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The W - Pro Wrestling - RAW #721, 3/19/07
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geemoney
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Since: 26.1.03
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#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.63
TONIGHT: Will Vince respond to the shove heard ‘round the sports entertainment industry? PLUS: It’s WrestleMania Reversal night! HBK takes on JBL in his return to the ring and John Cena faces Chris Benoit! WWE.com also says ECW Champ Lashley will take the “Masterlock Challenge.” I bet he doesn’t break it AND doesn’t lose!

-“In memory of Arnold Skaaland: 1925-2007"

-WWE Open.

-RAW Open.

-JR welcomes us to the Conseco Fieldhouse in Indianapolis, Indiana on the road to Wrestlemania. The WM Reversal matches are previewed by the announcers. DX’s music hits and we kick things off with a match!

(1) Shawn Michaels vs. JBL
JBL comes out with his full intro, limo and all. Lillian Garcia, in case you missed it, was injured in a skiing accident (nothing too serious- knee injury) and isn’t at RAW- Justin Roberts is YOUR ring announcer. Wait, JBL is in his suit and he’s got a mic. The Indianans greet him with “you suck.” No one, apparently, tells JBL what to do and when to do it. He wants to come out of retirement by HIS rules, in HIS town of NYC. JBL ain’t wrestling tonight, and says Shawn will get his at WM from John Cena. They’re late to censor “egotistical prick,” and why they wanted to censor that is beyond me. This is going on a little longer than it should, I think. But Vince sure loves that JBL! HBK makes JBL (I love the shorthand) sick. Like a true gentlemen debater, he hands the mic to HBK for a rebuttal. Shawn counters JBL’s assertions. HBK says he will beat Cena at WM, which is greeted by some boos. HBK, in the middle of his diatribe, superkicks Layfield. I guess this segment gets over the “anywhere, anytime” element of Shawn’s superkick, as in it can happen to Cena at any moment. HBK takes JBL’s hat and wears it to the back.

[Break]

-The Hair vs. Hair match is discussed and we are shown the Tale of the Tape once again. It’s a new one though.

-Edge is perusing the WWE Magazine backstage when Randy Orton confronts him, angrily. Edge claims he was kicked out of ringside on accident. Apparently, there’s a last-chance battle royal for a spot in the MITB match tonight, and it’s for EDGE’S spot. Orton convinced Mr. McMahon to make that match. However, Edge will have a chance to get his spot back, as he’s one of the guys in the battle royal. Orton was better in this segment than he was last week. Edge was good as always.

-Chris Masters is in the ring for the Masterlock challenge. I notice JR isn’t even saying it hasn’t “officially” been broken, he just says it hasn’t been broken now. A nice video of those who HAVEN’T broken the challenge is shown. The announcers and Masters apparently don’t read WWE.com, because they had no idea who the participant was going to be. Masters is a little hesitant to put the move on as Lashley waits patiently. Masters slaps him and we get a return slap from Lashley. Back in the chair is Bobby, and Masters has it locked in. The champ is down to one knee and the crowd is behind him. He’s back up to a vertical base and with one giant tug, he breaks it!! Wow, how anti-climactic. Masters is pissed. I thought for sure they’d wait for the break at WM. If WWE and Hogan were still talking, he would’ve been a good one to make a quick WM appearance and break the hold. But I guess it shouldn’t be surprised that on his way to being pushed to the moon, Lashley breaks the Masterlock. I hear he brings Eddie Guerrero back from the dead next week.

[Break]

-A video of Ashley’s Playboy shoot is shown.

-“Moments ago...,” Lashley breaks the Masterlock.

-Backstage, Lashley runs into Vince McMahon, who’s doing the slow, mocking clap. He is flanked by Coach and a team of security. McMahon promises that Umaga will break Lashley at WM. Vince gives Lashley the night off, as someone has thrown his gear into the parking lot (but who?!?!). As Lashley walks off with security, Vince and Coach run into Maria. Then they LITERALLY run into Eugene, who spills some sort of liquid (coffee, I think) on Vince’s suit. McMahon tells Coach to get him Umaga, presumably to destroy Eugene. Ron Simmons walks up to Vince, takes a gander at his tie, and says, “Damn!”

