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The W - Random - Bobcat Goldthwaith on Eight Legged Freaks
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Papercuts!
Potato korv








Since: 3.1.02
From: Springfield, Mo.

Since last post: 7909 days
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#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 0.00
"That movie EIGHT LEGGED FREAKS looks so bad I can't believe I'm not in it."

Truer words have not been spoken.



--Jason Baldwin
Writer of Stuff About Comic Books
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odessasteps
Scrapple








Since: 2.1.02
From: MD, USA

Since last post: 3571 days
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#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.41

The funny thing is that it's been getting "moderately good" reviews in a bunch of places, including Stephen Hunter in the post.

"It's okay for what it is." kinda stuff

Since the movie has an actual on-screen reference to THEM, I give it some points for trying.

(edited by odessasteps on 18.7.02 0947)
Papercuts!
Potato korv








Since: 3.1.02
From: Springfield, Mo.

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#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 0.00

    Originally posted by odessasteps
    Since the movie has an actual on-screen reference to THEM, I give it some points for trying.
And it also has the always-stellar (looking) Kari Wuhrer. But that's it.

It's a Dean Devlin/Roland Emmerich flick. I'm not going anywhere near ANYTHING they do -- Independence Day was one of the biggest cinematic atrocities in the history of Hollywood. No, I'll never get over it.



--Jason Baldwin
Writer of Stuff About Comic Books
SmooveK
Goetta








Since: 27.6.02
From: Fukushima, Japan

Since last post: 7198 days
Last activity: 6887 days
#4 Posted on
If you've missed the ads for the Eight Legged Freaks game (and I don't see how), you are missing out on a truly horrendous game experience. And you can download it too!

Basically, you play as David Arquette, who spews out shitty one liners while running around a movie theatre, with ads everywhere. You battle horribly pixelated spiders. It looks like a HORRIBLE Duke3D-era 3D Realms game.

Actually, though, if you liked Ready to Rumble, or David Arquette as world champion, you'd like this game too. Perhaps it's concept art.

-K



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Mr Heel II
Lap cheong








Since: 25.2.02

Since last post: 1891 days
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#5 Posted on
Ebert, who gave it three stars, gets my quote of the week when he said "The chase scene with jumping spiders and dirt bikes adds a much-needed dimension to the boring sport of dirt bike racing."

I don't want to see it because of who made it, and my sheer outrage for "Independence Day" and "Godzilla". But I also love campy B-movies, even modern-day ones like "Mars Attacks" (which was brilliant specifically because "Independence Day" was so BAD) and "Evolution".

Maybe it'll be the second feature at a drive-in somewhere this season.
Jaguar
Knackwurst








Since: 23.1.02
From: In a Blue State finally

Since last post: 1903 days
Last activity: 1903 days
#6 Posted on
Saw this movie on opening day, and being a big fan of B horror movies enjoyed it a lot. Jumping Spiders = Awesome. I nomintate the Jumping Spiders and/or David Arquette as an alternative Smackdown! GM. Some of the spiders even made the same gurgling noise as the flesh eating monster from Sealab 2021! Woo!

-Jag

Just imagine a Giant jumping spider jumping from the top of the ramp all the way to the ring... just to eat Triple H!



"You gotta hate somebody before this is over. Them, me, it doesn't matter."

"Hate, who do I hate? You tell me."

"Who do you love?"

-Wintermute to Case in William Gibson's Neuromancer
Stephanie
Landjager








Since: 2.1.02
From: Madison, WI

Since last post: 614 days
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#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.22

    Originally posted by Jaguar
    Just imagine a Giant jumping spider jumping from the top of the ramp all the way to the ring... just to eat Triple H!


Hey - if it's to eat Triple H, it could jump from anywhere it wanted.

Steph



I'm going twenty-four hours a day...I can't seem to stop
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OlFuzzyBastard
Knackwurst








Since: 28.4.02
From: Pittsburgh, PA

Since last post: 1818 days
Last activity: 995 days
#8 Posted on
I don't understand the advertising of this movie at all. First of all, if your movie stars David Arquette, do everything in your power to hide that fact. Trust me, it isn't a selling point. The only decent movie with Arquette in it that I can think of was the first "Scream", and even then he was the only bad thing about the movie. (Of course, I saw both sequels just waiting for him to die, but it never happened.)

Secondly, every commercial blares "From the producer of Independance Day and Godzilla". Should you really brag about that either?

Okay, I can almost understand "Independance Day". It was really sucessful, and I think dumb guys still really like it. You can probably get people into the theater with that one, I'm sorry to say.

But "Godzilla"?! Did anyone like the remake of Godzilla? Did anyone go see the remake of Godzilla?! Why the fuck would you want to associate your new movie with the remake of Godzilla? You don't see George Lucas advertising himself as "the director of Howard the Duck and the man who brought you Jar Jar Binks" do you?

Jeebus...



"The only difference between lilies and turds are those humankind have agreed upon, and I don't always agree."
---George Carlin

"Those who dance are considered insane by those who can't hear the music."
---Anon.
ManiacalClown
Landjager








Since: 2.1.02
From: Houston, TX

Since last post: 3989 days
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#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 0.00
I remember some somewhat hot chick in Godzilla, but that's about it.



