Hey, I'm feeling much better than last week, so I was in a better mood to watch Raw. I must say that despite the obvious disappointments (no Rock, or Highlight Reel), there was some good stuff. The eye candy was the best! You got Val and Randy in the ring, and the added bonus of HHH doing the commentary!!! Hunter and Randy and Val, oh my! Uh, this Kane stuff is interesting to say the least, so it made for a better show than last week. One annoyance, why didn't we get any buildup at all for HBK and Y2J's match? Unless... Summerslam maybe? I'm cool with that! Not bad at all. Take it away, ladies...
The lack of buildup kind of bothered me, too, but I'm guessing they're going to go HBK/Randy Orton at SummerSlam after the little 'Legend Killer' promo thing, and Orton interference in that match. That just leaves a whole lotta nothing for Jericho though - HBK fights Randy at Summerslam, and it's prolly HHH/Goldberg, right?
I'm sorry, but Kane tombstoning Linda McMahon does not make me hate Kane. The techno entrance music did not suit her either. Of course, in some bizarre stretch of the imagination, it could lead to Shane coming back to avenge his mommy! Woohoo!
Long-winded version of my unintentionally funny moment of the night that still made me laugh throughout today: Sunday night, the Simpsons repeated the episode where Moe feels like he wants to end his life, but he ends up saving Maggie and becomes like a surrogate father to him, and it's all cute, etc. etc. Anyway, there's a couple points in the episode where Moe is in disbelief and just comes off with this "WhaaaaAAAaaaaa?" response. I don't know why, but it just makes me laugh. Rosey's response to Hurricane's suggestion of being a superhero sounded almost *exactly* like that - that "Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat?" Happy little thoughts from the easily amused.
I did enjoy the HBK/Jericho match. I'm just very disappointed in myself that I sat there thinking "Oh my god, this is taking FOREVER." *sigh* I've been trained to have a short attention span. It was really good though, and it made the second hour fly by after what felt like a year's worth of the first hour.
Other than that, RAW just felt... flat? I can't really think of a better word. The anticlimatic end really added to that, but man, the commentary made me wanna just curl up on the futon and call it a night. That is no reflection on HHH's commentary, as I did not hear the commentary since all available sensory nerves were diverted to the eyes during that match. ;)
Hunter & Randy & Val -- oh my! Hunter & Randy & Val -- oh my! :-) (That makes Val the de facto bear then. Mmm -- close enough.) Was that beefy yumminess, or what? And HHH's dulcet tones providing commentary & lending guidance to Randy. Oh yeah! It's always helpful for the impetuous youth to have the counsel & advice of the experienced veterans. And didn't HHH look scrumptious -- I'm thinking that's a little more fitted a black shirt than his usual one, & the pants just drape sooo nicely in the back. Tuck the shades right there, so that the shirt carves just so. (My one objection to the look: Who did you let blow you dry, dear? The wave in the front was just a little too much, & looked like bangs from one angle. Here, let me muss that up just a little for you.)
When Randy first said "I pinned all 3 Dudleys by myself", I was wondering if H was going to take umbrage at that. Apparently not -- he put the same thing over -- what a team player! HHH was sooo good on the mike -- not gold -- platinum. The youth of America needs to know: Stop, Drop & Roll. The Lawler/Coach interaction of the night was HHH inspired. HHH does his JR / Ash Wednesday joke, Coach asks Lawler why he isn't getting on HHH for a non-JR-supportive comment, & Lawler is pretty much left speechless. Priceless.
There was wrestling in there too, wasn't there? Val did good, & did good for Randy. That thing Val did where he had Randy's arm behind his back & between Val's feet, then did the back bump, was pretty slick -- I don't recall ever seeing that. Nice protect of Randy on the slam when Randy didn't jump high enough. "Nah, I knew he had it." Randy only won because of Ric.
My favourite Bischoff may be him kissing up to Linda, being all smarmy, & her being fed up with him. I don't get the Linda hate. She shows up once a quarter (at most), pretty much always delivers something significant, then she goes away again to preserve her credibility. I'm good with that.
I think Gail is trying to ratchet up her game -- she'll get there, but for the meantime, tag team seems like the better plan. Other than Gail's blown spot & bobbled take-off (both of which she did handle properly), the women's match was pretty good. Victoria & Trish are at the chiropracter today, each having caught her (respective) head/neck badly on the ropes. Did I actually hear Jerry Lawler say, "Molly Hottie"?!? I bet she's thrilled.
Should Stevie really stuff his fuzzy hat into the front of his pants when he's not wearing it?
Wouldn't you think that if you were a military guy away from home, you'd prefer to have Ivory play with you rather than Terri prance around for you?
Coach & Lawler. We need some tuning here. A little bit of defenciveness over JR would have been good. Started off being fine. But, as always, Jerry just doesn't know when to stop. The old phrase "Nothing succeeds like excess." does not in fact apply in all situations, Jerry.
OK, we've upped the level on the Bondage Kane look. We've gotten accustomed to the straps & buckles, so now we've added wrist & ankle chains. With padlocks. And an 8-man escort, with a 3-man unlocking ritual. Cool. (This is where "Nothing succeeds like excess" does apply.) You know he has to use some glue to keep the towel from slipping prematurely.
