* Opening segment: MONEY. Brock's not going to appear on Raw to defend the Undisputed title, fine, I dispute it. And better yet, they bring back the Big Gold Belt. ^_______^
* Nice promo by Bubba... wonder if anyone told him he's never gonna win that title.
* Wasn't paying attention during the intergender match, but I heard a lot of hymen references. The Reverse Smuckers Principle kicks in here: If Lawler's talking about hymens, it CAN'T be good.
* Nice match by HHH and Flair, by the way. Wonder if HHH actually got goosebumps... has he wrestled Flair before, one on one?
* Good idea for a segment with Jeff and Crash... fits Crash's character perfectly.
* Didn't see the Show/Dreamer match, but any time Show's (hell, anyone's) laid out and Dreamer's screaming his head off, chair in hand, I'm happy.
* I'm not going to dignify the pillow fight by saying much. It was supposed to be a comedy match, right? I don't think ANY of that got a rise out of anyone in the crowd (in any sense). It was just like a train wreck, then a gas truck plows into the wreckage.
* Good little match at the end... RVD holding both belts? Someone get me a screencap.
Well I now have TWO signs to take to RAW next week.
The first one was the usual "CRZ IS WALKING". The second one is now "SHUT UP LAWLER".
Shouldn't be hard to spot me.
If nothing else, maybe we'll get an RVD/HHH match for the title...
Aside from that, I for one was tricked into hoping for a Dudley Boyz reunion on Smackdown when they teased the jump. Then they jump Crash. Isn't that technically a "Heat to Velocity" jump?!?
I did enjoy Flair/HHH. They put on a good show and worked twice. The first match was more believeable than any Flair match I've seen in awhile.
That's about all that interested me (save for seeing Dreamer go nuts with the chair). Woo hoo, the "World" title is back. What's next...The WCW brand? Vince McMahon should run Hardee's. Then at least maybe we'd get Burger Chef back on a "Vince whim"...
Originally posted by drjayphdI'm not going to dignify the pillow fight by saying much. It was supposed to be a comedy match, right? I don't think ANY of that got a rise out of anyone in the crowd (in any sense). It was just like a train wreck, then a gas truck plows into the wreckage.
*
You said a whole lot there.
What I don't get is why they bother building up a storyline, without any continuation during the show. Not only Molly gets embarrased, the team with the storyline loses badly. And it was a good match too. This is like Nitro all over again.
The only good part was Big Show getting ECWed by Dreamer. And maybe RVD winning the hotshot main event.
(edited by deadbeater on 2.9.02 2341) "Business has just picked up" says JR. Then right on cue, Molly enters the arena! Never was JR any better in introducing someone. --Raw 7/15
Originally posted by drjayphd Nice match by HHH and Flair, by the way. Wonder if HHH actually got goosebumps... has he wrestled Flair before, one on one?
I don't believe so. I think I read a summary of HHH on Byte or some other radio program where he specifically said he hadn't and he was looking forward to it.
Unemployment isn't just for philosophy majors anymore. Useful people are also starting to suffer. -Kent Brockman
Did anyone else think it would have been hilarious if Bradshaw would have accidently lit the flag on fire from Kane's pyro right after he saved it from Test? (Well, as much as one could see Old Glory being on fire as hilarious, that is.)
Bad, bad, BAD! Is every week's Raw going to leave a bad taste in my mouth? I mean, ERIC BISCHOFF is on this show! It should be awesomely entertaining! But instead we get...this!
GOOD: -HHH/Flair: Good wrestling match that I wouldn't mind seeing again. And you've got to love Lil' Naitch! He saw the ref bump coming a mile away and bailed! I've NEVER seen that before!
-Good God, the balance of power has shifted!: I was ready to guess that Jeff was going to jump, until Bischoff accused him which automatically meant it wasn't. I don't know about anybody else, but I found it pretty funny when Crash said HE was the one jumping to Smackdown. The first thought that went into my head was "What a...um...shocking swerve?" I just found the whole thing amusing.