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Nate The Snake
Liverwurst








Since: 9.1.02
From: Wichita, Ks

Since last post: 7192 days
Last activity: 6662 days
#10 Posted on
I won't say I loved Godzilla, but I certainly didn't hate it. I liked the idea of my personal favorite giant mutant hellbeast done up with crazy effects and whatnot, and while I wasn't terribly happy with their decision to crossbreed an iguana with a velociraptor for the star, I did sort of like the basic idea: that their Godzilla wasn't a big, lumbering invincible target with a bad case of thunderthighs. That part, at least, was... well, not an improvement but an interesting change.

The main problem I had with it was the ending. If they'd ended the movie about a half-hour earlier, after the sub "killed" the monster, that'd have been perfectly satisfactory... a nice throwback to the old "we're almost totally sure we killed the monster! Hoo-ray?" type of ending. But NOOO... they had to kill the momma and turn it into "Jurassic Park, New York Style".

OTOH, I don't think I could bring myself to go see 8LF... unless I was assured that David Arquette spent a great deal of the movie being bitten by spiders and drained until he turned into a really, really untalented husk. I'm a big MST-quality movie fan... but that doesn't necessarily mean I want to pay first-run price for it. Heh.



Kansas-born and deeply ashamed
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WyldeWolf1
Boerewors








Since: 20.6.02
From: Florida

Since last post: 7875 days
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#11 Posted on

    Originally posted by OlFuzzyBastard
    You don't see George Lucas advertising himself as "the director of Howard the Duck and the man who brought you Jar Jar Binks" do you?

    Jeebus...



Tell me you didn't say that....Howard the Duck is classic 80s cheese, man! Reminds me of elementary school....

Jar-Jar...[shudder]



WyldeWolf1
The Man of 1,007 holds, making him 3 holds better than Chris Jericho!
FLRockAndLaw
Kishke








Since: 2.1.02
From: Central Florida, somewhere between Orlando and Tampa, U.S.A.

Since last post: 2979 days
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#12 Posted on
Okay - just a brief tangent here, but I'm curious about something, and perhaps you can help explain your opinions to me, so I can better understand them.

Why the complete lack of love for "Independence Day"? IMHO, the movie was trying to make the story seem grand... like an epic... like "Raiders of the Lost Ark," "Star Wars," or (more recently) "Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring." While telling a story of tragedy that ultimately turns to triumph, they still managed to find spots for humor that weren't inappropriate. A decent cast of actors in various roles. Maybe not the greatest film of all time, but I have a hard time calling it such a debacle when crap like "Bringing Out The Dead," "Hot To Trot," and "Lawnmower Man" exists.

Someone help me out, please. I'm apparently a dumb fan of cinematic atrocities, and I'd really like to know why.



RageRockrr - Randomly Selected Wiener of the Day Conspiracy Victim
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OlFuzzyBastard
Knackwurst








Since: 28.4.02
From: Pittsburgh, PA

Since last post: 1818 days
Last activity: 995 days
#13 Posted on
"Independance Day" was fine if you didn't think while you were watching it.

I mean, Will Smith lands randomly in the vast wreckage of Los Angeles, and just happens to be twenty feet from his fiancee, her kid, their dog and the First Lady? And this is moments after my least favorite movie moment ever - outrunning the fireball. (And they hide in a closet, because the fire won't think to find them in there, I guess, and it WORKED?!)

It still fascinates me that the aliens were Mac compatible, too...

Hell, the Undertaker/Kane storyline has less plot holes and gaps of logic than "Independance Day"...



"The only difference between lilies and turds are those humankind have agreed upon, and I don't always agree."
---George Carlin

"Those who dance are considered insane by those who can't hear the music."
---Anon.
Mr Heel II
Lap cheong








Since: 25.2.02

Since last post: 1891 days
Last activity: 1627 days
#14 Posted on

    Originally posted by RageRockrr
    Okay - just a brief tangent here, but I'm curious about something, and perhaps you can help explain your opinions to me, so I can better understand them. Why the complete lack of love for "Independence Day"? IMHO, the movie was trying to make the story seem grand... like an epic... like "Raiders of the Lost Ark," "Star Wars," or (more recently) "Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring."
You just answered your own question. They tried to make the story seem grand. They tried to make that crappy, poorly-written, overproduced, horrendous piece of garbage...grand. Every member of the cast with the possible exception of Will Smith (who really did turn out a good performance) overacted the SHIT out of every emotional scene. And that just made it worse than it already was.

Siskel and Ebert said the makers, "should never be allowed to make a movie again." If you didn't believe them then, surely you did when you saw "Godzilla".
ges7184
Lap cheong








Since: 7.1.02
From: Birmingham, AL

Since last post: 2178 days
Last activity: 2166 days
#15 Posted on
Independence Day wasn't that bad for what it was, a piece of popcorn fluff with lots of special effects. There was a lot of action at any rate. It's just insulting when this movie is compared to movies such as Star Wars. Independence Day is not even in the same league as Star Wars. I think a video review book I have gave it five stars. It's not a five-star movie! The story and dialogue is just too lame to be considered a classic.

