TONIGHT! It's a LIVE Super SmackDown! And tonight's main event is a Champion vs. Champion match featuring CM Punk facing Daniel Bryan! This is what I like to call The E apologizing for the last couple of shows. I accept your apology, The E. Don't let it happen again. SmackDown is NOW!
WWE - The Champ Is Here!
Opening credits - Do You Know Your Enemy? Opening pyro! Tonight, it's a Champion vs. Chammpion match with CM Punk facing Daniel Bryan! Plus, The Big Show faces Mark Henry! Ooh...how much do you want to bet this was supposed to be Big Show facing Wade Barrett?
LILIAN GARCIA welcomes in World Heavyweight Champion DANIEL BRYAN, who comes out here with AJ in tow. I was starting to wonder what happened to her. Your hosts are the three dipsticks. We see still photos of Bryan winning the SD Chamber match and Sheamus disposing of him afterwards. Bryan has the mic and it's promo time!
Daniel: Ahem...ahem...back in July, when I won the SmackDown Money in the Bank contract and I said I was going to main event Wrestlemania, there was not a single person in this arena who believed me. There was not a single person watching at home that believed. Yet here I stand as YOUR World Heavyweight Champion! And, might I add, I'm heading to the main event of Wrestlemania! Santino Marella...he was trying to channel Rocky Balboa heading into the Elimination Chamber match this past Sunday, but I am a role model. I am the REAL Rocky story! Santino, The Great Khali, Cody Rhodes, Wade Barrett...The Big Show, I beat them all! You want Rocky? Yo, AJ! I DID IT! YES! YES! YES! But...as I was celebrating, physically-spent after defeating five other men in one of the most grueling and barbaric matches ever constructed...my moment was ruined. My moment was ruined by Sheamus. Well, now it's my turn. I am going to ruin Sheamus' moment at Wrestlemania. I will show Sheamus, I will show all of you, I will show everyone watching all over the world, that I will be victorious! Just like tonight when I will be victorious against CM Punk! You want to talk about the best in the world...
Interruption comes from THE MIZ, of all people. Um...ok?
Miz: Well, look at you. The World Heavyweight Champion. Who'da thunk it? But you know what, Daniel? You're wrong. You are so wrong. You weren't the only one that believed that you would become a world champion, I knew you would. I mentored you. I molded you into becoming a world champion. From the first day that I was your pro on NXT, I knew you had the skill, I knew you had the temperment and the determination to become a world champion. But I'm not out here asking for thanks. Mmm-mmm. I'm not here to steal your spotlight, I'm simply out here to say congratulations. Congratulations on being in the main event of Wrestlemania, just like I did last year. So, as you continue to follow in my footsteps and take the skills that I taught, and after you embarrass Sheamus as Wrestlemania, I think one day we should form a tag team. And this is not just like any other...
Next interruption comes from SHEAMUS and NOW I can see where this is going.
Sheamus: I, too, would like to congratulate you, Daniel Bryan. I would like to congratulate you on being a massive arse. I would like to congratulate you on being a hyprocrite. You see, you're no role model. You're just a coward. You'd rather hide behind a woman's skirt, than stand up and fight like a man. By the way, I'd also like to congratulate you on hanging out with someone ALMOST as conceited as you. Good job, fella! Good job! The thing is, Daniel, when Wrestlemania is over, nobody's going to be congratulating you. They're going to be saying that you got exactly what you deserved.
Miz: Let me tell you what you deserve. You deserve to be taken down a notch or two. How...dare...YOU come out here and interrupt me and try to steal the thunder of the world champion, Daniel Bryan?
Sheamus: Do me a favor, will you? Why don't you let the lads that actually HAVE a match at Wrestlemania talk, will ya?
Sheamus turns around and eats a slap from Bryan. Bryan bails and Miz attacks from behind. That doesn't last long and Sheamus quickly dumps Miz, as Bryan escapes with AJ. That abruptly takes us to our first...
We apppaer to have immediately segued into...
THE MIZ v. "THE GREAT WHITE" SHEAMUS We see Sheamus holding on to an armbar. This match was made by Teddy Long during the break. Miz gets backdropped onto the apron and we get the ten-count chest strikes. Sheamus tosses Miz back in and hits the slingshot shoulderblock for 2. Miz hangs Sheamus' arm to take brief control, but runs into a clothesline. Corner charge eats the steel post and Sheamus falls to the outside. Miz hits a single-arm DDT for 1. Time to hit the armbar. Miz works over the arm in the corner. Straddling clothesline hits. Savage axehandle hits and running boot gets 1. We hit the hammerlock. Sheamus suddenly makes the babyface comeback. Irish Curse gets 2. Corner charge eats elbow and Miz hits the backbreaker/neckbreaker for 2. Sheamus powers out of the Skull-Crushing Finale attempt and misses the Brogue Kick. Miz rolls up Sheamus for 2, but Sheamus quickly finishes with the Celtic Cross.
