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The W - Pro Wrestling - SmackDown #626 8-19-11
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It's False
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Since: 20.6.02
From: I am the Tag Team Champions!

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#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.16
TONIGHT! It's the post-SummerSlam show and with the emphatic ending to last Sunday's Orton/Christian match, it's safe to say that this feud has ended. OR HAS IT? Plus, Mark Henry's reign of terror continues tonight. SmackDown is NOW!

The Champ is NOT Here, as we see clips of Randy Orton regaining the World Heavyweight Championship.

No opening credits, as we go straight to the ring at the tail end of Teddy Long's music. Teddy Long greets us in the ring. He introduces Randy Orton, who comes out to a decent ovation. Your hosts are the three nimrods, who praise Orton for Sunday's performance. Orton takes the mic and it's promo time!

Orton: Now I know everyone's USED to seeing SmackDown start with CHRISTIAN standing in this ring, whining, begging, and complaining for that one more match. But I sure as hell am no Christian. My name...is Randy Orton...and I am the World Heavyweight Champion. Now at our match at SummerSlam, I beat Christian, so badly, so BRUTALLY...that he can't even stand, let alone show up here tonight to beg me for one more match. At first, I respected Christian. Shortly after that, he began to annoy and eventually, I began to despise with every fiber of my being. And now...it's all over. So Teddy, Teddy, come here, man, I don't want to talk about lawyers, lawsuits, contracts, like everyone in this arena and everyone in the entire world, I am ready to start anew.

Long: Well, Randy, I'm glad you brought that up, because I can tell you right now who you're going to be moving on to. And that is going to be the winner of tonight's main event: A 20-man over-the-top-rope battle royale! And Randy...

Interruption comes from Cody Rhodes, of all people. He brings Ted DiBiase along with him and grabd his own mic.

Cody: Lookie lookie, Teddy Long, you know what this is. It's the Legacy reunited in the ring. Randy, you remember the Legacy, right? It was the group you used to have on Monday Night Raw with Ted, myself, where we were basically considered lesser sons of a greater sire, but...how times have changed. Because like you, I am a champion, too. But unlike Randy Orton, I didn't have to resort to common barbarism to attain my title and please the masses. I think we all know I genuinely could care less about any of these hideous people. Randy...you know me. You know I'm not happy just being Intercontinental Champion, which is why I'm going to compete in the 20-man battle royale. Because I want what you have and sooner than later, I am going to take that title. Ted, Ted, you have a voice. Use it.

Ted: Calm down, calm down. Randy, we know you better than anyone else in the WWE. We know your strengths. But most importantly, we know your weaknesses. But don't think for one second that we forgot about all those times that you used us...

Orton (like the rest of us) thinks that DiBiase's promo sucks, so he puts an abrupt end to it with an RKO. Cody escapes slowly, so hit Orton's music! Well, that was a nice segment to start...wait, no, it isn't over, because Cody's got the mic again and he doesn't look happy with Teddy Long.

Cody: This is your show! I'm assuming you're going to do something about that? YOU KNOW WHAT? You know what this means? I DEMAND that you do something about it!

Long: Alright, I tell you what. I'm going to do something about it. I'm going to march right back there and I'm going to have Randy Orton stand in a corner on one leg for ten minutes. And I'm also going to demand that Randy Orton take out pen and paper and write 100 times "I will not RKO Ted DiBiase." You happy? But in the meantime, I am going to demand something of YOU, alright? Now since Ted DiBiase is unable to compete, I'm going to demand that YOU take his place. Now the Intercontinental Championship will be on the line and your opponent will be the FORMER Intercontinental Champion, Ezekiel Jackson! And one more thing, that match is going to be next! Holla!

Hit Teddy Long's music! That'll take us to our first...

Ad break - Ad for a Super SmackDown LIVE on Tuesday, August 30. Aw crap, I'm recapping early that week, aren't I?

