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The W - Pro Wrestling - Raw #1055 8/12/13
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JustinShapiro
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Since: 12.12.01
From: Pittsburgh, PA

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#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.79
TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT bright lights can't miss yeah we ... I have no idea what the Raw lyrics are now.

    Originally posted by Shapiro, Justin
    2013 : 2011
    Los Angeles : Los Angeles
    Cena : Cena
    Bryan : Punk
    HHH : HHH
    Vince : Vince
    Orton : Del Rio
    Shield : Nash
    Maddox : Laurinaitis


You didn't have to take me that literally. Triple H is now the referee for Cena/Bryan. We've known all month there was bullshit coming after the WWE title match but I hoped they'd have a normal classic title match before that point. Now it looks like Controversy is coming before and after the finish.

The Cena/Bryan segment was very long and featured 1-3 other guys who didn't need to be there, but one of the big stories of Bryan's main event push has been not the great matches (duh), not the crowd reaction (now a given), but how comfortable he's been doing promos in WWE Talky Men segments. That's the only thing that was going to keep him from being in the Top Guy Club going forward. Meltzer: "Actually, Vince believes he took a guy who was very good technically but had no personality and taught him how to be a star." Vince may be a tad deluded on Daniel Bryan's career arc, but if that's the case, it couldn't be better news for Bryan as a player in this league. He's a Vince creation!

While aspects of the Wrestler vs. Parody stuff run calamitously close to Masked Man Grantland column horseshit, the feud (and perhaps some bro'ing out with DB on private jet rides for Total Divas shoots) has brought out the dormant good side of Cena's interviews. Sort of oddity: as part of the shooty half-truth world they've been living in, the Bellas never came up once all month, and neither did SummerSlam 2010, at least not Cena's part in bringing him back. Yet ... somehow Antonio Inoki did.

Within reasonable concessions of McMahon Saga Stuff having to occur, I think I'd like to see Cena, Bryan, and HHH all clear the ring of the Shield at the climax, then Cena getting Bryan in the AA and getting small packaged. Bryan wins the title. Orton comes out to cash in on exhausted Bryan. Cena turns around from up the ramp and lays Randy out so he can't because He Ultimately Is That Good A Guy.

With the sudden push he's gotten this month and now the career retrospective video they gave him tonight, I am genuinely concerned that Christian has contracted a terminal disease.

What was Big Show wearing, some of Sheamus' golf gear? Show and Mark Henry are pretty kindred spirits this year. Fake face turn, doublecross, real face turn.

I have no idea what happened at the end of the Natalya/AJ tag match, or how.

    Originally posted by me
    Sadly Ariane made no attempt this week to turn thebomb.com and Girl Bye into her recurring catchphrases.


heck yeah that's the stuff

(edited by JustinShapiro on 13.8.13 0015)
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Since: 20.6.02
From: I am the Tag Team Champions!

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#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.38
Ok, I had a little something typed up. Let's cut and paste here:

-----------------

The final Summerslam buildup is here and we obviously start with Cena/Bryan, which led to a fantastic Miz TV segment that featured a heartfelt back-and-forth between both guys. One of the best promos of the year, especially on Bryan's end, as he's selling this as the biggest match of his life before offering up the Japanese custom of the mutual face slap. This was all phenomenal...until we got the requisite cameos from Triple H and Randy Orton.

Oh, and speaking of which, Cena/Bryan could easily tear the house down on their own merits, but this company is just DETERMINED to Sports Entertainment(tm) the shit out of this match and there's nothing anyone can do about it! Vince teases making Brad Maddox into the special ref, until Triple H comes out and Pedigrees him to oblivion to make himself the special referee. This is SO not necessary! Between Vince, Hunter, Maddox, and Orton all floating around, this match has HUGE clusterfuck potential and I don't like it one bit.

The rest of the show was pretty weak. We got the 20-man Battle Royale, with the winner getting the U.S. title shot. Rob Van Dam won that one by eliminating Mark Henry. The two tried to have a mutual respect moment, until they got surrounded by the Shield. Big Show FINALLY makes his return and I guess is a babyface again.

