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The W - Pro Wrestling - RAW #936 5/2/11
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geemoney
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TONIGHT: John Cena is once again WWE Champion following Extreme Rules last night. That means he’ll have the title during The Rock’s special birthday celebration this week, a celebration that promises surprises. However, he’ll defend that title against Miz tonight. Alberto Del Rio lost in his bid to become World Champion, so we may see how he fits on Raw this week. Also, Kharma debuted last night…we’ll see if one of the Divas gets fed to her tonight. WWE is nothing if not patriotic, so they’ll also be holding a party to celebrate this country’s patriotism after the news of the death of Osama bin Laden.


- WWE Open.

-A montage aired about 9/11, with comments from George W. Bush narrating still images from September 11th. Then, clips of Smackdown from September 13, 2001, with Vince McMahon in the ring and the wrestlers lined up on the ramp to salute America. Comments from Bradshaw and vocals from Lillian Garcia singing the National Anthem followed.

-Live in the arena, Justin Roberts introduce Lilian to sing the National Anthem. Nice pop for her (or the Anthem). She hit it out of the park, of course. Chants of “USA” commenced.

-RAW Open.

-Josh Mathews referred to tonight as “the biggest party in the history of television,” combining Rock’s birthday and the USA celebration. They don’t every pass on an opportunity for hyperbole, do they? Jerry Lawler plugged Rock’s birthday celebration, then Michael Cole noted John Cena would defend his WWE Title against The Miz.

-The Rock came out. That took quite a while. He started his “Finally, the Rock has come back…” but then ended with “home” after a pause where the crowd filled in “Miami.” Rock said he had one thing to say: we got him. The crowd lit up at that one, and chanted “USA” again. He thanked the men and women who fight for this country every day. He said he has family members in the military and said he was proud of SEAL Team Six and the country. He asked America to join in with him in reciting the Pledge of Allegiance. I can’t even get kids in school to say this anymore! Another “USA” chant. This crowd is going for a world record in that regard. If there’s a Hacksaw Jim Duggan match slated for this evening, you might as well give it to’em.

Rock talked about his birth, saying when the doctors looked at him when he popped out of the womb, the doctors said, “this baby is damn sure named Johnson.” Rock said when he was in high school, he looked like the lead singer from Menudo. They showed a pic from high school, and my roommate said he looked more like Billy Dee Williams. Rock said laugh if you must, but at that age, he demolished more pie than King Kong Bundy in a Polish bakery. Rock talked about moving on to college, playing at the Universiy of Miami. Rock said he was ready to party all over South Beach. He was going to end with his catchphrase, but the GM buzzed in.

Cole handled the announcement, amid mucho heel heat. As he began reading, Rock interrupted. Rock said he can’t hear Cole, who had the gall to interrupt him on his birthday. He asked Cole to read it to the Rock’s face. Cole declined then tried to continue, but Rock interrupted again. Rock said if Cole is scared, he understands. He said Cole won his match at Wrestlemania and won at Extreme Rules. He said Cole must think he’s a tough guy. He can either be a tough guy or the voice of WWE. He can read the message in front of the Rock or sit in his glass case and look like a drunk hobbit jackbag bitch. Cole said he doesn’t know what jackbag means, but he’s not scare of anything. He said he’s not the same person Rock used to know, the kid Rock whose head Rock threw t-shirts on. He’s a man, and he associates with winners. Crowd gave the “what” chant to Cole, until he took off his jacket, and they all let out a collective “whoa.” Cole took off his button-up shirt and revealed a Celtics jersey, sure to rile the pro-Heat crowd. “What’s the matter Miami, are you jealous?” Cole asked. Cole said he would deliver the message to his face, and called him “Dwayne.”

