TKG: Helmsley with a corsage. I assume he was going to be playing wing later tonight when Lawler goes trolling Tampa high school proms. Wingman for Lawler is a pretty good use for Helmsley.
TKG: I knew Lita was lucha trained and all, but damn that was a sweet Super Astro style tope. That it was probably a blown spot doesn’t make it any less cool.
PAS: Mark Henry delivers the only in ring highlight as usual. Maven is a really shitty face in peril, but Mark Henry and Hardy are a fun tag team, and I liked the body work some. I don’t see much of a point of this match but it was fine.
TKG: This was best match on show by alot. Hardy was solid and dug Henry’s punch to the kidney. Still what the fuck is up with long Maven as face in peril section. He can’t work. His facial selling while in submissions was horrid. They fired Goldust and so now Maven works face in peril. Seeing how much they were able to do with Maven, really made me think Matt/Mark could become a really great Bulldogsish tag team. Hardy eats the pin and he’s getting a bigger push on the show he isn’t on.
PAS: YEAH KILL THOSE ANTI-SEMITIES, fucking French, just kissing up to all their Algerians. DO IT FOR THE JEWS, STICK IT TO THE GOYEM.
TKG: Is there a Larouchite heel tag team that he can beat up next week?
PAS: I was really shitting on them hotshotting the Foley return, so I was glad that they didn’t actually have the match. I imagine the angle will get fucked up pretty soon, but I really dug the start of it. Anything that gets us away from third rate Catskill comic Foley is a-okay with me.
TKG: I'm betting the Orton/Foley "match" gets a better rating than that 20minute NWO vs. Luger/DDP match they ran at top of hour.
TKG: Really happy Bischoff released Goldberg for thirty days so he can tag with Takada vs. Hash/Ogawa. That’s the only current WWE angle where I am looking forward to the match payoff.
TKG: Ross calling the “tigerbomb”.
What Didn’t Work
PAS: Conflicted Chris Jericho is pretty bad. I don’t think he will ever get on James Liptons show with that emoting.
TKG: How many times have they run Kane vs. Jericho? Has it ever been good?
TKG: I liked RVD’s arm work at the beginning of the six man. Yeah inexplicably, RVD does bodypart work and it doesn’t suck. His dive did suck. Helmsley’s body work was decent too. And Flair got to hit a side suplex and nice punches. But goddamn was this bad. It goes through two commercial breaks and felt endless. Heidenreichenstein bumped more in his match, than Michaels. Evolution may be the worst Freebirds ever. Jimmy Garvin, Michael Ps Hayes and Badstreet with DDP and Big Daddy Dink. Current Flair is no Fantasia. And well Humperdink could work a bounty angle better than Helmsley. DDP’s Diamond Booty Babe had less fake looking tits than Batista. And they’re going to fucking run Helmsley vs. Michaels again. Idiots.
PAS: How does D-Von Dudley have a job in the WWE Is there a more useless guy standing backstage in wrestling then D-Von? At least Bubba has nice shorts. Can you imagine how Lance Wright, Sign Guy Dudley, “Six Pack” Jay Sulli, Don Callis, Sinister Minister, Joel Gertner, Bill Alfonso, Joey Styles, Matty in the House, Tod Gordon, Sal E. Graziano, Judge Jeff Jones, Lou E. Dangerously and all other marginal ECW castoffs who used to stand around backstage, must feel when they see D-Von employed?
TKG: I think D-Von could have been a better Michaels tag partner than RVD, if they’re running this Creationists stable vs. Evolution. They would need to bring in George South so someone can do the ringwork for the creationist stable.
PAS: I can’t believe they are pushing Shawn Michaels again. Meltzer is constantly bitching about the WWE 50/50 booking, which is true, it is amusing that the only guy they protect is an old fey cripple with a pot belly.
TKG: Heidenreich controlling on Rico from heat is this weeks male body spray "shot of the week". Who exactly are they trying to market to? I mean last week it was Venis/Storm vs. Cade/Jindrak. That at least makes sense. But Heidenrich/Rico? If your in the scat domination scene do you really care what your partner smells like?
FOOTAGE! of last week's appearance of Mick and the ensuing "reign of terror", culminating with the Mandible Claw. Fighting evil by moonlight, winning love by daylight, never running from a real fight, because it is time to WAKE UP!