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The W - Pro Wrestling - SmackDown #620 7-8-11
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It's False
Scrapple








Since: 20.6.02
From: I am the Tag Team Champions!

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#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.83
TONIGHT! We start the build for Randy Orton/Christian at MitB...I think. There's that whole thing where Sheamus tore up the contract and all. We also start the build for SD's MitB match, so I'm sure we'll get plenty of match combinations! SmackDown is NOW!

WWE - The Champ is Here!

Let's start with a video package on what happened last week between Randy Orton and Christian, culminating with Sheamus taking out both guys and tearing up their contract. Logically, this SHOULD lead into a Triple Threat for the PPV, but somebody thought it'd be a better idea to sign Sheamus up for the MitB match.

Opening credits - Do You Know Your Enemy? They're a little rearranged to reflect the disassembling of The Corre. It's really funny to see how much the credits still feature The Undertaker, even though he probably isn't coming back at all until next year and hasn't even been mentioned since the Wrestlemania cooldown. Anyway, opening pyro! We are taped from Tuscon, AZ! Michael Cole welcomes us in, because Josh Matthews is in the ring with the MitB match participants...minus one notable omission.

Josh: Welcome, everyone, to SmackDown! Now all of the Superstars standing in this ring will be competing in SmackDown's Money in the Bank Ladder Match! Keep in mind every Superstar that has ever cashed in the Money in the Bank contract has gone on to become champion. These Superstars will attempt to climb the ladder and secure that briefcase that will be hanging high above the ring. Inside that briefcase is a contract for a guaranteed World Heavyweight Championship match that can be cashed in at any time, at any WWE event, valid for one year. Daniel Bryan, I'd like to start with you. What are your thoughts on competing in your very first Money in the Bank Ladder Match?

Bryan: Well, Josh, I've got to admit, I'm both excited and a little bit nervous. Because I've dreamed of being World Heavyweight Champion ever since I was a little kid. And this opportunity is worth every single risk that I'm going to take. And now, I may be an underdog in this...

Cody Rhodes takes the mic from Matthews and decides to continue along himself.

Cody: That's because Daniel Bryan is a common man, unable of exceptional things that exception people do. I am one of those exceptional people. I overcame grave personal tragedy, pain, so I climb the ladder, I grab the briefcase, I'm no longer WWE's blind spot. I'll be your World Heavyweight Champion. And then you'll all have to do what you fear the most and that's swallow your damn pride and look me in the eye!

Josh: Ok, thank you, Cody. Moving on now, Wade Barrett, you're also competing in your very first Money in the Bank Ladder Match. How are you feeling?

Wade: I'll be honest with you, Josh. I'm sick and I'm tired of having to listen to what everybody else is going to do. Because let's face it, the achievements of these men in the last 12 months pale in comparison to what I, myself, have achieved. Let me just remind you. First of all, I won NXT season one! Then, I went on to spearhead a revolutionary group of soldiers to...

Oops, here comes Sheamus spriting down to the ring with a chair! He nails Bryan in the gut first! He swings for Cody and misses! He nails Slater in the gut! Gabriel tries to move in, then thinks better of it and bails! Barrett tries to attack from behind, but Sheamus wipes him out with the chair! Sin Cara's sitting on the top rope and he dives over Sheamus and...bails out. Well, can't fault him for intelligence. With only Barrett remaining, Sheamus pounds him in the back with the chair to send him on his way. There are bodies everywhere and Sheamus is the only one left in the ring. I guess it's promo time!

Sheamus: Let me tell you what's really gonna happen at Money in the Bank! I'm gonna win the Money in the Bank Ladder Match! And then when Orton beats that scrawny, malnourished, googly-eyed, homely weasel Christian for the 50th time...on that same night, I'm gonna cash in my Money in the Bank contract and, Orton, I walk out the new World Heavyweight Champion! But as far as Orton goes tonight, I'm coming for you, fella! I wanna get you, I wanna hit you so hard, I'll knock the voices out of your head! Why? Because of this!