-Tonight, a battle royal for the final spot in the MITB Ladder Match.

-JR and King send their condolences and say a few words about the late Arnold Skaaland. And now we get a video package on him. Are they only doing video packages on HOF’ers who die, or just older wrestlers who die (you wouldn’t want to do it for every YOUNG wrestler who dies)?

[break]

(1) Last Chance Battle Royal for a spot in the MITB Ladder Match
We’ve got Viscera, Kenny Dykstra, Ric Flair, Super Crazy, Charlie Haas, Shelton Benjamin, Val Venis, Johnny Nitro, Carlito and Edge. My money is on Vis. Can he even climb the ladder? The participants all gang up on my pick. He gets tossed by everyone at :40. Carlito tries to get Brazy over while Edge takes a powder on the outside. He’s holding his knee. TWGTT pair up on Nitro. Kenny attempts to throw Val over. Nitro hangs on as he’s almost tossed. Edge is still on the outside. Flair FINALLY goes after Kenny with some chops. Super Crazy is tossed at 3:05 after he tried a high-risk move on Haas and Benjamin. We’ll be back!

[break]

Back live, and we’re down to six. During the break, Nitro dropkicked Venis out and Haas was pushed out by Carlito. Shelton and Flair are in one corner while Edge is getting treated at ringside by a trainer and EMT. Kenny hammers away on Carlito. Carlito is on the apron now, he tries to climb back in via the turnbuckle, but Shelton hops up to meet him and is then pushed out by Flair at 8:13. Nitro sticks the boot to Carlito in the corner. Kenny is chopped out by Flair at 8:50, and Nitro is tossed at 9:00. Flair and Carlito are left in the ring (and Edge on the outside). Springboard back elbow finds the mark for CCC. Flair is clotheslined over but lands on the apron and a thumb to Carlito’s eye allows him to come back in. Flair literally walks into an elbow in the corner from Carlito, and Flair must be gassed. Flair tosses Carlito at 10:38 and the bell rings. As he celebrates, Edge comes back in and tosses him out (after an aborted attempt).

Winner: Edge, by throwing out Flair at 10:56

-They replay Edge coming up lame during the match, then tossing the Nature Boy.

-Tonight, we get a first look at Steve Austin’s new movie, “The Condemned.”

-“No Chance” brings out Vince McMahon for a visit. Vince (and to a lesser extent, Coach) directs his security, and they bring the barber chair and accessories to ringside. By sheer coincidence I’m sure, Eugene/Umaga is next!

[break]

(2) Umaga vs. Eugene
Eugene is impressed by the colorful, moving barber pole. Umaga starts things before the bell by knocking Eugene off the apron, then throwing him into the stairs. We’re under way before the wrestlers get in the ring. Headbutt sends Eugene down. Umga puts the boot (and the butt) to Dinsmore. He hammers away in the corner, and Eugene tries to cover up. Eugene turned his head to the side as Umaga brought on the butt splash, which looked painful. Samoan spike by Umaga. Yeah, it’s over.

Winner: Umaga by pinfall at 1:45

McMahon directs Umaga to “Get’em!,” and they strap Eugene in to the barber chair. Man, are they going to electrocute him or cut his hair? He directs Umaga to choke Eugene out, as Vince takes the scissors and takes some sizable hand-fulls of hair from Eugene. Coach is helpfully holding the mic for Vince. He’s imagining cutting all the fans hair as he’s got a razor now taking care of Eugene. He’s gonna finish the rest in the back. I’m assuming he’s talking about the hair cut. Then he talks to Eugene as if it was Trump, then gives him the Billionaire Bitch-Slap. He threatens to shave everyone’s head who has ever booed him. Who’s go that kind of time?