Main event CM Punk/Paul Heyman match obviously doesn't happen. Heyman brings out Brock and brags about setting a grand trap for Punk and he goes on and on and ON about it for OVER TEN MINUTES of basically repeating the same thing over and over and over, stopping short of holding up a neon sign that says "Punk's coming from the other direction!" And sure enough, Punk DOES come from the other direction and destroys Brock with a TV camera to end the show!

We also have our single WORST MATCH OF THE YEAR, as Khali and Natalya beat Big E and AJ in a finish that couldn't have possibly been planned. I have no idea who botched this finish to high hell, though the top suspect is Black Ref. Dolph Ziggler was shown backstage in a five-second cutaway. Thanks for showing up, Dolph!

This couples very well with one of the worst SEGMENTS of the year, as Truth and Fandango did...something. It was supposed to be a match, I think, but it never got started and they...kinda fought...and Fandango said his name and it was all a HUMONGOUS waste of time! This would be egregious for any other week, but this is supposedly the go-home show for the 2nd biggest show of the year! What the hell!

Randy Orton beat Damien Sandow in a good match, but nothing we haven't seen a hundred times already. Notable for Cody Rhodes doing commentary, with Cole, Lawler, and JBL completely BURYING his face turn and making him look like a dope. When you need somebody knocked down several pegs, just call Michael Cole!

Alberto Del Rio beat Kofi Kingston clean. We're one week in and poor Kofi's right back to wandering aimlessly with no feud of consequence. You know...Ryback's RIGHT THERE and he's not doing anything either! Would a revenge feud kill them? Even if Kofi came out on the losing end of that feud, at least it would look like he's DOING SOMETHING!

Yeah, that's all I've got. I'm sure you'll all cover anything I missed.



LostInUbe
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Since: 19.11.02
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#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.55
    Originally posted by JustinShapiro


    While aspects of the Wrestler vs. Parody stuff run calamitously close to Masked Man Grantland column horseshit


I'm sure that column was already in the works when you typed that up.

I wanted the crowd to start a "You don't deserve it" chant at Cena but it could have been misinterpreted as being towards Daniel Bryan as well. Of course that point was undercut by Triple H coming in right after without letting it sink in.

Cena telling Miz that his Miz TV segments are usually trainwrecks while true seemed a bit uncalled for.



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#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 9.47
Maybe the SWERVE will be Triple H calling it right down the middle and having no impact on the ending of the match.

(Without hope, what have we?)

(I also can't believe I managed to keep a straight face as I typed that.)



SKLOKAZOID
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Since: 20.3.02
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#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.45
I dunno, they already did the HHH as Guest Ref Controversy/MITB Cash-In ending two years ago. Is it too much for me to be the super optimist and think that it all works out? That HHH redeems his bad officiating from two years prior and Bryan manages to eek out a clean win, then Orton tries to cash in, but HHH just Pedigrees him and Bryan pins him, removing the threat of a RAW cash-in?

I mean, they can do all of that, and then Vince can have a problem with it, leading to Bryan getting screwed down the road at Survivor Series, leading to a Bryan Rumble win and definitive title victory at WrestleMania xXx. You know, so we can all live in a perfect world.


Hey, Big Show is back!


Anyone else feel The Shield getting sorta played down after being so important? Amrbose/RVD is better than a pre-show match. Especially if they're doing that Divas match.


I re-watched that Natalya/AJ mixed tag finish three times, and it was hilarious every single time. Because of the camerawork, I couldn't see if the ref legitimately didn't see the tap, but the funniest part was Natalya grabbing the ref's arm and awkwardly standing for a moment, before walking - while continuing to hold his hand, and finishing the match in the exact same way. Wow. I haven't seen a botch that blatant in a while. Was there supposed to be an actual match? Because Big E and Khali just stood on the apron the whole time and did all their stuff post-match. It was weird.
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#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.71
    Originally posted by CRZ
    Maybe the SWERVE will be Triple H calling it right down the middle and having no impact on the ending of the match.

