Why is it called "Preperation H"? I mean, what are you preparing for? Think about THAT. "The Medallion" - no. Really, the world is tired of wuxia (wire-fu).
Why won't they wake up? I mean, it's the same time as every week. It's time for Raw, live from Grand Rapids, MI, and a Fashion Report, too!
Jericho, lounging in th ring, in a black Hilight-Reel tshirt and red tights, kicking-of the show with the Hilight Reel. The ramp is camera-right this week. jericho cuts a promo pimping the Elimination Chamber. Shawn, in black tshirt with white radiant cross and blue jeans, is this week's guest, saying a whole ONE word ("Well"). Evolution: HHH, in red shirt and black slacks with the World Heavyweight Title over his shoulder, Randy, in blue silk shirt and black slacks, and Flair, in brown sportscoat with yellow shirt and grey slacks, are the Special Guest Hosts. HHH just wants to cut a promo, but Shawn has to get all violent. And...and...and...Nash (eventually) gets to the ring. Then GOldberg does stuff. Only 11 jam-packed minutes.
In the back, Stacie and Test work on their communication skills.
Puppies, in black latex bellbottoms, black v-neck and sparkly black trenchcoat, with a backstage intefrview, vs. (the lovely and talented) Molly, in black top with turquoise strap and balck tights, wearing the Women's Title. Gail, in white, comes down to get her ass kicked, and interfere in the match. DQ. An average match.
In the back, Evolution (look - primary colors!) meet with Austin (and his LITE beer). He books a match - Randy vs. Goldberg, with Austin as "Special Enforcer".
Shane, in an untucked grey shirt (top two buttons undone) and slightly-worn blue jeans, talks smack about Bisch and Kane (easy to do when they're not in the arena). Ooo, gasoline.
In the back, Golddust and Lance engage in hijinx.
Test, in balck undies with redflames vs. Adbreak vs. Steiner, in black "Freakzilla" tights, with Stacie, in red top and black skirt with choker. Test sells a blown-knee, then (minutes later) gets the Big Boot. Yeah, Stacie's a slut. Horrible match.
La Resistance, in blue sparlky coats, black berets with yellow trim and black "La Resistance" undies, with French Flag, talk smack with a local serviceman. Then the Dudlyes, Bubba in "Dudleyville 3D" jersey and black warmups, and DVon, in sleeveless black "Dudley Boyz 3D" tshirt and orange/white camo pants, with a USA flag, come out to chant and hang with the serviceman. Airforce? Wait - the "serviceman" turns on the Dudleys! Wow, I bit.
In the back, Jericho primps.
Kane/Linda FOOTAGE!. Now she's looking at internet porn. SHeesh - she NEEDS you, Vince.
Jericho, already in the ring, with a barber at ringside, in the same red tights, vs. Nash, in black singlet with silver "Nash" plate and black leather pants. Nash is deliberate, and Jericho bumps a lot. But once Jericho goes to the knee, we get more back-and-forth action. Good match, but the brass-knuckes just sucked the air out of my sails.
Earlier today, Mr. Snuglot was in trouble. But Rosie, in neon green/purple shorts, navy-blue "Super Hero In Training" tshirt, orange shirt and tights, with purple mask, saves the cat. Then Hurricane, in in green "H" cape, and black/green "H" suit, gets all comic-booky on the little girl. Meanwhile, Rosie KILLS Mr. Snuglot! PETA is pissed, but I'm laughing so hard.
Mack, in unzipped black "Back the Mack" hooded shirt and black undies, with Teddy, in WHITE suit with white shirt, vs. Rosie, in same with Hurricane, in same. An average match.
King, in gold fish-scale sparkly shirt, and JR, in black "WW" shirt and black hat, have Linda/Kane FOOTAGE!, again. Here's LInda, in white shirt with horizontal black/green stripes (the kind your 50-something mother would wear), sitting in a comfy chair. Get the damn door! Oh, wait, Bisch, in black leather jacket, let himself in. He really wants to give it to her.
Apparently nothing happened during the adbreak. Really, Bisch just wants to please her, and hurt Shane for buying WCW out from under him. Much detail about how Bisch will hurt Shane. Oh, and then we get a simulated rape scene. Fuck you, WWE writers.
During the break, Shane is righteously pissed-off. And, for once, the car doesn't stall ('cuz he's channelling some powerful vengeance).
Rob, in black singlet with skeletal white dragon perched on "RVD" vs. Christian!, in black tights with gold "C"s on gold/purple crests. A few minutes in, Kane, in same as always, clobbers RVD and carries him off. Um, no contest? Christian! by countout? Too bad Nick Patrick was KO'ed. Still, a good match while it lasted.
In the back, Stacie shakes it for Stevie, Rico, and Test. Wait - Rico? And where are Miss Jackie and Victoria?
