The W
Views: 132004831
Main | FAQ | Search: Y! / G | Calendar | Color chart | Log in for more!
21.4.18 0645
The W - Pro Wrestling - The Great Thomas SmackDown! Report 5/6/04
This thread has 31 referrals leading to it
Register and log in to post!
Thread rated: 4.51
Pages: 1
(7755 newer) Next thread | Previous thread
Post (11 total)
The Great Thomas

Since: 17.6.02
From: Miami, Florida

Since last post: 4652 days
Last activity: 4652 days
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.13
Oh, look. "Friends" is ending tonight. Now Vince has something to blame for this week's low ratings instead of the fact that SmackDown! is a cesspool of boredom! It's time for The Great Thomas SmackDown! Report!

LAST WEEK: D-Von was a better wrestler than Bubba, and we learned that the French Army throws women in harm's way.

Michael Cole: He's in the ring to tell us that Eddie's mom suffered his a heart attack. We see footage from a house show, where he calls in his wife and kids. Kisses and flowers are given. Then he brings in Mama Guerrero. More hugs and kisses. Then, Bradshaw ATTAX! CLOTHESLINE FROM HELL to Eddie! BELTSHOT! Then he focuses on Mama Guerrero. VULCAN NERVE GRIP! Mama has a heart attack. Bradshaw flees, and the EMTs attend to Mama. The fans are in shock. "SHE'S HARDCORE!" chant. Mama is strechered out with an oxygen mask.

Cole & Tazz: They're visually shell shocked. Let's go to commercial break!

Cena vs. Doug Basham: Thugonomics. Incest jokes are made. Bigger WHAT than Mary-Kate and Ashley? HOLY SHIT! Cena calls them the Five Moves of Doom! It's catching on! Sleeper holds galore! SPINNINGOUT POWERBOMB by Cena! Cena wins via FIVE MOVES OF DOOM! Cole says "Runé-Tenay Dupreé".

YJ Stinger: Wow. Eddie still shills the bees, even though his mother's in the hospital. What a trooper.

Booker T: He's at a voodoo store. The store propietor, "Mama Sangre" welcomes him. Mama Sangre looks into the crystal ball, and says that a "dead man" is coming for him. Booker asks her for help. She gives him a bag with "nails from the coffin of a condemned man, and the fangs of a three-legged dog." The only thing Booker needs now is dirt from the grave of a man with no name. [insert Ed Leslie joke here] Booker asks where is he gonna find this special grave. Mama Sangre tells him that it'll find him.

Chavo the Younger vs. The World: Chavo Sr. wants to be known as "Chavo Classic" now. So, who's the mystery opponent? JACQUELINE, THAT'S WHO! Los Chavos laugh it up. Junior wonders if this is a joke. Jacquie ain't budgin'. She slaps Chavo, and IT'S ON! ARMBAR by Chavo. HEADSCISSORS by Jaquie! DROPKICK! BACKDROP by Chavo! LOW BLOW by Jacquie! ROLLUP! 1.. 2.. 3! NEW CHAMP! NEW CHAMP! Los Chavos are aghast!

Who Are You?: "Gravity Gun, Spider Pod, and Delta Bomb." When I buy Custom Robo, I'm gonna have to try that.

Mr. Angle: He comes out to tell the fans that he's dissapointed in them. He says that none of the SmackDown! superstars wanted to face the Undertaker. So, he's forcing the F.B.I. to wrestle the Undertaker... RIGHT NOW!

F.B.I. vs. Undertaker: Cole has another orgasm. Taker squashes everyone in a 5-mile radius. OLD SCHOOL to Stamboli! TAKER CARE OF BUSINESS! Stamboli taps! Taker's not done yet. LAST RIDE to Nunzio. TOMBSTONE to Stamboli! Michael Cole says Booker T better say his prayers.

Meanwhile...: Booker's at the graveyard. He finds the unmarked grave. He puts some of the dirt into his voodoo pouch, then he leaves. But then, a hand pops out of the grave! OMG ED LESLIE LIVES!

Backstage: Josh Matthews is outside of Eddie Guerrero's locker room. We see the same footage from before. Josh asks Eddie if he blames Bradshaw, or if he blames himself. Eddie damn near spontaneously combusts. Josh (wisely) backs off.

Torrie vs. Dawn Marie: René and Fifi sit at ringside. René tries to interfere, but gets foiled by Cena. But René fights back, and dominates Cena. René tears apart the announce table. TV MONITOR to Cena's gut. Then, René POWERBOMBS CENA THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE! Finally, he drapes the French flag over Cena's corpse. "You can't see me, Cena!"

