Big Show does not accept the chicken, goat, scotch or dirty water as a peace offering and knocks out Khali in a sucker punch.
The Miz and John Morrison have a fun match with Shannon Moore and Jimmy Wang Yang. Some mic picks up Morrison taunting Yang after a shoulder tackle on Moore, saying, "That's why you're a virgin!" Yang responds with "No I"m not, (inaudible) is." Johnathan Coachman continues to be bland on commentary.
Edge and Vicki Guerrero are getting massages as Teddy Long holds towels.
Finley beats Matt Striker with some help from Hornswaggle, who at on point is called Sky Low Low by Striker. After, Finley and Hornswaggle dance and further beat up Striker.
Now an ad for the new Triple H DVD.
Flashback of last week where Michelle McCool won a motorcycle and Nattie Neidhart attacked her. Now Victoria comes out with Neidhart, who is her best friend. A video of Jim "The Anvil" Neidhart is shown and his daughter cuts a bland promo. A lot of the divas look so much alike. At least Victoria has shorter hair. She beats Michelle McCool with a little help from her friend.
Shawn Michaels and Batista are in the ring talking to each other about him retiring Ric Flair again. Batista doesn't like how Shawn rose to the top; Shawn says he's not big as Batista and took shortcuts due to his size. He tries to superkick Batista but falls short and is able to slip away out of Batista's grip before retreating up the ramp.
Vladimir Kozlov has no music or video and has a squash against Matt Logan.
Now Edge and Vicki have mud masks and cucumbers on their eyes but they could easily have been bananas. Teddy Long brings them cocktails. Edge has red toenail polish on and so does his gal.
MVP is out to help commentate on the Matt Hardy-Chuck Palumbo Match. Matt Hardy gets the win and MVP leaves without incident.
Eve talks to Jesse while Festus stands silently behind them. Jesse is not thrilled about Festus wrestling the undertaker because Festus may not be ready.
While Undertaker waits in the ring, Edge and Vicki spray whipped cream all over each other in bed. Teddy Long doesn't like it and leaves the room.
Festus comes to the ring led by Jesse. Years ago, Undertaker did some work with Jesse's dad, Terry Gordy. Anyway, Festus transforms at the side of the bell, but the Undertaker gets the first offense. Man, I love Festus. They go back and forth for a few minutes before the referee is knocked out and to the outside. Of course this is when the triangle choke is applied and a new ref comes down and calls for the bell. Festus never tapped out because he doesn't know to do that.
Not a bad show. I'm glad Shawn Michaels is here and would like to see him stay after the feud with Batista.
The most underrated part of that main event is Jesse. I mean, Jesse was ready to get his ass filleted by Taker if necessary to protect Festus. Pretty awesome cementing of character, and that's something that has rarely been seen in 2000s WWE.
Jesse and Festus are like the country version of X-Pac and Kane. That's a good thing.
I never spent more time on WWE.COM than during the last housecleaning day. Even though it's never nice to see someone lose their job... ANd as for Test: Good luck in the future. I liked you in ECW. Kind of.