I donít intend to watch the DVD, but I can be sure that many of the thousands who come around here will rush to provide me the details. As I said, even now some of you are doing this, having already picked up the DVD at local WalMarts. I did receive the trailer, but my Macintosh didnít give me any picture, only the audio. It was obvious that even this little teaser is all lies born out of jealousy.
I can't believe Warrior is that bad at computing that he cant watch a video over the internet. I can only imagine him sitting at a computer screaming at how the internet screwed him.
Huh. Well, I guess he decided against taking the high road, huh? I think he could have made his point a little more effectively without sounding like an egomaniacal douchebag if he'd held off on capitalizing his personal pronouns. I obviously don't speak for everybody, but I only capitalize personal pronouns like "him" and "his" at the beginning of a sentence, or when I'm talking about God. Of course Warrior probably thinks he is God.
He did make an interesting point, though, one that I made in an earlier thread-- if Vince couldn't wait to fire him, why did he keep bringing him back? Why did he offer him tons of money to return, when he knew how unprofessional Warrior was? Mind you, I'm not trying to deny that Warrior was unprofessional.
The only conclusion I can come to is that despite Warrior's behavior, Vince believed that Warrior would still draw money, so what if nobody could stand the son of a bitch? I'd imagine that's the same reason he brought Hall, Nash and Hogan back, despite the fact that Hall has struggled with his personal demons for years and Nash and Hogan have well-earned reputations of being locker-room cancers. It's because Vince believed that the three of them would draw money, and hell, perhaps if the booking team had had any idea how to book the angle properly, they would have been extremely successful.
I guess it goes to show you that when it comes to Vince, there's no unpardonable sin you could commit as long as you get butts in the seats and people buying your merchandise. Which is probably why Randy Orton still has a job and Rhino doesn't, but let's not diverge from the topic.
ďGreat. He spends skill points on Perform (Kazoo), and now I have to make a Knowledge (Limits of My Own Sanity) skill check." --Roy Greenhilt, The Order of the Stick
Four-Time Wiener of the Day (5/27/02; 7/3/02; 7/30/04; 8/28/04)
The Only Five-Time (and Last) N.E.W. World Heavyweight Champion
Certified RFMC Member-- Ask To See My Credentials!
I'm sure there was a good point in there, but it's buried underneath a massive amount of egomania and childish insults.
The WWE was totally petty in their reasons for burying Ultimate Warrior on his DVD. However, he doesn't do much for his case by writing stuff like that. Actually, it helps me better understand where the guys on that DVD were coming from.
The answer to WWE's financial problems...
Never 'Wiener of the Day', and is actually quite bitter about it.
I still haven't picked up this DVD, but that was a great read. Regardless of if the Warrior came across as "classy" or not, it's always a hoot when you read something like this and the guy doesn't hold back, whether the points are valid or not.
I do tend to ebb more in the Warrior's direction when he speaks of his dealings with Vince McMahon, though there are always two sides to every story. I totally believe it when he says he had some guy track him down in New Mexico at 4:30am to get him back for WrestleMania 8. The fact is, Hogan's run was dwindling at the time and he was leaving the company, so Vince went after whoever he could to keep things going on TV. I think Vince needed a name more than Warrior really wanted to return.
But, everyone in this business (from what I hear) is two-faced to some degree and that's just the kind of crap that goes on, especially around Warrior's time and before WWE's "new era of professionalism."
And, yeah, the capitalizations of "He" and "Him" in reference to himself are hilarious.
Alright, after reading this, I have two observations.
1) Yes, Warrior has a large ego, and is kinda ....nuts.
2) I completely believe what he says regarding Vince and the "hire"/"fire" rant. They may be on bad terms now, but there's no denying that Vince kept bringing Warrior back to try and spark some fan interest.
EDIT: Oh, and the part where he tries to make it seem like the HHH/Stephanie marriage was a ploy by Vince to outdo the Warrior somehow is insane. He steps it a bit over the line when he starts saying maybe he should've gotten with Stephanie. Come on, man.
His condoscending advice to the young kids is funny at the end, with him basically saying "I don't mind helping you guys out, because you're pretty dumb and stupid".
AND....not sure if it's obvious or not, but it appears that part about fishing in New Orleans is a joke (at least I hope).
God there's too many good parts about this rant. Probably my favorite of all time.
That was the Ultimate shoot. I actually like the guy more than ever now. Referring to Jim Ross taking up the ass, and how Bobby Heenan dying of camcer is the result of karma for what a weasel he's been in the past, made me laugh alot. He has alot of cool stories and thoughts (insane one's mostly) but I strongly recommend eveyone read the full interview right away. I think it's the best shoot rant Ive heard in years.
Y'know, every time I see something from Mr. Warrior I'm reminded of that 60 MINUTES parody from SNL several years ago with Martin Short as the nervous, chain-smoking guy who is caught redhanded being a knucklehead and yet keeps telling the reporter, "I'm not nervous! You're the one that's nervous! It's him, right? Right? I'm not in trouble! You're the one that's in trouble! Right?"
Originally posted by Kane Is UglyThe two best parts of his rant are that he went FISHING in New Orleans cause "Fishing is exceptionally good down there right now." I hope he fishes with his face paint on, cause that would rule.
Did you click on the "fishing" picture he links to in his rant? If THAT doesn't say it all...