CODY RHODES v. EZEKIEL JACKSON: INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
We start with Jackson asserting the power advantage in the corner. Corner whip and airplane side slam gets 2. Jackson grabs a leg and dodges the enziguiri before dropping an elbow for 2. Jackson telegraphs the backdrop, allowing Cody to hit the sliding Goldust uppercut. Cody tries to follow up, but gets backdropped for 2. Jackson tries to chase Cody, but gets hung up on the top rope. Cody hits a bulldog for 2. Rhodes kicks away in the corner. Jackson tries to fight him off, but Cody takes him down for 2. Jackson powers Rhodes into the corner and starts hammering away. Cody dodges the bodyslam and exits. So Jackson follows him and chucks him over the steel steps. Cody kicks the steps into Zeke's knee to stop his onslaught. Back in the ring, Cody nearly walks into the Torture Rack, but Cody floats over and takes the knee down. Beautiful Disaster and Cross-Rhodes follow for the sudden clean pin at 3 and a half minutes.

WINNER: Cody Rhodes - Yeah, that should emphatically put an end to the Ezekiel Jackson experiment and caps off about a month's worth of jobbing. That finish just came out of nowhere.

Later tonight, a 20-man battle royale with cheese! Dig that smiling Sheamus in the corner!

Ad break - WWE Shopzone ad

Backstage, Zack Ryder joins Teddy Long. He says Alberto Del Rio will be here any minute. Long doesn't know what Ryder's talking about, but Ryder notes that Del Rio was invited. Long said he thought he was inviting John Cena or CM Punk, but Ryder says that surprises happen. Suddenly Aksana comes into the picture and...yeah, I'm done here.

Your hosts are the three nimrods. Booker says "Shucky Ducky!" as he veers dangerously into Stevie Ray territory. Let's take another look at Justin Gabriel in South Africa. AGAIN? Haven't we had three weeks of this already? Good for him and all, but enough already!

Oh wait, it's leading into an actual MATCH? Ok, I take that back, because Justin Gabriel makes his entrance for the next match. He comes out to some pretty cool new music. The match is next.

Ad break - Raw promo

JUSTIN GABRIEL v. TYSON KIDD
Tyson Kidd actually gets his whole entrance, so good for him! He's been on this show a lot lately. Sure, he's been 0-for-everything, but I'll take what I can get.

Wrestling sequence starts us off, which Kidd wins. Gabriel gets a legsweep off an armdrag and gets an armbar. Kidd drives Gabriel into the corner and chokes away. He follows with a snapmare and dropkick for 2. Kidd hits a back elbow for 2 and hits the keylock. Kidd goes for a back suplex and Gabriel lands on his feet. Gabriel misses the spin kick, but hits the enziguiri and both men are down. Gabriel hits a series of kicks and hits another spin kick off a whip. Roaring elbow gets 2! Corner whip is reversed, but Kidd's corner charge misses. Gabriel hits a springboard crossbody, but Kidd rolls over and goes for the Canadian Maple Leaf single crab before Gabriel rolls him up for 2. Gabriel hits the inverted Russian legsweep and climbs the ropes. Kidd catches him, but gets tossed off, anyway. Gabriel finishes with the Sternum-Crushing 450 Splash at 4 minutes and change.

WINNER: Justin Gabriel - Too short. I don't think these two gelled too well, but I think a rematch could fix that.

Backstage, the demoted Matt Striker talks to Jinder Mahal and The Great Khali. Striker asks Mahal what their chances are of winning, so Khali talks loud and says nothing...that I can understand. Mahal translates that Khali says that he'll win the battle royale, but Mahal sets him straight and assures everyone that Khali will help HIM win the battle royale tonight.

Coming up next, Alberto Del Rio returns to SmackDown.

Ad break

Tony Chimel brings in Ricardo Rodriguez to introduce Alberto Del Rio. This week, Alberto Del Rio joins us in a Silver Lamborghini Gallorado. ADR takes the mic and it's promo time!

