Since the board that I mod has somehow turned into a combo of RSPW and Newsmax, and there doesn't seem to be anything that anyone can do about it...glad to have W back up and running.
TKG: This show was filled with long shitty stuff, and really made me upset that I watched this instead of The Girlfriends finale. Still delivered a couple matches and PALUMBO.
TKG: CHUCK PALUMBO~!!!!! Now when is Mark Henry coming back already?
PAS: Koko Ware is a bunch of fun in all the current Memphis TV I have seen. He is pretty old so he doesn't bump much, but he has a bunch of varied, fun and nasty offense. Flair has got to be 10 years older then Koko, and he has taken the opposite route, he doesn't use any of his offense, but is taking huge backdrops and getting powerslamed on the floor. I really think Koko has the smarter approach.
PAS: Hurricane + Rosey v. La Resistance was Heatastic. Nice and long, with Helms bumping like a total freak, and Rosey looking great. I think Rosey is the better of Three Minute Warning and I think he could have the better match with Kawada. Compared to Muto though I would take Rosey, Jamal, Mana, Samoa Joe, Barbarian, Jimmy Snuka Jr., Jimmy Snuka Sr., Haku, Haku Jr, King Adamo, King Dabadaba, Toa the Samoan Beast and the Afa son who beat up the old lady.
TKG: I liked this match more than Schneider and until late in the Evolution match, I would have said this was the better of the two tags. Helms did nice job with the knee story, thought his work was better than Jerichos. Thought Conway's stuff looked really good too. But damn does Grenier stink, he can't even pull down the ropes properly. Fuck, I mean Doug Basham is stuck tagged with the useless Jim Norton and even Norton can do the pull down the ropes spot.
PAS: I liked the long tag match this week even better then last week. The faces didn't do much, but I really enjoyed all of the nifty arm work on Jericho, with Orton clearly reading all of the tOa criticism, and busting out the hammerlock, divorce court and short arm scissors. They finally gave Shelton a finisher too.
TKG: I think Shelton's had the exploder before when he was in the tag team and back when he was a Heat jobber working Regal. He was just forced to work as Sambo-Sting to satisfy some sort of weird Helmsley fantasy. Unfortunately they're still having Shelton run scared from the Saxon Scorpion on the houseshows.
TKG: I really liked Orton jacking Don Arakawa's arm wringer though the ropes spot. and his arm offense was alot better than the stuff he used last week. Still Batista would then come into the ring and just smoke Orton's arm work. Actually he'd smoke everyone in the ring. Everyone in the show.
PAS: Kate was in and out of sleep on the couch while we were watching this show, and thought that Shawn Micheals was a 7 year old girl wrestler with a man's voice. That is a way better gimmick, it is too bad her dad doesn't own the WWE.
What Didn't Work
PAS: Man alive the "Who is the Salem Serial Killer" acting in that Lita sketch was awful. Doesn't Stephanie work during the day? Did someone buy her a TiVo?
TKG: WWE films wants to build a movie around Kane? So earlier today I'm reading in the Post's subway edition about how Snoop is working behind the scenes to fund a Miles Davis biopic starring himself. Watching Kane's acting tonight, Snoop's idea seems the better of the two. Fuck you cast Eminem as Chet Baker, Nate Dogg as Charlie Parker, and Dazz Dilinger as Sonny Rollins and it would still be better than this Kane/Lita shit tonight. Don Magic Juan as Mingus and you could put DJ Yella back in the No Vaseline makeup and have him play Gill Evans. Still would make for better TV than this.
TKG: I enjoy Chris Jericho as commentator on Vh1's Best Week Ever, but him and Orton aren't going to make me forget Rosey O'Donnel and Selleck.
PAS: Damn face Victoria is shitty. They fire Christopher and have Victoria steal his gimmick? That is wrong, Crank isn't free, the guy has to make a living.
TKG: What the fuck. They drop the Tatu tune and now are trying to sell Victoria as a female 2 Cold Scorpio. Two-COLE!! TWO-_Cole!! I mean 2 Cold was never convincing as a breakdancer but damn. She isn't even the lesser one of Flash Funk's Funkettes. I mean Nidia has the stripper experience, give her the dancing gimmick. Victoria's as babyface who came out and hugged Naylor every show was better than this shit.
TKG: Tease me with Regal and then don't deliver. FUCK YOU!! If he isn't cleared why is he involved in the worst pull apart I've ever seen. I mean damn Bobby Eaton is older than dirt and can't bump anymore but he and Smothers can pull off a believable pull apart.This wasn't as good as the pull aparts during the Piper vs. Flair WCW run.
PAS: I really like Beniot, but anyone besides Satanico would have been a disappointment replacing Regal. Plus during that awful brawl you have Regal holding back Helmsley and Finlay holding back Micheals. Finlay's still Irish, Regal's still British, why the fuck do I have to watch Micheals and HHH slapbox.
TKG: So they give up on booking Bischoff as Richard Deacon and instead book him as Paul Bremmer? I guess its a step up? But still not a particularly good use of Bischoff.
TKG: How many F-5s did Heyman take before he needed surgery? Damn Coach is going to need surgery soon.
PAS: Harley Race told Benoit not to use that headbutt, and now he is encouraging Tards to do it?
Because on RAW they could put him with A-Train and have the Spceman Spiff/OldSchoolHero Favourite Big-Man Tag-Team Of Awesomeness. DO IT DO IT DO IT
(edited by oldschoolhero on 28.5.04 1051) Once upon a time in China, some believe, around the year one double-ought three, head priest of the White Lotus Clan, Pai Mei was walking down the road, contemplating whatever it is that a man of Pai Mei's infinite power contemplates - which is another way of saying "who knows" - when a Shaolin monk appeared, traveling in the opposite direction. As the monk and the priest crossed paths, Pai Mei, in a practically unfathomable display of generosity, gave the monk the slightest of nods. The nod was not returned. Now was it the intention of the Shaolin monk to insult Pai Mei or did he just fail to see the generous social gesture? The motives of the monk remain unknown. What is known, are the consequences. The next morning Pai Mei appeared at the Shaolin Temple and demanded of the Temple's head abbot that he offer Pai Mei his neck to repay the insult. The Abbot at first tried to console Pai Mei, only to find Pai Mei was inconsolable. So began the massacre of the Shaolin Temple and all 60 of the monks inside at the fists of the White Lotus. And so began the legend of Pai Mei's five point palm exploding heart technique.
Well, I guess you're not buying Wrestlemania, considering: 1) Rock's never wrestling another match again, and 2) Austin isn't coming back to wrestle unless it's a big money main event match. I thought that was pretty much a given?