Cole walked to the ring with his jersey and slacks. He said the Raw GM wants an apology from Rock for what happened at Wrestlemania, or he’s going to shut down the birthday party. And while he’s at it, Cole wanted an apology too, for all the embarrassment he put him through over the years. He told Rock to just say he’s sorry. Rock said he did disrespect the GM at Wrestlemania, and he has disrespected Cole over the years. Rock said he has just one thing to say: “I’m sorry.” He extended his hand for a handshake, but Cole seemed to be having second thoughts. He told Cole to accept his apology like a man. Cole shook Rock’s hand and thanked him. They seemed to be joking off-mic. Rock said thank you, and “go Heat, bitch,” (which was bleeped) then gave him the Rock Bottom. People’s Elbow followed. They played Rock’s music, but he had more. He said this was Rock’s hometown, and he asked Miami to welcome Mr. 305, Pitbull. I had no idea that’s what he looked like. He came out and spoke Spanish, then said they’d represent Dade County style. He did some singing, then the Heat Cheerleaders came out and danced on the stage (I assume it was the Heat cheerleaders). The hometown crowd was more receptive to this musical performance than crowds in the past. Good enough segment that didn’t really have a lot to do with wrestling, but that’s the kind of movie star/pop star segment WWE would love to create more often.

-John Morrison vs. R-Truth is next.

-LeBron James and Dwayne Wade gave out birthday wishes to The Rock in a pre-taped snippet.

[Commercial Break]

-JR joined Mathews and Lawler on commentary, replacing Cole.

-John Morrison came to the ring for a match with R-Truth, but he was attacked from behind by Truth. That’d be somewhat unique if they didn’t just do it with Kofi and Sheamus on Smackdown. Morrison had to be helped to the back by referees, as Morrison was holding his neck. You knew it wasn’t over because they stayed on it so long, and sure enough, Truth came out and gave his Paydirt finisher to Morrison on the top of the ramp. Fine angle, as I’m glad they didn’t give away this one-on-one match already.

[Commercial Break]

-They showed the Miami skyline as Mathews told how you could tweet birthday wishes to the Rock.

-Jimmy Kimmel gave his birthday wishes to the Rock, showing he was literally a candy ass.

(1) Maryse vs. Kelly Kelly
JR said Morrison is being checked over by WWE doctors and that he’d pass on more info as it becomes available. I bet it’s the last time we hear about it tonight. Kelly took Maryse down, then slammed her head into the mat. Kharma’s music played less than 20 seconds into the match and she got a big pop. JR acted like he didn’t even hear the music, continuing to talk about the match. Lawler implored Kelly to get out of the ring.

Winner: No contest, about :30 (no bell).

Maryse was somehow still selling what must have been quite a brutal single head slam to the mat. Kelly was cowering in the corner of the ring. Kharma went for Kelly, but then picked Maryse instead. Maryse fell victim to the Implant Buster, screaming as she went up for it. She sold it nicely, too. Kharma looked over to Kelly, but I guess she figured she’d save her for another day.

-The Miz was shown sitting backstage. Alex Riley walked in wearing a suit, talking about it being a madhouse because of the Rock. Miz asked Riley why he was late, and he said he couldn’t get here because of all the traffic for Rock’s birthday. Miz asked Riley why he wasn’t at ringside during his title match last night. Riley said he was drafted to Smackdown. Miz said he has a personal services contract that supercedes any WWE draft. Miz said Riley better be at ringside for his match tonight, because when he’s done, no one will be talking about the Rock…they’ll be talking about Miz as the new WWE Champion.

-A plug for the title match aired, then more for Rock’s birthday party.

-Paul Walker, Rock’s co-star in The Fast Five, did a video birthday greeting, doing Cena’s You Can’t See Me, and told Rock to pass on a message for “Fruity Pebbles.”

[Commercial Break]

-Samuel L. Jackson, Rock’s co-star from The Other Guys, said he bets this birthday celebration is nothing compared to Rock’s birthday on whatever planet he came from. He even said he’d run through hungry wolves wearing steak drawers for him. It’s true…Samuel L. Jackson IS in everything!

-The Rock was holding court with some of the WWE Divas backstage. He walked around the room, and other WWE Superstars were there too. It looked like the same room set-up as Smackdown’s Christmas party when Cole puked (or whatever that celebration was for). Vladimir Kozlov said he had a movie script for Rock, and Santino came in dressed as . Then Hornswoggle walked in dressed as the Scorpion King. Horny feigned a toothache, so Santino said he had just the person. Great Khali walked in dressed as the Tooth Fairy. “You can’t handle the tooth,” he said. Hornswoggle is back to mumbling and not speaking English. Rock said he had the perfect person for this situation. Ron Simmons walked up, looked at all the costumes, and said “damn.”

