Here are the results from tonight's Velocity and Smackdown tapings in Worcester, MA ...
Velocity/Dark Matches: - Axl Rotten & Balls Mahoney defeated The Shane Twins.
- Simon Dean (yep, not Nova, Simon Dean) defeated Mike Kruel.
- Frankie Kazarian defeated Nunzio with a Perfectplex.
- Muhammad Hassan cut a promo.
- Chris Benoit defeated William Regal with the Crippler Crossface. Allegedly a great match.
These may be out of order, I apologize in advance.
- Eddie Guerrero teased revealing Rey Mysterio's secret, but ends up in a confrontation with Hardcore Holly.
- Super Crazy, Psicosis & Juventud defeated Paul London, Scotty 2 Hotty, and Funaki in a six-man.
- MNM beat up on Heidenreich until, get this ... ROAD WARRIOR ANIMAL makes the save.
- Eddie Guerrero defeats Hardcore Holly with a Lasso From El Paso after hitting Holly in the leg with a pipe.
- Christian beat up Booker T before they could have a match, ramming him into the steps over and over. He then made the ref count a pin anyway.
- They do a bit where a lawyer, representing Muhammad Hassan, says Hassan won't be on TV until he beats Undertaker at the Great American Bash. Taker comes out to a monster pop and destroys him.
- JBL ranted and raved about being a better champion than Batista, promised to take the belt at the Bash, and so on.
- Batista defeated Orlando Jordan (no titles on the line). After the match, JBL laid out Batista and stood over him with the belt.
- Triple H came out and joined JBL in beating on Batista until John Cena came out for the dark match main event, which ended with Cena pinning JBL.
Announced for the Great American Bash: - Melina vs. Torrie in a Bra & Panties match. - MNM defending the tag titles against Heidenreich & Road Warrior Animal. - Christian vs. Booker T. - Orlando Jordan defending the U.S. Title against Chris Benoit. - Undertaker vs. Muhammad Hassan. - World Champion Batista vs. JBL.
Credit: "Rick" and PWInsider.com
I'll say it again, the Dudleyz vs MNM would have made some money.
"To be the man, you gotta beat demands." -- The Lovely Mrs. Tracker
Originally posted by PWInsider.comHeidenreich was coming out to the ring for a match and was attacked from behind by MNM. While they were double teaming him, Road Warrior Animal's music and entrance video hit and he cleaned house. MNM ran into the crowd and Mercury challenged the Road Warriors to a tag team title match at Great American Bash. Nitro interrupted and said they couldn't because Hawk was dead. Instead, Animal offered to let Heidenreich be his friend at the Bash and the match was made while the crowd was disgusted by the remark about Hawk.
God, I thought the bWo had at least a few weeks of good TV in them. Great, now I'm back to having to worry about Stevie Richards' job.
They fired guys like Akio and Billy Kidman so Paul London could team up with Scotty 2 Hotty and Funaki? What the hell?
Animal & Heidenreich teaming up, eh? That is just about the absolute scariest fuckin' thing I could imagine. It could make for a comedically bad mach at GAB, though~!
Overall, the Great American Bash card is not appealing to me at all. Booker T v. Christian will probably be pretty good and Eddie v. Rey (if they do it) should be tremendous, but the rest of the card looks quite terrible. Maybe that'll be a goal every year for WWE? To make each year's Great American Bash worse than the last? It's a WCW entity, that's all I say.
Oh, just for some positives: I love the Mexicools (I just wish they had better opponents than Scotty 2 Hotty) and I'm looking forward to Frankie Kazarian.
The answer to WWE's financial problems...
Never 'Wiener of the Day', and is actually quite bitter about it.
As someone who will be attending GAB live and is a HUGE Road Warriors mark.....just hearing the music will get a pop out of me...but Heidenreich? If he comes out with full LOD garb, I will puke (no pun intended) :)
1. As most people will probably end up saying: the answer is probably going off steroids. Virgil obviously didn't work out any less, but just didn't gain that extra mass and bulk that steroids maintain. 2.