[Break]

-Candice Michelle has a mic in the ring. She has some not-so-nice things to say about Melina, and challenges her to a, well, not exactly a match, but something. Melina comes out with a mic. Since Melina doesn’t like Playboy cover girls, she obviously doesn’t like Candice. She says the only reason Candice has a job is because she gets naked. I love when women are written as heels because they don’t want to act like a slut and/or get naked. That’s some modern-day thinking. Melina says she hasn’t been a cover girl because it’s beneath her. Candice zings Melina a couple times, to the delight of the crowd. She says if Melina doesn’t want to take her clothes off for those people, she will. She proposes an on-the-spot bra-and-panties match. Melina accepts.

[break]

(3) Melina vs. Candice Michelle, Bra-And-Panties Match
We’re joined in progress as we come back from break, and Melina goes after Candice’s bra. As if it’s a surprise, neither girl has lost any clothing thus far. Candice does her leg-choke in the ropes, while taking off the pants of Melina. Melina though attacks on the outside. Back in, she takes off Candice’s top. Candice snap-hairs Melina over, and almost gets Melina’s top off. Melina applies a leg-scissors and goes after Candice’s pants. The girls roll around on the ground and finally break in the ropes. Off the ropes goes Candice, and kicks Melina in the face. Melina gets a face-buster on Candice then takes off the pants for the win.

Winner: Melina by stripping Candice, 2:28 shown

Ashley comes out to her new music and enters the ring with Melina. The two stare each other down in mid-ring and do some trash-talking. Melina gets kicked in the gut and Ashley takes off Melina’s top. She covers up at ringside. Great Khali’s music hits though, and with Ashley’s back turned, Melina jumps Ashley and puts the boots to her. Melina wisely leaves the ring. Ashley is stuck in the ring with someone she is probably a better wrestler than. Khali grabs Ashley in a choke as King leaves the broadcast booth and enters the ring, going after Khali’s knee. Ashley escapes, but Khali’s got a hold of Lawler, who gets chokeslammed down. Strange that Kane didn’t make the save here.

-Cena vs. Benoit is later tonight, and next, Randy Orton faces Jeff Hardy!

[break]

-Moments ago, Jerry Lawler was Ashley’s knight in shining armor.

-Video package of celebs, including Tony Hawk, Jim Cramer, John Elway, Ricki Lake, John Salley, Jewel, Jimmie Johnson and Kevin Federline give their thoughts on the hair-cutting match. Only one person, Johnson, mentions Vince by name, which is becoming a pattern in these vignettes.

-Todd Grisham replaces Lawler on commentary as Jeff Hardy makes his way to the ring.

(4) Jeff Hardy vs. Randy Orton
Hardy gets an arm-drag on Orton out of the corner, but Orton goes back there and misses a charge after an Irish-whip. Another arm-drag puts Orton down. Orton gets his modified back-breaker on Hardy. He works on the back of Hardy by getting him into a Boston crab. Jeff reaches the ropes and Orton breaks at the last second. Back on his feet, Hardy gets a couple clotheslines and a mule kick. Hardy gets a Whisper in the Wind as Edge comes to ringside and throws a ladder into the ring. At this point, I hear a loud bang, as the stall door in our bathroom has literally fallen off its hinges and down on the ground. That’s not good. Anyway, Orton uses the ladder and gets DQ’ed. Orton jaw-jacks with Edge until Hardy turns him around and hits the Twist of Fate. Hardy climbs the ropes and gets to the top of the ladder. He then lands a legdrop, much to the pleasure of Edge.

Winner: Jeff Hardy by DQ at 3:34

-Up next, first look at “The Condemned.”

[Break]

-Justin Roberts introduces the trailer to “The Condemned.” From what I hear, it’s actually not a bad film. A notch or two above the previous WWE Films efforts. Interesting and unique premise, if nothing else.

-We get the WrestleMania match run-downs.

