FOOTAGE! of Evolution taking control last week, the lowly faces sticking together, Orton losing, and the lowly faces getting the last laugh.
Fighting evil by moonlight, winning love by daylight, never running from a real fight, because it is time to WAKE UP! And it is time for Raw, live from Peoria, IL...and a Fashion Report, too!
Snitsky, in black undies, pushing a stroller laden with street signs, with FOOTAGE! of destroying Kane at Taboo Tuesday, vs. Eugene, in the back consulted by Regal. Eugene wears the inside-out white jacket and blue undies. It's a hardcore match, with Jack Doan, in the stripes, officiating Yes - I love the no-babies sign. Pumphandle slam->pin. Slow, really more about the hardware. Post-match, Snitsky tries to injure Eugene, but Regal, in black suit, white shirt and red-streaked tie, drives him off.
Somewhere, HHH, in black suit, white shirt and tie, the Title over his shoulder, gives a message to the lowly faces who brought it last week. Actually, HHH isn't in the arena. He promises that Evolution will change peoples' minds (forcibly, I assume).
JR, in black suit, white shirt, and black hat and tie, and Lawler, in black suit and red shirt, looking at the pictures, introduce BlondeBimbo, in sparkly red dress with spaghetti straps. BlondeBimbo interviews Tajiri, in black pants with left leg dragon and blue-fire right hem. Flair scares off BlondeBimbo and Batista attacks Tajiri from behind.
Flair, in black suit and blue shirt, and Batista, in black pinstriped suit, white shirt, shades, and tie make their way to the ring. There, Flair demands respect for HHH and some changes to Raw. Out comes Bisch, greyheaded, in black suit and black shirt, to book Survivor Series. Christian! vs. Benjamin for the IC Title. Lita vs. Trish for the Women's Title. Jericho, Benoit, Maven, and Orton vs. Snitsky, Batista, HHH, and Edge in an elimination match. Bisch shows some spine, standing-up to Evolution. Bombshell - the winning side of the elimination match will have control of Raw for the month after Survivor Series. Batista speaks against such a plan, but Bisch doesn't care.
Christian!, in black tights with silver "C"s over pink crests, vs. Hurricane, in his Hurri-gear. Chad "I'll allow it" Patton referees. During the match, Edge, in black "Edge" faceprint tshirt and red tights, comes to the stage and dominates the segment. Christian! wins. Post-match, Shelton, in blue fullcuts attacks. Christian! then brings-out Viscera, in black, to down Shelton.
Todd Grisham interviews Edge. Benoit is on the scene to tell Edge to take a hike and not bother to show for the Tag Title match tonight.
Meanwhile, Maven, all alone, barges into the Evolution lockerroom to trade some verbal barbs. Evolution talks back, but stop short when, suddenly, Randy and Jericho arrive.
Oh, great, just when I had forgotten about that fuck, it's Simon Dean, in babyblue sweat suit, with his crap in the ring. He talks smack to the crowd - such witty stuff. Witty if you were raised in a cave by the most vanilla of banal grandparents. Go fuck yourselves, WW - I'm flippin the channel. (I'll just guess what happens - more "wit", followed by Simon doing something to get heel heat.)
La Resistance, in blue vests and white "La Resistance" undies, waving flags, vs. Benoit, in blue "4Real" tights with black slashes, the Tag Title over his shoulder. Mike Chioda officiates, in stripes. Mid-match, Edge comes out, with remixed music. When Benoit is dumb enough to go for the tag, Edge walks off. That opens a slot for AdBreak.
Cont. Edge is on commentary. AuRevoir->pin. Post-match, Edge attacks Benoit.
In Bisch's Room of Fun, Flair and Dave confront Bisch.
Towelhead and Towelhead Jr. have a pretaped message. Flip.
JR and Lawler run-down the Survivor Series card. Earlier tonight, Viscera attacked Shelton.
Presently, Shelton is walking in the back, his ribs taped.
