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The W - Pro Wrestling - The Great Thomas SmackDown! Report 10/30/03
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The Great Thomas
Sujuk








Since: 17.6.02
From: Miami, Florida

Since last post: 3378 days
Last activity: 3378 days
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.27
I decided to skip last week's SmackDown!, since I heard the Undertaker got over on both the US and WWE Champions on the same night. I don't need that kind of anger. It ain't healthy. It was either watch that, or play Soul Calibur II. I hope you understand. Anyway, it's time for The Great Thomas SmackDown! Report!

Angle/Benoit vs. A-Train/Cena: There's a jack-o-lantern at the entrance. What is this, Halloween Havoc?! THUGONOMICS! A-Train is a Wookie. Ha ha. Kurt lands a HUGE GERMAN SUPLEX on A-Train! Cole makes an Ivan Putski shoutout. Benoit misses the SWANDIVE HEADBUTT! Benoit wins via another SWANDIVE HEADBUTT! Afterwards, Cena and A-Train argue. A-Train shoves Cena, so Cena kicks A-Train in the gonads and gives him the F-U!

McMahon and Heyman: McMahon is visibly pissed about his upcoming Buried Alive match. He wants terrorists to burn down Taker's house. He wants Taker's children kidnapped, and his wife raped by a motorcycle gang. And he wants it done in 15 minutes! OMG VINCE HAS GONE MAD!

Torrie Wilson: Why is it every holiday match has to have some kind of stupid Diva gimmick match or contest? Why?

Benoit et Angle: Angle asks Benoit to be the first member of his team at Survivor Series... and Benoit accepts!

McMahon et Heyman: Paul has nothing for Vince. Vince threatens to fire Paul. Paul says he's glad, since he didn't want to work for the current Vince McMahon, but the Vince McMahon who had the RUTHLESS AGRESSION to take on Stone Cold and even the federal government. McMahon leave. Is that a crowd pop I hear for Paul E.? I believe it is!

Mysterio vs. Ultimo Dragon: Tajiri does Guest Commentary. MUCHA LUCHA! Ultimo Dragon wins via interference by Tajiri.

Lesnar et Big Show: They argue about last week's match. Random Backstage Guy appears, and tells Brock that Heyman wants to see him in the ring.

Confidential: Honoring The Life of Stu Hart.

Paul Heyman: He comes out with Nathan Jones and Matt Morgan, and calls out Brock Lesnar. Heyman wants to talk business. Brock calls out Big Show to back him up. Man, Brock looks TINY next to Jones and Morgan! Heyman announces Jones, Morgan, and Big Show as the members of Team Lesnar. Lesnar likes what he hears. And for tonight's main event, it will be Lesnar and Big Show against the A.P.A!

Jordan et Spanky: They're playing the new SmackDown! game... in weird wigs. Dawn Marie appears, and shows them her outfit. They like it. She leaves, and the two continue playing.

Bob Holly: He's coming back to hurt Brock! OMG!

Trick or Treat Costume Contest: Funaki hosts the contests... i an afro. Torrie is a bunny rabbit, and Dawn Marie is Wonder Woman. Torrie wins. Torrie always wins. Now, Part 2: Bobbing for apples! Dawn Marie goes first. She gets in the chocolate, and takes her top off! Tazz appears, and since Dawn Marie gave us a treat, Tazz will give Funaki a trick. Torrie teases throwing Funaki into the tub of chocolate, but throws Tazz in, instead. Ha ha ha!

The Cat: He's coming! Somebody call his momma!

Cena: He's bummed. Brock appears, and tells Cena that he could be the fifth member of Team Lesnar!

Tazz and Cole: Tazz is still covered in chocolate. He gives Cole a big hug! Ha ha!

Los Guerreros: Chavo tells Eddie that he's a disappointment. He owes everyone a public apology.

Guerrero The Elder: He's out to give his apology. He says he's sorry for letting everyone down. He says it's hard to battle drugs and alcohol. He wonders why Chavo would bring up a subject like that. Eddie's not giving up! He won't rest until he's a champion again! Big "EDDIE!" chant. Shaniqua appears with the Tag belts. The Bashams attack! But Eddie fights back! Backdrops galore! But the Bashams make a comeback and toss Eddie against the steel steps! Chavo appears to help Eddie to the back.

Blade: Starring Wesley Snipes!

In The Back: Eddie wants the Bashams next week. Heyman obliges. Next week, it will be Eddie vs. The Bashams... in a handicap match!

Kurt Angle: He announces that Bob Holly and the A.P.A. will be the next three members of Team Angle V.2!