Also in the back, Kane wakes up Rob (now handcuffed to a pole) with a gasoline shower. Kane yells his hate for Rob, but won't set him on fire. 'Cuz Kane does what HE wants.
Austin, in black "F*CK FEAR/Drink Beer" tshirt, jean shorts, and RED kneebraces, posing at the corners, vs. Adbreak vs. Randy, in black "Randy" undies with blue bolts (HHH and Flair joining on commentary) vs. Goldberg (he gets a lockerroom this week) in black/white undies with white trim and white barbedwire butt. Okay match, but then Austin gets involved and that just f's it up. Post-match, HHH poses, Nash s-l-o-w-l-y comes through the crowd to powerbomb Goldberg, Shawn hits sweet chin music on HHH, and Jericho nails Shawn with a chair. Way to book-end the show with hype for the most important match on the card.
Overall: A good show, except for ONE segment. Appropriate hype for the Elimination Chamber, focusing on the everyman-for-himself nature. Also a good segment leading into the Kane/RVD match (too little too late, though?).
BUT.... Rape, yeah, that'll be a good idea. Remember how everyone got pissed about the necrophilia thing? Well I'm getting even more pissed about this. Fuck you. Fuck you right up the ass. I wish I was in Canada so TSN could've edited this shit out and it wouldn't have stunk-up the show. Way to drag the product down into the gutter.
Probably the best of the show for me was the RVD/Kane promo, even if Kane proved no better at lighting matches than Goldberg at starting cars, or Hogan starting bikes. That was otherwise pretty well done. The sexual harassment of women, however, does not work for me, and we get two separate storylines of it, let alone when one of said segments has one of the worst actresses on television.
The Main was a decent setup for the Elimination Chamber match, as formula as that setup has become.
Linda needs an interior decorator. And a pop-up blocker. And a more helpful cameraman. Actually, RVD could use a more helpful cameraman too.
I realize the Hurricane/Rosey segment was supposed to be stupid, but that was new depths of stupidity.
Watching Jericho rub Nash’s frizzy hair in his face had to be one of the grossest things I have ever seen on WWE television.
Even if Kane’s entrance plays, you would think RVD had the time to make the pin before Kane could actually get down the ramp.
Anybody else notice that, when Christian is in motion, his pants look like they say “WCW”?
Why does Rico want to see Stacy dance?
Is it foresight that Triple H called it the “Evolution Chamber”?
Originally posted by Mr Heel IIEven if Kane’s entrance plays, you would think RVD had the time to make the pin before Kane could actually get down the ramp.
Well, seeing as how the referee was out cold, I'm pretty sure RVD couldn't have pinned him. And, if I may, would somebody PLEASE tell JR that the Slop Drop is not the Unprettier! Every time Christian goes for the Unprettier nobody says anything, but then when he does the inverted DDT, it's the Unprettier! ARGH!
Pretty good show for me.
(edited by gugs on 18.8.03 2351) Sometimes I ask myself why I watch WWE after all the crap it's given me. HLA, necro, HHH, and so on. And then it hits me. That one simple phrase that can be modified and used for anything that gets you down, yet makes you keep coming back.
Every episode has the potential to be the best one ever, and I'll be damned if I'm going to miss it after sitting through this shit.
And they say professional wrestling demeans women. Pshaw!
I've come to realize that lately RAW is almost entirely carried by Chris Jericho, who gets a lot of screen time for somebody who holds no belt and might never do so. It seems like lately he always has at least one interview segment and one match every week, plus maybe a run-in or two.
If it were anybody else, this would be a complaint. Fortunately, I love Chris Jericho. That and I'm amazed that he gets so much screen time and is still consistently entertaining the whole time. Did anybody else laugh really, really hard at how in-depth his celebration was with that hair? "Hey, Nash! Do you like my hat? It's made out of YOUR HAIR! Would you like to join me for dinner? I think I'll have YOUR HAIR! Mmm numm numm numm!"
Even at the end of the show, he pops up and we close with "HEY NASH! SUNDAY! YOU'RE BALD! AND I'M CHAMP!" and he's just this one guy singlehandedly making the show as good as he can possibly make it and doing everything he can to just almost make up for tonight's show setting the perception of women in wrestling lower than it's ever been before.
That may have been the best match Kevin Nash has had in a long time, too. And he actually looked pretty cool with his hair out and waving around like that, although occasionally with the wrong camera angle he did look like a grizzled Old Man Winter or something.
RIP Mr. Snugglelot; may he (or she, I think the girl said -- in which case, weird name) be remembered fondly as one of the rare times Jerry Lawler managed to come out of the blue and entertain me. We had the cat-killin' scene, and it was good, then Rodney Mack is coming out and JR's babbling about such-and-such or whatever, and then just as soon as he's done Jerry puts on this tiny little frightened voice and says "...where's Mr. Snugglelot?" and I have a hearty laugh.
