Q'n'D -Dolph Ziggler d. John Morrison to retain the United States Championship -Beth Phoenix d. Eve Torres to retain the Divas Championship in a LumberJill Match -Team Barrett d. Team Orton (Wade Barrett & Cody Rhodes survive) -The Big Show d. Mark Henry by DQ -CM Punk d. Alberto Del Rio to win the WWE Championship -The Rock & John Cena d. Awesome Truth
LIVE from The Bowling Alley a friend's house. Yes, The Rock's return was enough to entice at least one sucker to order the PPV in their home. So let's jump in to the Survivor Series 25th Anniversary.
And oh, FUCK ME! Let's start off IMMEDIATELY with Super Dave Laurinaitis to put everyone to sleep! If he says something of importance here, hell if I know, because I completely tuned out.
Dolph Ziggler d. John Morrison to retain the United States Championship Michael Cole buries Morrison on his way to the ring, just so that we know for sure to not take him or this match seriously. It's staggering how the commentary continues to be as counter-productive as it is, with Cole proudly flying the banner of idiocy. Just to show how much the crowd cares about this match, they start with a thunderous "We Want Ryder" chant, so Cole and Booker make sure to bury him and the petition angle, too. Lovely.
As for the actual match itself, what can I say? No one's taking it seriously, so why should I? It's a shame, because Morrison looks on and Dolph looks like he's going through the motions, understandable when you consider that he still has another match to work later tonight. The Ryder chants are all over this match.
Dolph turns a tilt-a-whirl slam into a Sleeper Hold in a neat spot. Vickie gets involved and gets ejected. Morrison's knee to the head is countered and we get a pin reversal sequence. So let's fast-forward to the predictable ending: Starship Pain hits knees, Dolph hits the Zig Zag, pinfall. Yes, even with the benefit of Vickie being removed from ringside, Morrison chokes again. Why did they even bother with this match?
Post-match, Dolph brags about his win over the Ryder chants. Afterwards, Zack Ryder runs in to the biggest pop of the night so far. Ryder evades a Dolph beatdown and takes him down with the Rough Ryder. The crowd is just eating this up and is eagerly jumping in on the "WOO WOO WOO" chants. Ryder is such a can't-miss right now, it isn't even funny.
"The Glamazon" Beth Phoenix d. Eve Torres to retain the Divas Championship in a LumberJill Match The Divas all come out to Kelly's music. I'm shocked they're getting all the dead weight matches out of the way right off the bat.
Eve starts off strong and tries the dreaded ASS SHAKE TO THE FACE! Beth doesn't want any part of that unorthodox offense, so she rolls out and gets tossed back in. Eve's babyface comeback is greeted with total silence. Eve counters the Glam Slam and locks in a triangle choke to zero reaction. The heel Divas get on the apron, leading to a pin reversal sequence. Beth plays possum, allowing her to crotch Eve on the moonsault setup. That leads to a top-rope Glam Slam to get the win for Beth. Why, why, WHY would they waste such an AMAZINGLY COOL spot like that on a throwaway match against Eve Torres??? The LumberJill gimmick wound up meaning nothing in the end.
Backstage, CM Punk prepares for his match. David Otunga enters the picture and confronts Punk over beating up Michael Cole last Monday. Otunga delivers a message from Johnny Ace, demanding that Punk apologize to Michael Cole tonight. Punk says he'll think it over after he wins the title tonight.
Elsewhere backstage, The Rock is in his old tights with a mic! Rock tells stories about his experiences in MSG, including watching his father compete and making his own debut in '96. Rock runs through his old catchphrases, his past title wins, all leading to the "Finally" line. Rock promises Boots to Asses for Awesome Truth and makes sure to talk some trash to John Cena, too. Rock tells some more New York stories. Ok, how much promo time is Rocky getting? Seriously? This is running LONG! And now he's SINGING! We finally hit the "If ya smell" line to end this one. That promo ran just as long as each of the first two title matches!
Team Barrett d. Team Orton Announcers note that Randy Orton has won four SS Elimination matches in the past, with Orton being sole survivor in '04 and '05. A fun fact like that might have been nice to use to build up this match BEFORE the PPV started, but what do I know?
