TV PG DLV entertainment SmackDown! open - wait now RAW - ah it's both. Super Tuesday. The first voices you hear are JR and Lawler - as we pan the RAW arena (no location given) and the SmackDown! arena (no location given.) This comes off incredibly taped (sound levels don't sound right for the opening of a show - maybe it's because no fireworks?)
Since the RAW guys got to talk first, the first desk shot goes to Tazz and Michael Cole who welcome us to this "joint production". The road to Survivor Series (5 days away) goes through Super Tuesday. First thing - let's go to the back for a special announcement.
WWE Tag Team Champions Stephanie McMahon (well why else does she have both belts - must've been quite a victory over Rey and Edge!) "Yes, thank you Michael. Last Thursday night, SmackDown! crowned brand new WWE Tag Team champions, Edge and Rey Mysterio. But due to the incredible high level of competition for the tag team titles, I've decided that at Survivor Series, it will be a Triple Threat tag team match for the WWE Tag Team Championships featuring Kurt Angle and Chris Benoit vs the Guerreros vs Edge and Rey Mysterio. But tonight, as a preview to Survivor Series, right here on Super Tuesday, we will have a triple threat match, featuring Chris Benoit vs Eddie Guerrero vs Edge. And gentleman - for safekeeping, for tonight, I'll be holding on to the belts." Ah there you go.
WWE Tag Team Champion Edge (Toronto, ON, 241 pounds) vs Eddie Guerrero (El Paso, TX, 228 pounds - WWE Anthology) vs Chris Benoit (Edmonton, AB, 229 pounds) in a Triple Threat match - Cole has about 12 MOTYC from this show by now. It still doesn't make sense that it was a fourth fall and not a continuation but why should I expect that. Champions are 1-0 in Survivor Series Triple Threat Tag Team matches - well, the one I can think of right now. Shockingly, Cole hasn't picked up his copy of WWE Anthology yet. Cole suggests that Eddie can't be at 100% after this past Thursday. On the other hand, it's not like Edge and Chris were playing Chutes and Ladders. (That's someone else entirely.) Eddie waits outside the ring and sneaks around the outside. Benoit walks right in, and Edge is caught between two - Edge chooses to look at the man outside the ring, and get punked out by the man in the ring to start the match. Kick down in the corner. Turnbuckle smash. Corner chop. Now with the other hand. Kick. Headbutt. Eddie is just now getting up on the apron - Benoit slams Edge's head into another corner, and would be one corner away from winning this if it was some bizarre strap match. Eddie is back to watching this on the floor. CHOP. Back into the corner. Corner whip, reversed, Chris goes in back first Edge with a back forearm, back suplex. Off the ropes, legdrop tot he back of the neck one two Eddie breaks it up. Eddie working over Edge with shots to the head. Kick to the ribs. Whip, back elbow. Eddie celebrates, and spots Benoit coming with his own back elbow too late. Baaack suplex. Cole brings up Eddie and Chris' past relationship - Chris with a corner whip, kick, chop, chop - now Edge in with a forearm for Edge, Chop for both, punches for both, now just working on Eddie in the corner with punches. Edge is pumped, Cole is delivering an ad for SmackDown! Rey Mysterio vs Eddie Guerrero on this Thursday's show - someone could put together a killer video package to hype that up if they had the time/effort. Also Kurt Angle vs Chris Benoit in the "we promise - no clean finish!" match of the night. Edge with a whip for Benoit, reversed, Benoit gets up the knee. One two NO. Eddie stomps Benoit. Picking him up - right. Edge rolls out to rest. Whip, reversed, Benoit misses the back elbow, double clothesline takes them both down. What a better time to take a break
We're back and Eddie is giving Edge a back suplex. Benoit is getting up a little ways away in the ring, but Eddie apparently still thinks he's got time to hook on the Lasso From El Paso - Benoit dropkick to break it up. Benoit picks up Eddie - suplex one two no. Double Feature replay shows Edge hitting a top rope clothesline on both men. Eddie with a right, Benoit with a kick, right, kick, Edge over with an axhandle and a kick to take down Benoit. Whip for Eddie - there's the flapjack. Right for Chris, whip, flapjack for him! PANCAKES FOR EVERYONE! Edge going up - Eddie is up and after him with a right to stop him. Eddie climbing and punching Edge, but Benoit is up and attacking Eddie from behind. Benoit picks up Eddie on his shoulders - Edge to the top - Eddie takes a missile dropkick off Benoit's shoulders! Benoit is stunned from delivering the Electric Chair part (referenced by Tazz) - Eddie covers Edge one two NO. Edge and Benoit up - Edge misses a right, Benoit with a release German suplex! Folded him in half - Eddie up - kick for Benoit, suplex, one two no. Eddie hops up - he's quick to the top rope - FROG SPLASH MISSES! Edge over - Faceplant for Eddie! Faceplant - no, CROSSFACE on Edge! He's in the middle of the ring with nowhere to go - Eddie dives at Chris, Chris avoids and locks Eddie right in the Crossface! Edge manages to get to his feet - dropkick to both their faces! Edge with a whip for Benoit, reversed, Benoit misses a left, SPEAR. Eddie with a forearm to the back, which allows Chris to get out - Whip, no reversed into a kick Edguecution! Edge cover one two NO Mike Choida pulled out (called by Cole a beat before we saw it happen) - Chavo Guerrero has made it to ringside. Edge runs - sliding dropkick knocks Chavo into Choida into a cameraman! Edge whip, no Chavo reverses and Edge's shoulder runs him into the post. Rey Mysterio is out - rights to Chavo, beating him around the ring. Whip, reversed, Rey jumps on the barricade and back with an Asai Moonsault! But now he's grabbing his knee - that's not good. Back in the ring, Benoit misses a short clothesline on Eddie, Eddie hooks him in an armbar, forearms to the back of the neck, brain-no Chris lands behind, CROSSFACE! Eddie has no place to go and it looks like he's taping but no ref. Kurt Angle is out - he throws Choida in the ring - right into Chris and Eddie to break up the hold! Benoit yells at Angle (who seems to be claiming he did it on accident) and now they're jawing on the apron - Eddie runs Benoit into angle, inside cradle one two three (7:15 shown) we didn't get a good shot, but I bet he has tights there. Story is that Angle was trying to do the right thing but it went very wrong. Angle and Benoit are still having words, but they're separated by a long distances. Replay - yep, he got them tights. Edie and Chavo celebrate.