    (Without hope, what have we?)

    (I also can't believe I managed to keep a straight face as I typed that.)


He does, and shrugs when Orton cashes in, allowing HHH/Bryan to happen.



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Amos Cochran
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Since: 28.8.09

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#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.74
    Originally posted by SKLOKAZOID
    Anyone else feel The Shield getting sorta played down after being so important? Amrbose/RVD is better than a pre-show match. Especially if they're doing that Divas match.


Apparently Rollins didn't shake Big Show's hand properly.

I wish that was a joke.

Weak show aside from the big stuff, but that Cena/Bryan promo was off-the-charts good. I hope CRZ is spot on with his prediction of the swerve.
lotjx
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Since: 5.9.08

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#8 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.12
The bad build could lead to a great Summerslam or we get SummerSlam 2011 and watch Bryan's momentum get killed by another former member of the HHH's BFF society while HHH looks on. The complete irony to all of this is if Punk makes the save for Bryan. If Bryan wins which I think is not going to happen.

(edited by lotjx on 13.8.13 0713)


The Wee Baby Sheamus.Twitter: @realjoecarfley its a bit more toned down there. A bit.
Tenken347
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Since: 27.2.03
From: Parts Unknown

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#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.97
You are not wanted here, HHH! I was actually angry at my tv when his music started playing. Cena and Bryan had me good and drawn in, and it was like HHH couldn't stand the idea of two guys getting so much heat without him. I'm more or less okay with with Orton playing Third Man of Intrigue (although, the way they're telegraphing the cash-in here means there must be some kind of twist), but HHH is just so unnecessary and so counter to everything that actually makes this match compelling.

On the other hand, hey look at that. Two guys are feuding over the WWE World Championship as though it has some kind of intrinsic value that demonstrates their worth as professional wrestlers. How about that?
Amos Cochran
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Since: 28.8.09

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#10 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.74
I'm not sure why everyone's bummed about the possibility of Bryan replicating Punk's SummerSlam 2011 "loss of momentum". He won the WWE title back three months later and held it for almost a year and a half, turning himself into the second biggest fulltime guy in the company.
lotjx
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Since: 5.9.08

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#11 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.12
    Originally posted by Amos Cochran
    I'm not sure why everyone's bummed about the possibility of Bryan replicating Punk's SummerSlam 2011 "loss of momentum". He won the WWE title back three months later and held it for almost a year and a half, turning himself into the second biggest fulltime guy in the company.


During that time, Punk also lost to HHH and then became best buddies with HHH even though his entire Pipe Bomb was HHH is one of the worst things to happen to wrestling right now. The other being his wife. I don't think Punk recovered as much as people think he did. As you said, he was second banana to Cena and then since WWE refused to do anything about it, they turned him heel and everything Punk stood for became a joke. Yes, he had that really good Wrestelmania match, but his matches with Rock were not great and let us not even speak of the Ryback feud.

It really all goes back to HHH. Granted that has been the IWC bitchfeast since 2002, but in this case its true. No one was screaming for HHH or anyone else to get into this Bryan/Cena match. I am not that thrilled about the Orton thing either, but it makes sense. It really doesn't make sense for HHH to be in this thing. Cena has had about a billion wrestling matches half of them some evil GM was behind it, nothing about this one makes it any less different.

(edited by lotjx on 13.8.13 0752)


The Wee Baby Sheamus.Twitter: @realjoecarfley its a bit more toned down there. A bit.
ges7184
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Since: 7.1.02
From: Birmingham, AL

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#12 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.00
    Originally posted by JustinShapiro

    I have no idea what happened at the end of the Natalya/AJ tag match, or how.


One thing that clearly happened was Natalya actually let go of the hold BEFORE AJ tapped. Looked like to me the ref was just going to go along with it, because he did call for the bell, but it never did ring, and I guess somebody told him they needed to redo the finish.

