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21.9.14 0524
The W - Football - The Sports Guy at the SuperBowl
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rockdotcom_2.0
Frankfurter








Since: 9.1.02
From: Virginia Beach Va

Since last post: 549 days
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#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.37
I want this guys Job (espn.go.com)

Once again Bill Simmons is the worlds luckiest man. Im glad hes doing this blog, I miss his old columns before he went to L.A. I wouldnt be surprised if he quit doing ESPN after this quite honestly. Kimmel seems to be taking off, and his columns just arent nearly as good as they used to be, when he actually does one.


Anyway being in Houston, I REALLY REALLY hope he runs into Roger Clemens at a party or something. That may be the best Sports Guy column EVER.
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Broncolanche
Sujuk








Since: 2.6.03
From: Littleton, CO

Since last post: 1132 days
Last activity: 384 days
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.27
I'm hot & cold on Simmons myself--love his "ramblings" columns, can't stand him when he writes as a Boston homer.



EATIN' FRUIT AND BEING COOL
dunkndollaz
Banger








Since: 3.1.02
From: Northern NJ

Since last post: 10 days
Last activity: 1 day
#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.35
    Originally posted by Broncolanche
    I'm hot & cold on Simmons myself--love his "ramblings" columns, can't stand him when he writes as a Boston homer.


I went to college up in New England so Boston Homers are fun to laugh at and Simmons certainly allows those of us who don't worship Beantown sports a good laugh or two at his expense.....

I bet there are some yankee fans out there that wouldn't mind joining him in egging Clemens' House......and I feel his pain on the Jaclyn Smith miscue



5 Time 5 Time 5 Time 5 Time 5 Time Wiener of the Day Runner-up
Keeper
Italian
Moderator








Since: 1.3.02
From: Worcester, MA

Since last post: 357 days
Last activity: 1 day
#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.80
    Originally posted by rockdotcom_2.0
    His columns just arent nearly as good as they used to be


As a long time fan who used to read him on his old Digital City Boston site as far back as late '97, I would tell anyone who has first read him on EPSN.com, that you are not truly reading Bill Simmons in his forum (unedited/not towing the party line). I preferred the Boston only stuff, where he could rip on announcers and talk show hosts. It was damn funny, but it would be very esoteric for any one outise of this area. His columns were 10 times better on his old site.

Every time I see him redo one of them for Page2 I cannot help but think that he was selling out. Of course I would probably do the same for a nice high paying job at a major site.


And just a note, one thing that he always linked on his page was "Ask the Rick" every Thursday. Adjust judgment as you see fit

Edit: Stupid computer locked up, fixing spelling mistakes

(edited by Keeper on 27.1.04 2346)

Murphy's Law "The odds of the bread landing buttered side down are directly proportional to the price of the carpet."
Big Bad
Scrapple








Since: 4.1.02
From: Dorchester, Ontario

Since last post: 2 days
Last activity: 13 hours
#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.54
Man, if this is Simmons "selling out," then I'd hate to see him when he's in his prime, as you say. His columns are weekly sources of hilarity for both myself and several friends I've turned on to his work. I won't lie; a new Sports Guy column on Friday usually results in myself or a friend MSNing each other to quote our favourite bits from it.

In other Simmons-related news, BILLY ZABKA got nominated for a freakin' Oscar! Check out the Live Action Short category....he co-wrote and co-produced "Most."



Wait…if it’s MLK Jr. Day AND Pat Patterson’s Birthday…who gets the token win here?-- Matt "Excalibur05" Hocking on a match between Mark Henry and Rico

MH: What’s a clever way to say that I have a penis?
CJ: Uh…Mark, nobody’s going to buy that shirt.
MH: How about if I say that I’ve got…a…uh…?
CJ: Coming up with T-Shirt ideas is hard Mark, why not leave it to the WWE marketing department.
MH: I know! I’ve got it!
CJ: Got what?
MH: Stank! That’s Mah Stank! I’m gonna make a fortune!!
CJ: “That’s Mah Stank”?
MH: On the front it’ll say “Can You Smell It?” and on the back it’ll say “That’s Mah Stank”. Everybody’ll buy it because they’ll think it’s a Rock shirt.
CJ: You know…you might be on to something there, sad to say.
MH: I can’t wait to show mah stank to Trish.