Jim Ross, on the other hand, I want gone. Forever this time. Goldberg hits the Jackhammer on Randy Orton and there's Good Ol' JR, screaming in full overblown hyperbole mode, yelling at the top of his lungs "GOLDBERG! HE HITS THE JACKKNIFE!" Oi.
Was anybody else legitimately amazed and a little bit scared by the pop Rosey got when he won? That was just nutty, yo.
And, also: TWOOOO~! I was worried that the crowd wasn't going to keep it up, but they heated up pretty substantially by the time the show was done.
The first 20 minutes of the show was a train wreck.
The Evolution Chamber??? WTF???
Nash and that yellow hair?? errr??? He blows too.
But there were some bright spots. Kane is god. He made the entire show for me. Although having a tough time with lighting the matches he still pulled it off. In a really non-believable story line, he makes it believable.
What a spear on Orton. Jeebus...
Rosey cracks me up.
This sunday it is going to be a clusterfuck in that chamber....argh....
"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon. Need I say more?"
I don't see why y'alls hatin'. Personally, I thought this was the best RAW I've seen in three weeks. Certainly better than last week's, which blew sour monkey balls. For everyone bitching about degrading women ... for fuck's sake people, GET A LIFE!!! It's A TV SHOW! The Linda/Bischoff scene was creepy, it was disturbing, and it built heat for the PPV. Everyone was complaining about how there's no reasoning behind the mutual hatred of Shane and Bischoff; I think Bischoff's rant and assault on Linda gave it a HELL of a lot of motivation. If only Bischoff was ANYONE else, I'd be looking forward to the match (two non-wrestlers still don't do it for me). And hell, if Linda thought it was degrading, do you think she would've done it? What would Vince do if she didn't, de-push her? Vince obviously didn't see it the way you did, and it's HIS WIFE, so I honestly don't see your moral grounds here.
Jericho actually got a good match out of Nash, though I admit that his delight in rubbing himself with Nash's rug was tres nasty.
Rosey continues to impress me like crazy. He is, indeed, the S.H.I.T. Wonder whose idea it was to make him Hurricane's sidekick?
I, too, wish to know what the hell happened to Lance Storm.
Test had me really worried, and I was shocked as hell when it was a fake. Heel Test is great, as long as he has Steiner and Stacy to play off of. Against those non-related to his gimmick, he still kinda falls flat.
Kane was one scary mofo, even with his inability to light matches. At least it gave them plenty of time to zoom in on RVD's terror and pain (hey, say what you will about the man, but he acted pretty damn well tonight IMO).
Loved the clusterfuck ending. Hey, he really is Kevin Test now! Hope we see Sunday what we saw tonight; everyone else down, and Jericho holding the title (yeah, Nash was standing too, but you get the point.)
Originally posted by ScreamingHeadGuy Fuck you. Fuck you right up the ass. I wish I was in Canada so TSN could've edited this shit out and it wouldn't have stunk-up the show.
No such luck as far as I know. To be fair, I changed the station once they came back from commercial and I realized that they weren't going to say "You won't believe what happened when we went off the air for commercials", but instead just kinda had Eric and Linda stand in place for 2 minutes I guess before continuing. As far as I know, they aired the whole thing up here, or at least enough where he was forcing himself on her pretty badly and I changed the tv to watch old "Angel" episodes.
I also hated the S.H.I.T. segment. I mean, it could have been done great, and been something we'd never forget, but instead the WWE uses the same type of subtlety (sp) that I've come to expect from them by jumping the cat volume up to 100dB and zooming in on an extreme closeup of Rosie halfway through. Can you imagine how funny that would have been if the cat had only been barely audible, and the camera left Rosie in the background for us to 'notice' as the skit went on? THAT'S the kind of stuff that keeps the company in the shitter right now. They used to NAIL stuff like that without trying.
ps. If I were Linda, I would fire Eric for the rape, and also the cameraman and sound guy for standing there filming and not helping her.
Wrestling exists in the eternal present. What is, has always been, and when it no longer is, it never was. It has no past and no future, and sometimes even today is in question. - Madame Manga
Click Here (welovetheiraqiinformationminister.com)
I am ill. I had to sit throught Linda while waiting for the Lance payoff. If Easy E actually bangs her then we are talking Katie Vick all over again. The woman is a fucking zombie that must have been involved in the Vince/Satan pact of '96.
Will Lance still be in the Grand Rapids ladies room while everyone else is at SummerSlam?
i don't know if anybody else noticed this, but tonight was the night of surprises for my roomate and i.
1. the referee puts up the "X" symbol after Test falls down. and then on the way out Test big boots and pins steiner. we were shocked for at least a good 30 seconds going "what the hell?"