During Break: René's attack continues. René throws a chair at Cena!

Cole & Tazz: Mama Guerrero only had a mild heart attack, and she's out of the hospital, and at home in "Guarded" condition. Cole and Tazz look like hobos sitting next to the announce table wreckage.

John Bradshaw Layfield: He's in New York City. He says that Eddie had no right to bring his family into the ring. He won't apologise. "Like Eddie Guerrero's title reign, this interview is over!"

Backstage: Paul Heyman pleads with Mr. Angle not to put Eddie against the Dudleys, since Eddie's current state of mind could get the Dudleys injured, they could sue, then the Board of Directors could fire Mr. Angle. Mr. Angle agrees to take Eddie out of the match. Then he tells Luther to get RVD's replacement.

Dudley Boyz vs. RVD/????: Eddie's replacement is Rey Mysterio. Cole asks Tazz for more ECW history lessons. Haven't you ever watched any ECW tapes, Cole?! 6-1-9 is foiled by Bubba. 10-PUNCH COUNTALONG by Mysterio! FRANKENSTEINER! D-Von pulls Mysterio's legs into the turnbuckle. Let's go to commercial break!

Dudley Boyz vs. RVD/Mysterio (cont.): Sleeper Hold by D-Von. SUPERPLEX by Bubba! BUBBA BOMB is foiled. SPRINGBOARD SENTON by Mysterio! SPLIT-LEGGED MOONSAULT by RVD! WHAZZUP is foiled. FIVE-STAR FROGSPLASH misses! 3-D is foiled! 6-1-9! RVD wins via ROLLNG THUNDER! Afterwards, the Dudleys do a beatdown. 3-D to Mysterio! Eddie ATTAX! CHAIRSHOTS FOR EVERYONE! And... we're out.

That's all for this week. Until then, Good Night, take care of yourselves, and Undertaker would look a lot better with Booker T's hairstyle.

FIRST EVER "W of the Day"! (4/12/04)

Please Support The Neo-Geo Pocket Color!

Promote this thread!

Since: 26.1.03
From: Naples, FL

Since last post: 10 days
Last activity: 8 hours
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.58
God-awful Smackdown tonight. Just terrible....I couldn't watch the opening "heart attack" angle, and the announcers calling it a "tragedy" is a slap in the face of real tragedies....Cena's rap was all-right, but him pandering to the crowd is SO un-cool....Booker T. and a fortune teller. What else can I say? Personally, I was hoping Papa Shango showed up....So let me get this straight- they have all this c'weight talent, and they put the title on JACQUELINE?! Someone who hasn't been on TV for HOW MANY months? I don't get it. I'm not necessarily against a woman winning the c'weight belt, but Jacqueline has to be the least-over woman on the roster (except in Texas)....

The 'Taker squash was what it was, and nothing more. Not a fan of him using a submission as a finisher....A hand out of the grave? Come on.....Dawn Marie still wrestles? Well, I guess tonight at least. Just a backdrop to advance the Dupree/Cena feud, which they could've done in the opening match....I thought Bradshaw was on Fox News, not CNBC?....Decent main event, but that's all. What is it now, 3 weeks in a row the Dudz have been in the main event? Yikes....

IM's, college and More!: Experience It
Nuclear Winter
Boudin rouge

Since: 9.11.03
From: Bedford, Michigan

Since last post: 1482 days
Last activity: 33 days
#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.39
A couple notes about the parts I happened to see (I'm sorry, Friends is... was... a funny show)...

Could Dupree keep his little French trooper under control (if you know what I mean, and I think you do)?! Please!

Let me get this straight: the creative team thinks its a GOOD IDEA to have Jacqueline defeat Chavo for the title? I bet they also think it'd be a good idea to have Eddie Guerrero's mother fake a heart attack.

Oh, wait...

Randy Orton: I say a lot of things, Jim Bob. Some of them make sense aaaaaand some of them don’t. It’s really a crapshoot with Randy Orton. I think that makes interviews exciting.

(WWE Crazy Go Nuts Booty Shake)

Since: 26.1.03
From: Naples, FL

Since last post: 10 days
Last activity: 8 hours
#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.58
Oh, and Nick Patrick is THE MAN for taking an un-protected chair shot. He should get to ref world title matches for the rest of the year.

IM's, college and More!: Experience It
Spaceman Spiff

Since: 2.1.02
From: Philly Suburbs

Since last post: 31 days
Last activity: 23 hours
#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.05
    Originally posted by Nuclear Winter
    Let me get this straight: the creative team thinks its a GOOD IDEA to have Jacqueline defeat Chavo for the title?

