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The W - Pro Wrestling - Raw 7-14-03
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ScreamingHeadGuy
Frankfurter








Since: 1.2.02
From: Appleton, WI

Since last post: 559 days
Last activity: 559 days
#1 Posted on
FOOTAGE! and stuff. It's Raw from Somewhere! And a Fashion Report, too.

In the ring, Jericho, in checkered shirt and pants, for the Hilight Reel. Bischoff, in black leather coat and neckbrace, is out. Then Austin, in a black "F*uck Fear/Drink Beer" tshirt, is out. Great exposition between Bisch/Austin.

Coach, in black shirt, and King, in black/white vertical stripes with gold scrollwork and sparklies, commentate, and promise we'll get matches eventually.

Trish, in black lace-up, black leather pants with red stripes, sparkly black/red trenchcoat, and cowboy hat, and Nash, in black "BD" singlet and leather pants, and Steiner, in chainmail and balck "Freakzilla" tights, with Stacie, vs. Test, in black undies, with red somethings, and Stevie, in pink "Stevie Night Heat" fullcuts, and Victoria, in red spider-hole top and red pants. Okay match.

In the back, Jericho and Bisch plot. Fortunately they don't notice the camera watching their every word.

Lance, in red undies, reads. Lillian, in white, looks pretty. Maven, in black "M" fullcuts, comes out for a match. Well, at least the commentary isn't any worse than it is with JR. Not a bad match, but if the commentators can't bother to pay attention, why should I?

La Resistance, in same as always, with French flag, wearing the TagTitles, singing, vs. adbreak. Then the Dudleys, also in same as always, with USA flag, are out to clear the ring. Then THEY sing. Hey, it's the night of Singing, only on Raw!

Dudleys, still in the ring, vs. Evolution, HHH in red/gold sparkly "Nature Boy" robe and black undies thereunder, Orton, in black "Orton" undies with hip-bolts, and HHH, in black ironcross undies, wearing the BigGoldBelt. Hey, it's an elimination-style match. Ooo, that's good. Adbreak interferes. Umm, okay match.

In the back, Bisch consoles RVD. Book a match, for next week. RVD promises closure.

Jericho, the midcard heels, and Tommy Dreamer meet, in the back. Oh no, a petition. Surely their combined midcard might can stop Stone Cold Steve Austin.

Mack, in silver "Back the Mack" undies, with Long, in blue suit and white shirt. I don't understand most of what Long says. Adbreak! Mack vs. Rosie, in "Big Daddy" jersey and black shorts, with FOOTAGE! Bad match. Hurricane, from above, in neongreen/black "H" suit, makes the save.

Jericho, still in the back, tries to line-up the Main Event-level heel talent for his petition by recruiting Evolution to his cause.

Booker T, in white hot-crotch flamin' "BookerT" undies, vs. Christian, in tights with red crest and black "C". Oh fuck, not ANOTHER Dusty finish. Post-match Christian beats the ref and Austin stunners Christian.

In the back, Bisch gets a phone call from Linda.

JR, in black outfit and matching hat, and Kane, with a big red box, in black with red straps, and black towell, sit around.

Gail Kim, in black zipper top and skimpies, and black slitted trenchcoat, carrying the Women's Title, vs. (the sexy) Molly Holly, in blue one-strap top and black bellbottoms. Okay match.

In Conn., JR opens Kane's box and gets gas (yes, that does sound wrong). But, Kane, this has been resolved - it was Undertaker who started the fire. Don't you remember your own life? (Well, the last year's booking DID f things up.)

Back in Conn., JR is frightened. Wait, this is the same FOOTAGE! we saw at the opening. The towell is unmoved (such stoicism). Damn, JR points-out the Emporer's new clothes. How cute - two grown men, talking about their feelings. How can Kane, in Connecticut, hear Austin's music, in Indiana? Is there some kind of rift in space and time that allows this communication? If so, I want access to it. Why is the WWE holding out on us? C'mon, it's not like he didn't already try to burn The Brood before (and nobody cared then). Bischoff blames Austin ('cuz he DID create the monster) and condemns him (Austin) to Hell.

Overall: No HBK? No Goldberg? But at least they gave strong support to the Kane saga, and Jericho got lotsa time in the back segments. The matches got a little short schrift, I think. But an okay show (if you discount the f'ed-up over-run).