Kane tombstone'd Linda! Linda! Oh, yeah! I'm perfectly happy that he obviously protected her so thoroughly -- her not being at any risk of being legitimately damaged did not diminish the effect for me even one tiny little bit. You know, I thought it was brilliant to have Lawler & Coach away from their mikes for the close of the show. The effect of no commentary at all, just the Arn & Coach exchange, was excellent.
Emma, you would be proud - I taped Raw! VCR + rewind button = goodness. I came in late Monday from my game (there's got to be a more respectable way to get bruises on your knees than playing softball). Anyway, I watched it live from the Michaels/Jericho match and the satellite dish is the babyface champ at my house!!! More on this seemingly insignificant fact later...
I like Linda being around here and there. She does, however, need to trundle (credit:emma) her ass over to SD! and slap her hubby upside the head. But belittling Bischoff works for me, too. Poor Austin, he tries some motivational moves to 'fire' up the wrestlers and it back'fires' in his face. What will he do? I say he should stay co-GM, if anything to harass Bischoff, then just go around yelling What? What? What? at people until it drives them mad and they push him, then he can KICKWHAMSTUN them all he wants. Simple. hehehe
Ah, the women. Okay match. I'm still on the fence with Gail. I'm just waiting for her to wow me at some point. Blowing spots isn't helping the cause (see: Hardy, Jeff). No, I'm kidding, I love Jeff. And everyone makes mistakes (see: spelling, Tomboy). I'm just waiting, it will happen...and Kevin Costnar will make a good movie. BWAHAHAHAHA No, I'm kidding, the women's match was good. I still reserve judgement on Gail, though. That, and I'm waiting for Kevin's new movie...cowboy...something...or other.
Evolution! Yeah! Can't say anything more then what has been said. Trips and Orton, a girl's newest friends. ;-)
Originally posted by StegDutchieI did not hear the commentary since all available sensory nerves were diverted to the eyes during that match. ;)
There was commentary? hehehe Trips was good, a welcomed diversion from the Coach (who I like) and that other fellow. Match was good, pfft, who cares, Orton is beautiful. Venis is no dog either dawg, and that feet thingy he did - very cool! RVD should take notes...hell, RVD better bring a fire extinguisher to his match! Goldberg out! Yeah! Trips...Goldberg...they finally meet! You say what you want Goldberg with your little 'you're next' bit, you haven't played the Game yet, my friend, you best be looking over your shoulder...
Michaels and Jericho. Good lord Michaels, you need to read the fashion report, too. His outfit made me cringe. Get pants that either a) fit or b) just come off. You f-ing tease. I was digging the match, lots of 2 counts, lots of interesting moves, lots of...Flair? What's that all about? Does this set up Orton 'the Legend Killer' v Michaels? I hope not.
Storm has a new look! Hey, thanks for coming Storm. I love the boring angle. He just needs to job more, so he can crack, then go crazy go nuts and let his inner crazy wrestler out - then it will be all good. I wonder why Bischoff never brings up the boring thing with Storm and the damage inflicted on the delicate psyche of the boy. Surely, Austin must be responsible for all of these...well...boring segments from Storm.
Booker, Test...ha! You got nothing on Stacy's ass! Man, that was just not right. Steiner stepped in shit when he fell to Hunter. Although I would much rather find myself being buried under Hunter, Stacy's ass does run a close second - hell - he didn't even have to break a sweat! Booker, retains, does not bode well that he does via Stacy's ass. Don't give the man the belt than pawn him off on some angle that doesn't need it. Although the candy was there, the mouth wasn't appreciating it.
Now whoever thought Rosie could be funny? Shit, I didn't think so. I thought that overweight shit got 'fired'. That was the other Rosie? Shit, my bad. Hurricane continues to prove that his shit doesn't stink! This could be the beginning of some seriously funny shit. I hope Rosie wears a cape. hehehe
Slash Kane (aka Bondage Kane aka the New Kane) is out. I am so digging Slash Kane, he has such charm, charisma, and chains! Yeah! What girl doesn't swoon over a big, brooding, guy with chains?!?!? Yeah! RVD is out and apparently he didn't smoke a litte L prior to the match cuz he was all sorts of bouncy. They are doing their thing, they are moving up the ramp and I can feel it...something big is gonna happen. Something big HAS to happen...well, it does. A big motherfucking thunderstorm decides to come in like the heel wrestler it is and challenges my satellite dish to a match!!! Well, being a heel lover, and karma being a bitch, the satellite dish loses!!! NOOOOOOO!!!! The dish jobs worse than a bad post to CRZ! I lose my feed. MOTHERFUCKER!!! Thank god I had beer in me cuz I could have done worse damage to that fucker on the roof and if it weren't for the football package that little fucker would find itself being my personal thong drying apparatus. DAMN!!!
The feed finally clears as the dish slowly comes to terms with it's own worth and I'm treated to Striparella. *sigh* Yeah, that's what I want to see: a plasticky cartoon version of a plastic person. Geez, I get that enough watching wrestling...Sable anyone? I just made that word up: plasticky. What this one *points to self* needs is more beer!!!
In any case, I have to wait for FOOTAGE! to see the big tombstone. But mad props to Linda for getting it done!
Worth the price of parking: Orton Worth the price of admission: now, I wouldn't know, would I? Cuz the jobber on my roof can't win a fucking match against a little thunderstorm...
Back me up on this one ladies, isn't Stevie Richards the best valet (male or female) out there? He really knows how to complement Victoria the way a valet should, even when he's the one doing the wrestling. I adored him on Monday.