Setup: Most of this work is Robert Ortega Jr.'s work - all the transcriptions, vignettes, commercials. I did the stuff from the - after the match description to the () for the time. And I combined it all, so if something looks weird let me know. Feedback is good - are the different voices a distraction?
WWE Signature; TV14DLV; CC; Attitude, Entertainment, Bischoff's Face (And I so hoped it was gone after last week's absence)
We open with semi-customary pre-pyro segment which may or may not have any bearing on the show. An F-View camera picks up on Eric Bischoff who sets a tape in the VCR in his office, which revisits his encounter of sorts with Stephanie McMahon on SmackDown! Last Thursday. Just in case, here is what transpired: Bischoff, in a Vince McMahon mask opens "Well since the news of Scott Steiner broke, it appears to me that he's going to be joining Raw." Stephanie retorts "Oh and, what gives you that idea VINCE?" "Ho, ho, ho, ha, ha" Bischoff removes the mask "Because I'm the guy that's gonna sign him." Stephanie tries a right-hand slap, which is promptly blocked, Bischoff with an aggressive kiss. Stephanie tries resistance, but it eventually wanes. PAUSE. Bischoff then proceeds to the mirror with a concerned look, or so I am guessing.
"Across the Nation" opens WWE Raw once again, and here we go.
RawPyro; Raw Live from Boston, Massachusetts on this, the 4th of November, 2002. Transmitido en Espanol, the whole spiel.
Here is HBK, Shawn Michaels, bag shouldered, as he waves and smiles to, some woman whose name I do not know. "New shirt, all for me? Cool. Do I get to wear this?" He displays the front of said shirt to her, as if she did not know what it looked like already, and to the camera.
3 Minute Warning (Rosey and Jamal, 720 pounds; with Rico and last week on Raw; Dudleyz get a three minute surprise and Spike Dudley gets captured to lure Bubba away from his Tag Title match) v Jeff Hardy (Cameron, NC, 218 pounds) and Bubba Ray Dudley (310 pounds)- this time, I notice that Rico isn't included at all in the video, though this time the chyron doesn't mention him. We see that Last Week, Lillian could have at least given a heads up to the Dudleyz while she was running for high ground. Hey, did Jeff cut his hair? Wow. JR's still all nutty about a Dudley and a Hardy teamed up, but I'm pretty sure we saw one of the times they were leading into a three way match against E&C. 4 man brawl to start, with the establishing team getting the best of it. Rosie (wearing a homemade Dizzy Dean jersey) whips Bubba into a corner, but Bubba comes back with a clothesline, causing Rosie to leave the ring. Bubba busies himself with keeping Rico and Rosie at bay while Jamal continues to work over Jeff. Whip, lift (for the Samoan Drop?) and Jeff hits the dropkick. 3 Minutes talk strategy on the outside, while Bubba and Jeff come up with a quicker plan instead. Jeff starts running, Bubba goes to his hands and knees for the boot, and there's Poetry In Motion to the floor! (not called as such.) Jeff rips off his shirt, then throws Jamal in. I guess Bubba and Jamal are are legal men - Bubba jabs as we watch an X-Box replay. Corner whip, reversed, Bubba gets an elbow up. Oh no not the senton - HITS. Must've learned something about those from Jeff. Rosie in, but Bubba block his punch and knocks him down. JR is mentioning that this is the first time back for HBK in Boston since WM14 w/Mike Tyson vs Steve Austin. Bubba with an armbar on Jamal, tag to Jeff, Jeff to the top with the axhandle on the shoulder. armbar, but Jamal reverses to a whip - Jeff back with something resembling a jumping forearm. One two big kickout. Jeff opts to tag out to Bubba. Bubba in, armbar, but Jamal with a knee. Jamal clutches his arm, then kicks Bubba's. Whip, backdrop but Bubba doesn't go far and grabs Jamal for the sunset flip, Jamal fights, makes the tag, Bubba doesn't seem to realize it but doesn't hold on to Jamal for the pin anyway, instead standing up and walking right into a side belly to belly form Rosie. Blatant choke. Kick. Forearm. 2 Skinnee Js did the music, don't you know. Headbutt. Rico getting on the fans and the fans getting on Rico. Meanwhile, Bubba is battling back - but Rosie takes him down a with a forearm. Tag to Jamal, Jamal with a kick, right. Double headbutt - but Bubba ducks and they hit each other. Bubba off the rope and a desperation double clothesline hits. Bubba needs to make a tag - and he does. Jeff dropkick in, springboarding off Jams back to hit a dropkick on Rosie, dropkick for Jamal, roll out of the way of a Rosie falling headbutt, double leg take down on Jamal, Compactor one two NO. Rosie charges at Jeff, Jeff ducks down and pulls the top rope with him, and out goes Rosie. Jamal on Jeff with a clothesline, corner whip but Jeff hits the Whisper in the Wind one two Rosie breaks it up. Bubba in with a kick for the ribs for Rosie, rights for Jamal. Jeff with a cross body to take him and Rosie out, while Bubba keeps working on Jamal with punches in the corner. He must be waiting for something - oh, there's Rico in, Bubba' actually seems to take a look and continue punching Jamal, what are we wait - Spike Dudley is out, kick, run up the steps, Dudley Dog on Rico! See, Bubba must've known that Spike as coming to take care of Rico - well, anyway, Jamal clotheslines Bubba and goes out to take care of Spike - gutbuster drop on the barricade. Back in the ring, Rosie misses a corner charge and Bubba hits a reverse neckbreaker on the rebound. Jeff goes up - wassup double legdrop to the midsection. "JEFF! GET THE TABLES!" Jeff goes out but it's near where Rico is still out so Jeff is easily distracted by stomping him. Back in the ring, Jamal is back - Bubba ducks the clothesline, right right right flip flop grab NO Jamal hits a palm shot (shotay!) to the throat. Corner whip, reversed, Bubba charges in and hits a clothesline. Bubba drops to his knees, because he knew Jeff was back (and forgot all about that table), there's a normal Poetry in Motion for you. Jeff is going up, but Rosie pulls out Bubba to the floor, Rico is back up and distracting ref Chad Patten - and Rosie pushes Jeff off the top rope. Jamal getting back to his feet - press Samoan Drop one two three. (6:21) Bubba screams at the world for yet another loss, while 3 Minutes collects themselves. Replay. I'm not sure why Rico had to distract for the push but I'm not Rico. JR promises this is over.