-Miz and Cena were walking in a split-screen…that match is next.

[Commercial Break]

-The next birthday wish was from Steve Carell, who jokingly said he was wishing Dwayne Johnson a Happy Birthday against his will. He said he was told money was involved, yet there was no money. He said he has worked with Johnson, which made him like him even less. Then he cut the joking and seriously wished him a happy birthday and said he hopes to see him soon.

(2) The Miz vs. John Cena – WWE Championship Match
In over one hour, we’ve had about 20 seconds of wrestling. Hip-toss from Cena, then a dropkick for a quick cover. Face-buster by Cena for two, the second cover in the span of the opening minute. Miz turned the tide when Cena put his head down too soon. Alex Riley got on the apron and Cena decked him, allowing Miz to take over on offense. With Cena sent outside the ring, Riley lowered the boom on him. Miz went to ringside and whipped Cena into the unforgiving steel steps. Back in the ring, a two-count for Miz. Miz came off with a double axe-handle for two. They took a break 3:07 into the match.

[Commercial Break]

Back 6:01 into the match. Miz still in control, and he hit a neck-breaker for a two-count. JR said he was surprised Miz invoked his rematch clause tonight. Corner clothesline missed the mark and Cena turned the tide just shy of 7:00 in. Five-Knuckle Shuffle, but Miz countered the AA and booted Cena square in the head. Cena locked in the STF and Miz was near the ropes. He grabbed the bottom rope, and Cena broke at 8:10. But Miz kicked Cena in the knee, then gave him a low DDT for two. Miz exposed a corner turnbuckle but Cena blocked the attempt by Miz. Miz grabbed the ropes on an AA try, then did his neck-breaker combos for a very near-fall at 9:25. Cena blocked the Skull Crushing Finale, but in the process, shoved MIz into the ref. The ref was knocked out of the ring, unbeknownst to Cena. Cena had the AA put on and Miz tapped, so Cena thought he won, until he realized there was no ref. Riley came in, but was put up in the AA. Miz got to Cena and gave him the Skull Crushing Finale. Riley awoke the ref who crawled into the ring and registered a two-count. Miz walked into an Attitude Adjustmen, but only for two. Crowd was surprised at that one. Both men were down, but Riley fed Miz the title and distracted the ref. Miz clocked Cena with the belt and made the cover, picking up the win.

Winner: Miz, at 12:11.

But Wait! The referee must’ve seen the title, and thus reversed the decision, awarding Cena the win by DQ.

Winner: Cena, via DQ, at 12:11. I didn’t mind the false finish there. It made more sense than hot-shotting the belt from Cena back to Miz. Match was good and the crowd was into it.

Miz yelled at Riley and shoved him, but Cena went on the attack, giving Riley and Miz separate AA’s.

-Rock’s birthday continues tonight. In fact, right now! Ellen DeGeneres wished Rock a happy birthday via video and complimented his catchphrase, saying she’s going to come up with cooking-related catchphrases herself.

[Commercial Break]

-Tyler Perry wished Rock happy birthday and even did his Madea voice to wish Rock happy birthday as well.

-More shots of Miami with the announcers telling fans how to wish Rock happy birthday via Twitter.

-The announcers talked on camera about Cena retaining his title tonight after winning it last night. Lawler said Cena had the privilege of making a very important announcement to the crowd last night. Then they showed Cena making the announcement about Osama last night to the crowd after the PPV went off the air. I guess saying we “killed” him wasn’t PG enough.

-Ricardo Rodriguez introduced Alberto Del Rio, who was not dressed to compete. It didn’t seem to be much worse for the wear after last night’s match. Del Rio will joine the commentary team for this tag match involving wrestlers drafted from Smackdown to Raw.

(3) Rey Mysterio & Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre & Jack Swagger
McIntyre stood over Swagger as he did his push-ups on the way to the ring. Waistlock take-down by Swagger on Rey to begin things. Rey landed a headscissor on Swagger, sending him face-first intot he second turnbuckle. Kingston propelled himself off of Rey’s back and into Swagger in the corner. ADR was pretty quiet on commentary. Del Rio blamed Edge for costing him the title last night. McIntyre clotheslined Kofi from the apron as the ref’s back was turned. Swagger took advantage as they went to break at 1:33 of the match.