WINNER: Sheamus - Miz's stock has dropped big time. Coincidentally, it's been dropping since before Survivor Series. Imagine that.
Backstage, Teddy Long plays around with Aksana. God, how I wish this would go somewhere, already. Aksana wants Long in charge of both shows and makes sexual innuendos. Super Dave Laurinaitis and David Otunga enter the picture and deride Long for his unprofessional behavior. Long tells Laurinaitis that he picked an office for him and Otunga tonight. Long says it's the men's room. Otunga says Long should be in the dumpster, like Ezekiel Jackson after he beats him later. Oh God, are they wrestling AGAIN? Long sends Laurinaitis and Otunga on their way.
Ad break - Raw promo
KOFI KINGSTON & R-TRUTH v. DOLPH ZIGGLER & "THE ALL-AMERICAN AMERICAN" JACK SWAGGER We start with Truth and Swagger. Cole rants on Kofi for a bit over their Twitter war. Swagger hits a flying shoulderblock and running Vaderbomb for 1. Truth gets smacked on the heel corner and Dolph tags in. Dolph hits a jumping elbow and does sit-ups. Time to hit the chinlock. Corner charge eats boot and Dolph misses a corner splash. Kofi tags in and is a house of fire. Corner splash misses, but Kofi nails a frog crossbody for 2. A Pier 4 breaks out and Truth gets dumped. Kofi clotheslines Swagger out and knocks Vickie down. Dolph gets a sudden thumb to the eye and finishes with the Zig Zag.
WINNERS: Dolph Ziggler & Jack Swagger - So we're NOT building up Air Truth for the tag titles? Ok, this makes the decision to job the tag champions last night even more baffling.
We take a quick look at Syfy's Face Off.
Your hosts are the three chuckleheads. Later tonight, Big Show faces Mark Henry. We take a look at what happened between them last Friday.
WWE Hall of Fame segment - Not inducting Ron Simmons while WM's in Florida would just be wrong.
Backstage, we hear Eugene's old theme music, as a bunch of red cups are laid out on the table while a Cobra suddenly emerges. Santino's still training...for some reason. Heath Slater enters the picture and pokes fun at Santino. Santino's Cobra sock suddenly squirts water in Slater's face! It's a spitting cobra, you see! Well, thanks for showing up, Heath Slater!
We're shown the Twitter war between CM Punk and Chris Brown. And you know The E is just LOVING this free publicity. Thanks for being such a toolbox, Chris Brown!
Later tonight, it's Champion vs. Champion!
THE GREAT KHALI v. DREW McINTYRE McIntyre gets no entrance, because he's cannon fodder, of course. JUDO CHOP~!, Tree Slam, goodbye in 30 seconds.
WINNER: The Great Khali - Sigh...
Backstage, the demoted Matt Striker talks to The Big Show. Show has Cody Rhodes at the top of his shit list. Show promises bad things for Cody Rhodes.
WWE Rewind - Big Show destroys Mark Henry and Teddy Long's office last Friday
"THE WORLD'S STRONGEST MAN" MARK HENRY v. THE BIG SHOW Announcers note that Mark Henry has been reinstated and the speculation is that it's out of political pressure on Teddy Long.
Show's a house of fire to start. He hits an avalanche and calls for the Mayweather Sucker Punch before Henry knocks him down. Henry works over Show for a bit before Show fights his way back up. Henry knocks him back down with a clothesline. Announcers argue about Long and Laurinaitis for about the millionth time tonight. Yeah, that's not going to get old fast. We only have 6 weeks before Wrestlemania. Henry continues to work over Show very slowly, but talks some good smack. Corner charge eats boot and Show makes the babyface comeback. Spear hits and Show calls for the chokeslam, but Cody Rhodes' music hits and CODY RHODES comes out with a mic. Rhodes taunts Show by reminding him of his match with Akebono at Wrestlemania. That takes us to...
CODY RHODES PRESENTS: ANOTHER EMBARRASSING BIG SHOW WRESTLEMANIA MOMENT: 2005, as Big Show dons a sumo thong and gets beaten by Akebono.
Show turns back around into a bodyslam (called the World's Strongest Slam by Matthews, because he's an idiot) and Henry hits the big fat splash for 2. Henry argues with the referee and turns around to the Mayweather Sucker Punch. But instead of covering, Show opts to chase Rhodes! And...um...no bell, no announcement, but let's call it...