2. nash powerbombs jericho near the end of the match and hebner comes *this* close to putting down the three count right before jericho puts his foot on the ropes. we (didn't read the post about nash's movie) and thought that that was the finish, and there was no way jericho was kicking out of that. nice move on his part =D
3. when rvd dove through the ropes and kane plastered him in the face with the chairshot. thought for sure it was going to be some version of the vandaminator instead.
4. nice camera work at the end as shawn michael's leg just flies out of nowhere to k.o. triple h midway through his pose. maybe we're naive, but we thought for sure it would end *again* with triple h dominant and defiant.
Does anybody monitor the wienerboard to see how lightly you guys are treating the issue of rape and how the WWE seems to think this is what we want to see?
First of all, if the implication of rape on a WWE show (given that the WWE "doesn't do rape") isn't enough to piss you off and get you going on a tantrum about Vince's morals, you obviously haven't had many girlfriends, or even one.
The reason is because I haven't dated a woman who didn't have at least one experience with rape or been attacked by a man she trusted. It's more common than you think. It's enough to make you cry, but I guess that's not allowed with wrestling fans on the wienerboard. Insert wise-ass comment here.
In case you don't know, rape is unwanted sexual contact and is often traumatic and scarring both mentally and physically.
But it's typical of male wrestling fans in their late teens or early twenties to believe rape is not a big deal. The number of posters who want us all to "lighten up" about the Bischoff/McMahon angle attests to that.
The WWE is 100% wrong to write that kind of thing into their storylines because since it all boils down to an athletic exhibition, there are dozens of other ways you can build heat for a match that doesn't alienate 50% or more of your potential audience.
By 50% or more of the audience, I'm talking about women viewers, and men who know rape is a serious issue. They will turn off Raw if they see what transpired between Linda and Bischoff tonight, and apparently have been for the past two years. I doubt the numbers for tonight's show will surpass the 3.8-4.2 range.
Raw's numbers once peaked in the 6's and the 8's. Now, drawing half that, anything above 4 is considered a triumph. That's very telling considering the monopoly was supposed to improve the product. The WWE had a glut of talent to throw out on every show and now we're seeing A-Train vs. Stephanie and Randy Orton vs. Goldberg.
If Bill O'Reilly ever gets his seamy claws into the WWE's product, watch out. I hate the guy, but I almost wish I could bring the strip-club-level sleaziness of the WWE product to his attention, and reveal at the same time how stupid the wieners look trying to tell us putting rape on Raw isn't a big deal.
The public backlash against the WWE would be huge if the general public knew about Vince's disgusting treatment of women, both on Raw and on Smackdown, and both workers and members of his own family, and how he trots it out as quasi-family-entertainment.
If people want to watch a show about serious stuff like rape and murder there's always Law and Order Special Victims Unit and other tastefully-done shows.
And what kind of a person looks to the WWE for rape angles in the first place?
Remember the Katie Vick angle and how the WWE justified it as just a promotion for the reruns of CSI? That really drew a lot of money and sold a lot of tickets, no? It was really tastefully done with A+ production values, no? It really convinced the wrestling audience to tune in to CSI and make it a success in it's time slot, no? Didn't think so. Long live Six Feet Under and it's morose yet quality treatment of the same stuff the WWE can't touch with a ten foot pole.
The Attitude era is over. The shock value of Crash TV has ended. The whole thing about how this is just "real life and rape happens in real life" doesn't cut it. This is wrestling, not real life. When I see a dozen "Don't try this at home" PSA's I can't believe someone would try to justify putting a rape angle on because "it's real life." When they put on that PSA, they are admitting the whole thing is a work, and when it comes to being a work, they don't have to do it! MLB, the NHL or the NFL don't try to deter kids from playing sports at home, and god help them if they ever tried!
I care about seeing wrestling on TV but this whole rape thing among other botched storylines and car wreck episodes of Raw and Smackdown makes it difficult wrestling has much of a future on cable networks. I am a diehard fan, and even though at times I don't like it I'll always love it. That's why anybody who tells me "love it or leave it" or "just don't watch it" can go to hell. I don't need your cynicism or your negativity. I'll post a detailed rundown of my criticisms of the WWE product later, I don't care if you read it or not. These are criticisms from the heart and the brain, not from some cynical part of my psyche out for revenge. I wouldn't put the time and effort into my essay that I did if I didn't love wrestling.
Rape is serious, people, and the WWE doesn't have to script it, and are shooting themselves in the ass yet again by using it in a storyline, even if it is just "implied."
Rape being "implied" isn't going to stop most people from changing the channel.
The argument of "Vince isn't racist, he stereotypes everyone!" isn't exactly a classic rejoinder. I think what we wrestling fans hate the most about Phil Mushnick is that most of the time, he's absolutely right.