[Commercial Break]

Swagger was still in control out of break, just prior to the 5:00 mark. McIntyre tagged in as JR scolded ADR for calling Mysterio a “Chihuahua.” Kofi tried to come back but McIntyre shoved him down. Kingston tried to fight out of the heel corner, but Swagger just smothered him and beat him down with rights and elbows. Del Rio continued to put down Mysterio, and it sounds like we’re getting that feud again, this time on Raw. At 7:34, Kofi flipped out of an attempted back suplex by McIntyre, and made the tag to Rey. Mysterio took Mac down with some kicks and a lateral press was broken up by Swagger. Kingston tossed Swagger out of the ring after he tried to interfere. Trouble in Paradise on McIntyre, then the 619. Del Rio left the commentary table and Rey shot him a look, then did his splash and picked up the win.

Winners: Kofi and Rey, at 8:38. The extended beat-down on Kofi was a bit much, but otherwise was fine.

-WWE was involved in the Anti-Bullying “Be a Star” campaign. Among those interviewed in Washington were Triple H, America Ferrara, Ariel Winter, Michelle Trachtenberg, David Arquette, Alyssa Milano, Jeremy Piven, Jack McBrayer, Omar Epps, Jason Biggs, Tim Daly, Simon Helberg, and Shay Mitchell (phew! Did I miss anyone?), and some commented on WWE’s new movie, which has an anti-bullying plot.

-Ludacris wished his dog, The Rock, a happy birthday. He talked about co-starring with Rock in Fast Five and showed off his biceps.

[Commercial Break]

-Miami’s own Dan Marino wished Rock a happy birthday and even did his eyebrow raise.

-Rock was talking to Christian during the birthday party and talked about how proud he was of Christian. Vickie Guerrero walked in and did her “excuse me” to get everyone’s attention. She and Dolph Ziggler got him a gift. It was a giant cake and Ziggler said he knows Rock won’t eat it since he loves pie. He moved the cake aside (it was like the kind strippers pop out of), and Mae Young walked in wearing a bathing suit and a “happy birthday Rock” sash. Ziggler and Vickie laughed at their joke. Rock said the joke is on them, since Vickie can lose all the weight she wants, but she’ll never look as beautiful as Mae. Rock even laid the lips on Mae. Rock said he gets more pie in one night than Ziggler gets in a lifetime. Rock turned around and right into Cena. Cena said he brought a new gift…the WWE Championship. He said he won it, and he’ll keep it until Wrestlemania 28. Cena said the gift is making the biggest match in WM history even bigger because if Rock wants the title, he has to go through him. “Just bring it,” Rock said. Cena wished him a happy birthday, then walked out.

-Kane was walking backstage, his tag title over his shoulder. Next, Kane faces Mason Ryan. Oh dear Jesus.

[Commercial Break]

-Mathews gave a shout out to Pitbull and his song “Give Me Everything.” The album is out in June.

-George Lopez sent out a birthday wish to The Rock, even giving him gifts. Coupons for massages. He asked if you could smell what he’s cooking, then put on a fake raised eyebrow.

(4) Mason Ryan vs. Kane
Ryan came out with CM Punk, to Punk’s theme. Ryan powered Kane out of the ring with a lock-up. Back in, Kane grabbed a side headlock. The two collided in mid-ring, neither budging, then Ryan clotheslined him. Ryan picked Kane up and slammed him, with ease. Kane turned the tide and whipped Ryan into the turnbuckle. Punk interfered and Kane clotheslined him, drawing the DQ.

Winner: Kane, via DQ, at 1:39. THAT was the main event?

The rest of Nexus interfered, but Kane held them at bay. He got Ryan in a choke for a chokeslam, but Ryan powered out and gave Kane his finisher. The gang attacked Kane until Big Show ran out and made the save. Ryan, however, was the only one who could take Big Show down, and he did so with a spear. Then he walked out, leaving the rest of Nexus to collect themselves at ringside. Ryan made some weird faces and breathed heavily on the top of the ramp. Not sure what he was trying to get across there.

-Regis and Kelly wished Rock a happy 39th birthday. Regis said 39 was the size of his biceps, and Kelly told Regis to challenge Rock to a duel.