WINNER BY COR: Mark Henry - Would an OFFICIAL DECISION have killed them? At least PRETEND the matches matter, guys!
Your hosts are the three knuckledraggers. They shoot it off to the Raw Rebound.
Later tonight, CM Punk faces Daniel Bryan in Champion vs. Champion madness!
We take a look at "Are You Serious," hosted by The Road Dogg and Josh Matthews, on WWE YouTube.
LILIAN GARCIA brings out TEDDY LONG. Long dances on top of the ramp and brings out EZEKIEL JACKSON.
EZEKIEL JACKSON v. DAVID OTUNGA After how completely awful this match was last night, I'd really rather not watch it a second time, ok? Let's just fast-forward to another clean pin for Otunga.
Post-match, Otunga does some poses that just scream "Wellness Policy."
Let's take another look at Syfy's Face Off.
Later tonight, it's CM Punk facing Daniel Bryan in a Champion vs. Champion match.
Here's a video package on Eve. No! Just...NO!
Your hosts are the three hoe-skis. They pimp out a WWE.com interview with Eve. No...just...NO!
Backstage, the demoted Matt Striker talks to CM Punk. Punk says it's good to be back on SmackDown and endorses Long as GM of both shows. Punk says he'll confront Chris Jericho face-to-face on Monday. Punk then focuses on Bryan, saying he's changed since winning the title. He even tells Bryan that if he has AJ shave her head, he'll sue for copyright infringement. HA! Punk says Bryan knows how to win, but tonight Bryan will learn how to lose.
Ad break - The Rock DVD promo
DANIEL BRYAN v. CM PUNK: CHAMPION v. CHAMPION You know, I would normally complain about how they've given away a Champion vs. Champion for free (and twice in the span of a month), but...it's Daniel Bryan vs. CM Punk, so screw that! Give me THIS! A thousand times THIS! Cole points out the current front-page TMZ story featuring the CM Punk/Chris Brown feud. Booker says Chris Brown will put his hands on you and Cole totally mocks him for it...and for once, I approve of Cole here.
We start with a wrestling sequence. Punk gets a wheelbarrow pin that's quickly reversed for 2. Back to the wrestling sequence that's just going back-and-forth. We get a standoff to a big pop to send us to our next ad break.
We come back with Punk hitting a legdrop for 2. Bryan then snaps Punk's arm and goes to work on him. Corner charge eats boot. Punk's springboard crossbody misses. Bryan works over Punk's arm and hits the armbar. Punk tries to come back, so Bryan hits the Northern Lights and continues to work the arm. Punk tries to come back, but Bryan continues to put him down and work the arm. Punk puts Bryan down with a release backbreaker. Punk makes the comeback with kicks and hits the spinning heel kick. Bryan misses with the kick to the head and Punk nearly gets the GTS. GTS is almost turned into the LeBell Lock, but Punk escapes and nearly nails Bryan with the roundhouse kick to the head. Bryan opts to take a walk, but here's SHEAMUS to toss him back in. Punk nails the roundhouse kick to the head for the pin. Huh...
WINNER: CM Punk - Didn't think they'd put a sudden end to Bryan's winning streak like that.
Oh, but here's SUPER DAVE LAURINAITIS to take umbrage to this. He restarts the match. Why would he do that? Shouldn't he take pride in Raw's champion beating SmackDown's champion? Punk goes back on offense, as Laurinaitis sits at ringside, to take us to our final ad break of the night.
We come back with Bryan working over Punk. We get a pin reversal sequence, but Bryan grabs the ropes and gets the pin!
WINNER: Daniel Bryan - Sigh...we know what comes next...
Yeah, here's TEDDY LONG to restart the match, even though his champion just beat Laurinaitis' champion. This is getting stupid. Punk backdrops Bryan to the outside and hits the suicide dive! Punk comes back in with the springboard clothesline for 2. Punk hitting the corner knee, but the bulldog is countered with an arm wringer slam. Bryan hits the YAAAAAH corner dropkick for 2! Top-rope 'rana hits, but Punk nearly reverses for the pin. Bryan hits Tajiri kicks, but Punk rolls him up for 2, before Bryan tries for the LeBell Lock! That's countered with a catapult and the roundhouse kick to the head gets 2 when Bryan puts his foot on the rope. Punk's slow to get up and gets crotched on the Savage Elbow attempt. Bryan's superplex attempt is blocked, but he remains undaunted and tries again. Punk shoves him off again, but Bryan tries a third time and finally nails the superplex. Bryan pins, but Punk cradles him! Both men's shoulders are down and...we have a double pin.