The Main Event: Lesnar/Big Show vs. A.P.A. Lesnar and Big Show step into the ring. Let's go to commercial break!

The Main Event (cont): Bradshaw squashes Lesnar, Big Show squashes Bradshaw... what is up with Cole and this whole "1,500 pounds of beef"? That's just weird. CLOTHESLINE FROM HELL to Big Show! A.P.A wins via DQ after a chairshot. Big Show Pillmanizes Faarooq's leg! Team Ange makes the save, but Jones and Morgan fight them off. Team Lesnar celebrates in the ring... and, we're out!

That's all for this week. Until then, Good Night, take care of yourselves, and enjoy Halloween tomorrow! I'm thinking of going trick-or-treating dressed as a semi-lazy wrestling recapper.



KILL BILLy Hatcher and the Giant Egg.

Promote this thread!
ScreamingHeadGuy
Frankfurter








Since: 1.2.02
From: Appleton, WI

Since last post: 751 days
Last activity: 751 days
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.96
One year ago, Steph and Bisch kissed. That was promptly treated as never happening.

FOOTAGE! of Vince appointing Paul, Paul booking the ME, the ME itself, and the post-match stuff. 3 minutes.

It's my life, my time, my rights, my rhyme. It's time for Sssssmackdown!, from Atlanta, GA...and a Fashion Report, too!

Angle, in red singlet with blue stars (with white stars therein), blue kneepads and gold medals, and Benoit, in red "Wolverine" tights with wolverine head, vs. Cena, in babyblue jersey (#20), black visor, jeanshorts, and lock 'n chain, and ATrain, in black crested undies. Ha - a wookie. Nick Patrick, in the blue shirt, is the referee. Flying headbutt to a pin on ATrain. A nice match. Post-match Cena, intensely, lays-out ATrain.

In the back, Vince, in black suit and blue shirt, goes feral in the presence of Paul, in black suit, off-white shirt and tie, and Yankees cap. Vince has an evil plan, but Paul unknowingly monkeywrenches it. Vince over(re)acts, threatening Paul.

In the lockerroom, Torrie wears a towell. In the back, Angle asks Benoit to join his Survivor Series team; Benoit accepts the offer, but not friendship. Meanwhile, Paul enters Vince's Room of Fun, defiant (no terrorists, burning children, or bikergang rapists). In fact, Paul goads Vince, reminding Vince of how far he has declined from his past greatness. And we watch as, in Vince's eyes, a glimmer alights.

Tazz, inblack suit and orange shirt (no tie this week) and Cole the Ping-Pong Player, in navyblue suit and pink shirt, commentate and show us FOOTAGE! from the past weekend's houseshows. Tajiri, in black "Wrestlemania XX" tshirt, with Cruiserweight Title and his yakuzas, joins commentary.

Rey, in green/purple mask and trunks (Incredible Hulk-like) vs. Ultimo, in platinum tights, mask, cape and pauldrons, with white spines. Hebner officiates. Tajiri interference leads to Dragon getting the pin. An average match. Post-match Dragon just walks away.

In their lockerroom, BigShow and Brock argue about last week's loss. ProductionGuy puts an end to that when he calls Brock to the ring.

WTF? Paul, with Nathan Jones, in red fullcuts, and Someone, in silver fullcuts with black vertical stripes, comes to the ring. Paul introduces them both (the Someone is Matt Morgan, and he has a cromagnum-style face). Now Paul calls-out Brock who comes out in black sleeveless "F5 Ring Rage" tshirt and black warmups, the WWE Title over his shoulder. Brock, in turn, brings-out BigShow, in grey sportscoat, black tshirt, and khakis. Apparently, "Team Lesnar" members include BigShow, Matt, and Paul. And Paul books Brock/BigShow vs. APA. Team Lesnar has size, strength, "deliberateness", and (I'm guessing) enough anti-workrate to share.

In the lockerroom, Orlando Jordan and Paul London (?) play the new Smackdown! videogame, and get a sneak-peak at Dawn Marie-Wilson's outfit. Then they play more games.

Hardcore Holly will be back.

Funaki, in afro wig, polyester shirt and gold chain, intros Torrie, in bunny ears, fur-trimmed camisole, and stockings, with carrots, and Dawn Marie-Wilson, as WonderWoman (hey, her bracers can deflect bullets!). Hey, MXC is on!

In the back, Brock says Cena may be the fifth man on his team.

Tazz, chocolate-covered, hugs Mr. Ping-Pong.

In the back, Chavo chides Eddie. Eddie is speachlessly embarrassed/ashamed. FOOTAGE! of losing the Tag Team Titles. I like how Chavo's "turn" is being gradually played-out.