Still to come - that big ten man tag!
Big Show looks really tall for this camera angle - looks like he's coming out to join us.
The Sleeping Giant Awakes - Brock gets no bounce (3:21)
the Big Show is walking to the ring, which gives us plenty of time to do anything else. Everyone is wearing their outfits from last Thursday - must be some sort of wacky coincidence. "I would like to quote Brock Lesnar's agent "Brock you can't beat the Big Show!" You can't beat me! I've called you out face to face, and what happened? I punked you out. And then I drove you through the announce table. And more recently, I press slammed you off the stage! What could you do about it? Not a damn thing! That's why this Sunday at Survivor Series, I will be the next W-W-E Champion!" Thanks for coming.
Up next - Trish vs Torrie in an Interpromotional Bikini Match (aka Tazz to says "Tomatos" many times")
Jerry Lawler and Jim Ross welcome us back to the show - they hype up the 10 man tag (5 of the 6 superstars in the Elimination Chamber are in the match) and send us off to an Elimination Chamber video that's really a Survivor Series plug (1:00)
Tazz welcomes us to the first ever Interpromotional ("by the way, that means RAW vs SmackDown!") bikini match
Torrie Wilson vs WWE Women's Champion Trish Stratus (WWE Anthology) in a Interpromotional Bikini Match - Tazz notes that this is a rematch from the Internet Babe of The Year contest. Torrie's opted for the lollypop as an accessory to her black robe. Cole notes that Torrie's in a better mood than you'd expect after Thursday. Trish's coat opens enough that we can pretty much see her outfit before the "match" even starts, but that's okay. Trish vs Victoria in a Hardcore Match for the Title on Sunday - we can only hope we get no Dawn/Torrie rematch but it sure seems possible. Handshake. Tazz does his rules explanation. Tazz: "Trish, this is probably the biggest moment of your life and your career - well, maybe not." Trish's bikini is black and sparkly. Torrie's bikini is flesh colored and sparkly. Such a hard choice. Cole: "Torrie is the all time leader in bikini match victories." I'm glad someone's keeping record. Tazz: "Tremendous! Here comes the big decision [pause - to fan] Oh, it's that big, trust me bro". Cheers for Trish. Cheers for Torrie. Sounds about even, maybe a little bit to Torrie but it's all fake noise anyway. Just as Tazz is about to announce a winner, Nidia is out - Torrie tripped and pulled out. Right for Trish misses, Trish with a forearm forearm forearm, whip and Torrie pulls her out - slap. Nidia walks off, and Trish helps Torrie back in the ring. They raise each other's hands. Hug. I guess Trish won because they're playing her music. Why did Nidia run out anyway? Cole says that's the end for SmackDown! We split screen back to RAW and to -
In "San Antonio, TX", Shawn Michaels gets a microphone on - JR and King talk to him, next.
HBK from SummerSlam to Last Night. Actually, we end with the Pedigree ON HBK, rather than show the other one. (1:42)
Shawn Michaels is sitting in San Antonio, wearing a Jesus Saves barcode shirt - what, on Mountain Dew? What can we expect? "One word, Jim: Wild! Crazy! Chaotic! Okay, that's three words - one thing I can tell you, it's gonna be every man for himself. Six man going in that ring, with one goal in mind - come out the World Champion. My motivation is very simple - Triple H bases everyone ounce of his being, his reason for existence, on being the World Champion - that's his reason for living. After everything that he's put me and my family through over the last couple months, I figure the least I can do, is ruin his life. It's not nice, it's not moral, but that's my goal - take that title from around his waist, that championship title, take away way, you take away his reason for living." King asks who's going to win - "I don't know King - one thing I guarantee you is that I'm not going to allow Triple H to walk out of that ring with the World Championship. And if by some miracle, yours truly, HBK, walks out of the ring as World Champion - oh ho ho - you better believe, there's going to be a new sheriff in town." Immediately to
World Champion Triple H (no introduction, w/Ric Flair) vs - ad break.
