I take 3 whole days off from The W, and when I come back, Bradshaw got fired from CNBC, and Lita is pregnant?! WWE is nuts. It's time for The Great Thomas SmackDown! Report!
LAST WEEK: Paul Heyman asked Undertaker to join him.
Mr. Angle: Mr. Angle shows us footage of last week, when Cena and Booker fell on him. Mr. Angle won't start the show until Booker and Cena apologize. Michael Cole sounds whinier than usual. Booker comes out first and is very apologetic. He even says "I'm sorry" FIVE TIMES! Angle accepts his apologies. Cena comes out next. He wants to bash Mr. Angle's head in. Mr. Angle convinces him to put down the chain. Mr. Angle says that he talked to the Board of Directors, and Cena is now on probation! Also, tonight, Cena will face three 5-minute matches against three opponents. And, whoever beats Cena, will fight Cena at the Great American Bash for the US Title!
Kenzo Suzuki: Coming up NEXT!
Suzuki vs. Scotty: Kenzo's carried out seated on a throne. Barrage of chops to Scotty 2 Hotty. BIG BOOT! SUPERKICK by Scotty! But Suzuki hits an STO for the win!
Access Hollywood: Arnold Schwarzenegger passed the torch to The Rock as the spokesman for Afterschool All-Stars.
Clear Eyes: Ben Stein says it's "awesome".
GM Room: Cena's three opponents are with Mr. Angle. He's gonna have them draw straws to choose who Cena will wrestle first.
Undertaker: He broods.
Herr Bradshaw: He goes to a swanky five-star salon for a manicure, shoe-shine, and facial.
Parking Lot: Herr Bradshaw steps out of the limo, but he thinks Long Island stinks (literally), so he decides to go back to New York City. Inside the limo, he tells the driver to go, but the driver is unresponsive. Herr Bradshaw gets mad, and yells at the driver, until he finds out that Eddie Guerrero is the driver! Eddie wants to go for a joyride, so he drives off at high speed, with Herr Bradshaw in the back! "We're going for a ride, and it's gonna be better than Disneyland, holmes!"
Earlier Today: Paul Heyman and the Dudleys are drinking. Heyman's worried that without Paul Bearer to control Undertaker, he might go too far. Heyman leaves to confront Undertaker.
Mysterio vs. New Chavo: Chavo Classic (with groupies) comes out to do Guest Commentary. Classic tells Cole that the rumors of him paying off his groupies are untrue. Mysterio hits a FLYING CROSS BODY on New Chavo outside the ring! Chavo Classic is concerned. Let's go to commercial break!
Kenny Rogers: The Gambler: His chicken isn't too good, but his macaroni-and-cheese tastes great!
Mysterio vs. New Chavo (cont.): HUGE DROPKICK by New Chavo! MOONSAULT by Mysterio! Chavo Classic goes insane. Closeup of Chavo Classic's bald spot. BT BOMB is foiled! Mysterio hits the 6-1-9! Chavo Classic screws up interference, allowing Mysterio to hit the WEST COAST POP for the win! New Chavo and Chavo Classic argue.
RAW Rebound: Kane pins Benoit, and HBK brawls with Triple H.
Parking Lot: Two guys clean up the garbage caused by Eddie's limo rampage. Suddenly, Herr Bradshaw's limo reappears, and smashes into everything in the vicinity before driving off again!
Afterwards: Eddie drives the smashed up limo onstage. Inside, Herr Bradshaw has passed out from shock. Cole jokes around. Herr Bradshaw stumbles out of the limo. Eddie says that at the Great American Bash, Herr Bradshaw's gonna end up like his limo. Herr Bradshaw cries over his limo.
Passport to Pain: Nunzio, Rico, and Haas were loved in Italy. Also, much goosesteppin' was done in Germany.
Triple Play Challenge: Cena vs. Booker T: Mr. Angle emerges from the Earth to watch the match. There's a 5-minute timer on the Titantron. SUPERKICK by Booker T! KNEEDROP! Mr. Angle looks at his watch. FLAPJACK by Booker T! SCISSORS KICK is foiled! SUPLEX by Booker T! Time runs out before Booker hits another Scissors Kick, so he loses. Cena's next opponent is Rob Van Dam! Let's go to commercial break!