It's not even close to the worse movie I've ever seen. But it did make more money that a movie of that quality deserved.
J. Kyle
Banger








Since: 21.2.02
From: The Land of Aloha

Since last post: 1560 days
Last activity: 1341 days
#16 Posted on
http://jkyle.com says:

I saw Eight Legged Freaks, and reviewed it quite favorably. It was what I thought it would be, F-U-N.



MMPS Member----VISIT SMARKTOWN!----Enter the Geekdom
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Papercuts!
Potato korv








Since: 3.1.02
From: Springfield, Mo.

Since last post: 7909 days
Last activity: 7819 days
#17 Posted on | Instant Rating: 0.00

    Originally posted by RageRockrr
    Why the complete lack of love for "Independence Day"? IMHO, the movie was trying to make the story seem grand... like an epic... like "Raiders of the Lost Ark," "Star Wars," or (more recently) "Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring."
RageRockrr, I know you and I frequently disagree, but please keep in mind that I have nothing but the utmost respect for you.

At any rate, Independence Day flat out insults its audience numerous times by not only TRYING to be "Science Fiction" while disregarding science, but also making far too many leaps in logic and common sense to really be believable in any capacity.

to wit:

Any Winnebago can gain access to Area 51 (described in the film as the most secretive installation in America) by simply flashing a dead alien at the gate.

Macintosh computers are not compatible with anything on earth, yet they readily interface with an alien ship

The Aliens are telekinetic and use their powerful force of mind to do everything, yet their ships are controlled with a joystick-style device.

A drunken crop-duster pilot can learn to fly an F-15 in 30 minutes

An F-15 fighter pilot can learn to fly alien technology in 30 minutes

The alien species is so advanced they have a thick and hard bone shell protecting their "real" head (and brains) and yet Will Smith knocks one out with one punch.

The aliens are so advanced (and psychic) they know to antagonize a room full of military officers carrying guns

Giant ships larger than an entire city can enter the earth's atmosphere without causing any dramatic climate changes. Said ships can also pass between the moon and earth without disrupting either planet's orbit.

Alien technology hasn't advanced in 50 years and an alien ship that has been crashed for 50 years can easily "mingle" with current models without anyone taking notice.

There are many many other "forehead slappers" like this in the movie. I've seen it a total of one time and that was six years ago. I'll try to dig up the column I wrote about it back then and see if I can point out any more.

The fact that it DID make so much money is what really sticks in a lot of people's craw.



--Jason Baldwin
Contributing Writer
Kevin Smith's Movie Poop Shoot dot com
This week: Devil's Due Publishing's Josh Blaylock and Scott Wherle on G.I. JOE, MICRONAUTS and the way they're viewed in the comics industry
Coming Wednesday at Moviepoopshoot.com
A-MOL
Frankfurter








Since: 26.6.02
From: York, England

Since last post: 7317 days
Last activity: 7259 days
#18 Posted on
Similar thing with the Must-Never-Be-Insulted LOTR - Why don't they throw the ring down that big ol' crack Gandalf fell into? End of film.
Papercuts!
Potato korv








Since: 3.1.02
From: Springfield, Mo.

Since last post: 7909 days
Last activity: 7819 days
#19 Posted on | Instant Rating: 0.00

    Originally posted by A-MOL
    Similar thing with the Must-Never-Be-Insulted LOTR - Why don't they throw the ring down that big ol' crack Gandalf fell into? End of film.
Someone didn't pay attention to the movie. The ONLY way the ring can be destroyed is to throw it back into the fires of the mountian where it was created. Otherwise it will ALWAYS be found.

And your "big ol' crack Gandalf fell into" example is way wrong -- but discounting it would require me to reveal a huge spoiler for many who don't know what happens next.



--Jason Baldwin
Contributing Writer
Kevin Smith's Movie Poop Shoot dot com
This week: Devil's Due Publishing's Josh Blaylock and Scott Wherle on G.I. JOE, MICRONAUTS and the way they're viewed in the comics industry
Coming Wednesday at Moviepoopshoot.com
CxMorgado
Boudin rouge








Since: 21.1.02
From: Boston MA is the rippen'ist town...

Since last post: 2984 days
Last activity: 2887 days
#20 Posted on

    Originally posted by Papercuts!

      Originally posted by RageRockrr
      Why the complete lack of love for "Independence Day"? IMHO, the movie was trying to make the story seem grand... like an epic... like "Raiders of the Lost Ark," "Star Wars," or (more recently) "Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring."
    RageRockrr, I know you and I frequently disagree, but please keep in mind that I have nothing but the utmost respect for you.

    At any rate, Independence Day flat out insults its audience numerous times by not only TRYING to be "Science Fiction" while disregarding science, but also making far too many leaps in logic and common sense to really be believable in any capacity.



You are aware that most science fiction movies disregard actual science most of the time right? Hence the fiction part of the equation...



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