After the match, Bubba decides to "Damn" it all, while Rosie and Jamal collect Rico and head back up the ramp. Bubba yells at the victors and point to himself.
Backstage Victoria and, what is this, Ivory? Well, I am guessing that's part of the Big Show trade, or something of the like. With a light tap to Ivory's shoulder, Victoria asks "Hey, you ready?" To which Ivory applies the stock answer "Yes, I'm ready." "Ivory, you don't know how thrilled I am that your on Raw." "Oh, it's awesome to be back." "But you know what? I'm even more thrilled that Trish Stratus accepted my hardcore challenge at Survivor Series." "Oh, that's gonna be awesome." Boy is she fond of that word tonight. "Not only am I gonna take the championship, I'm gonna take Trish's soul." Is that possible? "Now hold on, killer. My match with Trish is next, and if things go my way, there's not gonna be much left of her. But I promise, for you, I'll leave a little bit of that pretty face intact, OK?" "Yeah, that Trish Stratus thinks she's so hot (Ivory: Mm-hmm) with her pretty little face, and her pretty little body, heheh. After the beating I give her, heh, she' gonna have pretty little scars (rubs hands in a maniacal fashion and starts to go off-screen) and pretty little bruises (Ivory with an egad look), and…" "Gosh, and they said I was nuts (raises an eyebrow)."
Cut to a shot of Trish, who finishes getting ready for her match, shoulders the belt, and heads out for her match.
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Women's Champion Trish Stratus (Toronto, Ontario, Canada with WWE Anthology, Time to Rock and Roll, Trish Stratus, Available November 12th, XBOX, Truth, and JVC's Tower of Power HX Series) v Ivory (wwedivas.com) -no one immediately explains why it can be a Hardcore match, but I'm guessing the reasoning is "well, he said it wouldn't happen on RAW anymore and Survivor Series is RAW, it's a PPV." Hey look Ivory got new TE3 footage - and also a very pink/purple shiny outfit. In her continuing effort to revolutionize women's ring gear by putting holes where they don't normally belong, Ivory has a cut out on both her upper thighs, though there's string ties to keep her pants from falling down entirely. Ivory does not wait for the bell to punch Trish right in the face. Right, big slap. Slam. Suplex, floatover one two no. We look away from the ring (though we can see Ivory's gotten a headlock via ParallelogramTron) to watch Victoria (w/a hat that may not be hers, but may in fact be Trish Stratus' hat - or Perry Saturn's) join the announcers. Victoria prefers the Chris Benoit style of commentating, while the announcers try to figure out that hat situation. Back in the ring, Ivory whip, her clotheslines misses, Trish doesn't. One two no - the crowd is reacting to this hard hitting woman's action with a weak "puppies" chant. Trish whip, head down too soon, Ivory kicks it. Ivory right misses, and Trish hits the roundhouse to the head one two no. JR, having not watched Heat, asks Victoria why she asked for a Hardcore match. Victoria: "..." Ivory just gave Trish a reverse jawbreaker (although it looked a lot more like Ivory faceslammed herself and Trish felt sympathy pain; the crowd does not react well to the goofy/bad move.) Dropkick to the head is better. Turnbuckle smash. Why not do it again. Gutwrench suplex! One two no! Chinlock with feared nose pull. Face smash into the mat. Hair toss. Ivory is talking now (duh). Fireman's carry pickup by Ivory, but Trish slides down the back for a sunset flip one two no. Ivory misses a clothesline, but Trish hits a reverse neckbreaker one two no. Trish with a forearm, forearm, forearm, corner chop, chop, let's look at the action from a very far away viewpoint now! (It doesn't make it better.) JR: "What in your life has made you [Victoria] so bitter? We're just trying to find out!" WATCH YOUR OWN TELEVISION. Corner whip, Trish charges into a back elbow, Ivory goes to the top rope but is stunned by the sheer implausibility of Trish's Stratusphere (or that's my guess why she doesn't fight back despise being in control.) Trish grabs Ivory with a headlock, to the ropes but Ivory slips free inside cradle one two no. Ivory with a clothesline. Right. Corner whip, Ivory charges into Trish's boot - Trish off the second rope, bulldog one two three. If I told you "Ivory is a three time Women's Champion" often during the match, would you have believed that she had a chance? That's what JR did, anyway. (3:21)
After the fact, Victoria takes this opportunity to snarl at the result.
Raw Tonight: Booker T and Kane versus Triple H and Chris Jericho.
Trish heads back up the ramp and point to her head while Victoria removes and discards Trish's hat and throws her water bottle at Trish. Lawler tries to lightly restrain Victoria but is smacked for his trouble. Hair grabs by both, punches, but Victoria throws Trish into the set, kicks her four times, and slams her face into the steel three times over. The referees finally get out and separate the two. Victoria, still rabid, tries for Trish. More tangling for them.
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Moments ago: Trish and Victoria collide on the stage, etc. And here are the New England Patriots at ringside.