Let's take a look at what happened last month when Orton wiped out Sheamus with the Punt of Plot Convenience that conveniently meant the E wouldn't have to book Sheamus for the PPV.

Sheamus: The biggest regret of Randy Orton's career so far, is that he didn't kick me in the head hard enough. Because now, I'm back.

Interruption comes from Christian, who comes up to the ramp with a mic for rebuttal.

Christian: So let me get this straight, Sheamus. You, along with the rest of these clueless morons, thinks that I can't beat Randy Orton at Money in the Bank. Is that what I'm led to believe? But I couldn't really hear you in the back, Sheamus, what was it that you called me? What did you call me?

Sheamus: I called you a scrawny, malnourished, googly-eyed, homely weasel. So what are you gonna do about it, fella?

Christian: Well, I guess there's not much I really can do about it, Sheamus. Other than say this, I'm the same scrawny, malnourished, googly-eyed, homely weasel that beat you a few weeks ago, right before Randy Orton punted you in the head. And I'm also your brand new World Heavyweight Champion after Money in the Bank. But Sheamus, I wanted to come out here and I wanted to say thank you, because you're going to be a big part of that. You are! Because last week, you came out and you tore up the contract, you ripped it up into little pieces and left it in the ring, and because of that, my legal team...they went over the contract again and they had another little stipulation added in there that says that if Randy Orton gets disqualified or if there's another case of bad officiating, I automatically become the World Heavyweight Champion. But Sheamus, I mean, you're such a smart guy, you're so smart, I'm sure you would have had that added into your contract too, right? You're so smart? Oh, I forgot, that's right, fella? You're only good at fightin', aren't ya? Let me ask you a question, Ronald McDonald. Do you even know how to READ a contract?

Sheamus answers this question by chucking the chair in Christian's general direction. Well, that isn't much of an answer, is it? And snarkiness aside, that has to be one of the DUMBEST, most implausible stipulations I've ever seen added into a World Title match. It's almost insulting to the intelligence. But anyway, here's Teddy Long.

Teddy: Alright, Sheamus. Now just a minute. Now you're not the #1 contender, Sheamus. Christian is. Now it won't be for the title, but if you want to face Randy Orton tonight one-on-on, I'm sure Randy would oblige. As a matter of fact, that is going to be our main event tonight!

Later tonight, Kane faces Mark Henry. Plus...sigh...I guess since the roster's thinning out again, it's time to start playing Raw segments in their entirety again. We'll take a look at the Vince McMahon/John Cena segment from Raw later.

Ad break - Raw promo

Here's a look at the Wrestlemania 25 MitB match, won by Edge.

CODY RHODES & TED DiBIASE (w/MINIONS) v. DANIEL BRYAN & EZEKIEL JACKSON
Your hosts are the Usual Morons. They talk about whatever as Cody's minions hand Booker another paper bag.

We start with Cody and DiBiase locking up. DiBiase runs the ropes and runs into a Bryan kick for 2. DiBiase tries to cheap shot Jackson and gets wiped out for his troubles. Jackson gets the tag and runs wild on DiBiase. DiBiase charges in and gets dumped. Cody tries to take his shot and gets knocked off the apron. Bryan gets tagged in and takes out the heels with a suicide dive to take us to our next ad break.

We come back with Bryan working over Cody in the corner with kicks. Bryan's corner charge is caught and Cody turns it into an Alabama Slam for 2. Tag is made to DiBiase, who hammers away. Bryan tries to come back, but DiBiase reverses a right hand into a neat-looking Cobra Clutch backbreaker/dropkick combo for 2! DiBiase naturally follows up this cool combination by hitting the chinlock. Sigh. DiBiase tags out and Cody hits the kneedrop for 2. Cody hammers away in the corner and tags back out. DiBiase chokes away in the corner. Jackson tries to charge in and gets sent back over by the ref. DiBiase goes back to the chinlock. DiBiase charges in and eats a boot. Bryan hits his flying kick and makes the hot tag. Jackson cleans house on DiBiase and hits the corner lariat. Jackson hits a bodyslam and hits Rhodes with another bodyslam. Jackson goes for the Torture Rack on DiBiase, but DiBiase shoves him right into Cody, who hits the Beautiful Disaster! DiBiase finishes with Dream Street for the pin!