The funny thing is during the second attempt, Natalya started to release the hold again before AJ tapped, and had to quickly reapply the hold when she realized the same thing was about to happen. (not sure why Natalya was in such a hurry)



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Since: 19.8.05
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#13 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.97
They may have been the best promo I have ever seen by Bryan or Cena. I loved the final segment too, and am wondering which match will go on last. The one that has HHH, maybe?

I also thought the Shield promo was killer as well. Wonder if Dean will get heat for calling himself the best in the world, and Cena's belt a trophy?

Great promos, but the wrestling mostly sucked. That's a go home show for you.
Mayhem
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Since: 25.4.03
From: Nashville, TN

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#14 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.72

It looks like Big Show has lost weight & he was just wearing his old fat clothes ...

Anyone else buy that the double teaming of Kofi by the Real Americans is a set-up for the return of Evan Bourne/the reuniting of Air Boom?
Dr Unlikely
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#15 Posted on | Instant Rating: 9.27
The content of what Cena says is still off-putting in ways that I'm not sure it's fully meant to be (invoking the Make-A-Wish kids as part of a "you have no right to call me out" speech is a strange piece of business for anybody), but that was John Cena: #1 Guy In Wrestling on full display there. That was a fully-formed character cutting a promo at highest-possible level, selling the idea that he is, now, functionally the Greatest WWE Superstar of All Time (short of beating up Bruno and ending The Streak, which last night's promo perfectly set up as something Cena needs to try) and that whether he wants to acknowledge it or not, arrogance is every bit as much of what makes Cena #1 as hustle and loyalty are.

I think Bryan wilted a little bit in the face of Peak Cena, but I don't blame him as much as I do the writing. They gave him the wrong word. Cena's not a "Parody", he's a Brand. The guy literally cut a "My Shirt Is The American Flag!" promo and means it (and sold the hell out of the idea that he means it earnestly without fully realizing what he's about himself). Bryan just needed someone to give him a little help in refining his point about Cena never knowing what it's like to identify as something other than a Superstar. (Which could have set up Cena's real point, that for Bryan to actually beat Cena, he has to become that Brand. To beat the man, you gotta be The Man, for better or worse.)

HHH coming out and HHH-ing it up is a bummer, as are all the other McMahon and Orton things floating around, but Cena was so into that promo last night that I'm hoping he plays the same card he did the night of the Punk piledriver match on Raw and he and Bryan just do their thing for as long as they can get away with it.

Bryan needs to beat Cena after that, though. Needs to. I don't think Cena cuts that promo if he's not planning on putting Bryan over, for however short a window that may be.

Punk/Brock was great again, though Heyman was indeed a little weaker than usual (Paul Heyman Battle Gear aside). But Brock sold that beating (and being confused that it could have possibly happened) well and the man looks terrifying even when it looks like he's about to die. Best build for a match in a long, long time, and motivated Punk is always great TV.

Some other random thoughts:
-Kofi's sunset flip save on Cesaro during the battle royal was ludicrous and awesome.

-Not doing Ryback vs. RVD as a feud seems weird every time they're near each other.

-Mark Henry, reluctant face, is good. Show randomly reappearing and just kind of standing there with Henry and RVD was not as good. I wanted a real Henry/Usos vs. Shield match, just for the potential "I say U-" "YOU KEEP YOUR BILLS PAID!" entrance.

-I don't know how intentional it was, but the promo Ambrose did was really solid and nicely sets up a (hopefully) inevitable direct feud of some kind with Ambrose as the most dangerous kind of angry indy guy (someone way more violent and less rational than Punk and Bryan) vs. John Cena - Superstar In Decline. Ambrose really needs to embrace the Joker thing he has going, as he is the problem that Cena can't solve, the guy who doesn't want to be Cena, doesn't want to beat him, but would happily just ruin everything. Cena's line in the sand is "If I can't wrestle in WWE, I won't wrestle at all", and Ambrose's developing point should and could be "If I can't wrestle in WWE, no one else will, either".

-I, too, have created The Ghost Of Andre The Giant in TNM and Smackdown games. We are kindred spirits, you and I, Dean Ambrose.