That was Steph's idea. According to the PWInsider, TE Matt Capotelli (sp?) was going to be the challenger until Bob Holly gave him a concussion at a house show. So *obviously* the next best solution is Jacqueline.

(edited by Spaceman Spiff on 7.5.04 0829)

Lap cheong

Since: 15.1.02
From: Philly

Since last post: 3951 days
Last activity: 3950 days
#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.00
Hehehe, for those of you who watched the show last night, if I had an extra two hours to give, it's yours. Thanks to my job, and tons of real life stuff, I "forgot" to tape Smackdown last night. Ooops....psyche!

After a quarter of a century on this planet, there's three things I know for sure...
1)Ain't nothing like a Dirty Pair marathon on New Year's Eve.
2)I'd make a fine Mrs. HHH II.
3) I'd make an acceptable Mrs. Orton.
1400 reasons to luv me!
Net Hack Slasher

Since: 6.1.02
From: Outer reaches of your mind

Since last post: 4865 days
Last activity: 3285 days
#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.42
-Cena vs. Doug Basham- Cena mentions 5 moves of doom, that's pretty funny... This match went 5-minutes, why can't I remember a single thing that happened.

-Jacqueline vs. Chavo- Did Texas buy Tuscon? Damn you George W. Look I want strong women in wrestling, on ratio I like alot more percentage of women then men in The E. But Jacqueline, JACQUELINE. The question is WHY? What does she add! Sure it's a cheap pop for any woman to attack a heel, but it's so short term I can't believe they are stupid enough to waste a CW belt on it. Jacqueline isn't even a good wrestler, she's not top 5 on the Raw roster, if you take everything into consideration she's not even a top 10 woman wrestler... I guess she's "legit tough woman" which means even less then being legit tough man. She's under 5 feet & has the most absurd chest size I've seen. Seeing her in the ring I'm shocked she can do anything athletic with those tires & hard to take her serious fighting even women. Jazz might be believable in this role if WWE desired to. Jackie not Women title worthy let alone CW title.

-Undertaker vs. Stamboli/Nunzio- Wow I'm "privileged" to see Undertaker squash 2 guys in 2-minutes. IT'S MY PRIVLEGED!. You guys should feel privileged that I'm watching this total crap on a stick of a program. I didn't even mind the match that much, the whole "I'm not worthy to see The Undertaker" crap spewed by Cole pissed me off... I do like bitter Angle making matches and if you don't like it TOUGH HE DOESN'T LIKE HAVING BROKEN LEG.

-Torrie vs. Dawn- Speaking of, here's Torrie wrestling. This match had the most illogical transformation of offense I've ever seen. Dawn has control early, takes the turnbuckle out and hits Torrie face right on the exposed steel turnbuckle. Torrie sells it for a bit, Dawn gets her and ready to smack Torrie into the turnbuckle again but miraculously Torrie blocks, recovers and goes out on a full out offense attack on Dawn. When did taking a steel unexposed turnbuckle become a cue to start your offense comeback?... What made it that even worse is that Cena took the same head hit on the exposed turnbuckle which knocked him out. Very good beatdown by Dupree though.

-RVD/Mysterio vs. Dudley Boyz- Thank gawd a decent match, hell a good segment for once. Rey looked fantastic here. Some real good double-teaming set ups by the faces. Rolling thunder/Springboard legdrop combo for the babyfaces for the win... Bubba takes a chair and prepares to do damage but Eddie runs

-OtherStuff- Houseshow footage of Eddie bringing his family into the ring, Bradshaw attacks. I felt like I was watching AAA(not because of the ethnicity of the crowd) because of the quick edits to the horrified crowd that usually AAA always did back when it was on may Latino station here... If you didn't find it really bad the first time, they show it again. What is with the green shirt guy in front of the stretcher smiling LoL... Booker's wild adventure, I like Booker acting in strange situations but wow this is cheesy... Unmarked grave, glove hand popping out, Umm Wow just wow... Bradshaw at the CNBC studies, I thought he was a Fox guy?... Heyman teaches Kurt backstage the art of "Bait n Switch".

-Line of the Night: Chimmel "Chavo Classic"
-Sign of the Night: "Raw > SD!"
-3Stars of the Night: 1)Mysterio. 2)RVD. 3)Dupree.