Benjamin vs. Viscersa. Jack Doan officiates. Fuck, do you WANT me to quit watching, WW?
Trish, in bust-emphasizing top and black pants, the Women's Title on her shoulder, is in the ring. Lita, in black moth-eaten mesh top and camo pants, comes out to violence Trish. Then Gail, in black tanktop and white skirt, is out to hold Lita whilst Trish beats some sense into her. My question - what the hell did Lita do to deserve a title shot? Fuck, if I could abort a fetus and get a promotion, I would seriously think of it (too bad I can't get pregnant...or is it?).
What the fuck is the deal with Nike's "Chamber of Fear" ad campaign? What the fuck is the chamber of fear? What the fuck does it have to do with basketball? Who the fuck is that basketball player? Why do I give a fuck? What the fuck is up with me saying "fuck" so much? Fuck fuck fuckity fucking fuck.
Jericho, in purple reel tights, Maven in red "M" crotch "Maven" undies, and Randy, in black "Orton" undies with red hip scrawls vs. Flair, in black sequined and feathered robe, red "RF" undies thereunder, and Batista, in gold flaming crotch "Batista" undies. Chad "I'll allow it" Patton is the referee.
Overall: I'll be brutally honest. This show was a festering pile of crap. I couldn't keep from flipping away during the second hour. Seriously. If you're on the west coast, think of giving this a pass. Yeah, I ditched early to catch The Daily Show. Have I become that jaded? Or is it just that this show totally sucked?
PS: All citizens of the United States should vote tomorrow, if eligible. Do your civic duty, motherfuckers!
Some people need to learn how to take a joke. I'm ScreamingHeadGuy, and I approve this post.
Originally posted by ScreamingHeadGuyWhat the fuck is the deal with Nike's "Chamber of Fear" ad campaign? What the fuck is the chamber of fear? What the fuck does it have to do with basketball? Who the fuck is that basketball player?
Two weeks of the babyfaces winning, two weeks of sweet finishes. Is it really that difficult, Vince?
OK, which would you rather have - Booker T as WWE Champion, or a month of Evolution getting what they deserve at the booking hands of the babyfaces? For me, it's the latter, and it's not even close. Sorry, Booker but anything that brings down Triple H from his pedestal has to take precedence.
For the first time in a while, Raw Was Sewage. How is Snitsky connected to Evolution/Edge vs. Dudes With Attitude? And, wouldn't it have made a slight bit more sense to announce Edge being on the heel side after he attacked Benoit and cost him the tag belt, not prior? I'll go out on a limb: Edge's book won't get nearly the sales of Flair's book. Nice of Vince to at least not give us the 20 minute Go Vote speech he gave in 2000, which in hindsight was one of the precipes of the decline. Maven is the second coming of Greg Gagne, except he doesn't have a talented father, or the talent or charisma of Greg Gagne. Or even the dropkick of Gagne. Once the tickets on sale for Raw in Charlotte came on the screen, the Flair is turning face sign should have been shown in Neon letters. Simon Dean: I wonder if he'll take credit in inventing one of the dullest segments in wrestling history. With the housecleaning today, why is Mabel still around? At least use Kamala in that role, as at least he might get some sort of reaction from the crowd.
It was Lebron James, and the ad campaign seems to be capitalizing on the youth's excitement for Kung Fu-pastiche as the whole thing seems to be told in a Tarantino/Kill Bill different type of storytelling for every section manner. To keep this about wrestling, RAW was pretty awful. Maven and Gene Snitsky have no place in that Survivor Series match. I haven't seen a pay-per-view card since WMXX that made me say "Wow, I need to see that pay-per-view.", and I used to go to every pay-per-view at the local Hooters. When did everything go so far South?
I too was surprised that they put Snitsky in there. I guess they're going with Flair versus Tajiri on the card as well? It seemed to me that it would be the perfect opportunity to turn someone face that they'd been looking to turn face -- put 'em with Evolution/Edge and let them screw things up and get attacked on Raw after Survivor Series. No way they're doing that with Snitsky. Probably just someone to be the first one eliminated. Telegraphs the winner, however. Like they're gonna give a new guy control of Raw for a day.