Punk and Bryan both celebrate, as do both GM's. The argument is just insipid, as both GM's are falling over themselves to claim that their own guy lost. Laurinaitis raises Bryan's hand. Long raises Punk's hand. Long and Laurinaitis take their coats off and toss them at each other's faces. And so our show apparently ends with Long and Laurinaitis staring each other down.
WINNER: No Contest
That's how you fuck up a sure-thing main event, folks.
Question: Shouldn't the Champion vs. Champion have meant more in the Long/Laurinaitis feud than a meaningless Jackson/Otunga match? Shouldn't Laurinaitis and Long have just been happy with their champion winning?
For a Super Smackdown, this show didn't feel very super. And what should have been an awesome main event, while still very good, was completely crippled by utterly ridiculous booking. I'm going to be in the minority on this one, it seems, but I'd have rather seen something like a double countout finish or something.
I don't see how WWE "fucked up" that main event. The match was spectacular. Bryan and Punk got 20 minutes to tear the house down. They did false-finish mania, but what, you expect, nay, demand one of the World Champions to go down cleanly 40 days before WrestleMania? Hell, you got three finishes, one for each champion and one where they both won. The champions delivered an outstanding PPV quality match and set up this One GM to Rule Them All storyline. Plus you had the bizarre scenario of each GM declaring for the other brand's champion because they hate their brand's champion.
No, you want fucking up? Look no further than Lillian Garcia, who must have been so stunned by Big Johnny's fantastic Teddy Long dance she completely bungled his title:
"The General Manager of RAW... Interim... Talent Relations."
"Yo, AJ, I did it!" - Daniel Bryan "This was supposed to be an exhibition!" - Santino
A lot of Rocky references tonight.
Ezekiel was distraught from losing to David Otunga last night, but now he became the first man in history to have two consecutive pinfall losses to David Otunga in two consecutive nights in under five minutes total. I'd put Big Zeke on suicide watch if I were Teddy Long.
“@ZackRyder: @CMPunk She played me bro” I got your back.
Originally posted by John OrquiolaNo, you want fucking up? Look no further than Lillian Garcia, who must have been so stunned by Big Johnny's fantastic Teddy Long dance she completely bungled his title:
"The General Manager of RAW... Interim... Talent Relations."
I completely missed that the first time. I just replayed it right now and Cole just MURDERED her for it. Monday Night Cena looked at that and said "Man, that was harsh!"
How can it be labeled "Air Truth" when Evan "Air" Bourne isn't in the tag team? I vote for JimmyBoom.
Fantastic Main Event. False finishes and GM tomfoolery aside, that was a great wrestling performance. Two vanilla midgets put on a clinic while Deca-Otunga and Musclefat did whatever it was they did. It's frightening to think where Vince would be without someone telling him that maybe Mason Ryan vs. Big Zeke as the Main Event for Wrestlemania would be a terrible idea.
The non-finish of the main event would've been a lot more forgivable had they not done a non-finish in the Big Show vs. Mark Henry match. That's two matches they plugged at the start of the show, both ending without finishes. Just really lazy to me, especially Show vs. Henry, where the announcers didn't even bother to care that no winner was announced. Just bizarre.
EDIT: Oh, and Teddy Long forces Ace and Otunga to use the bathroom as their office for the evening...and we got NO skits of them working in there? I figured that would've made for instant comedy.
(edited by geemoney on 21.2.12 2343) @gregmparks - live Tweeting of Raw and Impact, wrestling thoughts and other slices of life.
I wonder if Booker T is going to get called into Principal McMahon's office over that seemingly innocuous comment about Chris Brown? Saying that Brown will "put hands on you" is just... wow. Talk about a can of worms (which Cole, of all people, thankfully called Booker on), but I could see Vince taking that as Booker not "sticking up for one of our boys." You know how Vince still clings to that jock mentality. I can just imagine Vince dressing Booker down for not telling everyone that Punk would kill Chris Brown if they actually got it on in a parking lot somewhere.
Unless the whole charade is just a work. Which is entirely within the realm of possibility knowing the E and their constant craving for mainstream attention.
I was thinking we were headed for MOTYC with Bryan/Punk and since its early, I am going to throw it out there even with the bullshit finish. I don't watch Smackdown normally, but if all it is one giant commercial for Raw then I guess I am not missing out. So, is Cody going to get Shaq to be his partner or is Show going to team up with Shaq?