For our second F-View segment of the night, Terri 90 degrees herself, looking into the refrigeration as Victoria slams open the door and slams it closed accordingly "Ah! What?!" Ever the professional journalist, Terri replies "Uh, you know what? Maybe later on tonight I could get an interview with you, when you get yourself together a little bit." "What's that supposed to mean? Am I not pretty enough for you, Terri?" "Well, no, it…it's not that at all, it's just that at this moment in time, you seem a little bit…crazed, that's all" Victoria grabs Terri "CRAZED?!" "Ahhhhhhhhhh!" (Shoves Terri against the door) "You want to see crazed?!" Let's see, Terri loses her shirt, gets tossed to the floor, has her skirt stripped, when…
We get an "RNN Breaking News" Graphic. "Injury Update: Continuous Orton Coverage." Hi, Randy Orton here with another special injury update. I have great news to announce. My shoulder now has thirty-two percent mobility. That's up two percent from last week (Graphic: "Orton: Shoulder at 32%." ) and all I know is that I wouldn't have made that much progess without you, the WWE fans (Graphic: "Orton thanks WWE fans" ). So please, keep sending your e-mails to (Graphic: "Get Well Randy: Send you email to.") firstname.lastname@example.org , because with your support, I know I'll be back in no time."
Now, to Bischoff's office, where Bischoff berates a stagehand. "You know, when I first met you, I thought you just looked stupid. When I told you to put F-View cameras around the building I did not mean in my office." "But I…" "Don't but me, just pack your stuff, get the hell outta here, you are fired." Vince's soul is branching out, is it? "F-I-R-good night-E-D-so long, FIRED!" The stagehand opens the door to leave, revealing Triple H and Ric Flair who enter and sit at their leisure. Bischoff asks, irritated, "And just what exactly can I do for you?" Triple H does the talking here "Heh, what can you do for us, huh? What can he do for us Ric (Flair: snickers)? What you can do for me, you can tell me what the hell you're gonna do about this Shawn Michaels thing. Huh? I got Shawn Michaels runnin' around here like some deranged lunatic, jumpin' me from behind, sayin' he's gonna jump me from behind at any turn. You know, our locker room is just a few feet down the hall, and we can't even leave it to go get a cup of coffee or anything because we've gotta be lookin' over our shoulder, Shawn Michaels might jump out at us, at any time. You know, not that I would mind, I could finish the whole thing once and for all if he would. But, uh, quite frankly, I'm sick of worrying about it. And, and while I'm at it, being sick of things, ya know ever since Vince McMahon froze the rosters on Raw and SmackDown!, you've been treatin' me like a piece of crap, that's right a piece of crap (stands up). Casket matches? F-View TV in my locker room? Tonight, you got me and Jericho booked in a match with Kane and Booker T? I'm the damn franchise around here Eric! I'm the World Heavyweight Champion! That's not how you treat me. And now, at Survivor Series, you've got me defending the World Heavyweight Title against five guys, in an Elimination Chamber, and I don't even know what the hell an Elimination Chamber is." "Hm, hm, hm, hm, well you don't know what it is, well guess what? Neither does the rest of the world, do you know why? Because that's the way I want it, but come Survivor Series, you and the entire planet are going to see the elimination chamber, and believe me, it's gonna be a sight. Now as far as putting you in the match, you're Triple H, you're the game, you deserve to be a part of history. Hell, when I made you the World Heavyweight Champion, I knew you were the very best that Raw had to offer. And as far as you being in there with five different guys, I mean let's face it, you're gonna be defending your title against five of the greatest superstarts in the sport today. You're gonna have the chance to prove to the entire world that you are just that..damn..good. Think about it. And to top it all off, you get to avenge that loss to Shawn Michaels at SummerSlam, IF he decides to accept the match. Just think about that." "Yeah, I've been doin' a lot of thinking Eric, and what I've been thinking, is either your screwin' me, or maybe, maybe just somebody's influencing you, right Ric?" Ric presses play on the VCR and we get to relive the Bischoff-Stephanie kiss, again. Triple H continues "Now let me get this straight, let me get this straight, I put on a mask and dress up like Kane to screw a mannequin. You put on a mask and dress up like Vince McMahon, to make out with my ex-wife (face closes in on Bischoff's) now who's screwin' who?"
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Lance Storm and William Regal (470 pounds) vs - Storm takes the microphone here. "As most of you people don't know, tomorrow is election day. And most of you Americans take that freedom for granted. But it's a shame that all you people are too stupid…" he is interrupted by "All my people call me Big Bad Booty Daddy! (siren)" It's a Scott Steiner promo on the Titantron. "I only care about two things, my freaks and my peaks (pecs?)! Holler if you hear me!"
