Brock Lesnar def. Matt Hardy (non title) following F5
Torrie Wilson & Brian Kendrick def. Nidia & Jamie Noble following Torrie DDT.
Taijiri & Rey Mysterio def. Team Angle (noon title)
Nathan Jones def. Bill Demott following Big Boot I think
Semi Finals:
Chris Benoit def Rhyno following a backslide
John Cena def. Undertaker following FBI run-in
Other notes:
Piper interviewed Vince in Pipers Pit. Rikishi came down to take issue with Piper over his hitting Snuka with a coconut in days of lore. Sean O'Haire attacked Rikishi from behind allowing Piper to do whack Rikishi with the aforementioned coconut.
Everyones favourite Smackdown jobbers the FBI complained to the police about getting their belongings theived by a ne'er-do-well. As a result Nathan Jones was taken in allowing the FBI to run in unhindered on Taker's match.
Nobody turned in the Benoit/Rhyno match.
Sable provided guest commentary on the Torrie match
"People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid." - Soren Aabye Kierkegaard
Originally posted by dMrRikishi came down to take issue with Piper over his hitting Snuka with a coconut in days of lore. Sean O'Haire attacked Rikishi from behind allowing Piper to do whack Rikishi with the aforementioned coconut.
Called it! You'll have to look on the second page of posts.
"Speaking of which, I still have high hopes for Piper's Pit. I know he's not as great as he used to be on the mic, but he hasn't gotten to be in this element since Morton Downey Jr. and Brother Love. I'm gonna give him a chance and hope he brings the awesome. (Hell, I just hope that Rikishi gets a coconut cracked over his head before the run is over.)"
(edited by OlFuzzyBastard on 9.4.03 0939) "It's just like the story of the grasshopper and the octopus. All year long, the grasshopper kept burying acorns for the winter, while the octopus mooched off his girlfriend and watched TV. But then the winter came, and the grasshopper died, and the octopus ate all his acorns. And also he got a racecar. Is any of this getting through to you?" -----Phillip J. Fry, Futurama
- John Cena vs. Undertaker (Semi-final). Cena cuts another one his promos before the match, basically saying he'll beat Undertaker. Taker almost pins Cena with a chokeslam about halfway through but Cena gets his foot on the ropes. Soon after this, they cut to a commercial. Cena then uses the chain on Taker before going to work on his injured elbow on the outside. Cena tells the ref to count Taker out and continues to keep him out of the ring when he tries to get back in. The ref ends up getting bumped by Taker so Cena goes for the Death Valley Driver but it's countered into the Last Ride. With the ref still out, the FBI comes down and attacks Undertaker. Palumbo hits Taker with a steel chair and they continue to beat him up as Jones isn't here due to being taken out of the building earlier in the night. As the ref comes to, Cena crawls on Undertaker and gets the win and advances to the finals against Chris Benoit next week
I'll have to see how it plays out on TV, but that's not exactly building up Cena strong for a shot at Brock.
Matthew: You would've loved it, David. A week in a foreign country, strange people, strange customs... Dave: Oh, I know what you mean. I've been to Canada.
I really wish the naysayers of Piper would calm down about his "Crappy job in WCW". He wasn't up to par there, neither was Bret. Looking at the spoilers, it seems to me that Piper is BACK baby, and I for one am taping this episode.
I hope the backslide Benoit uses to defeat the Manbeast from Detroit, MI looks cooler than it sounds. I don't want to see Rhyno, from Detroit MI go down that easily, heh.
FBI~! As a Sicilian, I am really enjoying their skits and seeing them come out to destroy people will surely be just as fun, heh. Though I'd rather have Nunzio re-named Little Guido, but that's a personal preference.
"People use freedom of speech to make up for freedom of thought, which they lack." - Kierkegaard
I guess the streak is over and we are going to finally see Nathan Jones in a match. Wow, Torrie didn't job, I'm shocked. No mention of Sable, please let it be that she already wore out her welcome. Since they are wheeling out the old timers, does that mean Jimmy Snuka gets to return next week on SD to defend Rikishi's honor? And, a potential problem if they go Lesnar/Cena at Backlash. They could have a split crowd, with the local boy getting a world title shot.
There is only one man left to save Vince McMahon and the WWF/E. Where have you gone Greg Gagne, a nation turns its lonely eyes to you.
Originally posted by Santa Sangre You just have to read more detailed spoilers.
I tend to prefer just posting the results and any major backstage shennanigans. It saves me fingers from getting tired and also leaves some sort of surprise for the show itself. I figure those who want the whole kitten-kaboodle before Thursday will find it on their own.
And judging by the number of grammar/spelling errors in my original post, elongating them would be ill advised ;)
"People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid." - Soren Aabye Kierkegaard
1- Benoit vs Rhyno The best way to end a match between guys who are friends, both in a sorta push, is a roll up. The quick, easiest way to do it. After that a handshake, hug and all is forgiven.
2- Cena vs Taker Well, Taker would sorta overpower him, so as long as it looks like Cena doesn't get squashed, I can be alright with it. It does say he got him ready for the DVD, so we'll see.