WINNERS: Cody Rhodes & Ted DiBiase - And that's two weeks in a row that Jackson's eaten a pin. The E really has no clue how to book a monster babyface champion, do they?

We go back to your hosts, the Morons, who go into their serious tone to talk about Mark Henry. They shoot it off to a video package for Mark Henry.

Backstage, the demoted Matt Striker asks Mark Henry to explain his actions. Striker says Henry's facing fines, suspensions, lawsuits, and a criminal investigation. Oh, come ON! There's suspension of disbelief and then there's just insulting to the intelligence. We're being asked to believe that Big Show getting run over by a car gets a shrug, but Mark Henry chucking a sound guy like a sack of potatoes warrants a criminal investigation? At least TRY and be consistent! Anyway, Striker asks Henry how he'll deal with Kane tonight and Big Show at the PPV. Henry just shoots him an Angry Black Man stare and sends Striker on his way.

Ad break

The Unexpected Moment of the Week is brought to you by Skittles - We take a look at Khali destroying Ranjin Singh from two months ago.

JINDER MAHAL v. TRENT BARRETA
Trent Barreta still gets no entrance. He's still cannon fodder. Full Nelson slam, goodbye.

WINNER: Jinder Mahal - SQUASH! Only notable for Khali attempting to do commentary.

Post-match, Mahal hits Barreta with another Full Nelson slam for fun.

Backstage, the demoted Todd Grisham talks to Sheamus, who asks about the recent rampage he's been on. Sheamus says it's an Irish thing and he wouldn't understand. I wonder if that's anything like "It's a Jersey thing." And I love how between Striker and Grisham, they haven't been able to get more than 10 words combined out of their interview subjects. Great job, guys!

Ad break - WWE Shopzone promo

TAMINA (w/ALICIA FOX) v. AJ (w/NATALYA)
Tamina gets no entrance. I'm going to have to put the sound on MUTE for this match, aren't I?

AJ goes for an armdrag and gets nowhere. Tamina lifts AJ up for a big choke and moves her into the corner. AJ tries using her speed, but runs into an elbow. Tamina powers AJ into the corner and hits her with the Umaga buttsplash! Tamina covers for 2 and hits the chinlock. Tamina goes for the gorilla press and misses. AJ makes the babyface comeback. Corner splash hits. Whip is reversed, but Tamina misses her own corner splash and AJ rolls her up for the pin!

WINNER: AJ - AJ doesn't look great on offense, but she can really sell, making Tamina look like a monster. They're both going to be great someday.

Post-match, Tamina and Alicia Fox have an argument over what just happened.

Coming up next, Kane faces Mark Henry. Oh boy...

Ad break - MitB Raw promo

We are taped from Tuscon, AZ. Hey, look! Cacti!

KANE v. MARK HENRY
Announcers note that Kane won last year's SmackDown MitB match and beat Rey Mysterio on the same night to win the World Title. Man, that's depressing to hear considering where Kane is just a short year later. Oh, well. At least he isn't Jack Swagger.

Time for a power match. Kane tries to work over Henry, but Henry takes control and works him over with his methodical offense. Kane comes back and hits the seated dropkick for 2. Kane climbs the turnbuckles, but his top-rope clothesline is caught and turned into a belly-to-belly suplex for 2! Henry works on Kane slowly until Kane makes the comeback with uppercuts. It goes nowhere, but Henry's corner charge misses. Kane's corner clothesline hits. Kane hits a big boot for 2. He goes up for the top-rope clothesline again and hits it this time. GOOZLE! But Henry breaks it and goes for the World's Strongest Slam! Kane shakes out of it and hits the chokeslam, but Henry gets his foot on the ropes. The fight goes to the outside and Kane clears off the announce table. Kane wants a chokeslam, but Henry blocks it and sends Kane into the steel post. Back in the ring we go, where Henry hits the silverback press for 2. Henry finishes with the World's Strongest Slam for the pin.