Lance Storm and William Regal (470 pounds) v Tommy Dreamer and Al Snow (448 pounds) - JR lets us know that we can go to thenewtnn.com for a chance to win an autographed copy of Hulk Hogan's new autobiography. Sounds like a good idea, doesn't seem worth paying for. Tommy throws his cap at Lance and uses the distraction to punch him. Whip, no Tommy short clothesline. Right for Regal, but Lance sneaks in a kick. JR remembers that Al and Dreamer were in a Singapore Cane match two weeks ago, wonders if they can trust each other, and says Eric made them a team for this match - point for him. Lance with an armbar, tag to Regal, Tommy with a right for Storm, Regal bealed in. Tommy runs Regal cross ring for a turnbuckle smash, tag to Snow. Double whip, double back elbow. Al ducks a Lance clothesline, back elbow, and thrown out. Announcers start speculating about Triple H being right. Al with a corner whip, Regal reverses it and brings Al back to the heel corner, Al slides short but Lance smashes his knee into the apron from the outside. Regal goes for a single leg, and kick to the back of Al's knee. Snap mare into the ropes, knocking Al's knee onto the ropes. Tag to Storm, who yanks the injured leg around, despite Al trying to kick and punch him away. Brief USA chant. Storm with a leg grapevine. Tag to Regal, who kicks the back of the bad left leg. European Uppercut. Elbow drop to the inside of the leg, and Regal cranks the leg some more. Regal holds on to that left foot but Al manages to get to his feet on one leg. Punches won't get him free, so Al pulls off a monkey flip to knock Regal way. Unfortunately, he knocks Regal right into his own corner, so Storm can make a tag and clip Al before HE can make the tag. One two no. Storm pulls AL away from his corner - elbow drop to the inside of the leg, elbow to the inside of the leg, leg grapevine. Cranking it in, as Al wedges his right leg around Storm's head and proceeds to smash it Storm's face very violently to break it up. Al getting up to his feet - Storm kick his Al's leg out from underneath his leg. Al holds the ropes to stands, but manages right hands to keep Storm at bay, and a clothesline takes them back down. Al crawls - tag to Dreamer. Clothesline for Storm, right for Regal, powerslam for Storm, backdrop for regal. Kick, DDT - no, Regal breaks it up with a clothesline from behind because Dreamer takes a moment to let everyone know what he's doing. Al back in with a clothesline on Regal, but he's hobbled. Meanwhile, Dreamer reverses a Storm whip into a DVD. Cover, but the ref Nick Patrick is tending to Al and doesn't notice Regal walk up and kick Dreamer in the face with the top of his boot. Everyone sells it like Dreamer's been shot, Storm covers one two three. (3:38) At this point Dreamer clutches the side of his face and we get a replay of the kick to said face.
In the back, HBK heads to the coffee table and a stagehand greets him. "Hey Shawn." "Hey how you doin'?" "Good." "How's the coffee?" "It's not bad, it's not bad, a little strong." "Hey, uh, I don't suppose you've seen Triple H around lately have ya?" "Yeah, uh, about five minutes ago he walked down the hallway there around the corner, I think his locker rooom's down that way." "Around the corner?" "Yeah, all the way around the corner." With a point and a smile "You're spectacular." "Hey thanks." Michaels heads that way as Batista exits from a locker room and heads for the ring.
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We are back and Stacy Keibler carries a box of mail toward Test, who is tending to his hair. "Test. Look, I know your not too happy about the next step, but look at all your fan mail. My marketing plan is working! Just a week ago, you were calling your fans Testicles and the mailbox is overflowing. I'm a genius!" No response from Test, more on hair. "OK, let me show you." Keibler 90 degrees to put down the box and give Test a view but he does not respond. She grabs some mail, opens one " 'Dear Stacy, every night O dream of your long (slows) sexy legs wrapped around' (shakes head)…ew , forget about that one." She goes to another. "Here's another one, "Dear Test, I can't believe I'm going to write this in a letter but I love your Testicles. I'm gonna start the first Testicle fan club.' Do you hear that? You have a fan club, aren't you excited? Andrew, aren't you even listening to me?" Test finally responds "Stacy, I really don't want to do this." "Look, sit down. This isn't gonna hurt a bit." A voice offstage says "I found 'em." Test tries to leave but Stacy stops him and sits on his lap as some woman places a cover over him. "Don't you want my help?" Test nods resignedly. "Then it's time (caresses hair), it's time to cut you hair! Go for it, Jan!" Snip.
Dave Batista (312 pounds) v Justin Credible (In ring) - I had this weird idea that Raven's Masterpiece was Batista but I guess that's out. JR brings up that Justin is a former ECW Champion, which means this is Trish/Ivory again. They don't as much circle as reach for leverage, Justin not being anxious for this. Batista runs Justin in the corner, so no lockup for you. Big beal. Corner clothesline. Whip, big flapjack. Corner whip, corner charge into a Justin boot. Corner charge into a Justin boot. Justin off the second rope with a second rope ax-handle, Batista catches it, Justin stands in fear, Justin is pushed back in the corner and rebounds into a Batista fireman's carry - running forward roll slam has looked better. JR brought up Batista being a free agent before the Big Show trade. You know, they never really mentioned how Ivory was moved over - assumption is she's part of the trade but they didn't actually say it. Corner charge and Justin moves. Maybe Batista should stop doing that. Justin with a right, right, kick, right knocks Batista into the ropes, Batista comes back with a roaring clothesline (Justin drops far too early - maybe he remembered what that did to Orton.) Yelling. Pulling him - sitdown powerbomb one two three. (1:24) After the match, we get a double replay of the sit-out powerbomb.
Triple H and Ric Flair walk down some backstage hall. "This whole waiting for Shawn Michaels to jump us, I'm sick of it." "H, H, in due time, in due time." "You know what?" "Settle down, come on, come on." "I've had enough. I'm going to the ring. I'm gonna call his ass out now." "Are you sure you really want to do that? You don't even know what he's got planned." "Yeah, I don't know what he's got planned (takes the belt from Flair, finally). Bit, uh, I'm gonna go to the ring, you tell Shawn if he wants to find me, that's where I'll be." Flair shakes his head as Triple H leaves.
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And now, the Extreme Blast of the Night, brought by JVC's Tower of Power; Raw last week, Michaels comes out of the casket to give Triple H some Sweet Chin Music, Kane hits the chokeslam, and wins the match. Then, Michaels dances on Triple H's grave, sort of.