Eddie, in black shortsleeves and khakies, dejected, is in the ring, to publicly appologize. He procedes to cut the PERFECT wounded/betrayed promo; it really builds fan sympathy and gives us people a reason to FEEL for Eddie, to create an emotional bond. Then out comes Shaniqua, brandishing the Tag Team Titles. The Bashams come out, and Eddit bravely fights them off, but eventually the numbers take their toll. Chavo comes out to take Eddie to the back.

In the back, Eddie is tended. Paul arrives to book a match - Eddie vs. Bashams, for next week. Meanwhile, Josh interviews Kurt - Hardcore Holly is on his team, as is the APA.

Taker explains why he's got a Buried Alive match with Vince, via FOOTAGE!-assisted pre-recorded comments.

Brock, in black butt-skull undies, wearing the WWE Title, and BigShow, in black one-strap singlet, the US Title slung over his shoulder, vs. Adbreak, vs. the APA, both in black "APA" tights with cards. Hebner officiates. Brock with the chairshot for a DQ. Angle and Benoit run down for the save, then Matt and Nathan come down for more destrution. The heels all pose.

Overall: Wow - only one match in the second hour. The Torrie/DMW bit was skippable (so I DID skip it) and killed the show's momentum. As it stood, the Eddie promo saved the second hour. The show was slightly below-average.



Fashion Reporter Extraordinare

...as is proper.

Tenken347
Boudin blanc








Since: 27.2.03
From: Parts Unknown

Since last post: 21 hours
Last activity: 3 hours
#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.46
Man, Eddie was all kinds of on fire. That's some of the best promo work I've seen from anyone in at least a little while.
OMEGA
Lap cheong








Since: 18.6.02
From: North Cacalacky

Since last post: 1943 days
Last activity: 1911 days
#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.02
You KNOW your a jobber when you get the show script and read that your role for the night is to play video games backstage and put over a Wonder Woman outfit.



The answer to WWE's financial problems...
Parts Unknown
Lap cheong








Since: 2.1.02
From: Darkenwood

Since last post: 53 days
Last activity: 1 day
#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.93
Jobber or no, at least London and Orlando (city names tag team, perhaps?) are on TV. That's something, at least.

This was a pretty good show, though I think Lesnar should be fined for gratuitous use of the name Paul. "Well, Paul. I know you, Paul. And Paul, we go way back. I hate your guts, Paul. Paul Paul PAUL Paul PAUL..."

It's like he suddenly adopted Obi-Wan-ese as his official language.



"Also, don't incur the wrath of P.U. It can only lead to trouble." - Torchslasher
geemoney
Scrapple








Since: 26.1.03
From: Naples, FL

Since last post: 4 days
Last activity: 2 hours
AIM:  
#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.90
Random Smackdown Thoughts:

Vince threatening Heyman was bordering on disgusting to watch. Really....Love Tajiri on commentary. Sorry, but Jimmy Yang just doesn't intimidate me. Maybe it's that look he always has on his face....Ultimo Dragon wins!!....I can't believe they're putting Jones and Morgan in such a big match....The women's thing was okay. I wish Dawn Marie would've stuck around though....Eddie had his promo boots on today. Awesome job....Sorry, but I won't buy Hardcore Holly as a face....Why do I have a feeling Cena will end up on the face side?
Firecracker
Salami








Since: 26.6.02
From: Miami, FL

Since last post: 3583 days
Last activity: 3419 days
AIM:  
#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.23
I really enjoyed the show. The few matches that we saw were all pretty good, and Eddie and Heyman had killer promos (Paul's rant on Vince really did have some truth in it too). But I have just one question: what the hell was Rey Rey wearing?? Did the guys on Queer Eye For the Straight Guy all get drunk and give Mysterio some whack pants?



Yo, it's me, it's me, it's (points to self) P-A-B!

Marlins are WORLD SERIES CHAMPS!! WOOOO!!!
Mr Heel II
Lap cheong








Since: 25.2.02

Since last post: 9 days
Last activity: 1 day
#8 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.09
Our town is so stupid. They have Trick-or-Treat night on October 30. Best costume went to three "just pushing teenager" girls who collectively dressed as "Ugly", and had a cheer to go with it. They ruled.

The casual fans in the room where I watched Smackdown thought Eddie's promo was never going to end and was boring as hell. But I liked it. I didn't think it was as good as the spoilers made it out to be, but well done nonetheless.

My favorite promo was Heyman's on Vince. About TIME somebody said that. Heyman has such a great evil carnival barker style about him that was well displayed in introducing Morgan and Jones in the ring.