-Vince and Coach are in the back, and Vince is talking to someone who has a big announcement later tonight. Vince has one too I guess. Next week, it’s Lashley vs. Vince on RAW. Apparently, he doesn’t know there’s a camera RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM. Coach tries to talk him out of it. Vince senses that Coach doesn’t believe in him. He’s gonna beat Lashley next week, and that’s a guaran-damn-tee.

-HBK comes out to join the commentary team for the main event. We also get highlights of JBL and HBK’s face off earlier tonight.

[Break]

-Earlier tonight, Eugene got destroyed, then shaved.

-Eugene is crying backstage, mumbling, “why me?”

-Next week, Lashley vs. Mr. McMahon!

(5) Chris Benoit vs. John Cena
The two men lock up and they trade some right hands in the corner. Benoit is more aggressive though and takes advantage. They go outside quickly and Cena’s head bounces off the announce table. Cena misses a right hand and almost socks Michaels. “You’ll pull back a bloody stump next time,” HBK tells him. Awesome. Back in, Benoit gets a cover and a two-count. Suplex puts Cena down and a running elbow drop hits on Cena’s back. That gets a two as well. Cena gets whipped to the buckle, but gets a foot up, which nails Benoit. HBK tells Grisham to shutup, which is what every viewer is thinking. Leg-whip by Benoit, and he locks in the Sharp-shooter. Close to the ropes, Benoit drags Cena to the middle of the ring. Cena makes the slow crawl again and the move is broken. Three German suplexes by Benoit, and he signals for the end. The Canadian Crippler goes to the top, but misses a flying headbutt. Cena ducks a clothesline and hits a couple flying shoulder-blocks. Five-knuckle shuffle and now Benoit is up for the FU. Benoit fights out but can’t lock in the Crossface. Instead, Cena steps over for the STFU, and after a few agonizing moments, Benoit taps.

Winner: Cena by submission at 6:06

HBK gets into the ring, tunes up the band, and Cena turns around. HBK makes the “I’m in your head” sign and the two have words for each other in mid-ring. Cena picks HBK up for the FU, then lets him down, giving HBK his own brand of head games. JBL comes out with a mic. He says next week, Mr. McMahon wants the biggest show in RAW history. Two main events- one is McMahon/Lashley. The other is Cena and Michaels vs. Batista and Undertaker, in a No Way Out re-match. The arena goes dark and we hear two of Undertaker’s bells toll and we are out!



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BigDaddyLoco
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#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.72
For an 80's gimmick like the Master Lock Challenge to get over like it should have Chris Masters had to have good hype man like Heenan doing the emceeing for the event.

Vince should know that if you do a wrestling hair cutting angle you always have to throw the cut hair wildly UP in the air.

Does Austin get any lines in that movie?

It was nice of Smackdown to come over and job like that.

(edited by BigDaddyLoco on 19.3.07 2312)
redsoxnation
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Since: 24.7.02

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#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.80
Wasn't it only a month ago that Vincent Kennedy McMahon stated that the reason he could not face Donald Trump in a match, and thus needed to have the match done by seconds, was because doctors prohibited from wrestling again? Couldn't they even remember that for the few weeks leading up to Mania?
I guess Fuji was the last Hall of Famer this year.
The MasterLock Challenge is dead. Thank God.
Would have been funny if they had left Eugene with The Missing Link style haircut rather than shaving it completely.
Sad seeing Benoit tap to an STF that is only slightly better than Erik Watts' version.
Nice to see the bait and switch has come back into vogue.
I Breastfeed John Madden
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Since: 13.4.04
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#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.40
Edge's tattoos are fucking garbage.



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hayden
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Since: 11.1.05

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#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 0.81
    Originally posted by redsoxnation
    Wasn't it only a month ago that Vincent Kennedy McMahon stated that the reason he could not face Donald Trump in a match, and thus needed to have the match done by seconds, was because doctors prohibited from wrestling again? Couldn't they even remember that for the few weeks leading up to Mania?