Here comes Triple H, with Raw credits, to the ring for some more talking. "I'm sick of these games Shawn. I'm sick of the waiting. You want me? You're not gonna jump me from behind again. You want me? Let's do it right now Shawn. Get your ass out in this ring. Hell, your career ended once in Boston, let's see if I can make lightning strike twice in the same place. Come on Shawn." He waits, but nothing. "All right, you're not gonna come down. We're gonna do this on your terms Shawn? We're gonna do this your way? All right, you just remember one thing Shawn. Do not accept this invitation to this Elimination Chamber match at Survivor Series, because if you do, it will be the last thing you do. Shawn, your body cannot take this and you know it, and if you step in the ring with me this time, there will be no next time. Shawn, I am going to walk into Survivor Series the World Champion, and I am gonna walk out of Survivor Series and the Elimination Chamber match as the World Champion, and there is not a damn thing that you, or anybody else can do about it." "Can you dig it, sucka?!" I think Booker T has a rebuttal here so his music fires up. "You didn't say that. Tell me, you didn't just say that. See the way I see it dawg, you can handle your business with Shawn Michaels later. But tonight, more specifically, right now, you got to deal with the five time, five time, five time, five time, five time, WCW Champion, you dig?" "Oh, Booker, you might have been a five time WCW Champion, but that was then and this is now, and the fact is right now bubby, you can't even hold my jock." "That so?" "Yeah that's so." "Is that so?" "Yeah." "Well that isn't the way I see it. (Heads toward ring) See I'm sick of this mess. I'm sick of the way you walk, sick of the way you talk (gets in ring), more specifically, I'm sick of seeing that World Championship around your waist, and at Survivor Series, I'm takin' it." "Let me remind you just who the hell I am…" "LOOK man, I know who you think you are! You think you run this damn show right? Well you don't run Booker T, and at Survivor Series, Elimination Chamber match, I'm gonna be thinking about one thing, one thing only, Don't hate the playa, hate the game!" For another rebuttal, Chris Jericho's countdown begins and here he is. "Whatsa matter, Book? Are you upset that I interrupted your stupid little catchphrase? Well I'm sick of hearing you say sucker! And I am sick and tired of you calling me a sucker because Chris Jericho is not a sucker! I am not a sucker! And I'm gonna prove it at Survivor Series cause not only am I gonna beat Triple H to once again become the World Champion but Booker, I personally guarantee I'm going to eliminate you from the ELIMINATION CHAMBAA myself! Oh you walk around, you think your better than Chris Jericho. Oh I see it, you think your more entertaining than Chris Jericho. I can tell. Why?! Why?! Just because you do the stupid spinarooni?! (Booker nods) Let me tell you something junior, that's got nothing on the Chris Jericho juke and jive, (does some odd dance) yeah! Check it out! Oh, look at that! Check it out, check it out! Yeah! You like that?! You like that?! Huh? You like that?! You know I proved once again that I've got more talent in my little finger than you or any of these ass-clowns here have in their bodies! And Triple H and I don't like each other, but we are tag team partners tonight and the way I see it, you the sucker now, sucker! Because right now, Booker T (Booker takes a few steps back) and the T stands for trapped." Triple H has a right blocked, Booker with three rights to Triple H, and a right hand knockdown to Jericho. A knockdown to Triple H and a kick, but Jericho gets up and gets him from behind and he and Triple H double team Booker T in the corner until the massive explosion hits and Kane comes to the ring, which prompts Jericho and Triple H to retreat.
Commercials" Bond for the 21st century on TNN Half Past Dead Twix Red Faction II Game UFC Vendetta Local ad.
Now the Boot of the Week brought by Lugz: Raw last week, Stacy gives perhaps the worst low blow In history to Goldust so that Test gets the big boot and the win.
Stacy talks to an unseen Test "It looks great. Trust me, with your new haircut, I can see your testicles growing! Come on."
The Hurricane (with WWE Anthology, Eye of the Hurricane, The Hurricane, Available November 12th v Test (with Stacy Keibler and Raw next week at the US Bank Arena in Cincinnati, OH)- Hurricane has a mask on top of his mask which he gives to a fan. The drama is which title JR will choose to bring up for Hurricane - Tag Team? Cruiserweight? European? Hardcore? You buy the whole seat but you only need the edge! Test has Michael Cole's haircut now, a daring move. Hurricane poses instead of circling. Hurricane ducks a lockup, waistlock but Test breaks free with a back elbow. Corner elbow, corner elbow, corner elbow. Test backs up, charges, and right into the double boot. Hurricane with an armbar, right, right, right, twist but Test gets a knee. Whip, Test with a flapjack lift, Hurricane lands behind on his feet, Hurricane right is caught and Test hits the full nelson release slam. Right. Lawler: "People are going nuts for this guy!" Crowd: "[what Victoria said]" Corner elbow. Corner elbow. Corner elbow. Corner kicks. Corner whip, charge in with a clothesline. Corner whip, corner clothesline. Lawler: "I'm a big Testicle!" I always had my suspicions. Hurricane collapses. Test pulls him up, and now Hurricane is fighting back with rights, but a knee stops that. Test goes for the Jacknife Powerbomb (LET IT GO MAN) but Hurricane goes over the top into a sunset flip one now Test grabs pulls him up to a powerbomb lift (ref dutiful counts while Test is trying to pick up Hurricane one two anyway), Hurricane fights it with punches and takes him over with something like a 'rana. Hurricane with kicks to the back of Test's left leg while JR reveals that those who picked both the tag team title and the cruiserweight title are winners! Hurricane off the ropes, ducks a clothesline, Hurricane hits his jumping one. Shining Wizard (uncalled - JR manages "what a kick" for a replay) one two no. Hurricane with a right, reverse, Test charges into a back elbow. Overcast but no one's home. Test calls for the boot, but Hurricane take a while to get up, then ducks it. Goozle, but I don't think that's going to work - Test elbows out. Test with a kick, pumphandle but Hurricane lands behind (on the apron), and manages a reverse neckbreaker over the ropes! I still don't think he's going to win. Going up, Test turns around - cross body is easily caught. Test drops Hurricane's feet to the mat but holds onto a reverse facelock - ah, he's back to using the Roll of the Dice as his finisher again. One two three. Marketing Person Stacy has apparently yet to figure out a name to this move, maybe next week. (3:42)
After the match, Stacy grabs a microphone "Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on a second. Test has a BIG announcement to make." Stacy nods but Test is unsure. Stacy whispers something into Test's ear but he is comically dumbfounded by it all. But a kiss from Stacy is all the convincing it takes for him to say "I love my Testicles." Then a replay of Test's finisher, Roll the Dice.
Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler, introduce a Elimination Chamber preview: Bischoff "At Survivor Series, you will bear witness to the elimination chamber." J.R. "What the hell is that?" Bischoff "Ingenious creation (slow: elimination chamber) from the mind of Eric Bischoff. Six Raw superstars, the elimination chamber, for the World Heavyweight Title." J.R. "At Survivor Series?" Lawler "The elimination chamber?" Bischoff "The elimination chamber." J.R. "These men may never be the same."
Raw Tonight: Booker T and Kane versus Triple H and Chris Jericho.
Commericals: Tough Enough III preview 8 Mile Mario Party 4 Game 1800CALLATT Lugz Jet X2O Game Half Past Dead GTA Vice City Taco Bell
Outside shot of the Fleet Center, and a Budweiser ad.
WWE Desire, Anthology: Saliva "King of My World." Chris Jericho video. "For those of you who don't know me, I am Chris Jericho, you new hero, your party host, and most importantly the most charismatic showman to even enter your living rooms via a television screen. Available November 12th.
Jericho and Christian are in their locker room admiring the video. "Now THAT, was a desire piece, the only one that's even worth a damn, you know why? Because it was about Chris Jericho, and the proves once again that I am not a sucker!" "You ain't not no sucka neitha!" "Yeah, and you ain't no sucker neither, you know why? Because tonight you get the chance to beat the hell out of RVD and take him out of the elimination chamber match, you got that chance. Gives me once less person to worry about at Survivor Series." "Chris ,Chris, don't worry about it. I'm gonna beat RVD so bad and so decisively that Eric Bischoff is gonna have no choice but to take him out of the elimination chamber and put me in his place. Heh heh." "You're a genius, that's a perfect idea, it gives me another person on my side to help me become the champion." "No only that, I have the chance to become the World Heavyweight Champion." Jericho thinks about this "But your not, I'm going the become the champion." "Not if I eliminate you." "Your not gonna eliminate me, I'm gonna be the champion." "What if somebody else eliminates you?" "Listen you not even in the match…" "Hey knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Elimination" HA! "Listen you smart aleck…" Christian and Jericho respectively and simultaneously "Hey I'm gonna be the World Champion, I want to be the World Champion!" "You're not even in the match yet, you don't even know what..ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-YA!" "Hey.." "YA!" Jericho leaves while Christian mutters "Sucker."
An F-View camera picks up Jericho "Ignore that, you're not a sucker, just ignore that." Jericho then runs into Triple H and Ric Flair. "Chris, that's a great music video you had there." "Well of course it was great, I was in it, that's why." "Hey we got a match tonight and uh Kane and Booker T…listen I just want you to be aware that Shawn Michaels is runnin' around here and he's probably gonna be lookin' to get involved so I just don't want you to get caught off guard, you understand?" "Shawn Michaels, huh? The HBK! The has been kid. I'd have to say that he's more you problem than mine." "Now see, that's…that's where you're wrong Chris, cause see you're involved in my match tonight, which means he's our problem if he gets involved. But don't worry cause Ric's gonna be ringside and he'll have our back." "Yeah, that's right, damn right, Shawn Michaels gets involved, he's all mine." "oh by the way, by the way Hunter, I just wanted to know, has Bischoff given your ex-wife his own little three minute warning, huh?" They walk away. "What? Seriously." Ric says "That's wrong." "I want to know." "That's wrong." As they leave, Shawn Michaels comes out of the door they were just in front of.
Commercials: Red Faction II Game Castrol GTX Spiderman Game and Movie Gateway Spiderman Movie Defender Game Reebok Raw upcoming events
Rob Van Dam (Battle Creek, MI, 235 pounds w Survivor Series ad) v World Tag Team Champion Christian (224 pounds with WWE Anthology, At Last, Christian, Available November 12th) - RVD chant. Circle - now, RVD will raise his hands for the fans. Now a lockup, nah, Christian sneaks in a kick and mocks RVD. Headlock, crank, RVD going for a hairpull, RVD tries to elbow out, Christian shot into the ropes, comes back with a shoulderblock. Off the ropes, right into a jumping spinning heel kick. Dropkick. Clothesline takes Christian out. RVD looks at the fans, feigns a run to the far rope and hits a quick baseball slide dropkick instead. Slingshot the apron, Asai Moonsault but Christian moved but RVD landed on his feet, kick to the midsection. RVD waves the fans away from the barricade, then suplexes Christian on it gut first. A couple weak punches to keep him there, back up to the apron, PTS, twisting legdrop misses, RVD hitting the barricade hamstring first because Christian had plenty of time. Christian gets RVD up, quick in and out to break the count, and RVD is thrown shoulder fist into the stairs. Christian with rights. X-Bob replay of the missed twist legdrop. RVD thrown back in, and Christina stomps. CHRIS-TI-AN. Forearm. Whip, powerslam one two no. Chinlock surfboard. RVD trying to get the fans behind him, then up - elbow, elbow, elbow, off the ropes but into the kneelift. One two no. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Ri-no he'll pose. Stomp. Choke on the middle rope. Fans are as excited as I am. RVD battling back with rights, but Christian forearms seem better. Kick is caught and RVD hits ht step over heel kick. Now he's trying to stretch out that previously injured leg muscle, which leads to a predictable conversation about hamstring and groin muscles. Both men getting to their feet, Christian's right is blocked, RVD hits a right, right, whip, RVD trips (because of his bad leg if you listen to JR, but I think his foot might've tripped over Christian's on the way by) but manages to hit the ropes anyway, manages to run back the other way, ducks a clothesline, off the ropes spinning wheel kick. Christian to the corner, RVD monkey flips him out. Running splash cover one two no. Kick, corner whip, RVD charges in with a hipblock, Christina ducks out of the way, RVD goes over the top rope, tries to the grab it to pull himself in on the way down but failing that is quickly back up and to the top rope - cross body one two no. RVD dropkick to the head, Rolling Thunder meets knees one two no. Christian goes for a reverse facelock but RVD collapses to the mat first. Christian stands him back up for the inverted backbreaker (JR - I guess I'm calling inverted reverse) one two no. Christian with some punches, but then he decides to go out. What's he want? Chair. Back in - Charles Robinson is warning Christina but Christian threatens to hit him - swung at RVD on the mat but RVD rolls out of the way. Swing 2 is stopped by Charles grabbing the chair form behind - RVD sweeps out Christina's leg while they argue. Kick, corner whip, shoulder, shoulder, flip for no reason, charge into a boot. Christian going up - but RVD hits a jumping kick to stun him. Now RVD going up to join him, but Christian eye rakes him - sunset flip bomb but RVD isn't going, instead punching, then backflipping off the middle rope to the mat. Lawler: "How did he do that on his bad leg?" Christian tries a clothesline but that's not happening - there's the off the second rope kick to the chest. RVD going back up, looks like it's time, five star frog splash connects one two three. (6:38) After the match, we get a replay of the Five Star Frog Splash.