WINNER: Mark Henry - Proving once again that it's all fun and games with Mark Henry...until we actually have to watch him wrestle.

Post-match, Henry scares off the announcers for fun. Booker repeatedly tries to rat out Cole. Our hero, ladies and gentlemen. Henry throws some water around and leaves.

Backstage, the demoted Todd Grisham looks to have some better luck by talking to Randy Orton. Grisham asks the logical question of why Orton would be dumb enough to agree to those terms (thought not in those words). Orton says he did it because he's tired of Christian asking for one more match, so he'll beat him yet again. Orton says he'll be ready for Sheamus, who's coming for him next, and wishes Sheamus good luck for tonight.

Later tonight, the McMahon/Cena segment from Monday.

Ad break

Here's a video package of last year's MitB PPV, with Miz winning the Raw match.

TYSON KIDD v. SIN CARA
Holy crap, Tyson Kidd still works here! He gets no entrance, so he's naturally cannon fodder, but at least this should be entertaining.

We start with a wrestling sequence, which Kidd wins with a hammerlock. Crowd chants "Me-xi-co!", which is all kinds of awesome! SC counters the hammerlock and runs into an armdrag, before reversing into one of his own. SC nearly botches the headscissors/armdrag combo. SC jumps onto the apron and Kidd pulls him down face-first onto the apron. Kidd tries to run the ropes and gets caught with an enziguiri! Slingshot corkscrew splash gets 2! Kidd pulls SC down from the turnbuckles and turns him inside-out with a seated dropkick, as SC does a 540 sell! That was a HYPER JANNETTY sell job! Kidd slows the pace down with a chinlock. Kidd scoops up SC, but SC lands in the electric chair position. Kidd drops him across the ropes. Kidd goes for a springboard elbowdrop, but SC lifts the knees. SC's whip gets reversed. Kidd telegraphs a backdrop, so SC...sorta tackles him and goes to the mounted punches. Huh...didn't expect that. Kidd moves in, but falls prety to the handspring elbow and flying headscissors. Kidd charges into an elbow. SC moves into the electric chair position and rolls up Kidd for 2. Kidd stuns SC with a flip kick and climbs the turnbuckles. Kidd shoves him off, but SC rolls through the landing and comes right back with a seated dropkick. Flux Capacitor finishes for the pin!

WINNER: Sin Cara - I don't get to see much of Tyson Kidd anymore, so I enjoyed this. Both men had a good showing.

Backstage, the demoted Matt Striker asks Teddy Long what he'll do about Mark Henry. Long gives the PC answer, which causes Striker to asks if Henry intimidates him. Long gives no answer and walks away. Aw, crap. This is going to led into another Mark Henry world title chase, isn't it?

Later tonight, Randy Orton faces Sheamus.

Ad break

JUSTIN GABRIEL & HEATH SLATER v. THE USOS
The Usos do a ceremonial Polynesian war dance on top of the ramp before making their entrance. Remember when these guys first arrived and said that they WEREN'T the typical Samoan tag team? Well, it got the crowd going, at least, so points given there.

We start with Jey and Gabriel, as Jey gets a quick Northern Lights for 2. Slater makes the blind tag and takes out Jey. Slater and Jey exchange blows, before Slater tags out. Gabriel and Slater double-team Jey briefly and Gabriel covers for 2. Gabriel gets the side headlock, before both guys take each other out with boots. Tags are made on both sides and Jimmy cleans house on Slater. Jimmy hits the sitout Full Nelson drop. Samoan drop gets 2, before Gabriel breaks up the cover. Jimmy's corner splash misses and Slater hits a neckbreaker. Slater tags out and Gabriel, who climbs the ropes. Gabriel urges Slater to turn Jimmy around and set him up for the Sternum-Crushing 450 Splash. Unfortunaetly, Slater's a little slow on the uptake, allowing Jimmy to recover and shove Slater away, who falls into the ropes and crotches Gabriel! Jimmy tags Jey. Jimmy hits a superplex and Jey comes off with the Superfly splash for the pin.

