Judgement Day has come and gone. Hopefully, SmackDown! will go back to not sucking! It's time for The Great Thomas SmackDown! Report!
Eddie Guerrero: That's the best lowrider I've seen yet! He hugs Some Random Woman. He's carrying a bag into the ring. He opens it up and shows that he stole Bradshaw's blood-stained hat. He proceeds to scratch his ass with it. He tells Bradshaw to invest in bandages, since he wants to pin Bradshaw 1-2-3 for the title TONIGHT! He calls out Bradshaw! Bradshaw comes out and declines the offer. He says he won't gamble against a loose cannon. He demands that Eddie hand over the title that Bradshaw "rightfully won." Before Eddie and Bradshaw can come to blows, Mr. Angle comes out and says that Eddie can't make the matches, so he denies Eddie's request for a rematch. However, he makes a match of Bradshaw and the Dudley Boys vs. Eddie, Rob Van Dam, and Rey Mysterio, TONIGHT!
Cheating Death, Stealing Life: The Eddie Guerrero Story: Why isn't this on DVD? C'mon, this is MONEY!
Rico/Haas vs. F.B.I.: Cole wants Haas to walk on the runway, but Haas decides to jog past it instead. Armbars galore! An especially bizarre one by Rico. Rico spanks Nunzio! PONY RIDE! SPINEBUSTER by Stamboli! Dropkick by Nunzio! Rico kisses Nunzio, and Haas his the GERMAN SUPLEX PIN for the win!
Cole and Tazz: A group of girls jump up and down behind them. They no-sell it, and decide to talk about the Chavo/Jacqueline match from Judgement Day.
Locker Room: Los Chavos talk about their upcoming Triple Threat match. the two joke about which Chavo is better.
Kidman vs. Akio: HOLY CRAP! What is Kidman doing back?! Before the two can start, Mordecai comes out! Akio and Kidman jump him, but Mordecai tosses them around like ragdolls. INVERTED JAWBREAKER! CLOTHESLINE! CRUCIFIX POWERBOMB! Akio and Kidman are dead! Mordecai looks to the heavens, leaves, and takes his staff with him.
Trainer's Room: Bradshaw gets examined before his match. He tells the Doctor not to listen to Eddie Guerrero's lies about his injuries.
Duprée vs. Cena: Rematch from Judgement Day! Duprée's tights says "French Phenom". Bodyslam by Cena. Headlock! The two bounce against the ropes, and have a MID-AIR COLLISION! Cole thinks the two are dead. Let's go to commercial break!
Duprée vs. Cena (cont.): René tosses Cena shoulderfirst into the steel post! DDT by René! Now Duprée works on Cena's shoulder. AAAHHH! SCARY CLOSEUP of Cena's face! He's the new Rubberman! BACK BODY DROP by Cena! And another! And a third! Clotheslines galore! Cena's a HOUSE O' FIRE! Duprée leaves the ring, but Cena tosses him back in! Duprée tries to powerbomb Cena through the announce table, but Cena foils him with a BACK BODY DROP! Duprée then tries to whack Cena with the French flag, but that is foiled as well. But Duprée kicks Cena in the nuts, and rolls back into the ring, where he wins by count-out! Afterwards, Duprée hits the MICHINOKU DRIVER II on Cena, then dances the FRENCH TICKLER over Cena's body!
Judgement Day: Footage of the chairshot that bloodied Eddie Guerrero.
New Chavo vs. Chavo Classic vs. Spike: Los Chavos gang up on Spike. HEADSCISSORS by Spike! FACE STOMP by Chavo Classic! FLIPOVER LEG WHIP! FLYING CROSSBODY by Spike to both Chavos! DOUBLE ARMDRAG! GORYBOMB is countered! Spike hits the DUDLEY DOG! Chavo Classic tries to attack Spike, but Spike knocks him on top of New Chavo, and the ref counts 1.. 2.. 3! OMG NEW CHAMP! Chavo Classic celebrates, but New Chavo is aghast!
RAW Rebound: Lita says "Yes" to Kane, Eugene and The Rock lay the smackdown on The Coach, and Shawn Michaels helps Kane win the #1 Contendership.
