Originally posted by shawnpatrickwwe.com announces suspension of CM Punk.
WWE Chairman Vince McMahon suspends CM Punk June 27, 2011 Tags: Raw: June 27, 2011, CM Punk Monday Night Raw’s abrupt conclusion last night was not due to technical difficulties. The decision to suddenly end the broadcast in that manner was made by WWE Chairman and CEO Vince McMahon, who gave this quote to WWE.com:
“CM Punk was suspended indefinitely for his unprofessional conduct as soon as Raw went off the air.”
With his WWE contract expiring on July 17, one can only assume that this suspension effectively terminates CM Punk’s tenure with WWE.
Those fuckers. Between this Raw, that ending, and all this after-Raw stuff, they finally sucked me back into wrestling.
EDIT: This is the same feeling I had back when the Matt Hardy/Edge/Lita stuff went down back in 2005/6? It was all worked shoot stuff, like this, and I ate it all up then as I am now.
(edited by Zeruel on 28.6.11 0031)
-- 2006 Time magazine Person of the Year -- -- July 2009 Ordained Reverend --
That was all kinds of awesome. I'm like Graves9 in that I was finally ready to give up on most all wrestling, but the last month has turned it around. And now tonight with Raw being such a great show and Punk just killing it, I am hyped for next week (or at least hyped to read about it and FFWD to the good stuff for next week's show).
"Put on your helmets, we'll be reaching speeds of 3!" "It was nice of you to give that dead woman another chance." "All right, look alive everybody...oh sorry Susan."- MST3K: Space Mutiny Click Here (myspace.com)
Because you never know when YouTube is gonna have to remove the promo, here it is transcribed for posterity.
He sits down cross-legged on the entrance ramp.
"John Cena, while you-- you lay there, hopefully as uncomfortable as you possibly can be, I want you to listen to me. I want you to digest this, because before I leave in three weeks with your WWE Championship, I have... a lot of things I wanna get off my chest.
"I don't hate you, John. I don't even dislike you. I do like you; I like you a hell of a lot more than I like most people in the back. I hate... this idea... that you're the best. Because you're not. I'm the best. I'm the best in the world! There's one thing you're better at than I am, and that's kissing Vince McMahon's ass. You're as good at kissing Vince McMahon's ass as Hulk Hogan was! I don't know if you're as good as Dwayne, though; he's a pretty good ass-kisser. Always was and still is.
"Oops, I'm breaking the fourth wall!" *waves at camera with a goofy grin on his face* "I am the best wrestler in the world. I've been the best ever since day one, when I walked into this company, and I've been vilified and hated since that day, because Paul Heyman saw something in me that no one else wanted to admit. That's right, I'm a Paul Heyman guy. You know who else was a Paul Heyman guy? Brock Lesnar, and he split! Just like I'm splitting! But the biggest difference between me and Brock is I'm going to leave with the WWE Championship.
"I've grabbed so many of Vincent K. McMahon's imaginary brass rings that it's finally dawned on me: They're just that. Completely imaginary. The only thing that's real is me, and the fact that day in and day out, for almost six years, I have proved to everybody in the world that I am the best-- on this microphone, in that ring, even at commentary!-- nobody can touch me! And yet, no how many-- no matter how many times I prove it... I'm not on your lovely little collector cups, I'm not on the cover of the program, I'm barely promoted, I don't get to be in movies, I'm certainly not on any crappy show on the USA Network... I'm not on the poster at WrestleMania, I'm not in the signature that's produced at the start of the show! I'm not on Conan O'Brien, I'm not on Jimmy Fallon, but the fact of the matter is, I should be, and trust me, this isn't sour grapes, but the fact that Dwayne is in the main event of WrestleMania next year and I'm not makes me sick!
"Oh and hey-- lemme get something straight-- those of you who are cheering me right now?! You are just as big a part of me leaving as anything else! Because you're the ones that are sipping out of those collector cups right now, you're the ones that buy those programs that my face isn't on the cover of, and then at 5 in the morning at the airport, you try to shove it in my face at the airport so you can get an autograph and try to sell it on eBay because you're too lazy to go get a real job!