ADR: My name...my name is Alberto...Del Rio...the undisputed WWE Champion. But, of course, my friends, you already know that. You also know that I've been talking about destiny for months. And even that you thought I was crazy, which I'm not, I'm here standing in front of you...just to show you, just to prove you, that destiny...destiny is real! I cash my Money in the Bank last Sunday at SummerSlam to become YOUR undisputed WWE Champion. And I'm saying YOUR champion, because you know what Bakersfield represents for Alberto Del Rio! One year ago, I did my debut in this very same place! I did my debut defeating Rey Mysterio. Yes, I still remember that that night, all of you hated me. But it's incredible how things change in just one year. Look now, now all of you just love Alberto Del Rio. But my friends, it's funny because like I said, a year ago I defeat Rey Mysterio, and a year after, for my first title defense, I did the same thing! I defeat Rey Mysterio! And if you don't believe me! I'm gonna show you what I did last Monday on Raw.

Let's take a look at Del Rio beating Rey Mysterio last Monday. We then see Del Rio dish out the post-match punishment.

ADR: I am...a real champion. That's the reason I'm here. That's the reason I'm here. Because that's what a real champion do. He face anyone! Who wants to face El Patrón? Who wants to face "El Patrón" Alberto Del Rio? Who is man enough to face ME? Señores...

Interruption comes from Daniel Bryan, who has a mic of his own.

ADR: You? You? Are you kidding me? You want another beatdown, perro?

Bryan: Alberto, you think you are SOOOO special. Let me ask you a question. If you're so special, how come you cashed in YOUR Money in the Bank just like everybody else? Because when the champion was beaten down and broken and all you had to do was pick the bones. Let me tell you, that is NOT special, that is ordinary, that is predictable, and THAT is pathetic!

We have a match, by the looks of it and it's next.

Ad break

ALBERTO DEL RIO v. DANIEL BRYAN: NON-TITLE MATCH
We start with the lock-up. Bryan starts working over Del Rio in the corner. Bryan wants a kick, so Del Rio ducks out. Del Rio suckers Bryan into a soccer kick and stomps away.

Memo to the announcers: Normally, you should talk about what a dick move it is to cash in the briefcase on a downed champion to get your heel OVER as a heel! Going out of your way to say that it's perfectly fine to do what he did does NOT get your heel over!

Idiots.

Del Rio whips Bryan into the corner for 2 and hits the armbar. Bryan tries to fight it off, but eats a headbutt. Soccer kick gets 1. Del Rio gets a headlock takeover and holds the headlock. ADR hits the shoulderblock, but runs into a knee. Bryan hits kicks for 2. TALK ABOUT THE MATCH, YOU DIPSHITS! GODDAMMIT! Del Rio reverses a corner whip, but runs into an elbow. Del Rio catches Bryan climbing the ropes and hits a second-rope armbreaker for 2! ADR continues to work over the arm and hits the armbar again. Bryan goes for a sunset flip, but ADR drops an elbow on his arm. ADR hits the hammerlock and...seriously, the commentary is rapidly turning into nails on the chalkboard. We're hitting a 9 on the Madden Scale and climbing fast. Corner whip is reversed and Del Rio drops the leg for 2. Back to the armbar and, psychology or not, this is stating to get boring. Del Rio stomps on the arm and gets 2 and HOLY SHIT, SHUT THE FUCK UP, COLE! Bryan makes the babyface comeback. Bryan backdrops a charging Del Rio over the top rope. Bryan comes off the apron with the knee to the face. Bryan climbs the turnbuckles. Knowing Del Rio sees the dropkick coming, he jumps over him, but falls prey to the German suplex for 2. Del Rio puts Bryan on the top rope. Blockbuster suplex is countered, as Bryan falls on top of him to take us to our next ad break.

We come back with Bryan and ADR trading blows. Bryan hits the YAAAH corner dropkick! Bryan hits the top-rope seated dropkick for 2. Bryan hits the Tajiri kicks, but misses the roundhouse. He's able to counter the Del Rio back suplex and counter his corner charge. Bryan runs into a tilt-a-whirl, but gets the choke sleeper! Del Rio counters it by shoving Bryan into the corner. ADR gets the Northern Lights suplex and fluidly switches into the jujigatime for the submission at 16 minutes!