Fashion Reporter Extraordinare

...And Steph, crying a warcry from the deep primal regions of the human soul, flies in to kick Sable's ass. - the Fashion Report for Smackdown! July 10, 2003

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BigDaddyLoco
Scrapple








Since: 2.1.02

Since last post: 3 hours
Last activity: 10 min.
#2 Posted on
Was that the first time that Big Daddy Cool fought Big Stevie Cool?





Gugs
Bierwurst








Since: 9.7.02
From: Sleep (That's where I'm a viking)

Since last post: 328 days
Last activity: 6 days
AIM:  
Y!:
#3 Posted on
I cannot wait to read the satire on this one. Overall, I think it was a very good hour and 59 minutes, with about 6 more that'll ruin the while thing.



Sometimes I ask myself why I watch WWE after all the crap it's given me. HLA, necro, HHH, and so on. And then it hits me. That one simple phrase that can be modified and used for anything that gets you down, yet makes you keep coming back.

Every episode has the potential to be the best one ever, and I'll be damned if I'm going to miss it after sitting through this shit.
Evil Antler God
Potato korv








Since: 10.1.02

Since last post: 2749 days
Last activity: 875 days
#4 Posted on
Jesus, this whole time it was Undertaker's "are you scared" ghost kids that screwed up Kane's life

Damn them all to hell



Anybody can kick people's asses. But it takes a true monster to kick people's asses AND breastfeed at the same time
- Excalibur05
The Great Thomas
Sujuk








Since: 17.6.02
From: Miami, Florida

Since last post: 3186 days
Last activity: 3186 days
#5 Posted on
Random highlights:

* Wow. Lance Storm's "Boring" gimmick is totally over with the fans!

* So Rosey's a FACE now?!

* Damn, seeing JR burn was disturbing. I'm loving "New Kane".





Val Venis Is One Lucky Bastard.

Shem the Penman
Toulouse








Since: 16.1.02
From: The Off-Center of the Universe (aka Philadelphia)

Since last post: 73 days
Last activity: 3 days
#6 Posted on
Hey, Kane, if you're going to cook J.R. put some barbecue sauce on him first. I didn't hate the interview, because I'm glad that they finally appear to have decided whether Kane is going to be a face or a heel.

On the other hand, after tonight I'm sick of Austin. Where do I go to sign Jericho's petition? The GM/owner/commissioner/whatever, even if it's Austin, just shouldn't be going around beating up active wrestlers. All it does is make them look bad since they apparently can't defend themselves against a retired wrestler with a bum neck. And the Dusty Finish in Booker T/Christian was totally unnecessary, an ugly growth on an otherwise good match.

I'm amazed that they put Steiner and Nash in a match together and the ring didn't disappear in a blast of pure suck. Test seems to have the chickenshit heel act down pat and is having fun with it, but I'll enjoy it more when he starts feuding with someone I care about.

Gail/Molly was good, but you'd have to be blind not to notice how much Molly was carrying Gail. I have an awful feeling that Gail is going to turn into the second coming of Lita. She's got the bad ranas down already.







"next to of course god america i
love you land of the pilgrims' and so forth oh
say can you see by the dawn's early my
country tis of centuries come and go
and are no more what of it we should worry
in every language even deafanddumb
thy sons acclaim your glorious name by gorry
by jingo by gee by gosh by gum
why talk of beauty what could be more beaut-
iful than these heroic happy dead
who rushed like lions to the roaring slaughter
they did not stop to think they died instead
then shall the voice of liberty be mute?"

He spoke. And drank rapidly a glass of water
Underwater
Boerewors








Since: 5.10.02
From: Battle Creek, Michigan

Since last post: 3088 days
Last activity: 2737 days
#7 Posted on
The end of the show was sooo 1998. Really, was there a dumber way to end the show? On the positive side, that had to be the most absolutely fucking FUNNIEST thing I've seen on WWE TV in a looong time. I mean, how could you take that seriously at all? Brilliant.

(edited by Underwater on 14.7.03 2357)


*cry*
StampedeFan23
Morcilla








Since: 12.1.02
From: BC, Canada

Since last post: 1862 days
Last activity: 1398 days
#8 Posted on
Gail Kim vs. Molly. Wow. Just... Wow!



Are you ready for Mahkan-mania to run wild all over you?

I mark for Molly Holly and Lance Storm.
Spaceman Spiff
Knackwurst








Since: 2.1.02
From: Philly Suburbs

Since last post: 1 day
Last activity: 1 hour
AIM:  
#9 Posted on
Maven/Storm was "not a bad match"? Yikes, that was one of the worst matches I've seen lately. Maven looked lost out there.