The opening match made it all worthwhile, and Ultimo/Mysterio wasn't too bad either.

Wow. Brock looks like a midget standing in a circle of Show, Jones, and Morgan, doesn't he.

SWEET promo for the Cat. That's the best thing I've ever seem him involved in.

Not bad. A fun time watching, anyway.



emma
Cherries > Peaches








Since: 1.8.02
From: Phoenix-ish

Since last post: 38 days
Last activity: 3 days
#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.47
Boy, I've just become the curmudgeonly old bitch, apparently. Here's a thought: How about putting some wrestling onto the wrestling show? This may have won the award for "Least Amount of Wrestling on Any Wrestling Show Ever". Three matches in a 2-hour show. And it's not like any one of them was long. From something like 38 minutes into the show til the last 6 minutes, we got talking. Lots of talking. If I wanted "My Dinner with Andre", I would have rented it.

Yeah, Eddie's promo was very good. Vince back on track going increasingly psychotic was fine. Heyman fluffing everybody in sight (just for his own devious purposes) is always fun. But I don't watch the damn show for an hour and a half of talking heads interrupted only by lots & lots of commercials.

Where't the wrestling???
Bullitt
Shot in the dark








Since: 11.1.02
From: Houston

Since last post: 3 days
Last activity: 3 days
#10 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.07
Man, SmackDown was about 10 different kinds of horrible tonight.

WAY too many skits/interviews/backstage crap...




Buck 65...Talkin' Honky Blues out now
Spiraling_Shape
Bratwurst








Since: 2.1.02
From: PA

Since last post: 1 day
Last activity: 49 min.
#11 Posted on | Instant Rating: 0.00
Apparently according to the spoilers, we were supposed to have a handicap FBI vs. Hass & Benjamin match, which would begin the World`s Greatest Face Turn. Also a Bashams/Scotty & Keesh match was axed too. Apparently so we could hear about Vince`s fantasy about Sara Taker being "raped by a biker gang" and get the full return of The Colossus of Boggo Road.



"I'm the best poetic genius since Leapin' Lanny Poffo."
Big G
Potato korv








Since: 21.8.03
From: the people who brought you Steel Magnolias....

Since last post: 34 days
Last activity: 1 hour
#12 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.04
    Originally posted by Spiraling_Shape
    ... The Colossus of Boggo Road.


Nice reference. That should be his actual title rather than, real name, generic wrestling hoss #356.

Can I steal it?



Warrior Quote: "Presuming initial consensualness, where exactly do we draw the lines of our judgment pinning down the responsibility and accountability inextricably attached to each human life? "

Umm Indeed!
Tribal Prophet
Andouille








Since: 9.1.02
From: Winnipeg, MB, Canada

Since last post: 68 days
Last activity: 8 hours
#13 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.11
    Originally posted by Big G
      Originally posted by Spiraling_Shape
      ... The Colossus of Boggo Road.


    Nice reference. That should be his actual title rather than, real name, generic wrestling hoss #356.

    Can I steal it?


I thought that WAS his title, like "Heartbreak Kid" is for Shawn Michaels, only they haven't brought it up yet.

Or am I just dense and missing a joke?


Tribal Prophet



Wrestling exists in the eternal present. What is, has always been, and when it no longer is, it never was. It has no past and no future, and sometimes even today is in question. - Madame Manga

Click Here (welovetheiraqiinformationminister.com)
Lotty
Chourico








Since: 23.3.02
From: Bay Area

Since last post: 3368 days
Last activity: 2641 days
#14 Posted on | Instant Rating: 0.00
Gotta love the irony.

Lesnar says he hates Heyman's guts and he didn't forget what he did to him. Low and behold Lesnar brings out the Big Show to back him up.

Hey Brock, that was the guy Heyman aligned himself with. (doh!)

Angle tells Joshie that he has recruited Bob Holly to be on his SS team. He says Holly is seeking revenge on Lesnar for taking him out for a year. Hmmm...let's see...Kurt didn't you break Holly's arm and take him out for a long ass time as well?

I really hate how these storylines are attempted to be dug up again, yet they don't add up. Hey does Test still have immunity from being fired?





Scott Summets
Sujuk








Since: 27.6.02

Since last post: 3908 days
Last activity: 3876 days
#15 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.57
    Originally posted by emma
    Boy, I've just become the curmudgeonly old bitch, apparently. Here's a thought: How about putting some wrestling onto the wrestling show? This may have won the award for "Least Amount of Wrestling on Any Wrestling Show Ever". Three matches in a 2-hour show. And it's not like any one of them was long. From something like 38 minutes into the show til the last 6 minutes, we got talking. Lots of talking. If I wanted "My Dinner with Andre", I would have rented it.