Triple Play Challenge: Cena vs. RVD: RVD jumps off the ring, and is met with a CLOTHESLINE by Cena! F-U is foiled. 2 minutes left. SPLIT-LEGGED MOONSAULT by RVD! RVD tries to go for a FIVE-STAR FROGSPLASH, but Booker racks RVD up! This makes Mr. Angle angry, and he throws Booker out! RVD succesfully hits the FIVE-STAR this time, but time runs out. Mr. Angle is disappointed. Let's go to commercial break!
Triple Play Challenge: Cena vs. Duprée: René Duprée leaves Fifi with Luthor. Abdominal Stretch by Duprée. Cena counters with a hiptoss. Mr. Angle is flustered. 3 minutes left. Backbreaker by Duprée. Cena comes back, but the two collide. 2 minutes left. Cena hits the FIVE-KNUCKLE SHUFFLE! F-U is reversed into a SPINEBUSTER! But Cena won't stay down! Time runs out! Duprée begs for 5 more minutes... and Angle gives them to him! Duprée dances the FRENCH TICKLER! But Cena hits the F-U for the win! Afterwards, Booker T runs in to beat down Cena, but RVD runs in to make the save! Mr. Angle tells Cena that at the Great American Bash, Cena will defend his US Title against Booker T, RVD, and Duprée in a Fatal Four-Way. Cena tells RVD that he'll retain his title. RVD responds by kicking Cena in the temple!
Undertaker's Desicion: The Titantron says thet Heyman is SmackDown! GM. YOU FUCKED UP! YOU FUCKED UP! Heyman says that this will be where history will change forever. He calls out Undertaker. Taker comes out. Heyman pulls out the urn. Undertaker bows to Heyman. And...we're out.
That's all for this week. Until then, Good Night, take care of yourselves, and this was a decent SmackDown! And the best part is, my VCR didn't screw up again! Huzzah!
Was umpiring a Little League game, so I began watching at the very end of the Suzuki match....Bradshaw's segment where he gets all "prettied up" felt like it went on forever....Gotta love the camera inside the limo....Chavo v.s Rey was pretty good, and with Chavo Classic on commentary, it made it even better....Good segment with Eddy/JBL/Limo....
I just really didn't dig the whole Triple Play series. Dupree v.s Cena was probably the best out of the bunch. I think it was pretty obvious where they were going with it after the first match. At least they're playing up the US Title....How long does it take for 'Taker to get to the ring?....My dad said Heyman reminded him of Jim Belushi. Not sure if that's good or bad....The show-ending angle certainly opened up a lot of possibilities for the future.
Wow, pretty much a giant upsurge of apathy about the show here, eh? Not that that means anything ... (Vince, are you listening?)
At this point, opening SD with extended talking segments is a very bad idea. Wrestling -- remember, the middle "W" in WWE?
Suzuki: Big, extended entrance. I assume the geisha is his real-world wife -- suprised there hasn't been some enthusiasm about her. I was giggling about the non-experianecd litter-bearers threatening to drop the thing -- that was good for a chuckle.
The biggest problem with the big-build-ups is that I (at least) expect *something* when the guy actually appears. I watched the match a second time, just to confirm the unsettling feeling that Suzuki did not do *one* thing in that match that *I* couldn't do. I've done karate, & can quite capably kick Scotty-height people in the head. He didn't even take a bump -- stagger to one knee was the closest thing. Snarl-snarl, grr-grr. We didn't even hold the vertical "delayed" suplex before Scotty "countered" it. What here should have made me go "Wow!"???
On the other hand, Scotty did a really nice job selling!
Eddie taking over Bradshaw's limo was rife with possibilities, & a bit of demolition derby can be fun, but there was so much more they could have done.