WINNER: Alberto Del Rio - That was a good match with an AWESOME finishing sequence! And once again, a great match is utterly ruined by the World's Shittiest Announce Team! If a meteor struck these three clowns, I wouldn't shed a tear.

Post-match, Del Rio slaps on the jujigatime for some post-match punishment. Sin Cara, of all people, makes the save! He takes Del Rio out with a top-rope plancha. Hit Sin Cara's music!

Backstage, the demoted Matt Striker talks to Mark Henry. Matt Striker shoots it off to the "graphic" images, as Henry drives Sheamus through the barricade in what was an AWESOME display! Henry says he should already be the #1 contender, so he feels disrespected. Henry says everyone will sink.

Ad break - Super Smackdown is coming August 30th! It's Super Cereal!

AJ & KELLY KELLY v. NATALYA & ALICIA FOX
I don't know whether to smack my forehead for not having The Divas of Doom tagging tonight or credit them for remembering that Beth isn't on this show. Of course, when has show consistency ever mattered?

We start with AJ and Natalya. AJ wants a headlock takeover, but can't overpower Natalya. Natty gets the double choke and powers AJ into the corner. AJ tries a second-rope crossbody and gets caught. Natalya just toys with AJ, not giving her anything. Tag is made and Fox works over AJ before hitting the chinlock. Tag is made and Natty toys with AJ some more. Fox gets the tag and chokes away in the heel corner. AJ fights her away out and makes the hot tag. Kelly hits the THESZ PRESS and the deadly SPANK TO THE ASS! AAAAAAAAH swinging headscissors hits! Kelly drives Fox into the corner. My bum is on your lips! My bum is on your lips! Did Matthews seriously call that move "effective" with a straight face? Somebody shoot me. Kelly gets a 'rana for 2. Pier 4 breaks out! Fox misses with the Ask Kick and Kelly finishes with the K2 for the pin.

WINNER: Kelly Kelly & AJ - AJ is the Divas' answer to Ricky Morton. And that's pretty much all I have to say about this match.

Post-match, the heel team falls apart and Natty attacks Fox to a face pop. Sharpshooter! To Fox's credit, she doesn't tap out. Natty leaves Fox laying.

Coming up next, it's a 20-man battle royale!

Ad break - The Decade's Best DVD promo

Here's a look at SummerSlam Fan Axxess

Randy Orton comes out to observe the main event's proceedings. That'll take us to our next...

Ad break

20-MAN BATTLE ROYALE
Your participants are The Great Khali, Jinder Mahal, Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase, Zack Ryder, Jimmy & Jey Uso, Heath Slater, Justin Gabriel, Ezekiel Jackson, Yoshi Tatsu, William Regal, Johnny Curtis, Trent Barreta, Tyson Kidd, Sin Cara, Wade Barrett, Mark Henry, and Sheamus. And unless Christian's walking through that door, it's pretty obvious who's winning here. Hint: It's not one of the many guys that didn't get an entrance.

Matthews: And Sheamus makes 20.

Wait...no...I count 19. I only see 19. Seriously? Can they not COUNT? There are only 19 guys! Why are there only 19 guys? I would imagine that Daniel Bryan was supposed to be #20, but would it seriously KILL THEM to acknowledge that Del Rio knocked him out? Or mention his name AT ALL?