WINNERS: The Usos - Good showcase for the Usos and nice (what I presume is) angle advancement for Gabriel and Slater, as they go into the every-man-for-himself MitB match.

Coming up next, a Raw segment in its entirety.

Ad break

Here's Johnny Curtis, who takes a guys birthday cake. Oh, he's going to take the cake. I get it! Ok, we get the point. ENOUGH ALREADY with this guy! Either have him wrestle or get him off my TV!

Raw Rewind recaps last Monday's Raw. To make me eat my words, the McMahon/Cena segment is NOT shown in its entirety. My mistake. That leads into the card recap for MitB.

Randy Orton makes his entrance for the main event, which is next.

Ad break

WWE Smack of the Night - Sheamus destroys Randy Orton and Christian and tears up their contract.

RANDY ORTON v. SHEAMUS: NON-TITLE MATCH
After Sheamus makes his entrance, Christian's music hits to bring out the MitB challenger. Christian's here to give away the ending to the match do some commentary.

We start with a lock-up, as Orton hammers on Sheamus in the corner. Sheamus quickly comes back and pounds on Orton. Sheamus misses a corner charge and Orton hits a dropkick. Orton wants the Punt of Plot Convenience, but it isn't convenient to the plot, so Sheamus rolls out of the ring. Sheamus comes back in and misses with the Irish Hammer. Orton whips Sheamus into the ropes and hits the Thesz Press BY GAWD, but Sheamus rolls over and starts hammering on Orton. The fight goes to the outside, where Orton starts slamming Sheamus into the barricade and apron. Sheamus reverses a whip and sends Orton into the barricade before rolling him back into the ring. Orton catches Sheamus and wants the hanging DDT, but Sheamus backdrops him onto the apron. Sheamus sends Orton's shoulder into the steel post. Christian removes the headset and moves in on Orton, but Sheamus chases him off, saying he wants Orton for himself. Sheamus sends Orton into the steel post to send us to our final ad break of the night.

We come back with Sheamus hitting the hammerlock. Orton comes back, but Sheamus takes him down with a knee. Sheamus looks for a single-arm DDT, but Orton hangs on to the ropes. Sheamus charges in and gets backdropped onto the apron. Sheamus is able to hang Orton's arm on the ropes, but the slingshot Irish missile misses. Orton makes the big comeback. Orton charges in and eats a boot, but he's still able to get Sheamus with a belly-to-belly suplex for 2. Orton moves in and Sheamus fends him with a boot. Sheamus shows some awesome athleticism when he skins the cat to put himself on the top rope from a sitting position! He follows that with a top-rope shoulderblock for 2. Sheamus telegraphs a backdrop, but Orton's flurry is quickly stopped with the Irish Curse. Sheamus hits with a pair of Irish Hammers before kneedropping Orton into mush. Brogue Kick is nearly turned into an RKO, before Sheamus shoves Orton into the ropes. Sheamus scoops him up, but Orton cuonters into his backbreaker. VIPER COIL! And of course, Christian runs in for the DQ.

WINNER BY DQ: Randy Orton - Angle advancement that we saw coming a mile away. Carry on.

Post-match, Christian continues to beat down Orton. Having already established that he wants Orton for himself, Sheamus isn't too happy with this and wipes out Christian with the Brogue Kick! Orton's recovered by this point, so he takes Sheamus out with the RKO! Play Orton's music!

FINAL THOUGHT

The dynamics in the world title match feel really weird. It REALLY feels like they're building for a Triple Threat match and...well...it kinda SHOULD be a Triple Threat match, considering all three guys have issues with each other and it'd be a whole lot fresher than having Orton fight Christian for the 50th time (in Sheamus' own words). Why not just do the Triple Threat match? Unless the plan is for Sheamus to win, they could just as easily plug someone else into the MitB match and the world would still go round.

Good show this week, as we still got plenty of good wrestling and angle advancement. I'm surprised we haven't gotten more interaction between the MitB match participants (as Gabriel and Slater got sent off to play with the Usos while Sin Cara fought Tyson Kidd, of all people), but I guess they're saving that for next week.