Originally posted by HokienauticTelegraphs the winner, however. Like they're gonna give a new guy control of Raw for a day.
Actually, I think the finish is plenty telegraphed without Snitsky's presence. There's no way they build up the revolt and the babyfaces getting revenge for nearly a month only for Evolution to win - again - when it counts. Besides, we've had to put up with two-plus years of Bischoff's blatant heel pandering, so it'll be good to have a month off from that. :)
I thought it was better than last week. Of course, I thought last week was bilge.
Guess I was easily amused by watching the camera guy hastily turn an inch to the right every time that woman at ringside gave Simon Dean the bird. When did WWE suddenly become delicate about showing middle fingers?
Hardcore matches are ok in moderation, which made this one a bit more tolerable than usual....At least we only had one, short Triple H pointless promo for the night....Not quite impressed with the new interview lady....Nice of them to stop making Bischoff's character such a wuss, but he could be just standing up to Evolution because Trips wasn't there....
Flair's promo style is getting really weird. He emphasizes each word and it is really tough to understand. And how could he NOT call that guy in the grey t-shirt in the front row "fat boy!"?...I guess we know how much the 'Cane/Christian match mattered, having Edge plug his book all the while....I must say, I was surprised by Viscera's return....
I liked how the cameraman kept panning over when the Simon Dean lady flipped him off....The tag title match was okay, I suppose, but having Edge come out just to jump off the apron was awkward. If he'd have been there the whole match, it would've been better....I don't like where this Arab tag team is going. Of course, WWE could say they introduced them as good guys, but the FANS booed them, so it wasn't their fault (tm Snitsky)....
The Lita montage was great, if only because it involved Essa Rios....Final tag match was okay, but an uneventful RAW despite the S.S. matches announced.
Screw "one night only" -- we want Viscera! I don't know whether it was just because he was happy to be back on TV again or what, but he seemed to be as mobile and active as he's ever been in his career. Or maybe it's just credit to Benjamin that the match wasn't terrible when it very well could have been. Who knows? Alls I know is, damn it, I want Gangrel back too while we're at it.
I was intrigued by JR's use of the term "free agent" when talking about Viscera; it would be interesting to have a few designated free agents hopping between Raw and SD from time to time. A heel on either show needs some temporary muscle backing him up, he calls in the Ministry of Freelance and off they go. That'd be kind of entertaining, which means they won't do it and I'm going to be sad. Ah, well. Nothing new.
A nice little touch this week was having a Raw Replay sponsored by the Simon System. That was cute.
Edge is doing very well as a heel, and he was gold on commentary tonight. I like how he's developing.
And Tajiri did very well as Triple H, while I'm at it. Had I my way they would extend it a while -- have him wear the outfit and scurry around for a few weeks, bugging Evolution and striking HHH poses during matches and whatnot. Heh.
* I guess I was the only one who kinda liked the Simon Dean thing. The character reminded me of this guy who I used to work out with at my gym. I still have a tough time looking at that guy realizing that was Nova from ECW.
* I am curious where they go with these Arab characters. I know the smaller guy is a wrestler too but will he be used as a tag team or will Magnus (that is who Mohammad is right?) be a singles guy?
* I think Viscera would be better than Tomko also. It would be nice to see Vis/Gangrel tag team on RAW, mostly b/c I love Gangrel's theme music/entrance (how can that music not get you psyched up?)
*Snitsky did a good job getting over his heelness. To me, he has a lot of charisma and has a great look. Now for the wrestling thing....
*Man, Regal has really, REALLY started to get over. Too bad they will never take advantage of it. The exchange b/w Regal/Eugene was the moment of the night for me.
*Finally, was I the only person waiting for Christian to come out of the ring and kick Edge's ass?