3- Cena vs Brock I am sure Brock will sell big time. And Cena will get offense in.
4- Cena in his hometown. Hmm...I smell a wicked rap coming up where he disses his town. Super heel heat.. That works every time..
Originally posted by BoromirMarkI really wish the naysayers of Piper would calm down about his "Crappy job in WCW". He wasn't up to par there, neither was Bret. Looking at the spoilers, it seems to me that Piper is BACK baby, and I for one am taping this episode.
Perhaps someone finally made Roddy stick to a script for once. The problem with his awful appearances in WCW, his rambling appearances in NWA, and his appearances on tv in general the last few years is he has had no one to edit or guide him. Perhaps with someone to keep him on course he can be better than he has been. But if they let Piper go off without a script/guidance, I guarantee the results will get ugly.
"It is well that war is so terrible, lest we grow too fond of it." - Robert E. Lee
For anyone who thinks that Booker will be going over HHH at Backlash, feel free to PM me about the HHH Challenge.
FBI deserve recognition...umm...so did the J.o.B Squad...hmm...ok, scratch that...hehe. I'm surprised the if the report is true that Rhyno/Benoit didn't get more reception...I'll have to be sure to tune in tommorrow.
I don't know what to think after seeing the spoilers. It kinda sounds a tad lame to me. Maybe it's still the vacuum coming from the void the Kurt left. Yup, that's it, why else is Sable in a shower scene about 5 years too late?
Ringmistress
Old people aren't the solution to current problems. Oh god, is that SABLE?! We miss you already, Kurt!
My prediction: 'Taker beats on his for five minutes and no-sells everything. On the big screen, it shows the FBI backstage kicking Nathan Jones' ass. Undertaker runs backstage to help his buddy, and gets counted out. Cena gets "put over."
More than enough time to at least initiate the direction for the next year of TV.
Right?
So, let's have a look at how Smackdown's doing that: 1. Brock beats Matt
Brock needs to win, sure. But by squashing one of your two most promising heels who is clearly much smaller than him? Hogan beat big monsters against the odds, got over massively. Austin often beat huge guys (e.g. UT, etc) or overcame overwhelming odds, got over hugely. The Rock was, well, himself.
How is Brock being put over? And why isn't Matt heelishly winning where he shouldn't win?
2. Torrie and Spanky beat Nidia and Noble Well, Nidia was too fat, so here we are. Excellent use of two guys who could make hapless muscular faces look like a billion dollars, or in Kendrick's face, play the usual plucky underdog role. See where that got other small guys like TAKA and Spike?
3. Tajiri and Rey beat Team Angle Speaking of small talented guys, here's how not to put over the mini-Angles whilst wasting Rey. Where's his awesome feud with Hardy? It gives TA some good ring time, I'm sure, but Rey could be near the top, considering his ability and general heat. Instead of pointlessly having UT beat him in a face-vs-face match, why not have UT injured last week, and beaten by Cena, and then having Rey putting over Cena big-style over this week in a real match? I guess face-vs-heel is insulting to the fans' intelligence.
4. Jones beat deMott Awesome. Luckily deMott got to squash small guys so Jones could squash him. The evolutionary food chain of disappearing skill and increasing 'attitude' (usually bad) continues. Jones has some heat, mind you. Maybe he ought to do Diesel-like single power moves backing up a face for a while, although that got Batista nowhere. If he has to wrestle, it's over. The fans turned on Steiner, and he's an all-American hero.
5. Benoit beat Rhyno Well, that whole face-heel thing is getting too much heat these days, so let's do the whole complex face-vs-face respect thing instead. What? Nobody cares? Hmm.
Rhyno's pointless as a face right now, plain and simple, especially considering the size and 'threat ratio' of the other faces on SD. Turn him, make him cripple and brutalize people. He really should've been the one mauling UT and sending him to rehab his arm. Compared to the other 'bad attitude' faces (e.g. Steiner, Nathan Jones), Rhyno makes no sense. He can wrestle, so make him wrestle viciously against the good guys. He's probably never going to be a top wrestler, so why not use his heelish streak of viciousness and top-rope piledrivers to ultimately put over guys like Rey, or Lord beware, even guys like Kendrick?
Benoit is Benoit, but as Harley Race said, don't do flying headbutts, for goodness' sake. Of course he's wasted right now, since he's a fairly bland face. Rhyno would work better as a heel, so we need to turn Benoit into the next Bret Hart ASAP, by making him getting unlikely wins in big PPV matches against huge guys. Of course we've already wasted A-Train, but maybe we can get a few miles out of Big Show after all. People want to cheer for Benoit as the guy who overcomes the odds through sheer hard work, but they won't put too much effort into it. Steiner heel turn, then feed him to Benoit. If anyone can carry Steiner, while sucking off Steiner's natural heel charisma, it's Benoit.
6. Cena beats UT by a fluke after FBI interference If UT vetoed the first Lesnar win, what made you think he'd job to CENA?