[Commercial Break]

-The final birthday wish was from Craig Ferguson, who said Rock frightens him the most, yet smells the best.

-Rock came out again, and said all proceeds from the “Team Bring It” t-shirt will go to the Wounded Warrior Project. He asked if everyone had a good time tonight, and said before the big finale, he thanked everyone for coming out tonight and making tonight one of the best nights of his life. Most of the people in the crowd had birthday hats on. Rock thanked his family, who were in attendance tonight. Rock said as a proud Hurricane and a son of Miami, he promised that next year’s Wrestlemania will be the biggest and best of all-time.

All of a sudden, Vince McMahon’s music hit, and the Chairman came out. The first camera shot of him was obscured by the crane cam, and they quickly cut away. Vince wished Rock a happy birthday then thanked Rock for allowing everyone to celebrate his birthday with him. He also thanked Rock for pulling him aside early in Rock’s career, where he asked Vince to give him the opportunity to run with the ball. He thanked Rock for his passion, respect, humanity, the opportunity for the crowd to say “what,” which they had been doing. Vince thanked Rock for being The Rock. On behalf of WWE, he said they put together a birthday present for him. Vince said of all the thank-yous, he thanked Rock for coming home. Then a video package aired, set to “I’m Coming Home,” the song they used for Tribute to the Troops. It showed Rock as a kid, playing football, his family in the business, then some of his highlights. Back live, Rock seemed genuinely touched and the crowd chanted “Rocky.” Singing Happy Birthday to the Rock…Mya. She came out and said she wanted to lead the crowd in song for Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. They all sang Happy Birthday. Rock thanked everyone and said he loves them…if you smell what the Rock is cooking. Streamers were sent down from the rafters as his music played. Balloons followed that. Confetti cannons then went off too. Hey, there’s some fireworks! Wow. Rock posed on the turnbuckles to close the show.


(edited by geemoney on 2.5.11 2328)
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Since: 2.1.02
From: MD, USA

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#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.44
So, Kong is Jason Voorhees and Kelly Kelly is the virginal girl who gets spared early on and will lead the babyface comeback down the road? I do look forward to Kong squashing the Bellas simultaneously.

Of all the birthday wishes, I expected to see Vin Diesel. And Rocky Johnson. Too bad we didn't get a NOD reunion with Ron Simmons, D-Lo and Mark Henry.

I think that may have been the start of the Miz face turn.

I hate to say that I can believe Cena keeping the belt until he faces Rock at Wrestlemania.

Highlight of the night: Jim Ross saying "catch as catch can." I guess he didn't get the memo.

---

at least we didn't see the clip of Stephanie comparing 9/11 to vince's steroid trial.



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ekedolphin
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Since: 12.1.02
From: Indianapolis, IN; now residing in Suffolk, VA

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#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.06
I didn't mind Cena retaining, but I was a little irritated that the referee overturned the call on circumstantial evidence. It's not like Miz had used a chair and there was a big Cena's-head-shaped dent in it. He could have at least looked at the instant replay.

WWE's doing an excellent job of making me want to see John Morrison kick the hell out of R-Truth. But I wouldn't be surprised if Morrison sells this injury for a few months.

I was on WWE.com's Live Chat for this one, as I've made a habit of doing ever since The Rock first came back. Here are my posts that made it through the moderators.

9:18: Why do we always trust Michael Cole to correctly read the GM's pronouncements, anyway?
9:34: (re: R-Truth's being pulled from John Morrison by the refs; it would turn out to be temporary) Oh, NOW the referees intervene?!?! Where were they two weeks ago?!
9:43: (re: Kharma) Good God, she CAN'T be all that fast. Run away before she kicks your head in.
9:45: She destroyed Maryse and then LEFT KELLY ALONE?!
10:49: (re: Will Cena and Rock have a confrontation?) Won that bet.
11:11: (re: Rock's birthday celebration) Waiting for the other shoe to drop anytime now. (Surprisingly, it didn't.)



"Nobody ever came out and said, 'Please pass a law so I can be forced to stop doing something I shouldn't be doing,' no, it's always 'Please pass a law to force them to stop doing something that I don't like.'"
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dwaters
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Since: 16.10.02
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#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.38
Somebody need to teach JR the meaning of the word "literally".