BAD: -Undisputed Title (Dec 2001 - Sept 2002): I was getting ready to praise WWE for having someone NEW at the top of the mountain, but now SCREW THEM! Does anybody else think PoocHHHie came up with this gem one night after screwing Stephanie? Way to put yourself over yet again, PoocHHHie! Kevin Nash has taught you well. I mean, I know the idea here is to legitimize the split, but in every fed, there has to be ONE GUY and ONE GUY ONLY on top! This is wishy-washy bullshit that gives me flashbacks of the WCW International Title!
-Intergender Tag Tables match: The match itself wasn't so bad, but when you heard Chris Harvard's promo, you knew...YOU KNEW you'd hear the freakin word HYMEN said A MILLION TIMES!!! Screw you, Lawler! And I want Bubba to rise to the main event more than anybody. I know he can make it there someday. But PLEASE get him away from this comedy shit!
-The longest 3 minutes EVER!: Can we PLEASE get The Island Boyz WRESTLING anytime soon?! This has gone on for almost TWO MONTHS!! Enough is enough! We get the damn point! Although on the upside, that double stroke in mid air was pretty sweet!
-YOUR Tag Champs: 10 points for bringing back Kane better than ever. Minus 1,000,000 points for putting him over both the freakin tag champions cleanly in one match! And to make it that much better, now we have Bradshaw sticking his nose in this feud, possibly setting up Bradshaw/Test. Yippee.
-Pillow Fight match: I've said it before and I'll say it again. We've seen SO MANY of these horrible women's T&A fests ever since Jerry Lawler came back. Is somebody DELIBERATELY catering to him?! Good Lord! What a mess! (In more ways than one)
Just a bad Raw overall. And I hope PoocHHHie is proud of himself. He really IS the smartest man in wrestling, whether we like it or not.
"That's right! You suckas better FIND somewhere to run! 'cause it's me - Booker T - not only am I the Scorpion King, but I'm the five-time WCW Champion - and I got a sword, too! Now can U dig THAT - SUCKAAAAAS"
You know another thought. I wish that Bradshaw accidentally burned the flag. That would for some sick reason majorly mark me out. Imagine what Ross would say: "Bradshaw my HOSS, you turned traitor!! Why Justin why??"
(edited by deadbeater on 2.9.02 2347) "Business has just picked up" says JR. Then right on cue, Molly enters the arena! Never was JR any better in introducing someone. --Raw 7/15
Yay! Separate brands, separate champions! It's time for another Great Thomas RAW Report!
The Return of the World Title: It's official! Welcome to WWE Monday Nitro! Welcome back, Big Gold Belt!
Intergender Table Match: Well, looks like Chris Harvard won't be getting any tonight.
Challenge for CRZ: Hey, CRZ! In the next RAW recap, why don't you tell us how many times Lawler said "hymen" in the show!
Dreamer vs. Big Show: Dreamer almost gets squashed, then clobbers Big Show again and again with a chair, all the while having a crazed look on his face. I think Dreamer's gonna be all right.
The Power of God Will Knock Your Socks Off: Look! HBK is holding a sledgehammer and swearing violent revenge on Trippulaytch AGAIN! Nice Christian shirt, by the way.
World Title Match: Damn, Flair can still wrestle! And say what you will about Trippulaytch, he sold Flair's armbar like a mofo!
Kane vs. Un-Americans: THAT'S the way you make a successful return! Unlike Benoit, who lost his return match with Bubba Ray Dudley, of all people.
3 Minute Match: Ha! Ha! Crash fooled you, Uncle Eric! You flattened Jeff Hardy for nothing! Crash fooled you! Ha! Ha! Ha!
Lingerie Pillow Fight: Damn, Stacy! First you lose a mud match, now you lose a pillow fight with TERRI, of all people! WIN SOMETHING, DAMMIT! And I thought Lawler was a better pervert than this! In the past you made GREAT sexual jokes! Now, the best you can come up with is "I think Terri got clocked!" Jeezum Crow.