Overall, a pretty "blah" Raw. None of the matches were particularly memorable. Evilution/Dudz, Book/Christian, and Kim/Molly were OK, but nothing I'll remember by the time Smackdown rolls around.

Dudleys interrupting "dem dere fur'ners" made me roll my eyes. Singing the National Anthem? Hey, I love my country as much as the next guy, but that was just a lame segment.

Helms/Rosey? ::groan::

Wonder where the Austin thing is going? Hopefully, it puts a stop to him being the strongest booked guy on Raw. The non-wrestling GM should not be making the midcard heels look like bumbling idiots.

Kane did a good job w/ the interview segment, but it still doesn't make me forget that I can't stand to watch him wrestle. But, while the segment started off fine, it ended laughably cheesy. A very obvious camera cut when Kane hit "JR", to Kane lighting "JR" on fire, to "JR's" obviously pre-recorded screams just took the segment from "good" to "Wrestlecrap".

Jericho rocked.

Raw = thumbs down.



Bullitt
Shot in the dark








Since: 11.1.02
From: Houston

Since last post: 334 days
Last activity: 1 day
#10 Posted on
Um...did Kane just light Jim Ross on fire?

That's what I thought. That was about 10 different kinds of horrible.




You kids like the rock 'n roll music? Then here's Matthew Good.
Mr Heel II
Bratwurst








Since: 25.2.02

Since last post: 36 min.
Last activity: 35 min.
#11 Posted on
I like how the two main stories flowed together tonight. Jericho's petition leads to a good cliffhanger for next week. And they finally acknowledged Kane's lack of scars and put a reason behind the whole thing. And they gave it an interesting direction. But that had to be the slowest igniting gasoline I've ever seen.

Rest of the show...I couldn't keep interested.

I realize that boring is his gimmick, but the play-by-play during the Storm/Maven match STILL annoyed me.

I'm really getting annoyed with this "start the segment then go to commercial break" thing they're doing. That annoyed me even more than Bubba's singing.

Another week...Another Christian/Booker T match. If they have nothing better for Goldberg to do, why not let HIM go after Booker's I/C title for awhile?

Test as the Cowardly Lion could be interesting.

(edited by Mr Heel II on 14.7.03 2249)


Amazing Telephone
Salami








Since: 12.12.02
From: Winnipeg, Manitoba

Since last post: 79 days
Last activity: 16 hours
#12 Posted on
You know, say what you will about the Dudley Boyz, but at least their singing is hilarious. Unintentionally hilarious, I presume, but hilarious nonetheless.

Did I miss something? When did Test actually become one of the most enjoyable parts of the show? I mean, yeah, he was somewhat interesting before (even if living in Canada means I don't get to see everything), but tonight for whatever reason he was just on. Wow. Those facial expressions were priceless.

I didn't bother to watch the Kane interview; did I miss anything particularly interesting?

[EDIT: Yes, apparently, I did. Not necessarily good, it appears, but at least somewhat interesting.]

Other than that, same ol' same ol' for the show. Just slap in the usuals -- "Chris Jericho was good this week; Christian/Booker was good this week; the rest of it was okay, but could be better" -- and that'll about sum it up.





Also: TWOOOO~!

(edited by Amazing Telephone on 14.7.03 2045)
TheIronGeek
Linguica








Since: 11.7.02
From: NJ

Since last post: 3683 days
Last activity: 3657 days
#13 Posted on
They explained the lack of scars???

I missed that, can someone fill that in for me?

Oh and GUGS...

That pic of Steph is amazing...

TheGeek
knightvibe
Salami








Since: 12.7.03
From: st louis, missouri

Since last post: 3382 days
Last activity: 3381 days
#14 Posted on

RAW wasnt the greatest but wasnt the worst. Yeah, the Kane burning Good Ol' JR segment was cheesy/shocking/laughable but at least it promoted Kane as a true mental case psycho ward monster that thinks he is burnt but isnt really!
I think this is setting up Austins return to the ring. The buildup tonight makes me think Austin will get fired or resign as Co-Gm and go on to Summerslam to try to stop the monster KANE.
The buildup for next week was tremendous. They should pop a huge rating for the Stone Cold cliffhnager, Jericho vs. Michaels & Kane vs. RVD.
The more I think about it while I didnt think it was the greatest show it could be a real stepping stone to great things.
Lets hope!