Backstage: Funaki interviews Booker T. Booker claims that Undertaker cheated at Judgement Day. Booker asked Mr. Angle for a rematch, but Undertaker isn't here tonight. But Booker DOES get a match against any opponent of his choosing. And Booker chooses Funaki! Funaki: "Tell me you didn't just say that!" Funaki whacks Booker with the mike and runs away! Ha ha ha!
Funaki vs. Booker T: Booker squashes Funaki. DROPKICK by Funaki! BULLDOG! But Booket T comes back! SIDEWALK SLAM by Booker! "UNDERTAKER" chant. CAMEL CLUTCH by Booker! Knee to the face! Funaki's nose has been busted open! Chinlock by Booker! SCISSORS KICK! 1.. 2.. 3, and that's all she wrote.
Earlier Tonight: René Duprée beat down John Cena, so next week, it'll be Cena vs. Duprée for the title in a Lumberjack Match!
Trainer's Room: A bunch of officials try to hold back Bradshaw who just beat the crap out of Eddie Guerrero. ONOES!
Kenzo Suzuki: He screams some more Japanese.
Bradshaw/Dudley Boys vs. RVD/Mysterio/Guerrero: Mr. Angle emerges from the Bowels of the Earth, to say that Eddie can wrestle in the match once he wakes up. He then returns to the Earth. SPIN KICK by Mysterio! FLYING CROSSBODY by RVD! Suplex by D-Von. Neckbreaker by Bubba. "BRADSHAW SUCKS" chant. D-Von chokes RVD with his wrist tape. HEADSCISSORS by Mysterio! SPRINGBOARD HILO by RVD to both Dudleys! Bradshaw's POWERBOMB is countered into a HEADSCISSORS! Mysterio hits the 6-1-9! RVD hits the FIVE-STAR FROSPLASH! But Bubba breaks the pin! Let's go to commercial break!
Bradshaw/Dudley Boys vs. RVD/Mysterio/Guerrero (cont.): During the break, the Dudleys hit a 3-D on RVD on the outside! SPRINGBOARD MOONSAULT TO REVERSE DDT by Mysterio! DELAYED VERTICAL SUPLEX by D-Von! SPINEBUSTER by Bradshaw! Bradshaw puts Mysterio into an ABDOMINAL STRETCH, BUT WAIT! EDDIE GUERRERO APPEARS! Bradshaw is shocked! CLOTHESLINE FROM HELL is foiled by Mysterio! Mysterio hits a TOP-ROPE BULLDOG on Bubba! HOT TAG to Eddie! Eddie is a HOUSE O' FIRE! THREE AMIGOS to D-Von! But Eddie feels lightheaded and faints. Bradshaw looks concerned. He comes int the ring to check on him. No, wait! He pins Eddie! 1.. 2.. 3! Bradshaw leaves. The EMTS check on Eddie. And... we're out.
That's all for this week. Until then, Good Night, take care of yourselves, and this show was pretty enjoyable. Guess my prediction was right!
First Smackdown in a while I can say I honestly liked. Mordecai pretty much struck me as the opposite of the way he's been hyped.....his entrance was pedestrian, but he looked fairly impressive once he got in the ring. Was shorter, but thicker looking than I thought he'd be
Funaki gets to bonk someone with a microphone before his usual painful death. I can't complain.
And.....ye gods, I was really, really trying to ignore the legend of Dupree previously, but damn, man, that thing just reaches out and slaps you in the face
Mrs. Shem (who is Jewish) was highly offended by Mordecai, since the Old Testament Mordecai was (a) not Christian and (b) not a Gandalf-lookin' freak who went around squashing cruiserweights. Maybe they should have named him Paul of Tarsus or something. This was my first sight of the guy since I skipped JD, but it's hard to judge how good he really is from a rather pedestrian CW squash.
Come to think of it, tonight was the night of beating up on people smaller than you. Booker and Funaki, JBL and Mysterio -- hell, even the Chavos got to pick on Spike Dudley. Nice to see some things never change under Vince.
S'io credesse che mia risposta fosse a persona che mai tornasse al mondo, questa fiamma staria senzu piu scosse. Ma per cio che giammai di questo fondo non torno vivo alcun, s'i'odo il vero, senza tema d'infamia ti rispondo.