Raw Tonight: Booker T and Kane versus Triple H and Chris Jericho.
Commercials: Show v Lesnar at Survivor Series Booker T and Hungry Man XXL Mario Party 4 Game Die Another Day Truth Tazz Wanted Game Local Ad. Friends Ad. TBS Round Table Ad.
Here comes Christopher Nowinski with his quota of enlightening comments for the show. "You know, I was really looking forward to coming back here to Boston. Cause as you all know, being the first and only Harvard graduate in WWE history, I spent many of the best years of my life here. And you know what? I just have to say that this town has completely gone down the gutter since I left. I mean what's wrong with you people. How can a town with so many institutions of higher learning be so stupid? You guys are lucky that you have people like me to rely on. Because whether you know it or not (ass-hole chant), because whether you know it or not, your lives are dictated by people like me, actual Harvard graduates. We run this town, we have to, because you combined brain power couldn't generate enough heat to melt Ted Williams' frozen corpse. 'Scuse me, did I strike a nerve? Well let me tell you something, Ted Williams was not a great man. Larry Byrd is not a great man. Monar Garcia-whatever is not a great man. I am a great man! Einstein was a great man! (Dramatic) Shakespeare was a great man, and he once said…" "What does everybody want?" So here is Al Snow to stop the verbal assault on Boston. "What are you gonna do Al? Are you gonna come in here and teach me a lesson? What don't you just ground me dad, or perhaps you'd like to do some grappling? (Here Maven hits the ring unbeknownst to Nowinski) You know what? Why don't you…why don't you just get in the ring and spank me?" "Well, Chris I didn't come down here to grapple you, and I don't think that I'm going to spank you, I think somebody else wants to do that." And here is Maven with a right, and knockdown, whip, and a dropkick, forcing Nowinski to the outside, where Snow also gives him a right and Nowinski flees through the crowd. Maven and Snow low-five in the ring.
We now see Kane pacing backstage. Goldust enters "(inhales) I want to congratulate you for tonight, you are with Booker T at tag team partners, the most fabulous man of 'em all, what do you think of that?" "I think you need to leave me alone." "But, wait a minute please, easy, easy, Eric Bischoff has banned me from ringside so I can't come down there. But I think, from one fellow freak to another, that maybe, Kane maybe you should loosen up a little bit. You know, get your freak on? Try some breathing exercises like I, like I do, like this, watch, watch (inhale), and exhale (exhale), and then (inhale) big bite…" Kane grabs his throat and slams him against the fence "Do you NOT understand about what I just said?!" Booker T enters now "Hey, hey, hey, what's going on? Kane-O, what's going on? (Goldust: cough) Look man, Survivor Series we gonna be opponents but tonight, we're partners. Look man, Triple H going around, he's spreading lies about you, everybody know that man. He playin' mind games with you, dawg. Havin' sex with a dead body, who in the hell has sex with a dead body? Come on." Goldust raises his hand timidly and they look at him. "What? I was young and stupid, come on, give me a break." Booker continues "That's another sotry. Kane-O, I need your feet on the ground tonight, dawg. I need you focused! Can you dig that?" Goldust pleads "Please say yes." "Yeah I can dig that." Kane leaves. Booker says "He gonna be all right, you all right?" Goldust claims "Yeah.." as Kane comes back with a "…SUCKAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Now Booker is sure "Ho, ho, he gonna be all right."
Shawn Michaels comes across Triple H's locker room and is going to knock, but holds back and passes it up.
Commercials: WWE Anthology ad. CSI First season Spiderman Video Ratchet and Crank Game Castrol GTX Truth Godzilla Destroy all Monsters Melee Game Stridex Day and Night Taco Bell
We are back and greeted by a graphic for the Survivor Series Theme Music by Saliva entitled "Always."