Kofi misses with Trouble in Paradise early and gets wiped out with a Dolph dropkick. Kofi's SOS is also countered, so Kofi escapes and tags out to Orton. Orton IMMEDIATELY hits Dolph with the RKO to eliminate him. Thanks for showing up, Dolph!
Team Barrett's remnants huddle up outside, so Orton attacks them all, just for the hell of it. Kofi and Sin Cara give us stereo planchas and Sin Cara COMPLETELY BOTCHES HIS and injures himself legit. D'oh! The match screeches to a complete halt, which sends the crowd into "We Want Ryder" chants. SC is eliminated, due to injury.
We try and get things going again with Orton and Rhodes. Mason Ryan comes in next and manhandles Cody with his limited offense. Match slows down, as we get a heat segment on Kofi, before Ryan gets tagged in again. Ryan plays around with Hunico a bit, but Cody gets a blind tag. Cody nails the Beautiful Disaster and Cross-Rhodes to eliminate Ryan to a pop from the crowd! That gets a "Cody" chant going! I'm guessing THAT'S not the reaction the E was hoping for.
Sheamus gets caught in the heel corner to start up the next heat segment. This match is so enthralling that the announcers start talking about Shawn Michaels. Yup. Tags are made on both sides to Kofi and Barrett. Kofi makes the mistake of trying to take out the four remaining Team Barrett members and gets hit with Wasteland. So long, Kofi!
Team Barrett work over Orton. Tags are made on both sides and Sheamus makes the babyface comeback against Swagger. Sheamus wipes out Hunico. Irish Curse on Swagger. Down goes Cody Rhodes! Sheamus tries for the High Cross and Barrett saves. Sheamus beats down Swagger on the ropes and goes past the five count for the LAAAAAAAAAAAAME DQ! Sheamus shows Swagger what he thinks of this with the Brogue Kick.
Orton covers off the Brogue Kick and eliminates Swagger.
The remaining three Team Barrett members all gang up on Orton. Orton makes the babyface comeback and hits Rhodes with the Hanging DDT! VIPER COIL! Barrett distracts Orton, allowing Rhodes to tag Hunico. Hunico springboards right into an RKO! So much for Hunico, as he gets pinned.
Rhodes swoops in and gets RKO'd, but that brief distraction allows Barrett to finish with Wasteland. Barrett and Rhodes are your survivors, or if you're Michael Cole, your "sole survivors".
Announcers note that Sin Cara has a ruptured patella tendon and he'll be out for a while.
Backstage, the Bellas admire Alberto Del Rio. Super Dave Laurinaitis enters the picture and wants Del Rio to take tonight's match seriously. Del Rio reminds Laurinaitis that he laid out Punk last Monday. Del Rio exits and Laurinaitis TEXTS! OOOOOOH, A TEXT MESSAGE! HOW TRENDY!
We take a look at the ring getting reinforced for the Big Show/Mark Henry match. It's only 6:10pm and we're down to our last three matches, so let's waste some time with a long Big Show/Mark Henry video package!
The Big Show d. "The World's Strongest Man" Mark Henry by DQ Announcers pimp out TLC, the next PPV, which could be an unintentionally funny method of foreshadowing. The crowd starts this match off with "Daniel Bryan" chants. Oh, that can't be good.
Both men exchange power moves to start. Then we move into...a WRESTLING SEQUENCE? WHA??? Henry bails and stalls. Show works over Henry in the corner and gets pulled off, allowing Henry to stall some more. Henry follows this up with more stalling. Zzzzzzz! Henry clips the ankle and starts working on it with some methodical offense and the crowd is dozing off. The ones that are still awake are chanting "Boring." Crowd's now chanting "Daniel Bryan". Henry tries to pick things up by hitting Show with the World's Strongest Slam...for 2! Henry hits the big fat splash...for 2! Big fat elbow also gets 2! The crowd is NOT reacting to any of this. Henry still has one trick to wake up this fickle crowd! He TACKLES SHOW THROUGH THE BARRICADE! And that finally wakes the crowd, who react with "Holy Shit" chants. Announcers note that this won for Henry against Sheamus at SummerSlam. Show does manage to beat the count, however, and makes it back into the ring. And now we go to the top rope, as Henry sets up the superplex. Show shoves him off and hits a superkick. Show goes to the top rope! SHOW HITS A SAVAGE ELBOW!!! HOLY SHIT!!! IT ONLY GETS 2!!! Show got good distance on that move, too! Crowd's alive now and starts chanting "Randy Savage". Show tries for the Mayweather Sucker Punch, but Henry ducks it and nails Show with a Greco-Roman Kick in the Nuts for the DQ! OH, FUCK THAT FINISH TO HELL!