Everyone IMMEDIATELY gangs up on Mark Henry, knowing he's the heavy, HEAVY favorite! Henry throws EVERYONE off! He throws out Trent Barreta first, because...well...it's Trent Barreta. What did you expect? Yoshi Tatsu's next on the jobber pecking order, so he goes bye-bye. Barrett takes out Johnny Curtis. Jinder Mahal's hiding behind Khali. Everyone meanders around for a bit. Say goodbye to Zack Ryder. Jackson nearly tosses Cody, but he skins the cat to save himself...until Jackson clotheslines him over. Jackson tries to get through Khali to get to Mahal. He hits the Indian contingent with the corner lariat, but a second one is met with a JUDO CHOP~! By the way, if this idea is somehow leading into a Jackson/Khali match in the future, the universe may collapse into a Black Hole of Suck. Khali easily tosses Jackson. Now Mark Henry's sizing up the Indian faction. Henry piefaces Khali, so Khali takes him down with the JUDO CHOP~! Khali wants the tree slam, but Henry scoops up Khali and tosses him over to some sizable heel heat. Sensing trouble, Mahal gets himself into the match. Slater jumps on Sheamus' back like a dope and gets dropped onto the apron. Brogue Kick will end his night. Henry dumps Slater onto the steel steps for fun. That takes us into our final ad break of the night.

We come back with everyone ganging up on Sheamus, who manages to survive. Mark Henry's stalking on the outside, having gone under the bottom rope. Announcers note that William Regal was eliminated during the ad break. Sin Cara takes out Justin Gabriel with a crossbody, while skinning the cat himself. Henry takes Gabriel and tosses him over the barricade, because...why not? Both Usos are out, so Henry beats the crap out of them, too. Henry takes Jimmy Uso and TOSSES HIM ONTO THE ANNOUNCE TEAM! I LOVE MARK HENRY! HE IS MY NEW FAVORITE WRESTLER! Excuse me, I need to watch this clip on a loop for a few minutes.

....

....

Ok, I'm back. WHAT? It's SATURDAY? Good lord, I was watching that clip for a while, wasn't I? Ok, then, back to this match.

Henry comes back into the ring and throws out Jinder Mahal. DiBiase jumps on Henry's back like a moron and gets thrown out. Sin Cara takes out Tyson Kidd, who lasted a lot longer than I thought he would. We're down to Sheamus, Wade Barrett, Sin Cara, and Mark Henry. Everyone gangs up on Henry, with Sheamus and Barrett stomping him down in the corner. Barrett wipes out Sheamus with a lariat to put an end to that comradery. Sheamus brings Barrett out onto the apron and both men exchange blows for some good old-fashioned English/Irish violence! Sheamus wins the exchange and eliminates Barrett. Sin Cara tries to take advantage, but goes through the middle ropes. Sheamus nearly eliminates Sin Cara, but can't quite do it. Sheamus gets a tilt-a-whirl and hangs SC on the ropes. Sheamus then makes the big babyface mistake of calling out for the Brogue Kick, because he totally forgot about Mark Henry. And Henry simply scoops up Sheamus and tosses him out. Sin Cara catches Henry unaware with a top-rope crossbody, but at this point, it's just a formality. And sure enough, Henry catches a crossbody and hits the World's Strongest Slam before dumping Sin Cara to become #1 contender.

WINNER: Mark Henry - Gotta love that everyone came up with the idea of ganging up on Mark Henry, only to IMMEDIATELY abandon that plan! LOGIC!

Post-match, we get the champion/challenger staredown to end the show.

FINAL THOUGHT

This was a cooldown show and it showed. Not too much in the way of wrestling, with the bulk of the show taken up by promos and the battle royale.

The ADR/Bryan match was well worth the price of admission, shitty commentary aside. So I guess that's enough for a thumbs up this week.

Right now, the big elephant in the room is Christian. The plan is obviously for Orton to finally move on to Mark Henry and pay Henry's angle off, but Christian's still owed a rematch. I'm going to assume that this will be settled by...punt to the head.

Until next week!

(edited by It's False on 21.8.11 1351)


"I brought SCIENCE!"
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Matt Tracker
Scrapple








Since: 8.5.03
From: North Carolina

Since last post: 2 days
Last activity: 4 hours
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.93
I thought this show was solid.

Cody stepped up and got the good pin on Zeke after a moody promo on Randy. I am so glad to see Cody move up and perform to the level of his push.

Bryan and Del Rio WENT TO TOWN. That's two consecutive strong TV matches from Alberto. He may be deadweight on the mic, but he can get in there with strong workers. But, again, Cole went overboard and tainted the experience.