"I know a great deal about the Middle East because I've been raising Arabian horses for over 20 years, I've researched the culture for most of my life."--Patrick Swayze on Iraq
TaJJJiri was comedy gold. Snitsky's sign choices were also lovely, although he needed a BABY ON BOARD!. Overall not a really gripping raw, but an enjoyable enough one.
Two worries, though:
Where the heck are they going with Mr. Arab American? It seemed like a face appeal approach, but there was enough snide in the attitude to make the (hopefully not racist..) crowd turn on it in a heartbeat. Knowing Vince, odds are they're just being edgy for its own sake and have no actual plan...
Since we've seen the faces dominating Evolution repeatedly, does this mean we can assume Evolution wins at Survivor Series and we get another few months of the McMahon-Hemsley Facgime type garbage? Every time HHH comes out to brag about his power or his skill I clicky through on the Tivo. Not because I hate him. It's just really boring and I've seen it hundreds of times before. They need to freshen up.
I thought RAW was pretty blah. There is no way that the Dudes with Attitudes win Survivor Series. We will have to deal with Evolution winning and the continued beatdown of Randy Orton until he wins the Rumble and a title shot at Wrestlemania.
My one big love of RAW is heel Trish. She is so much a better heel that a face. I loved the whole Lita video montage. Classic and true.
Originally posted by ScreamingHeadGuyI can be, and I am. (I don't watch basketball)
That's two of us. Until I read further down this thread, I thought it might be Shaq, having not paid much attention to the commercials.
“Back in 2000 a Republican friend warned me that if I voted for Al Gore and he won, the stock market would tank, we'd lose millions of jobs, and our military would be totally overstretched. You know what? I did vote for Gore, he did win, and I'll be damned if all those things didn't come true!" -- James Carville
WWE.com is packaging the new Arab-Americans on their site thusly:
New Arab-American characters to make debut on Monday Night RAW
According to article on parents.wwe.com posted earlier today, WWE is introducing two new Arab-American characters on Monday Night RAW. Muhammad Hassan and Khosrow Daivari are U.S. citizens who have grown up in America. They love their country. However, they now face a new and different kind of relationship with their fellow U.S. citizens as a result of being Arab-American in a United States still struggling with the tragic events of September 11, 2001. RAW will explore the challenges Hassan and Daivari face as Hassan tries to make his mark as a new WWE Superstar under the guidance of Daivari as his manager.
I'm assuming we'll see some trademark subtle poltical satire with these new guys involving La Resistance.
"To be the man, you gotta beat demands." -- The Lovely Mrs. Tracker
I thought the show was hysterical from Edge's commentary to Triple Tajiri. I also don't think it would be in HHH's best interest for his team to win since Edge is big thing is his "destiny" to win the world title. I'm also sure that Snistky would want a title shot to and don't be surprised of Batista wants out after his shove of Flair. In any case, I look forward to the match since Snistky and maybe Maven are the only dead weight in that one. Compared to Kurt/Eddie's team match, I don't know what they can do with Kurt's team beside them job them out. Overall a good show.
Decent RAW. Simon Dean took a while to get rolling but eventually seemed to generate some real heat. Actually using the word "penis" made me laugh.
Triple Tajiri was great, even though it was tough to see him spit the green mist rather than the water, which would have been a nice visual.
When I first saw the Arab-American team on there, I cringed. All well and good to make fun of the French, but I assumed they were going for straight heel-esque stuff a la Tiger Singh..
What grabbed me though was the at worst neutral tenor of the "Muhammad Hassan" character. Spoke English, and didn't say anything too heelish that I remember. Then he turns it over to Daivari who, even though we have no idea what he's saying, appears to be ranting and raving in a very heel-like manner. From that my hope is that they will not just play a stupid "arab heel" angle, but using Hassan as a neutral guy with face tendencies, being led astray by his radical and militant heel manager. I wouldn't mind that.
Something tells me it's not a flaming 2x4 wrapped in barbed wire. I guess in the context of a world title match, turning the other cheek isn't the ideal option. Unless you're Rikishi (rimshot) I won't say Jesus *couldn't* save a match like that.