Paul Heyman is excellent. He's making the Dudley's interesting again. When he does a bunch of exposition, it's actually *interesting*. And when was the last time we saw the Dudleys in street clothes?
Chavo Classic is great fun. Having Chavito on commentary last week during Chavo's match was good, & having Classic on commentary during Chavito's match was good. Entertaining match between Chavito & Rey. OK, things are looking up!
But... it's about a half an hour later til we get to the next wrestling, & my interest has faded again. Cena vs. everybody, with vague rules. Oh-kay. Truth be told, I kept drifting off. Nothing intrinsically wrong with the wrestling itself. But we know Cena's not going to lose to either of the first 2 guys, without even seeing the third. So, standard 5 minutes with Booker, standard 5 minutes with RVD. Probably wasn't as good an idea as it seemed to keep showing Kurt checking his watch -- for me it was more, "are we done yet?" than drama-inducing. Booker interfering with RVD was a nice variant, although we didn't really "use" that inside the match. I thought Cena & Dupree clicked the best, & that had my interest -- it was kind of fun to watch how many near falls Rene got in in the last 10 seconds. Everything after the FU & pin -- eh.
Heyman / Taker was very good, although a little thunder/lightning/rain would have been a nice touch.
So, one fun wrestling match, one half-boring, half-interesting wrestling match, and ... a whole lot of flashbacks, recaps, bla-bla.
Yeah, for having Kenzo Suzuki NOT be Hirohito, the entrance and all sure made it look like he was being all imperial. Add to that Tazz and Cole talking about "his ancestors" and his regal bearing, and you're left with just a name change. As for his wrestling - man, that is some pretty slow offense he has.
Emma - his wife is WAY too made-up. I mean, I like a little pale skin - but I like skin, not paint. (And she wasn't all that hot to boot.)
To put Undertaker/Heyman in the main event spot was stupid. My non-watching friends were all "What's happening?" to which I could only respond "I don't know - I normally fastforward through this stuff."
Color me non-plussed. And, yeah, the supreme apathy on The W about Smackdown! lately is bad. When apathy wins, the program has lost.
"ScreamingHeadGuy, don't fear the wang. Know the wang. Embrace the wang. BE the wang....." - heed the wisdom of DEAN
-Angle/Booker/Cena interview- Angle wants an apology, Booker gives 5 times. Cena doesn't. Cena is on probation. Then says Cena later tonight will have to wrestle three guys in a row with accompanied goofy looking pictures up on the screen of Booker T, Dupree and RVD... I didn't mind this interview, even though I'd agree with most this Kurt is a far cry from his regular greatness, his delivery is still good. Booker saying he can't sleep for 3 days was fun as well.
-Suzuki vs. Scotty2Hotty- Good eye Emma like usual, that guy in the front struggling to keep his end up did get a chuckle out of me. Scotty got 20 seconds of offense that looked more impressive then Suzuki even though it wasn't much... Looks like Suzuki kinda Suzsucks. So how long before the geisha girl pulls a Torrie Wilson and shows her independent feminist strength and break free of the evil clutches of Japanese male sexist traditions by removing her kimono and parading in her bra and panties for the good of the American male. I give it 3 weeks
-Mysterio vs. Chavo Jr- What the! A very entertaining segment with a nice worked match that went a while. On Smackdown! You don't say. Rey and Chavo Jr. pulled out all the stops, it certainly was a plus for Smackdown...Chavo Classic was funny on mic, and showed some confidence. But then again with those babes around his shoulder who wouldn't be.
-Eddie/Layfield interview- One problem with SD as a whole is that interesting character are no longer that interesting. Eddie really falls in that list. It's a shame but in the last month this angle made me really uncare about Eddie at all... I think all the racial stuff doesn't fly with me at all, it's not that I'm on a soapbox calling it offensive, I just find it really boring.
-Cena vs. Booker- Booker T has to go first because he picked out the short straw. Stacking the deck against the.. WCW guy(ha you thought I was going racial). Not a bad match but giving Booker 5-minutes to beat John Cena seems a little counter-productive for Booker.... But I guess Angle doesn't really care about who defeats Cena but as long as someone beats him.