This was a MUCH better SmackDown than seen in recent weeks, with a surprisingly enjoyable main event. I completely dug how into Guerrero the crowd was when he made his ME appearance, and I was rolling on the floor when Booker said Paul Bearer must have switched his "powder" and that's why he lost to Taker.
Good show, SD...keep it up.
"Mordecai is a man who walks our streets!" -Michael Cole, SmackDown, 5.20.04
Originally posted by geemoneyThat white haired agent from RAW a couple weeks ago that I couldn't place was there backstage with Fit Finlay, and thanks to the Torch, it's newest agent Steve Keirn. The more you know...
Good Lord, they've brought back SKINNER. As an agent, sure, but what was he up to before?
And the only segment I wanted to see was Mordecai. I do wish he'd do "reverent" just a LITTLE faster, but no complaints otherwise.
DEAN's Nuggets of Wisdom:
"A-Train could wear a Vampirella outfit and I would toast a load to it."
I have to say SmackDown has finally developed since the draft. The show was off the hook I liked everything even Chavo Classic winning the title! Other then the crappy entrance Mordacai was awesome. Cena & Dupree had a good match. Last but not least the unexpected happened the JBL storyline became interesting!!!!!!!!!!!!The Main Event was great and the silence when eddie fainted was incredibly dramatic.Bradshaw did surprisingly well he suck to what he knows best straight up brawling and I think his new charactor is finally getting over.
I think The Bash is looking to be a good buy if things keep going this good
Losers are not those who lose! Losers are those who fail to learn from loss!-Told to me by Olympic wrestling Champ Brandon Slay
Chavo Classic = Eddy Chavo Jr = Chyna CW belt = IC belt Me = just glad they're on my TV
I'm a little worried about Mordecai's finisher, the Crucifix Bomb/Razor's Edge. If he's gonna feud with Taker, can he get the big guy in that move?
Who was the biggest guy Ramon got in the Edge? Luger? Whenever I see a new guy and his finishing move, I start listing the opponents he couldn't hit with it. If he can't use it, the finisher's wasted on main event matches with the big guys and we're looking at a certain roll-up/foot-on-the-ropes finish. Orton's RKO can be hit on anybody with minimal risk and total credibility (depending on how cleanly it's applied, of course). I bought into Brock's F5 once he hit Rikishi (!) with it, and that lead up to the question of whether he could hit it on Big Show. Same with Cena's FU.
But this Mordecai move takes some arm strength. While we've seen him nail cruiserweights with it, I'm still not sold on it and thus him as a TV-ready performer (entrance, style, moveset, finisher) until I see the Crucifix Bomb on someone weighing more than 250.
And can we please PLEASE drop the Danny Doring/Shane Douglas/Jeff Hardy jawjackers? It looks as damaging to your knees as it does to the other guy's jaw. At least Jeff's sitout version moved the impact to his backside.
"To be the man, you gotta beat demands." -- The Lovely Mrs. Tracker
I did like the little "SHINK" sound effect they added when Mordecai placed his staff into its placeholder ... kind of reminded me of Link from Ocarina of Time.
And what exactly is "Mordecai is the man who walks our streets!" supposed to even MEAN?
Alessandro "Hercules" Boondy
Just so you guys know: 75% of this crap [you read on the internet] is made up, either by the writer, or the wrestler the writer is getting the dirt from. Just so you know. -- Statement by "Tammy Sytch", from Hyatte's Dec. 29th column ... Lest we forget.
They need to change Angle's theme song to Mr.Roboto. Judgement Day passes and yet the three main feuds are still the same. Taker Vs. Booker T, Cena Vs. Dupreé, Bradshaw Vs. Guerrero...boring. I gotta say I do like Mordecai since this is the gimmick shit that I wanted.
Originally posted by AlessandroI did like the little "SHINK" sound effect they added when Mordecai placed his staff into its placeholder ... kind of reminded me of Link from Ocarina of Time.
Get the dude a green hat and some brown boots and your set.
-Eddie/Layfield/Angle interview- Maybe I'm not in the demographic but I don't see much appeal of Eddie feeling his butt with stuff. Eddie promos really seem to lose steam this last month... Layfield talks about he's not a gambling man & gamblers are losers (much like that WCW wrestler who threw away a pack of cards before his job duty). Professor Xangle slowly raises up from The Mysterio launch pad (that's odd). He makes a 6-man tag match with the freakin Dudleyz in the MAIN EVENT AGAIN! How many weeks is this?