AJ is unbelievably adorable. She doesn't have the definition of some other divas nor the, um, accoutrements. And that works for her. She's distinctive, and that catches my eye.

Gabriel and Kidd was Perfectly Acceptable Wrestling. I'm glad to see Kidd in a somewhat prominent role.

Mark Henry is the company's biggest strongman, and I think it was a mistake to bring out Sheamus so quickly. Give him a week or so off.

I got my money's worth with this episode.



"To be the man, you gotta beat demands." -- The Lovely Mrs. Tracker
John Orquiola
Scrapple








Since: 28.2.02
From: Boston

Since last post: 25 days
Last activity: 25 days
#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.10
"Since Ted DiBiase is unable to compete..."

He. Took. One. RKO.



@BackoftheHead

www.backofthehead.com
hansen9j
Andouille








Since: 7.11.02
From: Riderville, SK

Since last post: 8 days
Last activity: 1 hour
#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.59
    Originally posted by John Orquiola
    "Since Ted DiBiase is unable to compete..."

    He. Took. One. RKO.
He was unable to compete in a match that was starting immediately; he was still able to be in the battle royal.



The Big Bossman raised the briefcase.

Go Pack Go! (Champs!)
Let's Go Riders! (1-7, first in peace, first in war, last in the Canadian Football League)
JustinShapiro
Scrapple
Moderator








Since: 12.12.01
From: Pittsburgh, PA

Since last post: 1 day
Last activity: 1 hour
#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 9.21
    Originally posted by It's False
    WINNER: Justin Gabriel - Too short. I don't think these two gelled too well, but I think a rematch could fix that.


Watch the prematch on NXT. It was spectacular.


    Right now, the big elephant in the room is Christian. The plan is obviously for Orton to finally move on to Mark Henry and pay Henry's angle off, but Christian's still owed a rematch. I'm going to assume that this will be settled by...punt to the head.


My guess is that Christian is held off this month and then returns to attack Randy with malice after the PPV cycle to set up his final rematch in HIAC. It breaks up the Christian/Orton monotony but still puts the guy who can work in the HIAC.
Matt Tracker
Scrapple








Since: 8.5.03
From: North Carolina

Since last post: 2 days
Last activity: 4 hours
#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.93
    Originally posted by John Orquiola
    "Since Ted DiBiase is unable to compete..."


No, just speaking generally. Dibiase is unable to compete. Every day.



"To be the man, you gotta beat demands." -- The Lovely Mrs. Tracker
J. Kyle
Boudin blanc








Since: 21.2.02
From: The Land of Aloha

Since last post: 20 days
Last activity: 13 hours
AIM:  
Y!:
#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.52
Nous ne nous pouvons pas sortir.
    Originally posted by It's False
    Sin Cara, of all people, makes the save!
SC and DB have been BFF since saving each other from Cody & Ted on a weekly basis.

But what happens when (if?) White/Gold Sin Cara returns to confront his imposter? Mistico v. Mystico! Mistico v. Hunico!

And poor Daniel Bryan caught in between in a bromance triangle.



John Orquiola
Scrapple








Since: 28.2.02
From: Boston

Since last post: 25 days
Last activity: 25 days
#8 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.10
Sin Cara got quite the high-pitched Cena-esque chants during the battle royal. If I ever go to a Smackdown show again, maybe I'll poll the kids in the crowd: "Who's your favorite Sin Cara?" Confuse the hell out of them.



@BackoftheHead

www.backofthehead.com
J. Kyle
Boudin blanc








Since: 21.2.02
From: The Land of Aloha

Since last post: 20 days
Last activity: 13 hours
AIM:  
Y!:
#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.52
Nous ne nous pouvons pas sortir.
John Orquiola: Hey Little Jimmy, did you know there are two Sin Caras and zero Santa Clauses?



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That was funny, it would've been better if... C) I ain't a white boy, ain't a boy at all I'd pick that, LOL. Ringmistress
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