-Cena vs. RVD- HA RVD takes his sweet time to get down there as Angle screams at him to hurry up and get there. RVD comes from the second rope with a side kick but gets met with a wicked clothesline OUCH! I thought this match was good as well, RVD looked like he went for multiple 5 Star splash attempts but Cena keeps rolling out of his sights as RVD has to go with plan B top rope move. RVD goes to the top near the end but Booker was still hanging around ringside and knock RVD down. Kurt yelled at Booker to get out of the ring "Once again picking on the.. WCW guy. RVD does get the advantage and hits the 5 Star but the 5-minute ran out... I thought this was probably the best out of the 3 matches. It was interesting seeing the fans not really knowing who to cheer for.
-Cena vs. Dupree- They had some strange collations during this match. Cena ran to Dupree as Rene was suppose to catch him and give him a powerslam but looks like he didn't catch all of him and threw him strangely. Dupree tried to go for all sort of pin variations but Cena kept squirming out. Dupree wants 5 more minutes, Angle said Okay. Dupree takes Cena down, France Prance. Cena gets up and Dupree went for a clothesline but Cena counters to an FU for pin? Sorry the FU just doesn't look like an instant finisher... Kurt's upset, Booker runs out and attacks Cena some more, RVD comes for the save and runs the heels out. Angle states that the U.S title will be challenged in a fatal four way match with the four men who were in the ring. RVD likes the idea of having some gold around his waist, Cena not so crazy about that idea. RVD responds with a kick to Cena jaw as Kurt smirks.
-Heyman/Undertaker interview- Heyman is such a sales man he can hard sell anything. Even a real badly played storyline. So I'm guessing the Urn is only symbolism and Undertaker isn't *really* controlled buy the urn... Why exactly should I care about Paul Bearer, how many appearances did Paul Bearer even do on SD and most of the time if you blink you missed him. He's been a non-factor to the Undertaker for the longest time and even when he was there since this return to Old school I was surprised they did bring Bearer back because I thought the Undertaker character has by passed having a chubby little manager with an urn around him.
-OtherStuff- Arrrrrnold passes the charity torch to The Rock... Angle asks Booker, RVD and Dupree to choose straws but Luther sends the camera man out, You're exposing the fourth wall, THE FOURTH WALL... Layfield is being pampered by foreigners. Drives into the arena but doesn't feel like working so goes back into the limo and asks the driver to go home. "Where too Stephanie!" (oh wait that was an old Undertaker angle) It's Eddie as he's going to take JBL for a ride...
Eddie drives back as people backstage were CLEANING!... Undertaker backstage and he's THINKING!... Dudley's & Heyman are backstage and they're DRINKING. D'von got some bussoms going... WWE shows clips of another successful, non-controversial, fun Fun FUN overseas tour.
-Line of the Night: Tazz "A spine-chilling entrance".. Cole "Especially spine-chilling tonight" - Wow thanks Cole. -3Stars of the Night: 1)Rey. 2)Chavo Jr. 3)RVD.
I thought the show was okay, the Chavo/Rey match was entertaining, don't really know what it leads too (Chavo vs. Chavo, I guess). The Cena 3 match was decent... But I stop caring for the World title feud. Suzuki was as unimpressive as you can and Mordecia was left on the editing floor already? Heyman cuts a good promo & it is interesting how they are going to pull a Undertaker heel, I doubt it's a full fledge heel.
smark/net attack wienerville advisory stays at BLUE alert - Guarded (With Benoit & Eddie being World & WWE champions you'd expect all's be right but couldn't do it due to Trish/Y2J character switches & whats the deal with JBL PPV main event)- 5/6
I remember reading somewhere that Mordecai's match with Paul London was never supposed to air on SmackDown. They only did it because the tapings had a lot of dead spots in between segments, so they sent those two out there to fill in one of those dead spots.
The answer to WWE's financial problems...
Never 'Wiener of the Day', and is actually quite bitter about it.