-Haas/Rico vs. Nunzio/Stamboli- That "pen-is" armbar was disturbing. Looked like they were trying to do the lochness monster using shadow hands... Not much of a match to speak of.
-Kidman vs. Akio- What? Okay something's up, yep and there it is Mordecai... My opinion? HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA. He looks like a chubby young teen going out for Halloween. I do appreciate they are introducing guys in a more unique manner but this guy is suppose to be scary and it looks like he still has his babyfat with him.
-Dupree vs. Cena- That damn Dean, all I'm noticing it's the Dupree package. It's like he's got a foreign object in there (har get it). Cena goes for the behind the back cradle(aaaah).They hit a double crossbody in really there first impact move of the night & it makes them knock out (oookay) We go to commercial(thank gawd)... Armbar by Dupree thank goodness it's not as suggestive as Rico's. But seriously Dupree doesn't need any more help. Let's go to the ending, Dupree hits a low blow & gets back into the ring as Cena gets counted out and keeps the title. Umm why didn't Dupree bring him in and get the pinfall title win?
-Chavo Classic vs. Spike vs. Chavo Jr.- Nice reverse of Jr. the Gory bomb from Spike... The cruiser title has officially turned into "Wouldn't it be funny if.." title. Soon Fifi wins the title OMG wouldn't that be funny! But would she time limit in defending be the normal 1 month or as she's a dog and in dog years you multiply by 4 making it at least every 4 months she has to defend it.
-Booker vs. Funaki- Ha the interview backstage was funny. Highlight of the show. Funaki punks out Booker. Booker accuses Paul Bearer of switching his magic pouch (I HAVE A QUESTIONG FOR YOU GUYS. I didn't see Judgement Day, did they ever explain the hand coming out of the grave?)... Funaki gets his nose bloodied and gets beat.
-Bradshaw/Dudleyz vs. Eddie/RVD/Rey- Eddie is seen knocked out backstage with Bradshaw with a chair in the area(these days you are shocked when a TV match goes as scheduled). RVD gets hit with a 3D outside the ring and vanishes, the only logical explanation is HHH & HBK were on camera together at ringside for a mili-second as RVD the floor selling, and the VORTEX OF DOOM got RVD... Hey here's Eddie, springboard to a inverted DDT by Rey (beauty). Nice dropkick by Rey to a charging Clothesline by Bradshaw. Eddie gets tag in and cleans house but gets woozy and passes out everyone stops except Bradshaw who tags himself in and get the pin. Eddie looks frightening in selling this.
-OtherStuff- JBL gets his blood pressure taking... Ooookay is all I could say when seeing the 4 absurd flaunting errr ladies behind Tazz & Cole... Chavo Classic acting backstage was Classic... You get to see and hear the chair shot Eddie took.
-Line of the Night: Funaki "Tell me you didn’t.. just say that” -Sign of the Night: "5 Moves of Doom" -3Stars of the Night: 1)Mysterio. 2)Funaki. 3)Bradshaw.
No Undertaker this week, I guess we weren't privileged enough this week. If we act really, really good we might to get to see him next week. Next week we will see Dupree/Cena lumberjack match, I'll guess Dupree wins the title next week. Mordecai looks babyish. I like Chavo Sr. but cruiser weight champ, come on! With Jacqueline & now Chavo Sr. the title is a "wouldn't it be funny if.." champion... I'll go with some positives. Rey end of match offensive flurry was sweet and I enjoyed the Booker/Funaki stuff backstage. But man this show is like watching a 2-hour Heat sometimes.
smark/net attack wienerville advisory stays at BLUE alert - Guarded (With Benoit & Eddie being World & WWE champions you'd expect all's be right but couldn't do it due to Trish/Y2J character switches & whats the deal with JBL PPV main event)- 5/6
If this were a real vote, I would abstain. Lesnar has been really boring lately. I guess I'll vote for Rico, Orton has been bland and unentertaining (and he's feuding with my favorite guy, so if he's not entertaining me there's a problem).