They were not literally in the Rock's backyard and he did not literally lower the boom.

Great as he is, that was just too much Rock for one show.

EDIT:
There will never be an in-ring celebratation that will match the Mick Foley hosted “This Is Your Life, Rock”. Classic.
He crapped all over each guest, including an old girlfriend "You never let The Rock get past second base!"



(edited by dwaters on 2.5.11 2056)
Hokienautic
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Since: 2.1.02
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#5 Posted on
Damn. I was convinced they would have brought out Lilian Garcia to sing Happy Birthday. Ah well.
ekedolphin
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Since: 12.1.02
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#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.06
    Originally posted by dwaters
    Somebody need to teach JR the meaning of the word "literally".

    They were not literally in the Rock's backyard and he did not literally lower the boom.



To make it worse, a quick Google search for the definition of the phrase "lower the boom" shows a translation of "to suddenly stop someone from doing something you don't approve of". Which doesn't make any sense in the context it was used.



"Nobody ever came out and said, 'Please pass a law so I can be forced to stop doing something I shouldn't be doing,' no, it's always 'Please pass a law to force them to stop doing something that I don't like.'"
--Manny Garcia, The Moon is a Harsh Mistress by Robert A. Heinlein

Fan of the Indianapolis Colts (Super Bowl XLI Champions), Indiana Pacers and Washington Nationals

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Mr Shh
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#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.07
At the top of the show, Cole referred to Miz as the "self-proclaimed most must see WWE Champion in history." Why was he so objective there?

Miz likes to be wined and dined before he gets fucked. How the hell does the ref have that kind of authority? Riley grabbed the belt and handed it to Miz before the ref had a chance to - that's all they had to say. And where was the GM in all that?

(edited by Mr Shh on 2.5.11 2354)


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#8 Posted on | Instant Rating: 9.84
This show suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucked



AWArulz
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Since: 28.1.02
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#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.08
Those who watched (I am on the road, with the lovely Lodgenet, sans USA network), did you see a young rookie african-american wrestler on the show? I believe he currently has short braids or dreads. His real name is Michael Kelly and wrestled in high school with my son and was supposedly making an appearance on Raw.

I was thinking, entourage for Pitball?

anyone notice a guy like that? I'll see it Saturday night sometime.



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Since: 12.12.01
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#10 Posted on | Instant Rating: 9.01
It would've been worth it to have bin Laden still be at large if we could've avoided that cringetastic show-opening video.

Rock drank water (secretly)! Rock to be replaced in Wrestlemania main event by Morrison.

The presentation of Kharma and the reaction by the girls to her is fantastic.

Cena/Miz was twice as good as their WM match.
InVerse
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Since: 26.8.02

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#11 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.57
    Originally posted by dwaters
    Somebody need to teach JR the meaning of the word "literally".


Someone did. That someone was Gorilla Monsoon.


    Originally posted by ekedolphin
    To make it worse, a quick Google search for the definition of the phrase "lower the boom" shows a translation of "to suddenly stop someone from doing something you don't approve of". Which doesn't make any sense in the context it was used.


John Cena was faring well in his match against The Miz. Alex Riley disapproved of that and suddenly stopped him from doing so with a clothesline. It makes perfect sense, even if you can't be bothered to move on to the second Google hit in which you could learn that 'lower the boom' is also common slang for a knock out blow.
ekedolphin
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Since: 12.1.02
From: Indianapolis, IN; now residing in Suffolk, VA

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#12 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.06
    Originally posted by InVerse
      Originally posted by dwaters
      Somebody need to teach JR the meaning of the word "literally".


    Someone did. That someone was Gorilla Monsoon.


      Originally posted by ekedolphin
      To make it worse, a quick Google search for the definition of the phrase "lower the boom" shows a translation of "to suddenly stop someone from doing something you don't approve of". Which doesn't make any sense in the context it was used.


    John Cena was faring well in his match against The Miz. Alex Riley disapproved of that and suddenly stopped him from doing so with a clothesline. It makes perfect sense, even if you can't be bothered to move on to the second Google hit in which you could learn that 'lower the boom' is also common slang for a knock out blow.


Ohhhh. Then I misremembered (or didn't remember at all) the situation in which JR said it.