Originally posted by OMEGAI remember reading somewhere that Mordecai's match with Paul London was never supposed to air on SmackDown. They only did it because the tapings had a lot of dead spots in between segments, so they sent those two out there to fill in one of those dead spots.
I have never been to a Smackdown taping, so I was under the impression that it was a fast paced show, since they dont even need to stop for commercial breaks. Apparently, that is not the case. They tape it and just put it all together later for airing on TV, so why are these dead spots even needed?
Lloyd: When I met Mary, I got that old fashioned romantic feeling, where I'd do anything to bone her. Harry: That's a special feeling.
"Jericho tries for the Walls of Jericho early on, but it is blocked by mysterious rays from Shawn Michaels while a message on the Titantron says, 'This move is mine now.' " -RAW Satire, 05.10.04
Originally posted by samoflangeI have never been to a Smackdown taping, so I was under the impression that it was a fast paced show, since they dont even need to stop for commercial breaks. Apparently, that is not the case. They tape it and just put it all together later for airing on TV, so why are these dead spots even needed?
Because the crowd would be pretty pissed to have paid $40 for a show that was only a half-hour long? OK, an hour, including Velocity taping & dark matches. That's the "smartass but still mostly true" answer. The broadcast SD usually is usually (say) 90-95% identical to what you see live. They have the option to do fix-ups & editing, but they tend to only use that when things get botched pretty badly. I'm sure it's quicker/easier in the editing process to do it that way. (After all, they don't even have 2 full days to whatever editing they need.) They handle commercial breaks the same way as Raw does. (The one *plus* of this is all those hideously annoying Adbreak interferences on TV generally are continued wrestling matches for the live audience. So 2 minutes before the commercial plus 3 minutes after can actually be a continuous 9 minute match live.) I also assume that it's the same video/production crew that does Raw & PPVs live -- running througn the show in "real time" is just the way they're used to working & timing things -- it's probably easier for them too. And the third thing is crowd pacing -- I'm thinking it feels more "realistic" if they stay pretty much the same.
I guess the dead spots are there so as to make post-production easier. I attended a SmackDown taping back in September (the one with the Angle/Lesnar Iron-Man match), and the commercial breaks were actually pretty quick. However, in this show's case, the spots were going on for a long time. So, I'm guessing that they may have been behind schedule or having production problems. It's just a case of mistakes being made (who could forget the story of The Demon being locked in his casket for 45-minutes during a Thunder taping?).
(edited by OMEGA on 13.6.04 1551)
The answer to WWE's financial problems...
Never 'Wiener of the Day', and is actually quite bitter about it.
I finally got around to watching a tape of Smackdown and it was better then recent weeks. Kurt Angle is better berating John Cena then Eddie Guerrero for some reason. Maybe it's because you know it's not leading to something with Bradshaw involved?
Kenzo Suzuki still sucks. Did they not watch a tape or have him tryout or anything? He couldn't get over with a mega push in Japan and he won't in America. What's the over/under on him jobbing to Billy Gunn on Velocity? 3 weeks?
If you're going to hype someone so much they better be able to deliver or the fans won't buy into the next guy you hype. It worked with Mysterio. It worked with Ultimo for the first match and then they decided he couldn't work. It didn't work for O'Haire or Mordecai or Suzuki because there's nothing there once the bell rings.
The Mysterio/Chavos stuff was the best stuff on the show. Mysterio should be doing a lot more but Bruce Prichard seems to have more power on that show now and he hates small guys. I'm waiting for the Chavos to turn on each other then for one of them to run to Eddie for help only to get laughed at.
I may be one of the few people but I like The Undertaker/Paul Heyman storyline. I said it a week or two ago but they should run with it for a little while and use it for a Guerrero/Undertaker Main Event. You can blow the storyline off there and have Guerrero go over while Taker can make himself happy by squashing The Dudleys for revenge.
On no less than FIVE websites this morning, I have read comments or recaps from people that have no idea what a popcorn fart is. This amazes me. Maybe it is a southern thing. Popcorn fart has two possible meanings: a)