Poor big Zeke. I actually thought Booker was making a Rhianna joke more than anything else. Plus, lets all be honest here if there was a fight, you damn well know Brown and his entrouge is going to be packing. Rhianna is a dumb ass by the way. Just making sure we got that base covered. I have no idea where this Chris Brown/Punk thing is going and I hoping nowhere, but with all the mentions of it on Smackdown last night, I am not going to be pleased if it worms its way onto my TV let alone the starting out of the gate 3 star match of Jericho vs. Punk.
(edited by lotjx on 22.2.12 0633) The Wee Baby Sheamus.
Twitter: @realjoecarfley its a bit more toned down there. A bit.
It was a good main event, but it kills me that we never heard the referee's decision. He was right there, I saw him walk over to the ring announcer, and we never heard what he said. Instead, we just kept looking at the two guys whose opinions don't matter. I don't mind the double-fall finish, but at least let the referee tell me what's going on.
Punk again impresses me by using his shoulder to whip Bryan off the ropes in lieu of his injured arm. I liked that match a lot. They genuinely seemed exhausted as the match progressed, adding drama to the moves. Given Punk's workout regimen, I'm sure that's good acting.
"To be the man, you gotta beat demands." -- The Lovely Mrs. Tracker
Nice continuity with Miz? Miz berated Bryan and his abilities all the way through NXT. Miz accusing Sheamus of trying to steal Bryan's spotlight also obviously reeked of hypocrisy. None of this was picked up by the announcers, of course. I doubt it ever will be addressed, since it seemed to only exist to set up the match between Sheamus and Miz.
The main event was excellent. Bryan and Punk are like the Bret and Shawn of this generation. I wonder how long we are going to have to wait until we get the first one on one PPV match between them. Summerslam? Next year's Wrestlemania?
The bout didn't even suffer that much from all the stoppages. That final third of the match had some damn great crowd heat behind it, as did the post-match angle. I hope they resist temptation to present a singles match between Long and Laurinaitis.
Originally posted by superfurryThe main event was excellent. Bryan and Punk are like the Bret and Shawn of this generation. I wonder how long we are going to have to wait until we get the first one on one PPV match between them. Summerslam? Next year's Wrestlemania?
I think you're jumping the gun a bit with the Bret/Shawn comparison. CM Punk's about at that level but Bryan is only just beginning. I don't doubt that Bryan can get to the megastar/WWE backbone level, but he still has a lot of work to do character-wise to cement it.
I was an ROH fan in the early/mid 2000s, so having these guys on top right now in WWE is very cool. It's too bad that Low Ki, Homicide, Samoa Joe, Chris Daniels, and the rest of those early ROH standouts haven't made their way into and/or up the ranks of WWE as well. Imagine a MITB or Chamber match with more of those guys as participants...
Lloyd: When I met Mary, I got that old fashioned romantic feeling, where I'd do anything to bone her. Harry: That's a special feeling.
Originally posted by superfurryNice continuity with Miz? Miz berated Bryan and his abilities all the way through NXT. Miz accusing Sheamus of trying to steal Bryan's spotlight also obviously reeked of hypocrisy. None of this was picked up by the announcers, of course. I doubt it ever will be addressed, since it seemed to only exist to set up the match between Sheamus and Miz.
Miz's duplicitous nature is in keeping with the character. And it allowed Cole to talk up Miz and put down Bryan in the same segment. Yes, this is a heel praising a heel while demeaning another heel, and, yes, this helps NOBODY, but the inclusion of Miz was a nice nod to those who have a memory longer than Funkasaurus's career.
Cole and Booker commented that Miz seemed to be using Bryan's new prominence to make a tag team. Booker noted it was a desperate gesture as Miz was headlining Mania last year and doesn't have a match this year. This is a story they can pursue, but I don't want to see yet another heel with a long losing streak. Drew's already doing that, and Jericho had it right before his last hiatus.
One of the elements of rasslin I enjoy most is the tease of potential stories, and a desperate Miz latching onto someone else's momentum to spur his own has potential. So long as we aren't asked to forget that Miz can break a pinfall after Cena's finisher. He's been portrayed as resilient and crafty; I hope that isn't brushed aside.
"To be the man, you gotta beat demands." -- The Lovely Mrs. Tracker
The only thing that bugged me about the Champion vs Champion match was that they were throwing it away on Smackdown. The non-finish is expected since they're both main eventing WrestleMania in their own respective matches and can't look bad. This match was all about setting up a secondary story and not who the #1 champion is (Punk).
I'd really love to see the REAL Champion vs Champion match at WrestleMania 29 next year.
Nice guy, too. He chatted with me and a friend of mine after the Kobashi ROH show in Philly for about half an hour. He was really cool (and REALLY small), but we couldn't stop marking out over the spot he did from the previous night.