You know, I have a feeling that Spanky didn’t quit, he was fired. Why? So they could repackage Mark Henry as “Stanky.” Think about THAT!
--Matt "Excalibur05" Hocking, 1/19/04 Raw Satire


BOSsportsfan34
Pepperoni








Since: 2.1.03
From: MA

Since last post: 16 days
Last activity: 10 days
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Y!:
#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.59
    Originally posted by Keeper
    And just a note, one thing that he always linked on his page was "Ask the Rick" every Thursday. Adjust judgment as you see fit




I used to email him every so often during his old DigitalCity days and pretty much got responses back from him most of the time. I emailed him once telling him that Rick was overrated and wasn't worth him linking to his columns. I never got a response back from him on that one.

Hey, no one's perfect.



Believe me, I'm not defending message boards -- they can be evil places
ESPN.com's Bill Simmons

chuckc14
Summer sausage








Since: 2.1.02
From: Nashville

Since last post: 3147 days
Last activity: 1535 days
#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.22
The reason Bill Simmons is the greatest...Pure bitterness. I know his pain all too well. From his latest blog...

"On Monday night, they threw a huge celebration at the Reliant Center, capped off by Nolan Ryan symbolically passing a football to Roger Clemens, who was standing a few feet away. Sadly, Ryan can't throw 100 mph anymore. Alas. Clemens caught the ball, searched it to make sure there wasn't any cash stuffed inside, told the football that he would never throw it to anyone else because he wanted to retire with the football, then threw it to his buddy Andy Pettitte. And everyone went crazy. Apparently it was a great moment -- I couldn't see it that well with the blood pouring out of my eyes."



13-3 (2-3) - Lousy road games...
Next: Wed. vs. South Carolina
BWT
Boerewors








Since: 27.1.04
From: Philly

Since last post: 3159 days
Last activity: 2763 days
AIM:  
#8 Posted on
How on earth could he not know about the NBA allstar fan fest thing? Other then that his superblog has been great and some of his best work since he got the Kimmel job.
Joseph Ryder
Head cheese








Since: 19.3.02
From: Seattle, WA

Since last post: 1166 days
Last activity: 699 days
#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.22
    Originally posted by Big Bad
    In other Simmons-related news, BILLY ZABKA got nominated for a freakin' Oscar! Check out the Live Action Short category....he co-wrote and co-produced "Most."


If Bill Simmons stopped writing columns tomorrow, I'd go to the grave thinking his recap of the Karate Kid trilogy was one of the funniest things ever written. I admit though, that I'm in Cali and have never seen any pre-ESPN stuff. Still, I imagine this HAS to rank up there.

The full column (espn.go.com)

Sneak peek below...

    Originally posted by Bill Simmons
    "The Karate Kid, Part III" is a huge hit ... on the Unintentional Comedy Scale. Fortunately, if there was a Hall of Fame for "Enjoyably Bad Movies," "KKIII" would probably have its own wing. Ralph Macchio returns as the college-age Daniel, which would have been fine except for the fact that he weighs about 200 pounds, he's at least 35 years old, and he has suddenly and inexplicably developed a Charles Barkley-sized rear end. Just the sight of him wearing jeans is enough to crack up an entire room. I've seen it happen.

    Since it wouldn't be a Karate Kid movie unless someone was trying to ruin Daniel-San's life, they created a plot centering around the millionaire friend of Creese, who fell on hard times after Zabka lost the All-Valley Karate Championship. Blaming Daniel-San, The Rich Guy (played in career-ending fashion by Thomas Ian Griffith) develops an elaborate plan to deceive Daniel and Mr. Miyagi, hoping to eventually destroy both of them. Honestly, I wish he had.

    Some lingering questions and thoughts from 95 delightfully unappealing minutes ...

    * Why did The Rich Guy devote weeks of his life to destroying Daniel-San and Mr. Miyagi? Didn't he have anything more important on his plate than bringing down a teenage karate champion? Was he saying to himself, "You know, I feel pretty good about my stock holdings this month. ... I think I'll take some time off and browbeat an 18-year-old kid"? We might never know.
    * Once The Rich Guy started training Daniel-San, why didn't Daniel realize that his new sensei was evil, especially when his training regimen consisted of instructions like "Punch these wooden boards with your bare hands until they start bleeding"?

    What was he thinking? Seriously, what was he thinking? Was there a bigger loser in the history of Hollywood lead characters than Daniel-San? And does this explain why so many people went out of their way to antagonize him? Do you realize that, in the span of 12 months, this kid was terrorized by three different groups of people in two different countries. What were the odds? Couldn't this kid catch a break? Was he really that bad?
wordlife
Head cheese








Since: 4.4.03

Since last post: 3329 days
Last activity: 2613 days
#10 Posted on | Instant Rating: 10.00
    Originally posted by Joseph Ryder
      Originally posted by Big Bad
      In other Simmons-related news, BILLY ZABKA got nominated for a freakin' Oscar! Check out the Live Action Short category....he co-wrote and co-produced "Most."