The first hundred minutes was as bad as wrestling can get. The only thing that was remotely good was the Dupree major beatdown on Cena. The 15-minute main was good mostly due to Mysterio... Jacqueline as CW champ has made the title into a total gimmick prop.

smark/net attack wienerville advisory stays at BLUE alert - Guarded (With Benoit & Eddie being World & WWE champions you'd expect all's be right but couldn't do it due to Trish/Y2J character switches & whats the deal with JBL PPV main event)- 5/6
It's False

Since: 20.6.02
From: I am the Tag Team Champions!

Since last post: 31 days
Last activity: 31 days
#8 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.83
    Originally posted by Spaceman Spiff
      Originally posted by Nuclear Winter
      Let me get this straight: the creative team thinks its a GOOD IDEA to have Jacqueline defeat Chavo for the title?

    That was Steph's idea. According to the PWInsider, TE Matt Capotelli (sp?) was going to be the challenger until Bob Holly gave him a concussion at a house show. So *obviously* the next best solution is Jacqueline.

    (edited by Spaceman Spiff on 7.5.04 0829)

And yet the writers were BAFFLED on what to do with Ultimo Dragon. And they're STILL baffled on what to do with Paul London and Billy Kidman.

On the other hand, somewhere out there, Disco Inferno's having himself one big laugh over this.

I'll take Shadow Stevens to block!

Since: 12.7.03

Since last post: 4212 days
Last activity: 3659 days
#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.13
my micheal cole bitch-fest continues this week as the "best announcer in the world" proceeded to tell us this week about what a priviledge it was to be seeing the undertaker in action. Reminding us what a legend he is. He then called rene dupree getting dumped on his ass "landing on his rear end"...

I swear i have nightmares with that fake during-a-rico-match laugh, "rico just likes to have a good time"...thank gd rico wasnt on the show last night...

The Dudleys suck. Buh-Buh needs to wear pants, maybe thats what it is..

Booker T's segement were PURE WRESTLECRAP in the purest form. The witch doctor's accent kept coming in and out and then when Booker went to the cemetary, a HAND CAME OUT OF THE DIRT!! woah! Does this mean Crash Holly is coming back?

Eddie's Chair shots at the end were sweet!! Thats about all that was sweet.

Cena is stale.

Bradshaw was funny, but is really really crossing the line politically...

The show just plain sucked.


Since: 10.7.02
From: Staten Island, NYC

Since last post: 4284 days
Last activity: 4263 days
#10 Posted on
When did taking a steel unexposed turnbuckle become a cue to start your offense comeback?... What made it that even worse is that Cena took the same head hit on the exposed turnbuckle which knocked him out.

Well, one would assume that Dupree slams peoples heads into stuff with significantly more force than Dawn Marie. Plus, Torrie obviously had her hands up in front of her face when she got klonked.

... and I'm obviously thinking about this too much.

Since: 19.5.02

Since last post: 4028 days
Last activity: 1788 days
#11 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.64
Renegade Raine says:

    Originally posted by tsmstu
    Does this mean Crash Holly is coming back

No, OBVIOUSLY this is foreshadowing the return of THE ONE, THE ONLY...AL WILSON~!

Anyways, those Booker T segments had me rolling from the absolute cheese factor of all of it.

Rene and Fifi continue to be my favorite tag team on Smackdown...and that's a sad, sad thing. But damn...when Rene was doing his beatdown...let's just say I've been WAY too influenced by DEAN's recaps.

I was really hoping that London would FINALLY get a shot at the Cruiserweight Belt, but I guess freakin' black JACKIE was the logical choice. You know, I think that ANY other RAW woman wrestler (not valet, minus Lita and Gail) would have worked better for this role if they wanted to do the whole woman upset thing, hell FIFI would have worked better. She at LEAST is more over.

Renegade's current state of mind (in the picture): HAPPINESS! goth vampire dude...

Visit's good for you!

Thread rated: 4.51
Pages: 1
Thread ahead: Tommy Dreamer retires
Next thread: DVD Review: Best of Dynamite Kid
Previous thread: Lawler to appear at Kaufman Tribute
(7755 newer) Next thread | Previous thread
Where will the Tough Enough contestants go? My guess is OVW for right now. I don't think they have to worry about a creative direction for those two for a while.
Related threads: SmackDown SPOILERS - WWE shoots TV angle at house show [SPOILER] - Does the Future of SD hinge on the outcome of Taker vs. Booker T? - More...
The W - Pro Wrestling - The Great Thomas SmackDown! Report 5/6/04Register and log in to post!

The W™ message board

©2001-2018 Brothers Zim

This old hunk of junk rendered your page in 0.657 seconds.