Post-match, Henry goes for the Pillmanizer. Show avoids it and takes Henry out with the Mayweather Sucker Punch. Crowd's chanting "Daniel Bryan", hoping for a briefcase cash-in, but it's not happening. Now Show wants the Pillmanizer! Show Pillmanizes Henry's knee with a legdrop! EMT's swoop in and the stretcher arrives, as Big Show's music hits. Show leaves, as the EMT's try to stretcher Henry out. Sigh...you bastards, I was KIDDING when I said that the TLC promo was foreshadowing!
Backstage, Matt Striker talks to Wade Barrett. Barrett talks about wanting to be World Champion, but Awesome Truth enter the picture. Barrett disparages them and exits. Awesome Truth feel like afterthoughts, as usual. Yup.
Let's waste some time with a video package for Alberto Del Rio/CM Punk.
Justin Roberts brings in Ricardo Rodriguez to introduce Alberto Del Rio. Justin Roberts then brings in, at the challenger's request, HOWARD FINKEL to introduce CM Punk! Fink gets one of the biggest pops of the night. Now that's an awesome moment! At least it should be, except instead of selling it as an awesome moment, the announce team are all treating it like a joke. God, I wish they'd all get hit by a bus.
CM Punk d. Alberto Del Rio for the WWE Championship I got called outside for the bulk of this match. I came back in time to see Punk try for the GTS, but Del Rio counters with the backcracker. Enziguiri gets 2! We get a fight on the top and Del Rio gets knocked off. Savage Elbow hits and gets 2! Punk tries for the GTS and it leads to a reversal sequence. Del Rio's able to get the jujigatime, but Punk reaches the ropes. Punk comes back and takes out Ricardo. Del Rio tries for the tights-assisted roll-up, but Punk turns it into the Anaconda Vise for the subission and the title!
Video package sets up the main event.
The Rock & Fruity Pebble Connection d. Awesome Truth The "Cena Sucks" chants start up even before Cena makes his entrance. Cena comes out to huge heel heat and he plays it off with his smarmy "too cool for school" (credit: geemoney) attitude that everybody hates. Rock's entrance completely blows the roof off the joint and, needless to say, he gets the biggest pop of the night. Rock still looks to be in good shape, so let's see what he's got.
Rock starts off with Miz and outwrestles him. Truth comes in and it's armdrags for everyone! Truth gets dumped! Big pop, as Rock looks like he's still got it! Even MSG chants "You still got it"! Miz comes back in and Rock motions for Truth to "Just Bring It", so Truth gets tagged in. Rock grabs a side headlock and we get the dueling Let's Go Cena/Cena Sucks chants! Rock and Truth give us a dazzling reversal sequence. Cena and Miz go at it and the referee is distracted with Cena, as Rock hits a fisherman's suplex (!) on Truth with no ref to count! Miz comes in and banters with Rock, demanding Cena. Rock gives Cena the "Grr, I hate you!" slap tag. Cena starts off with a wrestling sequence, as even his snapmares are drawing heel heat. Truth tags in and Cena gives him The Usual. He stops before the Five-Knuckle Shuffle and gives Rock the "You Can't See Me", which allows Truth to waffle Cena from behind. Long heat segment on Cena ensues. Cena tries to power Truth into the Attitude Adjustment, but Truth floats over and hits the Falcon Arrow for 2. Announcers note that Rock was thinking about making the save, which of course begs the question, why does Rock care if he loses? Miz stares down Rock and the distraction allows Cena to clamp on the shitty STF before Truth makes the save. Truth tags in, but gets got! Cena crawls over for the tag, so Miz takes out Rock! Truth then disposes of The Rock on the outside, while Miz hits the chinlock. NOW Rock's annoyed, but the ref holds him back, allowing Awesome Truth to work over Cena some more. Rock finally gets the hot tag and Rock makes the babyface comeback! Rock Bottom for Truth! Sharpshooter for Miz! Miz hangs on long enough for Truth to DDT Rock. Cena disposes of Truth. Miz talks trash, so Rock gives him the spinebuster and finishes with the People's Elbow! Well, that was certainly anti-climactic.