"I'm leaving with the WWE Championship on July 17, and hell-- who knows, maybe I'll go defend it in New Japan Pro Wrestling, maybe I'll go back to Ring of Honor!" *turns to the camera and waves again* "Hey, Colt Cabana, how ya doin'? The reason I'm leaving is you people because after I'm gone, you're still gonna pour money into this company; I'm just a spoke on the wheel. The wheel's gonna keep turning, and I understand that.
"But Vince McMahon's gonna make money despite himself. He's a millionaire who should be a billionaire. You know why he's not a billionaire? It's 'cuz he surrounds himself with glad-handing, nonsensical, [redacted-- looked like "douchebag"] yes-men like John Laurinaitis, who's gonna tell him everything that he wants to hear! And I'd like to think that maybe this company will be better after Vince McMahon's dead, but the fact is, it's gonna get taken over by his idiotic daughter and his doofus son-in-law and the rest of his stupid family! Let me tell you a personal story about Vince McMahon! All right? When we do this whole 'bully' campai--"
The microphone cuts off in mid-word, and Punk taps it several times and tries speaking into it to no avail. He gets an "oh, okay, I get it!" look on his face, talks a little more (inaudibly), and gets up, spreading his hands in the air. He says something that sounds like, "Who designed this?", gestures to himself, points to the camera and makes threatening sounds, and the audio and video feed cut out entirely.
And I'll agree: This is one of the most brilliant promos I've ever seen.
(edited by ekedolphin on 28.6.11 0206)
(edited by ekedolphin on 28.6.11 0208)
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"I find, when your wife is cheating, it's best to put her in an oven for two hours at 450 degrees." --Ryan Stiles, Whose Line is It Anyway?
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Co-Winner of Time's Person of the Year Award, 2006
OMG!!!! Punk was strait going off! Finally some entertainment on Raw. Glad to see Nikki get some ring time at least. and like it's been said, WRESTLING, on Raw no less. I have to say that between some nice Divas matches on Superstars lately and this Raw, WWE got much closer to my good side tonight than they have in a while. Well done.
Originally posted by ekedolphinYou know why he's not a billionaire? It's 'cuz he surrounds himself with glad-handing, nonsensical, [redacted-- looked like "douchebag"] yes-men like John Laurinaitis, who's gonna tell him everything that he wants to hear!
Up here, "douchebag" made it through and "yes-men" got blanked out.
The guess going around is that he was talking about Vince telling Zack Ryder that he was going to get a big spot on RAW and bringing his family in for the show in Zack's hometown a few weeks ago, and then not booking him on the show.
Sin Cara is eventually going to have to talk, right? I can't think of any successful wrestler who was mute who didn't at least have a manager to speak for them. Maybe Yokozuna once he got rid of Mr. Fuji.
Just realized the "What?" chant is officially ten years old. I wish there was some way to get rid of it. It may be fun to chant, but it's annoying as all hell on TV.
I don't get Kelly Kelly. What is her "thing" besides having two names? She doesn't do anything special and I guess is hot, but not more than Maryse or the Bellas. I can't help but wonder what would be happening if Kharma stuck around.
Lawler's commentary makes any match involving Vicki unwatchable, or at least unlistenable. It's stupid because she's really not fat and comes off as the bullying they're trying to stop.
Of all the nights to go to bed early. I am going to have youtube this and show it to the wife. And I thought Punk's line about Shawn not being on drugs on anymore was going to the controversial moment. Wow. Good for him.
The Wee Baby Sheamus.
Twitter: @realjoecarfley its a bit more toned down there. A bit.
Kim Kardashian's ass tried to break the internet a couple weeks ago and FAILED. Who knew it would take a CM Punk/Colt Cabana pipebombpodcast to do the trick?? Colt Cabana's external podcast archive page (http://tsmradio.com/coltcabana/)