World Tag Team Champion Chris Jericho (Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada 227 pounds) and World Heavyweight Champion Triple H (Grenwich, CT, 272 pounds with Ric Flair and WWE Anthology, The Game, Triple H, Available November 12th) v Booker T (256 pounds) and Kane (326 pounds) - JR remembers that Jericho and Triple H fought all the way back at WM, Lawler points out that Booker T and Kane are just as much opponents at Survivor Series. Circle. Juke and Jive! Lockup, no Jericho with a knee, right, right, chop, knee, right to the neck, turnbuckle smash. "I remember, so vividly, in Las Vegas, Booker T wins a cage match and after that, he gets his head knocked busted open by Chris Jericho." JR fails to tell us who the cage match was against. Whip, reversed into a thrust kick from Booker. Chops and punches form Booker - whip, back elbow. Yell. Chop. Corner whip, reversed, Jericho charge into a back elbow. Booker charges out with a clothesline, but slowly gets dropped with a sleeper neckbreaker. Tag to Hunter. Kick. Right. Right. Right. Booker fighting back with rights, whip, reversed, clothesline misses, Booker back with a clothesline. Corner whip, reversed, Brock out with a clothesline. Yell - do the fans want to see Kane. Close enough. Tag to Kane, tag to Jericho, because Hunter doesn't want to be in any more. Jericho runs into a big boot, and a big toss into the corner. Kane charge sin with a clothesline, Jericho ducks, turns, punches, chops. Corner whip, reversed, Jericho rebounds into a double choke lift - held up there for one two three and dropped. Announcers discuss how the Katie Vick video wasn't funny, but the Hurricane video was. Kane working Jericho over in the corner with rights and back elbows. Corner whip, Kane charge into a boot. Jericho to the second rope - missile dropkick hits one two no. "C'mon on Ref!" Ref is Hebner. Jericho with kicks to the Kane's head - whip, flapjack. Hunter in to get a clothesline. Kane tries to press Jericho but has trouble getting him up - meanwhile, Ric distracts Earl so Hunter can clip out Kane's leg.. Booker in to get after Triple H but now Earl's turned back and is stopping him. Kane struggles to get up, and Triple H grabs his legs around the ring post. Kane reaches to block being crotched and read after Triple H, and doesn't notice Jericho walking around with a char - chair shot to the left ankle. Triple H pulls Kane back into the middle of the ring. Quick "Katie Vick" chant from the fans as Hunter drops the elbow on the inside of Kane's injured leg. Knee to the knee. Again. Triple H holds him by the leg as Kane goes up, tag to Jericho, and Jericho kicks the bad leg. Sit down on the leg, Kane is standing on one leg, which keeps him open for Jericho to kick the other one - clip to that left leg again. Juke and Jive. Off the ropes, clip a third time. More juking and jiving. Off the ropes, right into the clothesline. Booker T is telling Kane to get up, but Jericho pulls him back and tags out to Triple H. Stomp. Knee driver, right into the mat. Again. Earl checks if Kane wants to quit. JR brings up Triple H being awarded the title, and Lawler complains about that being brought up again - "who all has he defended it against?" JR: "There's a few left - there's a few left." Meanwhile, Triple H is very slowly getting on a figure four - there you go. Reach to Jericho for leverage, barely breaking in time for Hebner not to notice. Jericho claims he was holding the tag rope the whole time. JR: "Is Earl losing his hearing? The fans are telling him..." Again with the leverage, but Hebner caught it this time. Triple H breaks at tags out to Jericho. Kick to the bad leg, kick, off the ropes, right into a side slam. Kane needs the tag. Tag to Triple H, and he manages to elbow drop Kane before Kane can make the tag. Both men pick up Kane - double suplex, blocked, blocked, double suplex the other way! On one leg! Crawling - tag to Booker. Right for Hunter, right for Chris, clothesline for Hunter, clothesline for Chris. Whip for Hunter, backdrop. Clothesline for Chris. Corner whip, reversed, corner bodyscissors rollup one two NO. Clothesline for Hunter. Big spinebuster for Jericho. Booker looks at his hand - no, shot for Flair on the apron anyway. Hunter up, Booker ducks a right and hits a jumping side kick on Hunter. Now he's looking at his hand again - yes, the Spinarooni. Off the ropes, double clothesline for both. Another shot for Flair. Clothesline out for Jericho. Triple H staggered - there's the scissors kick. One two NO Jericho breaks it up. Jericho with a double leg takedown on Booker - turning him, over, Walls of Jericho - but here's Kane's "top rope" clothesline. Kane takes Jericho out of the ring and smashes him into the apron - but Jericho drop toe holds him in the corner. Hebner is on the apron watching this, while Hunter reverses a Booker whip right into him. Hunter's clothesline misses, Booker hits a jumping thrust kick. Going up - waiting for Triple to get up - missile dropkick is sidestepped (mostly - Triple H waves it away then grabs himself.) Kick to the leg, Pedigree but the fans yell - HBK, Sweet Chin Music. Hey Shawn, are you going to dance or are you going to be helpful - ah, he throws Earl back in, one two three (10:26) After the match, we have a replay of Michaels and the Sweet Chin Music, to secure the win for Booker T and Kane.
Now Shawn Michaels is at the head of the stage. "Boston, long time no see. It's great to see you again, good night. Oh, wh, wait a minute. I've got a question to answer don't I? Last week, Eric Bischoff invited me to be a part of Survivor Series, to be a part of the elimination chamber, to have a chance at the World Heavyweight Championship. Decisions, decisions, decisions. Let's see, (on the one hand) HBK, (on the other) Survivor Series, (thinking fingers) first ever elimination chamber match, (shrugs) main event, Madison square Garden for the World Heavyweight Championship, (scratches head) my goodness, well the answer is yes! And Triple H, just so you understand, it's been four years since HBK has been in Madison Square Garden, I can assure you, I'm walking out of the Garden, walking out of that chamber match the new World Heavyweight Champion." We hear his music, we see him dancing, we see the RawZone credits, we fade to black, and see the closing WWE Entertainment fade.
Wait, so in deference to TWGTT, that made Kurt Angle the equivalent of Shari Lewis and turned Shelton into Lamb Chop. Is that right? There's only one other thing to say about this week's column: NEEDS MORE MANTAUR!