AWArulz, sorry but I didn't see anyone like that. Everyone who made an in-ring appearance was a known quantity. Unless he was in the background at The Rock's birthday party or something.



"Nobody ever came out and said, 'Please pass a law so I can be forced to stop doing something I shouldn't be doing,' no, it's always 'Please pass a law to force them to stop doing something that I don't like.'"
--Manny Garcia, The Moon is a Harsh Mistress by Robert A. Heinlein

Fan of the Indianapolis Colts (Super Bowl XLI Champions), Indiana Pacers and Washington Nationals

Certified RFMC Member-- Ask To See My Credentials!

Co-Winner of Time's Person of the Year Award, 2006

TheOldMan
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Since: 13.2.03
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#13 Posted on
    Originally posted by Hokienautic
    Damn. I was convinced they would have brought out Lilian Garcia to sing Happy Birthday. Ah well.


I can't believe they went to all the trouble of bringing Lilian in, and didn't work in a backstage meeting with an awkward reference to the People's strudel. For old times' sake.

And you mean a member of the WWE tag champions gets a singles match on Raw the week after the draft.. and it's the one who DIDN'T get drafted to Raw?? Of course. I guess it's somewhat mitigated because Kane might be the only man on the active roster who can get a two-minute match out of Ryan without a serious injury.

(Edit: Did anyone hear what happened to the Coach making an appearance?)

(edited by TheOldMan on 2.5.11 2335)


CxMorgado
Boudin rouge








Since: 21.1.02
From: Boston MA is the rippen'ist town...

Since last post: 271 days
Last activity: 7 hours
#14 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.00
This was a terrible show. And that opening video package gave me super douche chills.

Kharma was great. It may be too soon for this kind of hypothesizing, but the fact she took out heels both times she struck strikes me as more than coincidental, especially given the choice of name. Just something I came up with ponder while the rest of the show was making me miserable.

(edited by CxMorgado on 3.5.11 0043)


http://wrestling.insidepulse.com/​author/​christophermorgado/​
www.comicnoize.com
saturn93
Pickled pork








Since: 21.4.03
From: Naperville, IL

Since last post: 37 days
Last activity: 3 hours
#15 Posted on
It felt like I was watching two different WWE programs tonight. For most of the first hour, it felt like TNA. By the time the top of the hour came up, it was enjoyable.

My thoughts:

- Lillian, how we missed you. Always sounding great!!!

- The first Rock part after a while just dragged on and on.

- At least the Cole/Lawler storyline got put on the shelf...for a few days. Thanks Rock!

- If it would have been up to me, I want the new R-Truth in a title match next week. He sure has vaulted into the top heel for now, until those that just arrived get settled into storylines.

- I love Ron Simmons. Just say the word and get your check. I knew he was going to show up when Santino/Hornswoggle/Khali dressed up. He could have said his line for the entire first hour.

- Pretty good Miz/Cena match, and I like the tease with Miz and Riley pushing a little, then Cena has to ruin it by clotheslining both of them.

- Mae Young...don't need any words.

- OK, we get new opponents for Kane and Big Show, but it's the same situation, with Mason Ryan as Ezekiel Jackson, CM Punk as Wade Barrett, and Otunga/McGillicutty as Slater/Gabriel. WHEE!!!

- Outstanding last segment.

- Is it me, or was this the first time in wrestling history that a party did not end up in a food fight/brawl?

I can't wait to pass that building on my to the Port of Miami in a couple of weeks when I'm on vacation.
It's False
Scrapple








Since: 20.6.02
From: I am the Tag Team Champions!

Since last post: 11 hours
Last activity: 11 hours
#16 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.96
I FFWD'd through the dead spots on the DVR and was done in less than an hour. Yikes!

I certainly don't remember Kharma playing her character that well in TNA. In addition to being a monster, she does "scary" extremely well. I'm sure the chimps running TNA are still patting themselves on the back for turfing her in favor of Bubba The Love Sponge. And can someone please teach Kelly how to convey fear? It looked like she was staring blankly into the camera.

Waste of an opening segment and waste of a closing segment. Not much else to really say beyond that, except I watched Cole getting his ass kicked on a loop.