The Main Event: OMG TRIPPULAYTCH JOBBED OMG! HE JOBBED! HE FRICKIN' JOBBED! What little hatred I harbored for this man has completely vanished. Back to the markfest. OMG HHH JOBBED!!!!!!1
That's all for this week. Until then, good night, take care of yourselves, and try to find some way to hate Trippulaytch through all this.
Isn't it ironic seeing a guy with a "Saved 1" shirt lying in a pool of his own blood with a head-sized hole in the car next to him?
Originally posted by ICEMANScrew Triple H putting a belt on himself.Let's focus on what really matters........
He put RVD over...even though he probably decimate him in a match for the belt.
This is a clever little thing the Clique does. They find a wrestler who's really hot, put that wrestler over on a Raw or Smackdown, then proceed to have that wrestler return the job on PPV. The result: the hot wrestler gets knocked down a few pedestals and the Clique member gets more heat for himself.
For past precedent, see X-Pac/Tajiri from last year.
"That's right! You suckas better FIND somewhere to run! 'cause it's me - Booker T - not only am I the Scorpion King, but I'm the five-time WCW Champion - and I got a sword, too! Now can U dig THAT - SUCKAAAAAS"
This was not a very good Raw that featured some really painful segments. Lawler was really off tonight between the hymen *jokes* and the pillow fight, ehg! Best moment was probably Buh Buh telling off Triple H and when a small segment like that is your best part of the show you've got problems. I usually give Raw deceant reviews, but this one gets *1/2 stars and THAT may be pushing it a bit.
It was another huge cluster fuck. Why is Booker T fighting Regal when he could be fighting Test? Why is Stevie Richards only featured in a backstage cameo? Why is a 53 year old man fighting twice in one night? Even XPW has enough sense to only trot out Terry Funk once a night.
Somebody in the WWE really needs to take a closer look at the direction of this show.
Originally posted by ICEMANScrew Triple H putting a belt on himself.Let's focus on what really matters........
He put RVD over...even though he probably decimate him in a match for the belt.
This is a clever little thing the Clique does. They find a wrestler who's really hot, put that wrestler over on a Raw or Smackdown, then proceed to have that wrestler return the job on PPV. The result: the hot wrestler gets knocked down a few pedestals and the Clique member gets more heat for himself.
For past precedent, see X-Pac/Tajiri from last year.
That's true,It's False :)
Rebecca: Oh,face it,you just hate everybody.
Enid: That's not true.I just hate all these extroverted,obnoxious,pseudo-bohemian losers.
My only regret about the HHH getting the belt is that what really should have happened was Booker T getting the title shot, and the resultant match. He really desertves it, and besides, don't you think it would have fit for the five time, five time, five time, five time, five time WCW champeen to have the first crack on its return.
Other than Booker and Jericho, I don't know who else really deserves a title on RAW who doesn't have one. (I'm sure I'm probably missing someone, so don't yell at me, ok?)
Lastly, we all know that HHH is fucking Steph, but I don't think that that would allow him to "put a belt on himself". He still isn't the entire creative team, no matter how much you or any one else hates him, and to assume that every time he gets a belt or gets put over is merely a result of boinking a Macmahon is really vain and shallow. As I said above, there are people I'd rather see wearing the belt.
Other thoughts - I missed the end, because I fell asleep listening to Lawler scream about puppies. Yeesh. Why are we even trying to justify this as wrestling?
I saw the Crash turn as soon as he and Jeff Hardy came out and JR said something about "Maybe Jeff will jump ship". I hate it when they blow their cover like that.
Intergender was ok, so was Regal/Booker, though it was way short.
God do I love Tommy Dreamer. I think he should terrorize people with chairs and canes and chains (Oh my) until Bischoff is forced to reinstate the hardcore division. Here's hoping he gets at least a little more respect for his incredible ring insanity.
Originally posted by chazerizerI saw the Crash turn as soon as he and Jeff Hardy came out and JR said something about "Maybe Jeff will jump ship". I hate it when they blow their cover like that
Well *I* didn't see it coming. I knew it wasn't Jeff, but I was trying to figure out who had family on Smackdown...
Kane... no. Jeff... no. Christian... no.