Well, Awesome Truth came in with zero chance to win. Good to know they met our lowered expectations.
Post-match, Cena applauds from the outside. Rock wants Cena back in the ring. Cena comes back in and Rock gives him some words. We then get a corner pose-off. Rock clearly wins this one. Rock gives Cena some more words and poses again. We get a meeting between Rock and Cena in the middle of the ring. Cena eats a Rock Bottom! Cena mouths off to The Rock from the ramp and slinks to the back. Show ends with Rock taking a bow and posing for the crowd.
Another bad PPV in a series of them. The main event and Punk/Del Rio matches both felt anti-climactic and Big Show/Mark Henry couldn't have gone worse. The Survivor Series elimination match was a lot more boring than I thought and I don't think anybody bought the idea of Orton coming back 4-on-1. All in all, just a bad show and yet again, the two title matches were all about setting up the next PPV.
Thumbs down for Rock's big return. Until next time!
Rock/Cena vs Awesome Truth was really weird and turned out to be a pretty boring match. Awesome Truth was never a threat and had no real heat, and nobody wanted Cena in the ring so all we have left is The Rock an awkward situation.
Everyone knew the buildup for this match was terrible, but I kind of figured everyone would get in the ring and it would all work itself out. It didn't.
To top it all off a simple People's Elbow finished the whole deal. Then Rock and Cena follow it up with a clumsy looking showdown, Cena looks like he gets his feelings hurt, Rock gives him the Rock Bottom and Cena does one of the worst sell jobs of that move ever.
This match wasn't bowling shoe ugly, but we've seen this done many times before on Raw and Smackdown and often times done better. I know they added this to SummerSlam to get as much out of Rock as they can and add to the WrestleMania hype, but one has to wonder if this type of showing is going to cost them future buys.
Wanted more from the main event. If their goal is to make Cena the underdog of Rock/Cena, I guess it makes sense although it's kinda hard to do with his track record. Either they're setting up a heel turn or a more aggressive John Cena. Wasn't bad, wasn't great, but still kept Cena and Rock in the right spot.
CM Punk vs Alberto Del Rio was magical. Perfect MSG title match execution. I hope Del Rio stays away from the belt for a bit. He can be a credible challenger, but I don't think he needs the belt back for the foreseeable future.
Money in the Bank was a great way to get CM Punk over with the belt, but I see that now as more of a personal title win whereas tonight was really a christening of CM Punk as WWE Champion after the mess that's ensued since MITB.
The kick to the balls finish would have been better had it not been used in Christian/Orton earlier this year, but it was still a great big man match.
The show was awesome if you're Zack Ryder, CM Punk, or the Rock. Anybody else not so much.
Rock didn't miss a beat, the guy is a natural. Show was just "pay for Rock's first match" and they delivered no more and no less. Certainly no more. Match was just an exhibition of "Rock wrestling for the first time."
Punk winning and the reaction that got was cool stuff.
I thought it really took the show down a lot to not do the Ryder title shot. Not only did they willfully give up what would've been an amazing moment to gain nothing, but they hurt Ziggler and Morrison's really good work on top of that. And putting Ziggler in the tag match to lose right way was a big waste that undid anything he gained by looking like a superstar at the beginning of the show.
The Sheamus DQ, get out of town. Pleasantly surprised they actually built a heel for Orton.
Sin Cara. "Now Trending #1 Worldwide: SIN CARA" yeah congratulations idiots.
Big Show's still trying to steady himself on the top rope. What a perfect setup for a CHAIRS MATCH
No Wrestlemania opponents have ever teamed before. OK.
After netting him a 30-day suspension and a blown dive (and knee), it's probably time they burn the Sin Cara Blanco outfit.
Boggles the mind how what is supposedly the biggest wrestling product in the world is run on the whims of an old man so out of touch with reality. Rock basically showed he wasn't rusty while AweTruth did the bulk of the work while the faces got to sell and stand on the apron.