I watched the DVD last night. I don't think I've ever seen WWE go to this length to bury somebody. Wow.
The DVD is worth the price of admission just to hear Jericho's explanation of where "Parts Unknown" is, and to see Christian's imitation of a Warrior promo.
I do have to say that the sound mix on the disk is dreadful. It codes 5.1 on my receiver, but the voices are all across the front sound stage and often overwhelmed by the soundtrack. Not much low end either.
Originally posted by FurryHippieOh, and the part where he tries to make it seem like the HHH/Stephanie marriage was a ploy by Vince to outdo the Warrior somehow is insane.
According to him, anything that anyone does in public is only their attempt to be the warrior, copy the warrior, outdo the warrior, follow the warrior, etc.
This post-DVD rant of his (I read it top to bottom) is just like the last pre-DVD one: A couple minutes of good points drowned out by overly-worded, egomaniacal, delusional ramblings & name-calling that seemed to go on forever.
As far as the DVD goes, I also wached in disbelief that WWE would put so much time & effort into anything whose only purpose is to bury someone.
I also found it odd to watch & listen to WWE (Vince, Pritchard, & Co.) point out all of these wacky crazy things that Warrior was doing & saying as if it was him doing it all on his own. I mean, if he cuts a weird promo that no one understands, why not make him do it again? You cant just sit back & watch one of your employees go nuts about what planet he's from & how he feels the power of the Warriors running through his veins, etc, but never do anything about it while you have the chance, you know?
It was also odd to hear Hogan talk about Warrior's run in WCW & say that Warrior committed the ultimate sin (no pun intended) by cutting a promo in the ring mentioning that Warrior has beat him clean already, because this somehow tells the fans "This guy already beat him once, no need to pay to see that again!" Wasnt that the whole point to that angle? That Warrior was the only man to beat the unstoppable Hulk Hogan clean, so Hogan better be scared of him now??
Warrior calling HHH "puffy, little man" was the highlight of the piece. Aside from the Heenan, Grisham, Droz stuff, that was wonderfully entertaining, even if Warrior is whacked out of his gourd, w/ an grotesquely inflated sense of self-worth.
It seems clear to me that he expects people to be able to separate Warrior himself from Ultimate Warrior the character - whether his writing is "easy" enough to be digested in a way that accomplishes this separation is admittedly a matter of debate, but I don't mind that he doesn't want to dumb it down. The capitalised pronouns only refer to the character - why NOT hold it in reverence? It's taken him pretty far and made him a lot of money, and it would be understandable that he'd be the Ultimate Warrior's biggest fan.
I'm also glad he has a willingness to name names because it does a lot more to lend the ring of truth to what he's saying.
Still, I will say that PROBABLY he could have kept Bobby Heenan's colostomy bag out of it, though.
I absolutely cannot get enough of this. His rants are usually the stuff of genius and this one did not disappoint. I do worry about his growing fascination with testicles, especially Vince's supposed "three balls".
Originally posted by the Warrior in his masterpieceI mean, why would you throw away money you could earn from the millions of Warrior fans by turning the DVD into a joke? It seems Vince is going to make this DVD laughable so he can say ĎSee, UW doesn't draw, he doesn't sell!Ē
See, unfortunately, I wouldn't be tempted to buy this DVD if it was solely a look at his career since his matches (save the HTM one at SummerSlam and Hogan at WM VI) never entertained me. But knowing now that there are several WWE wrestlers doing impressions of him make this an insta-buy for me.
I just read the rant. Warrior is definitely nutty, but it did have a ring of truth to it. It is akin to Canseco's book. Yeah, the source is a bit bananas but what was said is somewhat true. Just one question, what did Heenan ever do to people. I had only heard of something happening with him and Tully Blanchard over some drugs. What else happened?
Originally posted by CRZIt seems clear to me that he expects people to be able to separate Warrior himself from Ultimate Warrior the character - whether his writing is "easy" enough to be digested in a way that accomplishes this separation is admittedly a matter of debate, but I don't mind that he doesn't want to dumb it down.
I got that, too, but it also struck me as really really odd, considering his entire career has been dedicated to claiming he is "the Ultimate Warrior" and that he can't be separated from the gimmick. This is, after all, the guy who legally changed his name to "Warrior."
Warrior's writing, of which I am a longtime fan, isn't "challenging" so much as "incoherent." As someone once told me of a pretentious writer on the decorative arts: "Just because you can write like that doesn't mean you should." This writer, whose name escapes me, has actually defended her turgid style, saying it was intended to alienate those who weren't bright or scholarly enough to follow it. Warrior would probably tell you the same thing, but it's pretty obvious he's doing it to impress you with how smart he is. A good writer just writes.
Originally posted by BigDaddyLocoI'm really interested in watching it, but I don't see it holding any repeat viewing intrest.
I highly disagree. I bought it last Thursday, and I've watched it maybe 4 times now. The jokes on it arent as funny anymore, but it's a really interesting DVD. Then again, I'm a pretty big mark for out-of-character & behind-the-scenes stuff in general, and not just the trash-talking either.
WHAT WORKED: Alot of the sports entertainment stuff worked for me this week. James Mitchell is fine as the worlds shittiest late night Horror Video host and I dug him as guy saying "roll the tape" thats fine use of him.