    Yeah, Eddie's promo was very good. Vince back on track going increasingly psychotic was fine. Heyman fluffing everybody in sight (just for his own devious purposes) is always fun. But I don't watch the damn show for an hour and a half of talking heads interrupted only by lots & lots of commercials.

    Where't the wrestling???


The thing is that they actually CUT two matches! FBI vs WGTT and Bashams vs Scotty and Rikishi were cut from the show. And the FBI vs WGTT match was pretty good too. That sucks when the WWE would cut two freaking matches to have more Torrie/Dawn and backstage nonsense!



"I wear it for the thousands who have died, believen' that the Lord was on their side. I wear it for another hundred thousand who have died, believen' that we all were on their side." RIP Johnny Cash



Ringmistress
Lap cheong








Since: 15.1.02
From: Philly

Since last post: 2677 days
Last activity: 2676 days
#16 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.00
I only went as far as the Vince-Paul thing, for obvious reasons. I know Vince is a great heel, and so is Paul, but let's face it, how long will it be until said motorcycle gang gangs up on SaraTaker? Not long enough. I did see the rest on tape, though. Zzzzzzz..... I knew that it would suck without the halloween party. I believe there were THREE really short nothing happening segments on the show last night, making me even more annoyed with Smackdown than I have been recently.

I am a majorly finicky wrestling fan these days. It's not easy blowing off something you grew up with like this, but sometimes it's the only sane choice, dammit!





(edited by Ringmistress on 31.10.03 0638)


After a quarter of a century on this planet, there's three things I know for sure...
1)I'm smarter than I was a year ago.
2)WWE isn't.
3) I'd make a fine Mrs. HHH II.
1300 bitches and counting....
Spiraling_Shape
Bratwurst








Since: 2.1.02
From: PA

Since last post: 1 day
Last activity: 49 min.
#17 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.92
I thought that WAS his title, like "Heartbreak Kid" is for Shawn Michaels, only they haven't brought it up yet.

Yeah it was his nickname and actually Paul E. said it last night when introducing him. I always liked how that sounds, unfortunately I can`t stand Nathan Jones himself.



"I'm the best poetic genius since Leapin' Lanny Poffo."
Simba
Frankfurter








Since: 7.8.02
From: Boston, MA

Since last post: 2507 days
Last activity: 2115 days
#18 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.20
With the number of Japanese SD! wrestlers increasing, do you think that the Patrick for Chioda ref swap had something to do with Patrick being able to speak the language? Or maybe he has more experience working with the Japan guys? I have no idea if he can actually speak Japanese, but I'm wondering if that could be the real reason behind the "trade" a few weeks ago.

(edited by Simba on 31.10.03 1131)


Reserved for future use.
geemoney
Scrapple








Since: 26.1.03
From: Naples, FL

Since last post: 4 days
Last activity: 2 hours
AIM:  
#19 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.90
    Originally posted by Simba
    With the number of Japanese SD! wrestlers increasing, do you think that the Patrick for Chioda ref swap had something to do with Patrick being able to speak the language? Or maybe he has more experience working with the Japan guys? I have no idea if he can actually speak Japanese, but I'm wondering if that could be the real reason behind the "trade" a few weeks ago.

    (edited by Simba on 31.10.03 1131)

I read that the "REAL" reason for the trade was (a) They wanted to have a "Senior" official for each brand (Hebner on RAW, Patrick on Smackdown!) and (b) Chioda was not getting along with Brian Hebner, another Smackdown ref. At least, sez the Torch.
Mayhem
Scrapple








Since: 25.4.03
From: Nashville, TN

Since last post: 2 days
Last activity: 2 days
#20 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.12

And was it me, or did it look like Nathan Jones half-ass screwed up that move he put on Benoit in the end ...

Speaking of forgetting past storylines, the whole Dawn Marie & Torrie parading around in Halloween outfits (not that I mind) when just a few months back they were in a heated feud that culminated in the "death" of Torrie's father.



Ralph Wiggum: "We're going to Africa; land of lions and giraffes and Santa and balloons ... "
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NO, despite popular belief, the Rock WAS NOT born in Pennsylvania. He was born in Hayward, CA. To prove this, we will go back to the topic. Every time the Rock comes back to the Bay Area, he mentions that he is from here.
- AlaaAbdelnaby, Hometown Traditions (2003)
Related threads: Live Smackdown and Velocity Spoilers! - your WWE SMACKDOWN WORKRATE REPORT- 10/23/2003! - Smackdown! 10-23-03 - More...
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