Otherwise this felt like more of "Twitter presents Survivor Series starring folks who Tweet on their Twitters, and trend on their Twitter. Twitter Twitter Twitter!"
Originally posted by my own live tweeting during the showI've just paid for a WWE product. #nothingtodo ... Am I watching Rock or a very charismatic Dave Batista? #biggerthanusual ... Cody Rhodes with kneepads is just wrong. ... @WadeBarrett has finally run out of that invincible hair gel. #sadness ... No offense to @JustinRoberts but @howardfinkel 's announcing skills are SORELY missed. ... wilw Wil Wheaton OMG THE STUPID IT BURNS. (not really SS-related, but felt oddly appropriate) ... Good job @CMPunk . Now please @WWE give him a new belt. Sorry, championship.
My side is the side of love, peace and submachine guns.
This report up there is so overly negative that it is hard for me to even take it seriously. Complaining about Rock's long promos, complaining about Beth "wasting" the top rope Glam Slam (what the hell is this even supposed to MEAN???), complaining about running time, match endings....seriously, if you feel so bad about everything, why waste your time with detailed thoughts? Q'n'D would suffice.
Originally posted by UnsUweThis report up there is so overly negative that it is hard for me to even take it seriously. Complaining about Rock's long promos, complaining about Beth "wasting" the top rope Glam Slam (what the hell is this even supposed to MEAN???), complaining about running time, match endings....seriously, if you feel so bad about everything, why waste your time with detailed thoughts? Q'n'D would suffice.
So you....liked the show? Didn't like it? I get the impression you may not have actually seen it.
I'm way too tired to really post a big thing right now, so I'll just say this: as someone who's been listening to Sick Of It All since like 1992, hearing the MSG crowd yell "It's Clobberin' Time!" along with Punk was pretty fn' sick.
Enjoyed the show for Punk being great, Ziggler continuing to be the best heel not named "Mark Henry", Rock's unbelievably unrusty performance, and Ryder getting a WWWYKI from MSG. Nothing was outright bad except for stretches of the Show-Henry match. Not sure what they were thinking with the booking there.
Great night for Punk. I especially liked his entrance and his celebration with the fans. Match was ok as well. I hope they give him a real and strong title reign this time.
Rock looked great in the ring, but at the end of the night I just had no other choice as to finally turn on him, because he was such an ahole, I couldn't take it anymore. The same goes for the crowd. Yes, I am officially a member of Cenation now .. at least till Wrestlemania. Can't believe I'm saying this.
I actually thought it was one of the better shows. Morrison/Zigs gets some time which no one expected and Ryder gets his moment. Beth and Eve have the best match you get out of Eve. Rock cuts a promo that the crowd enjoyed and the folks I were with enjoyed as well. The Survivor Series match ends the Sinn Carra experiment and elevating Wade and Rhodes.
Punk wins and has and Eddie Guerrero celebration with the MSG crowd who was eating up everything he did. Rock looked better than a good chunk of the roster in the ring while Cena ate the Rock Bottom to send everyone home happy.
Minus Big Show/Henry which did get good at the end, it was a pretty great show. We didn't have to deal with Nash/HHH. Everyone who deserved the spotlight got it and the fans seems to like what they saw from Rock. Fink coming out to introduce Punk was inspired and even though he soaked it up to the point Punk pointed to his watch hearing him say "And New World Champion..CM Punk" was awesome.
Usually I am the negative Nancey on the board about this product, but I spent $45 and I don't feel ripped off quite the opposite. I am also excited about going to Raw which hasn't happened for awhile. To me, they did everything right last night, the only thing they could have done more with is maybe turning Cena, but at this point its not going to happen. I know people are going to pat Awesome Truth on the back, but man did on one give a shit about them when they were beating down Cena or its another indicator no one gives a shit about Cena and keeping him face is borderline retarded at this point.
(edited by lotjx on 21.11.11 0724)
(edited by lotjx on 21.11.11 0725) The Wee Baby Sheamus.
Twitter: @realjoecarfley its a bit more toned down there. A bit.
I keep having the same thought run through my head whenever I hear about these WWE ringtones.... I imagine a guy in a bar, trying to chat up a pretty young lady, and maybe he's making a bit of headway, but then his cell phone rings.