    If Bill Simmons stopped writing columns tomorrow, I'd go to the grave thinking his recap of the Karate Kid trilogy was one of the funniest things ever written. I admit though, that I'm in Cali and have never seen any pre-ESPN stuff. Still, I imagine this HAS to rank up there.

    The full column (espn.go.com)

    Sneak peek below...

      Originally posted by Bill Simmons
      "The Karate Kid, Part III" is a huge hit ... on the Unintentional Comedy Scale. Fortunately, if there was a Hall of Fame for "Enjoyably Bad Movies," "KKIII" would probably have its own wing. Ralph Macchio returns as the college-age Daniel, which would have been fine except for the fact that he weighs about 200 pounds, he's at least 35 years old, and he has suddenly and inexplicably developed a Charles Barkley-sized rear end. Just the sight of him wearing jeans is enough to crack up an entire room. I've seen it happen.

      Since it wouldn't be a Karate Kid movie unless someone was trying to ruin Daniel-San's life, they created a plot centering around the millionaire friend of Creese, who fell on hard times after Zabka lost the All-Valley Karate Championship. Blaming Daniel-San, The Rich Guy (played in career-ending fashion by Thomas Ian Griffith) develops an elaborate plan to deceive Daniel and Mr. Miyagi, hoping to eventually destroy both of them. Honestly, I wish he had.

      Some lingering questions and thoughts from 95 delightfully unappealing minutes ...

      * Why did The Rich Guy devote weeks of his life to destroying Daniel-San and Mr. Miyagi? Didn't he have anything more important on his plate than bringing down a teenage karate champion? Was he saying to himself, "You know, I feel pretty good about my stock holdings this month. ... I think I'll take some time off and browbeat an 18-year-old kid"? We might never know.
      * Once The Rich Guy started training Daniel-San, why didn't Daniel realize that his new sensei was evil, especially when his training regimen consisted of instructions like "Punch these wooden boards with your bare hands until they start bleeding"?

      What was he thinking? Seriously, what was he thinking? Was there a bigger loser in the history of Hollywood lead characters than Daniel-San? And does this explain why so many people went out of their way to antagonize him? Do you realize that, in the span of 12 months, this kid was terrorized by three different groups of people in two different countries. What were the odds? Couldn't this kid catch a break? Was he really that bad?




That was a great one!!!!!! My favorite part of the article is when he talks about calling up the video store for KKII



"This is RAW, man...not an episode of The OC" Christian
rockdotcom_2.0
Frankfurter








Since: 9.1.02
From: Virginia Beach Va

Since last post: 549 days
Last activity: 164 days
AIM:  
#11 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.77
Well after a promising start to his week of Blogs I was sick of his whiny shit by the end of the week. I want to agree with Jag who said in the congrats thread said what a complete prick Simmons turned into. And I can remember how happy I was for him when the Pats won two years ago. That was a fun bunch of columns to read. He was having fun and it showed. This past week he just sounded like a bitter Yankees fan who whines when their team doesnt get the "respect" they think they deserve. Plus his whining about Houston all week got OLD. Yes the weather sucks, but how many guys get to have both their amazing cool jobs send them to the Super Bowl all expenses paid? Sports Guy ver 2001 appreciated that. Sports guy ver 2003 has gone all LA on us. I cant really blame him, hes writing for Kimmel and he got married, plus living in LA does things to you. I hope he hangs it up soon, I really do. ESPECIALLY after he skipped the MAXIM party! INEXCUSABLE.


Whitebacon
Boudin blanc








Since: 12.1.02
From: Fresno, CA

Since last post: 35 days
Last activity: 2 hours
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ICQ:  
#12 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.38
Well, BSG v.2001 got sent to New Orleans. BSG v.2003 got sent to Houston, I can see where he'd be let down.





In the context of baseball, the use of drugs hurts only the player. In the context of baseball, the use of alcohol hurts only the player. In the context of baseball, womanizing hurts whom? Maybe the wife of the player? In the context of baseball, felonies are crimes against society, not against baseball. In the context of baseball, gambling is the only crime against baseball.

Gambling, in the context of baseball, is a capital offense and Rose has richly earned-- hell, he agreed to-- his death sentence. Let him hang.

Bob Kohm, co-owner of Rotojunkies.com (rotojunkies.com) , and a large market kind of guy.
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http://sports.espn.go.com/ nfl/news/story?id=1749826 But Galloway might be waived, regardless.
- The Amazing Salami, What's next for Jeff Garcia? (2004)
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