Until next time!

(edited by It's False on 10.7.11 1133)

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ekedolphin
Scrapple








Since: 12.1.02
From: Indianapolis, IN; now residing in Suffolk, VA

Since last post: 158 days
Last activity: 5 days
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.23

You'd think that Sin Cara's opponents would stop climbing the turnbuckles after awhile. Also, the World Title match should definitely be a triple-threat.



"Let me tell you something, Leo... after heroin and cocaine, tobacco is next."
"Great. Another criminal empire we can give birth to."
--President Jed Bartlet and Leo McGarry, The West Wing

Fan of the Indianapolis Colts (Super Bowl XLI Champions), Indiana Pacers and Washington Nationals

Certified RFMC Member-- Ask To See My Credentials!

Co-Winner of Time's Person of the Year Award, 2006

J. Kyle
Boudin blanc








Since: 21.2.02
From: The Land of Aloha

Since last post: 113 days
Last activity: 9 days
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Y!:
#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.85
Nous ne nous pouvons pas sortir.
A 90 second Curtis skit is easier to digest than 15 seconds of him wrestling, if NXT can be trusted.



CRZ
Big Brother
Administrator








Since: 9.12.01
From: ミネアポリス

Since last post: 8 hours
Last activity: 3 hours
AIM:  
ICQ:  
Y!:
#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 9.39
    Originally posted by J. Kyle
    A 90 second Curtis skit is easier to digest than 15 seconds of him wrestling, if NXT can be trusted.
The progression of Curtis promos has really been something to behold. It started with him merely making allusions and letting us fill in the blanks and figure it out on our own, but each week he's had to dumb it down more and more because (I am guessing here) the Smackdown audience isn't quite bright enough to "Get It?™" without Curtis having to come right out and say whatever it is he's acting out. SEE THIS? I AM TAKING THE CAKE. THAT IS WHAT I AM DOING. TAKING THE CAKE.

Really embarrassing for wrestling fandom as a whole, and for us in particular for continuing to hold membership within said wrestling fandom.



ekedolphin
Scrapple








Since: 12.1.02
From: Indianapolis, IN; now residing in Suffolk, VA

Since last post: 158 days
Last activity: 5 days
#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.23

    Originally posted by CRZ
      Originally posted by J. Kyle
      A 90 second Curtis skit is easier to digest than 15 seconds of him wrestling, if NXT can be trusted.
    The progression of Curtis promos has really been something to behold. It started with him merely making allusions and letting us fill in the blanks and figure it out on our own, but each week he's had to dumb it down more and more because (I am guessing here) the Smackdown audience isn't quite bright enough to "Get It?™" without Curtis having to come right out and say whatever it is he's acting out. SEE THIS? I AM TAKING THE CAKE. THAT IS WHAT I AM DOING. TAKING THE CAKE.

    Really embarrassing for wrestling fandom as a whole, and for us in particular for continuing to hold membership within said wrestling fandom.


Or, just as likely, WWE just believes that Viewers Are Morons. (Without it necessarily being true).

(edited by ekedolphin on 11.7.11 2000)


"Let me tell you something, Leo... after heroin and cocaine, tobacco is next."
"Great. Another criminal empire we can give birth to."
--President Jed Bartlet and Leo McGarry, The West Wing

Fan of the Indianapolis Colts (Super Bowl XLI Champions), Indiana Pacers and Washington Nationals

Certified RFMC Member-- Ask To See My Credentials!

Co-Winner of Time's Person of the Year Award, 2006

OndaGrande
Kolbasz








Since: 1.5.03
From: California, Home of THE LAKERS!

Since last post: 7 days
Last activity: 19 hours
#6 Posted on

my impression is that Curtis is doing the same kind of things Zack Ryder is doing on youtube ("drawing" money, not on the same page, etc) but without the personality to back it up.



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While I was in Toronto on vacation visiting my sister, I had the chance to check out a show put on by UWA Hardcore Wrestling, the home fed of Chris Bishop and Lionel Knight. Here is what I saw and here is what I thought.
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