-Kane surrounding the ring with fire so that no one can help Wyatt can only lead to one thing: Sin Cara doing his trampoline entrance over the fire into the ring to help Bray and join the Wyatt family and wearing Bray Wyatt hats over his mask.
Matt Tracker
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Since: 8.5.03
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#16 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.85
I am the dumbest kind of wrestling fan because I have hopes now for a Barrett push. He worked the crowd after Mania (complete with the Cactus Jack bang-bang gesture) and got the IC belt and then nothing.

The inclusion of HHH in the main event actually deters me from getting the PPV. Only Lesnar/Punk is tempting me to buy it.

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Since: 2.1.02
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#17 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.58
Read it and weep, fella


    Originally posted by ges7184
      Originally posted by JustinShapiro

      I have no idea what happened at the end of the Natalya/AJ tag match, or how.


    One thing that clearly happened was Natalya actually let go of the hold BEFORE AJ tapped. Looked like to me the ref was just going to go along with it, because he did call for the bell, but it never did ring, and I guess somebody told him they needed to redo the finish.

    The funny thing is during the second attempt, Natalya started to release the hold again before AJ tapped, and had to quickly reapply the hold when she realized the same thing was about to happen. (not sure why Natalya was in such a hurry)
This is exactly what happened. The first time, I almost felt like maybe one of them was legit injured so Nattie wanted to release the hold as soon as possible. Then it happened AGAIN and she released the hold early AGAIN and I didnt know what the hell was happening.



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kentish
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Since: 19.8.05
From: My Old Kentucky Home

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#18 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.97
    Originally posted by DJ FrostyFreeze
      Originally posted by ges7184
        Originally posted by JustinShapiro

        I have no idea what happened at the end of the Natalya/AJ tag match, or how.


      One thing that clearly happened was Natalya actually let go of the hold BEFORE AJ tapped. Looked like to me the ref was just going to go along with it, because he did call for the bell, but it never did ring, and I guess somebody told him they needed to redo the finish.

      The funny thing is during the second attempt, Natalya started to release the hold again before AJ tapped, and had to quickly reapply the hold when she realized the same thing was about to happen. (not sure why Natalya was in such a hurry)
    This is exactly what happened. The first time, I almost felt like maybe one of them was legit injured so Nattie wanted to release the hold as soon as possible. Then it happened AGAIN and she released the hold early AGAIN and I didnt know what the hell was happening.

Perhaps she kept releasing the hold for fear of breaking AJ's scrawny ass in half?
BigDaddyLoco
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#19 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.82
    Originally posted by Matt Tracker

    The inclusion of HHH in the main event actually deters me from getting the PPV. Only Lesnar/Punk is tempting me to buy it.




Yup, this is where I am at now too.


I don't doubt that Helmsley really thinks he is helping things by getting involved here, but you think he would have learned after killing Punk's momentum by sticking his nose where it didn't need to be that time.

I think he is going to play the HBK role as referee. Call it fair, call it fair, something screwy happens, he may even cause something in error and he will count a reluctant three count.

It is too bad they didn't let Cena and Bryan do the program on their own first, but the McMahons and Helmsley just can't help themselves. This will probably still be a really good match, but I don't feel like I must see it like I would have if they just left Cena and Bryan to their own devices.

DJ FrostyFreeze
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Since: 2.1.02
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#20 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.58
Read it and weep, fella


    Originally posted by kentish
      Originally posted by DJ FrostyFreeze
      This is exactly what happened. The first time, I almost felt like maybe one of them was legit injured so Nattie wanted to release the hold as soon as possible. Then it happened AGAIN and she released the hold early AGAIN and I didnt know what the hell was happening.

    Perhaps she kept releasing the hold for fear of breaking AJ's scrawny ass in half?

You take back what you said about AJ's ass RIGHT NOW.

I'm pretty sure we've seen her bent up worse than that in similar holds before. I actually remember her being one of the more flexible bend-me-backwards Divas. Stacy Keibler was good at that too, IIRC.



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