Well, being a heel, it's quite possible his character lied about never being able to wrestle again to get out of the match.
It's False
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Since: 20.6.02
From: I am the Tag Team Champions!

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#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.82
At first, I felt cheated that WWE pulled a bait and switch on JBL's return match. Then I thought a little further and realized, "Wait, am I really about to whine about not getting to see BRADSHAW wrestle?"

I agree with redsoxnation on Vince/Lashley. The whole point of getting the Lashley/Umaga match was because Vince supposedly couldn't wrestle anymore. I'm betting this also ends in a bait and switch. And why give Lashley the night off tonight? He doesn't work Mondays!

Man, who did Eugene piss off? It wasn't enough that he drew the short straw to get his head shaved, but they made such a spectacle of it.

Seeing Benoit tap to Cena's shitty STF was briefly infuriating, but Michaels made up for it through his reaction. He made Benoit tapping appear like a huge deal. Kudos to Shawn.

The NWO rematch should be really interesting and actually makes me want to tune in to Friday's SmackDown to see the buildup from their end. The buildup for the WM main events have been really good thus far. Too bad I can't say the same for the rest of the card.

(edited by It's False on 19.3.07 2256)


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spf
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#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.16
    Originally posted by redsoxnation
    Wasn't it only a month ago that Vincent Kennedy McMahon stated that the reason he could not face Donald Trump in a match, and thus needed to have the match done by seconds, was because doctors prohibited from wrestling again? Couldn't they even remember that for the few weeks leading up to Mania?

I'm feeling like I doubt such a match will ever happen. Perhaps Khali-ference followed by Umaga-ference. Or just a plain old sneak attack by Umaga.


    I guess Fuji was the last Hall of Famer this year.

According to Meltzer they are supposedly inducting

Spoiler Below: Highlight text to read
The Sheik, Jim Ross, and The Wild Samoans.



    The MasterLock Challenge is dead. Thank God.

And it ended building up a WM match at least. Regardless of our opinions of it, Lashley/Umaga is one of the big three matches for this card, so they might as well do everything they can to heat it up. Pretty good "Bobby" chant during this, so maybe the push is working.




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Big Bad
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Since: 4.1.02
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#8 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.10
Chris Masters is now, if possible, even more useless than before. What is he going to gain heat with if his generic finisher can't even be billed as unbreakable? After the head slap, I thought Lashley was going to put out Masters with a full nelson, which could've been a creative way of selling Lashley's strength and still keeping Masters some type of heat.

This really felt like the go-home show that usually comes the week before the PPV. Mostly short matches, all Mania-centric, and aside from Cena/Benoit, nothing of note in terms of in-ring action.

I agree with the logic that since Vince is a lying heel, it's no big deal that he's going to be in the ring next week after claiming his 'pelvis injury' would sideline him. The problem here is that Vince claimed the injury to get out of a challenge from....Donald Trump. But Vince considers himself a-ok to face the hulking ECW champ. Que?

Kudos to Nick Dinsmore for finally getting a decent haircut after umpteen years.

How badly hurt is Edge, and how limited will he be in the MITB match? He has to be the pick to win -- WWE seems to be milking his unbeaten streak at WM for an eventual match with Undertaker.

(edited by Big Bad on 20.3.07 0156)


I don't know what is more disquieting -- the fact that the rest of the statue is missing, or that it has four toes.
Dexley's Midnight Jogger
Pepperoni
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Since: 10.10.02
From: New Hampshire