(edited by knightvibe on 14.7.03 2351)


and thats all i have to say about that!
BigDaddyLoco
Scrapple








Since: 2.1.02

Since last post: 3 hours
Last activity: 10 min.
#15 Posted on
I think that not having a PPV every month is only going to help the shows. Raw is the better all round show right now.

The ending was certainly campy, but I really enjoyed the days when Kane was going to burn wrestlers like cord wood and The Undertaker was nailing wrestlers to a cross. Those were some good times.

Who knew that Kane was such a good actor?



The Great Thomas
Sujuk








Since: 17.6.02
From: Miami, Florida

Since last post: 3186 days
Last activity: 3186 days
#16 Posted on

    Originally posted by TheIronGeek
    They explained the lack of scars???

    I missed that, can someone fill that in for me?

After the accident, the doctors said that Kane's scars were only superficial, but Kane didn't believe them. That's why he had to "hurt them".

Then Stone Cold came out, some shit happened and Kane set J.R. on fire. Then Bischoff said "Damn you Stone Cold!" The End.





Val Venis Is One Lucky Bastard.

Gugs
Bierwurst








Since: 9.7.02
From: Sleep (That's where I'm a viking)

Since last post: 328 days
Last activity: 6 days
AIM:  
Y!:
#17 Posted on
They finally said that after the fire, Kane went to see some doctors, and they said the scars were superficial and would go away, which they apparently did. Kane insisted that he still had the scars, and thus did whatever it his he did for 20, 30 years without seeing a mirror. Kane was convinced that he had scars when he didn't. So if Kane had looked in a mirror at all, there would have been no residual anger towards Undertaker and thus no reason to come to the WWF at all. So, basically, it's Paul Bearer's fault!

IronGeek, I think that is the all around best I have seen Steph look, ever.



Sometimes I ask myself why I watch WWE after all the crap it's given me. HLA, necro, HHH, and so on. And then it hits me. That one simple phrase that can be modified and used for anything that gets you down, yet makes you keep coming back.

Every episode has the potential to be the best one ever, and I'll be damned if I'm going to miss it after sitting through this shit.
The Vile1
Lap cheong








Since: 4.9.02
From: California

Since last post: 1822 days
Last activity: 1554 days
#18 Posted on
What about the time DX attacked Kane, ripped off his mask and took a picture? I mean couldn't they see right there that he didn't have any scars, but instead they made scowls and faces at how hideous he looked. As it ended up the pictures of kane's face didn't come out so they could not blackmail him.




"Just a humble bounty hunter, ma'am."
-Spike Spiegel
RKMtwin
Boudin rouge








Since: 1.3.02
From: Denver, Colorado

Since last post: 1993 days
Last activity: 1437 days
#19 Posted on
Man, Test came across as a complete BITCH-ASS tonight. I actually want to see somebody beat the snot out of him! That's a good thing, because I think Test is starting to get over with the crowd. I mean, they started busting out the A-HOLE!!! chant at him during the match. That's good. (Hmmm... maybe this is where they could fit Goldberg in...)

And the line of the night goes to StoneCold Steve Austin:

"I was gonna whip a man's ass tonight."

And he looked so disheartened when he said that!!! LOL!!!!!!!!

Austin's still the man.

ALSO--

*Shem beat us all to the BBQ Sauce/JR joke. DAMN YOU, SHEM THE PENMAN!!! DAMN YOU TO HELL!!!!

Kane scares the SHIT out of me now...



David Crockett sez it best, folks: "Look at 'im, Tony! Look at 'im!"

drjayphd
Scrapple
Moderator








Since: 22.4.02
From: Connecticut

Since last post: 19 days
Last activity: 11 hours
AIM:  
ICQ:  
Y!:
#20 Posted on

    Originally posted by The Vile1
    What about the time DX attacked Kane, ripped off his mask and took a picture? I mean couldn't they see right there that he didn't have any scars, but instead they made scowls and faces at how hideous he looked. As it ended up the pictures of kane's face didn't come out so they could not blackmail him.


Maybe they lied about the pics because they knew he wasn't scarred? And their reactions were probably just to twist the knife further.



Today's Out-Of-Context Quote, Courtesy of hardygrrl:

"...between the grime layer and the Seventies game show host hair, I'd rather rim Undertaker after a White Castle/Schlitz bender."
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So we'll ignore the evidence everyone says he's a curmudgeon? He'd rather say "I finished a match with a broken arm look how tough I am" rather than say "Kurt, I'm too far.
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