Last Night - Jericho chair shot Kane, RVD, Kane, Kane, Kane, RVD, RVD, and Christian.
Triple H, Jamal, Rosie, Chris Jericho and Christian (w/Ric Flair and Rico) vs Booker T (256 pounds), Kane (326 pounds), Jeff Hardy (Cameron, NC, 218 pounds), Bubba Ray Dudley (310 pounds) and Rob Van Dam (Battle Creek, MI, 235 pounds) - no introductions for the rest of the heels (time? Jericho's music change?) Good that Ric and Rico put their differences behind them, Kane and Booker T aren't having problems, Jeff isn't hurt from the table - King notes that, though JR is all about calling him resilient. Look at all those people with no hometowns - it sure is lonely being a wrestler. Faces hung out at the base of the stage but now everyone is in the ring and Jericho is talking big. No prematch fight - looks like it'll sort itself out with Jeff and Jamal. Jamal has words with someone in the face corner - Bubba? RVD? Lockup - no Jamal with a kick. Right. Whip, baackdrop. Stomp. Jamal sure talking a bunch tonight. Tag to Christian, who gets a kick. Right. Whip, clothesline misses, Jeff slides under, poses, Christian charges - drop toe hold, double low blow legdrop. Tag to Bubba. Armbar, hold for a Bubba right. Right. Open hand slap. Right. Open hand slap. Bubba to Jamal: "I got one for you to!" That answers that - corner whip, charge splash hits! Right right right flip flop fly elbow hits one two no. Whip, head down too soon, Christian kicks it, off the ropes, into a flapjack. Tag to RVD. RVD walks into a kick, right, RVD with a right, Christian tag to Jamal. Jamal misses with aright, RVD with rights of his own, Jamal ends that with a knee. Forearm to the back of the neck. Corner whip, charging splash but no one's there. RVD top the top - off the top rope kick, mooonsault cover one two NO. Forearms, off the ropes, ducks the clothesline, Jamal has his head down too soon, RVD kicks it, Jamal pops up and clothesline shim. Tag to Triple H. Kick to the midsection. Head to the corner. Right. right right right right right. Triple H distracts Hebner and Booket T is in to argue that - that allows the others to attack RVD. Jericho with the fake tag to come in - baack suplex. "King of the world!" Stomping. Whip, Jericho goes for a dropkick, RVD grabs the ropes (camera angle makes it look like Jericho tried the dropkick very late), RVD off the ropes, Rolling Thunder. RVD crawling for a tag - tag to Kane, I guess tag to Triple H because he in - right, right, corner whip, clothesline. Right for Jericho, right for Christian, right for Rosie, misses Rosie with the full nelson, Jericho charges into a a boot, Kane back elbows out and punches Rosie off the apron. Goozle for Triple H - Christian jumps off into a goozle - double kick to get free. Double whip but Kane back with a double clothesline. Jericho in - Jericho thrown on Sidewalk slam on Triple H. Lawler: "I would say Kane is on fire, but I don't want to go there." JR: "Kane is absolutely on fire - as you said!" Kane going up - top rope clothesline on Triple H one two Jamal pulls him off in plenty of time. Jamal and Rosie on Kane, Bubba and Booker To over to help, now it's al breaking loose. RVD is in the ring on Christian, Bubba is working over Triple H on the outside. Inside, RVD flips over Christina and hits him with a spinning back hell kick - spin kick for Jericho 'rana - no, Jericho gets the Walls of Jericho - but Booker is in with a side kick to break it up. Scissors kick on Jericho - Spinarooni! Christian back up - reverse DDT. Bubba Bomb on Christian - Jericho with a clothesline for Bubba to take him out, Booker with a clothesline on Jericho to take him out. Jeff to the top - Swanton Bomb on Christian. Christian rolls out as Jamal and Rosie are in and attacking Jeff -w hip into Jamal's press Samoan Drop. Bubba in with a clothesline for Rosie - but Jamal takes him out with a thrust kick. Jamal going up - but Kane is back in - "super chokeslam". Triple H - kick to the gut, Pedigrees- no backdrop. Goozle - chokeslam. One two Christian breaks it up. Christian with rights, but Kane with a kick for him - pres sand throw on to Rosie and Rico on the outside - Jericho with a missile dropkick on Kane. RVD up top - PTS - Five Star Frog Splash for Jamal! Jericho in - chairshot misses, Van Daminator on Jericho! RVD looks at the crowd gathering near the ramp - running no hands somersault plancha to about six people. Kane in, he's gonna - get hit by a Ric Flair chair shot. Thanks for showing up, Ric! Pedigree one two three (8:25) Hey they WERE the legal men. Triple H won't have Ric Flair there to help Sunday (we think) - will Triple H still be champion?
Awesome, awesome, awesome, Bulldog. Great job handling the show. I can only hope my ITR lives up to expectations. Oh wait...what I meant to say was: Fire me? I'm already fired! Fire me? I'm already fired!