Michaels reputedly refused to job to Austin before WM14, when UT spoke to him, and threatened a 'whuppin''. Somebody big and mean needs to chat to Mean Mark pretty damn soon. Even Austin jobbed repeatedly and reasonably cleanly to HHH back when HHH meant nothing. Right now, Cena's gotta be the next decent heel, or it's looking grim. If Brock's got to beat him at Backlash, he needs to be built up QUICKLY. This isn't it. Period.
7. Piper-Rikishi-Snuka-coconut Nice blow-off to the McMahon-Hogan feud with WM, guys. 20 years in the making, and 2 weeks later we continue with fat Samoans, angles nobody remembers or cares about, and Piper.
You can only fool a mark with the same trick so many times, and WM was a pretty good try at it, but not putting that match last after promoting it as the big deal, and then not building on it with anything relevant, well... the marks are going home.
Sable was the Superbowl half-time commercial 4-5 years ago. Nobody gives a crap about the commercials from the SB 5 years ago if they're shown on their own, without being sandwiched between something interesting. Cheap rating ploys don't work if you don't build on them; Goldberg's return is showing that very very painfully on Raw. It may briefly pop PPV buyrates for Backlash, but viewers have no reason to watch RAW, either way. The fact that he's being slotted into the RAW 'talk, walk down the aisle, beatdown, pose, catchphrase, hit his music, walk off' schema is making him look dull and samey.
At least Russo, bless his dark heart, had the popemobile for Goldberg to attack. The thought of Rocky in the popemobile, wanting to protect his precious movie star face from the calloused hands of Goldberg is making me laugh as I write this.
But hey, the formula's worked in the past, so it's working again, right?
Oh. Wait. WWE's actually making a loss right now. Oops. Quick, HHH needs Jericho as his sidekick, some catchy evil phrases are needed - and someone for Diesel to jack knife powerbomb. Wonder who Nash's PPV opponent is.
Was it Patterson who said the following.. ?
Diesel: I am the lowest paid champion in WWF history! WWF stooge: You are the lowest drawing champion in WWF history!
With a bit of luck, seven years down the line, the miracle will repeat itself. Apart from the low pay, of course.
You know what though? If The Undertaker, a guy I've watched kick ass and just be plain AWESOME for the past 57 years was beaten cleanly (or even close to cleanly) by a guy with questionable talent stuck in a Vanilla Ice gimmick, I'd throw my shoe at the TV.
Undertaker jobbing is fine, but it's gotta be done right or it'll mean nothing real quick. Like when Lesnar and him had their draw, and then Lesnar dominated most of the rematch.
Rhyno beating the Undertaker I could even take, because Rhyno's shown as a guy with a huge offense (well, running head-first into you or anything near you, but at least he's powerful) and the crowd would be there to back it up. Since Cena can't talk anymore without doing a grade 2 rhyme, him beating anybody to me is like Mabel's run after the King of the Ring a few years back. I just can't take Cena seriously because he's straight out of 1984 cartoons wrestlers.
Tribal Prophet
Wrestling exists in the eternal present. What is, has always been, and when it no longer is, it never was. It has no past and no future, and sometimes even today is in question. - Madame Manga
You know what though? If The Undertaker, a guy I've watched kick ass and just be plain AWESOME for the past 57 years was beaten cleanly (or even close to cleanly) by a guy with questionable talent stuck in a Vanilla Ice gimmick, I'd throw my shoe at the TV.
Undertaker jobbing is fine, but it's gotta be done right or it'll mean nothing real quick
Well, seeing as Cena is in line for a push, and will most likely be facing off w/ Brock for the Title, I don't think it's good business for Cena to look like a joke. Build up Cena strong, so fans buy into him as a threat to Brock. What would you want the fans saying:
"Cena was beaten by Taker, only to get a lucky win. He's got no chance to beat Brock."
-Or-
"Man, Cena beat Taker clean (or as clean as you get). Brock might be in trouble."
Matthew: You would've loved it, David. A week in a foreign country, strange people, strange customs... Dave: Oh, I know what you mean. I've been to Canada.
On the Cena subject (and I am fully prepared to get flamed for this)...
UT isn't going to job clean. It's just not going to happen. I can accept that. And yes, Cena doesn't gain much from this. But I believe that the purpose of this particular match wasn't designed to necessarily show Cena as a credible threat, but to show the FBI as a credible threat.
When you're a heel in the WWE, a win is a win, period. Jericho to this day brags about beating the Rock and Austin in one night, yet neither win was clean. Matt Hardy got a lot of mileage out of his screwy wins over the Undertaker. Cena will too.
Cena faces Benoit next week. THAT match is going to make him a star. Benoit is far more willing to sell to build up a new guy. If Cena hangs with the guy that got a standing O at the Rumble (and not just from smarks), then beats him clean...he'll be ready for Brock in the fans' eyes.
Since this is the only apparent smackdown post left on the first page of the board I just wanted to point out that Cena cut and dry rap to taker last night ended with him saying he did Necrophilia(sp?) Does anybody really want to start that up again after what happened last year? Bad Cena, go back to your dawg house.