I completely forgot about Crash and Hardcore Holly being cousins. Maybe if Crash had kept his last name it would have helped.
Wait a sec, is Val Venis Edge's brother in law or Christian's? I forgot whose sister he married...
Ike
Karl: If you had a neck and I had hands I would squeeze your brain which is your body right out of the top of your head which does not exist! Zorak: That's some great hair. Karl: Thanks, it's not real.
Damn... I think Val Venis and Edge are the brother-in-laws. I was watching WCW almost exclusively at this point.
Anyway... welcome back, Big Gold Belt! I missed you! Let's hope after the inevitable unification, the Big Gold Belt stays and the... well... formerly WWE Undisputed Title belt goes!
“I can't believe it! I just got pinned by a freaking 12-year-old!”-- Kurt Angle talking about Rey Mysterio on WWE SmackDown!, 8/9/02
Two-Time, Two-Time Randomly Selected Weiner of the Day, 5/27/02 and 7/3/02
When Bischoff mentioned the lingerie pillow fight match, I thought it'd be another three-minute special with the Island Boys squashing Terri and maybe Stacey. More fool me. I can't believe they really went through with it. Coming next week, the black leather, handcuffs, and whips match.
I suppose I should admire them for sticking with the Nowinski-Molly/Bubba-Trish feud, and with the angle of Nowinski's hots for Molly. But does anyone else get the feeling that they have no idea how to end it and are just vamping endlessly to fill time? And I'm amazed Lawler doesn't know what a hymen is ... [standard "Lawler's girlfriends are really young" joke goes here.]
I'm probably alone here, but I'm really looking forward to seeing Crash in the cruiserweight division -- even if it's only on Velocity.
Oh, and yes -- Edge is married to Val's sister, IIRC.
I'll chime in and be the second to greet Crash on SD! in the cruiser ranks. That ought to be really cool. I don't know why, but I'm intrigued to see him and Noble go at it. They seem to have similar styles. It'd be a fun match!
some other thoughts--
-My first reaction to Nowinski's promo about Molly's hymen was "I did not just hear that. TELL ME I did not just HEAR THAT!" Unfortunately, Lawler really killed the humor of it all. I mean, it's hilarious for this Harvardgraduate-with the-geeky-ass hairdo to be fixated on doing the wild thang with Molly. But Lawler saying hymen 1,742,618 times just ruins it.
-Dreamer is just getting more and more over, and I'm glad. If WWE could get Dreamer to his level of face heat he had in ECW from 1995-1997, we're looking at a new IC Champion with a respectable reign down the road, period.
-My twin brother marked out very nearly like a hyperactive twelve year old when RVD pinned HHH! If an outcome like that can make my brother cheer that way, I'd have to think that it's a good barometer of things to come (I HOPE), at least for me. (Usually, he's right about much things WWE, moreso than I am, anyway!)
-(KAYFABE WISE) Man, will those damned Island Boyz EVER get retribution for their deeds? Will Bischoff, for that matter? D-Lo, Stasiak, Moolah, Mae Young, MiniDust, Superfly Snuka, Jeff Hardy (Am I missing anyone?) have gotten their three minutes' worth. I'm just wishing that Bischoff would get his three minutes, too!!! >:(
David Crockett sez it best, folks: "Look at 'im, Tony! Look at 'im!"
Originally posted by RKMtwinMy first reaction to Nowinski's promo about Molly's hymen was "I did not just hear that. TELL ME I did not just HEAR THAT!" Unfortunately, Lawler really killed the humor of it all. I mean, it's hilarious for this Harvardgraduate-with the-geeky-ass hairdo to be fixated on doing the wild thang with Molly. But Lawler saying hymen 1,742,618 times just ruins it.
(
Yeah, Lawler telegraphed that Molly/Nowinski will lose by jumping Molly's hymen so much so to speak, as if it would be the last we will hear of it tonight. Can't they just let a storyline play by itself without a blow-by-blow account or an echo?
"Business has just picked up" says JR. Then right on cue, Molly enters the arena! Never was JR any better in introducing someone. --Raw 7/15