Man, I'm glad we had the draft so they could make fresh feuds like Rey Mysterio and Alberto Del Rio!

They're sure going to give it the old college try with Mason Ryan. If he can do a ten-minute match without embarrassing himself, he'll be in a world title program by the end of the year.

(edited by It's False on 2.5.11 2222)

Big Bad
Scrapple








Since: 4.1.02
From: Dorchester, Ontario

Since last post: 2 days
Last activity: 8 hours
#17 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.66
Just a terrible edition of Raw. So much needless talking, so many needless celebrity cameos, so little wrestling and it all led up to the big climax of.....a video package about the Rock. It's sad to see how pathetic Vince is about his need to run an 'entertainment' show that he will literally throw a guy a shoot birthday party just as a thank-you.



"It breaks your heart. It is designed to break your heart. The game begins in the spring, when everything else begins again, and it blossoms in the summer, filling the afternoons and evenings, and then as soon as the chill rains come, it stops and leaves you to face the fall alone." --- Bart Giamatti, on baseball
odessasteps
Scrapple








Since: 2.1.02
From: MD, USA

Since last post: 95 days
Last activity: 62 days
#18 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.44

I bet they figure that the people who watch RAW don't watch Smackdown, so to them, Rey/Dos is a new feud.



Mark Coale
Odessa Steps Magazine
ISSUE FOUR - OCTOBER 2009
Hogan's My Dad
Andouille








Since: 8.6.02
From: Canada

Since last post: 1 day
Last activity: 1 day
#19 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.73

I love it. Obama is somehow not even pictured, heard, or mentioned in the opening seg even though he presided over Bin Laden's killing, we get a love note to George W, and then a love note to WWE, for it was the heroic WWE that was the first to return to normal life after 9/11 (which they did AGAIN with their Did You Know?). Too bad we couldn't get a replay of Steph's comments comparing that attack to Vince getting indicted, which was in about as good taste as most of this dogshit (as mentioned by Odessa). Vince's worldview, and his insistence on hammering it into the throats of anyone who comes anywhere near this product, really makes me want to puke sometimes.

I think Pitbull should have a match against Ricardo Rodriguez, with the winner getting to announce for Del Rio. I like shit-talk in Spanish.

Boy, Truth and Kharma have certainly filled the "angry black people" quota for RAW. I thought I was watching Smokey Mountain. I'm happy to see they saved the Kelly-Kelly squash. She should narrowly avoid that beatdown for weeks.

I realize that mainstream pub trumps all in WWE, but why air Kimmel if he's gonna take a shot at wrestling? Tell him to fuck off and come back when he's funny.

Santino looked like Safari Joe from Thundercats. Yes, high fives to my 80s brethren who remember that. But Khali in a dress? Remember when they used to book Giants seriously? Oh, and Faarooq should have given Rock a portrait of Faarooq, for historical reasons.

I've been critical of Miz in recent months on this forum, but I'm not too small to admit he had a fantastic match tonight, just a straight wrestling match that was easy to buy into, had a hot crowd, and was brilliantly paced and dramatically executed. To me, this is the first time he really and truly belonged in there in the Main Event, especially with the FU kickout. Now let's see them keep him this strong.

ADR illustrates the difference between a Mexican and a Chicano. Kind of edgy; I liked it. Good tag, I'd like to see the Rey/Kofi combo more often.

Mason Ryan is almost as orange as he is green! Bwhaha zing!

Y'know, as much as I love Rock, seeing him in this environment makes me think WWE will diminish his mystique more than his mystque will enhance the current WWE. Also, was I the only expecting a VKM swerve? That was so...sober.



(edited by Hogan's My Dad on 2.5.11 2307)


Quiet, Or Papa Spank!
yamcharulez
Bauerwurst








Since: 6.1.02
From: chicago

Since last post: 140 days
Last activity: 2 hours
#20 Posted on
I love how on raw they showed a video asking people to watch smackdown to see who has the world tittle to cut to Christian holding the world tittle.



Dont say its not worth it, when you can sleep with no fear, that kind of time is worth any thing.- FFX
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I'll play, sure. Cena retains. Edge retains sneakily. Batista wins despite being dumb and slow. Kozlov beats the shit out of Matt Hardy. Henry wins. Punk wins.
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