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#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.81
It's too bad that they hung on to the Eugene character for so long that he became boring to watch. Nick Dinsmore seems like he could play any sort of character and had good wrestling skills. If last night's head shaving leads to any sort of buzz for him, it would be time to have him drop the mentally retarded angle somehow as a storyline. Otherwise it won't matter and he'll have his entire WWE run as Eugene.
blackdragon
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Since: 8.12.06
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#10 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.00
Being a Benoit mark, you know I was hurt right in the feelings when he tapped. The STFU is the single most unconvincing submission hold in the WWE. Hell before Randy Orton got all Boston Crab happy, his chin locks were more painful looking and no one's ever tapped to those. Fuck, I hate every last one of Cena's moves and I hate that the unorthodox street brawler marine guy poser now has submission victories over Benoit, Angle, and HHH. Part of me thinks Rock won't come back because he'd have to put over that crap ass submission as well eventually. I've hated Hogan since I was a kid and I don't think even he deserves to tap out to that if Vince decides he wants to work with him again. Fuck the STFU. One day he just pulls it out of his ass and suddenly it's the most un-fuckin-breakable submission in the history of the universe. I'm surprised they didn't mention Cena breaking the Master Lock and putting it on Chris Masters only to finish the guy off with the truly unbreakable STFU.

The rest of the show could have been Shelton/HBK in an iron man match and Kane chokeslamming Khali on a bed of spikes and I still would have hated the show because of the ending. Why couldn't you kick him Shawn? Why, why, why?

I called Edge's win as soon as I noticed he wasn't in the ring anymore (I missed the faked injury on first view); Candace's voice is horrible and she should never ever be allowed to talk. Melina has a nice ass. I hate Ashley and every other Playboy Cover Girl that gets a match at WM because she got naked and somehow looks like every other blonde girl that's ever been in the magazine. I love how King picks and chooses who's he going to save. It's like the sluttier the woman, the more likely he will risk his health to defend them. Does it make me a bad person that I wanted to see Ashley get chokeslammed to Punjabi? JBL is a promo God and while I was not disappointed in him not wrestling, I so wanted someone to distract Shawn so he could eat a Clothesline from Hell.





Cena can't be beat because he's some unholy genetic recombinate of superstars past. I mean, you might as well call him John "Realest of the Real, Sargent Rock - Cold - A - Mania" Cena.
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#11 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.54
Ah, the bait and switch. Gotta love it. And it looks like we will have another one next week with Vince/Lashley.

Now that the Masterlock challenge is over, stick him a tag team with someone like Kenny. He is also going nowhere as a single.

Regarding Cena's STFU, it might help if he actually bothered to give the illusion that he is pulling back on the neck. At least try, John.

I just hope we actually get the advertised tag match for next week. But I doubt they will do a heel turn this late in the game. Should be plenty of heat for the match either way.




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Since: 13.2.03
From: Chicago

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#12 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.09
After some really nice build, I think this is just the show in between 'setting up matches and angles', and 'the go-home show', and this one particularly felt like a placeholder to me. Anyone who's watched for at least two years saw the end of the battle royal coming the second Edge rolled out of the ring. Makes sense to give Lashley the Masterlock, presuming nothing was getting done setting up a WrestleMania Moment© to blow it off. But for all the time he took to get to the point of breaking it, snapping the hold that fast looked bad.

Vince is doing all he can to support his own program, but I think the decisive DX feud is still too fresh in people's minds, and no one (and The Old Man means NO ONE) thinks there is any chance of Trump losing his 'do. I figured there would eventually be a use for the barber chair they've had on set the last few weeks. And the women's division - join the WWE, take it off for our friends at Playboy and as a bonus get a nice shiny belt as a souvenir for when you're released within 2 years. (No wrestling experience necessary.) At least Candace looks like she's trying to learn how to work.

The RAW main event should still be the match of the show, but remembering the Hogan feud, I was really looking forward to HBK as challenger - but Shawn really hasn't brought his "A" promo game, has he? Almost makes me wonder if the JBL promo was a sort of receipt from backstage for HBK overruling an overt heel turn?



It's the Big "W", I tell ya! The Big "W"!
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Since: 20.9.02
From: New York, NY

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#13 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.28
    Originally posted by kentish
    Now that the Masterlock challenge is over, stick him a tag team with someone like Kenny. He is also going nowhere as a single


I really like that idea. Especially if it leads to clever Kenny Dykstra having big ox Chris Masters always doing his dirty work for him.






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