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The W - Pro Wrestling - iMPACT! 4-26-10 "Mr. Monday Night"
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Karlos the Jackal
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Since: 2.1.02
From: The City of Subdued Excitement

Since last post: 3011 days
Last activity: 1966 days
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.00
Hulk Hogan is here to put over, and then introduce, Rob Van Dam. RVD comes out and talks about how he's going to be the Greatest World Champion Ever.

This unmitigated gall brings out AJ Styles (and Ric Flair). Greatest World Champion EVER? "Are you high RIGHT NOW?" asks Styles. Last week, AJ slipped on the top rope, you see, and that's the only reason why RVD won -- why, RVD probably lubed those ropes in the first place!

Madison Rayne vs. Angelina Love vs. Tara: Lacey Von Erich and Velvet Sky get sent to the back. Madison Rayne is a really weird choice for KO champ, isn't she? She's the best wrestler out of the BPs by a fair shot, granted, but personality-wise she's always been shown to be a follower no matter who the leader is. She's like the Lacey Chabert of the Beautiful People.

Anyway, she pulls out a win -- after spending most of the match running away -- by shoving Love into Tara; Tara falls out of the ring and Rayne rolls Love up for the three. After Tara and Love's collision, Love starts holding her arm to her side, so this may be where she injured it.

After the match Love and Tara brawl. Tara begs forgiveness, and then when Love turns her back in disgust, Tara attacks her again!

Shannon Moore vs. Kazarian: This is for the title, although the physical belt is still with Douglas Williams in Europe. Match is adequate. There's our first ref bump (out of three!) of the night. While the ref is out, Moore goes up top, and Matt Morgan runs out and shoves Moore off -- all the way to the floor! (Morgan is upset that Moore turned down his offer to tag last week.)

Morgan shoves Moore back into the ring, and Kaz -- oblivious to the preceding events -- hits Moore with the back-to-belly piledriver for the pin.

SAMOA JOE IS HERE. I forgot to say last week that Joe is back in his old, bi-colored trunks now -- another sign that we're witnessing a return to roots here. Joe also looks much trimmer to me than the last time we saw him -- what do you think? Anyway, Joe destroys Kaz -- superkick, more kicks and a Musclebuster -- and he leaves again.

Matt Morgan asks Jesse Neal to be his partner -- since tonight's match is against Team 3D, this presents Neal with a quandary. Morgan tells Neal that his Dead Best Friend would have wanted him to do this.

AJ Styles & Sting vs. Jeff Jarrett & Jeff Hardy: This is Falls Count Anywhere, but also tags count, which is mildly confusing because they have two refs to count pinfalls but I don't know why if only two people are legal at any given time.

This mostly breaks down into JJ/Sting and AJ/Hardy. In fact, partway through, Sting simply loses interest and wanders off into the back; Jarrett, acting on a hot tip from the crowd, follows him. They head up the stairs towards the rafters and fight; Sting has his bat and beats JJ down with it.

In the Zone, Hardy lays AJ out on a table and then climbs up a ladder on the stage; before he can jump off, however, Sting pins JJ in the back and the ref calls for the bell. Hardy seems let down by this.

Since we're already getting Sting vs. Jarrett at Sacrifice, I assume we'll also get Hardy vs. Styles as well.

Jesse Neal goes to Devon and Ray to ask for their blessing and they give it to him, with a warning not to trust Morgan.

THE POPE IS OUT and he's got a BLINGED OUT EYEPATCH over the eye that AJ punctured with a pen at Lockdown, and one arm is in a sling as well. D'Angelo Dinero cuts a promo about how he gets back up when he gets knocked down. The crowd is PUTTY, I tell you.

Mr. Anderson comes out and mocks Dinero -- "Did you get a boo-boo?" -- and the crowd, accusing them of drinking Pope's Kool-Aid -- he points at specific people in the audience: "Sucker. Rube." He challenges Dinero to a match at Sacrifice -- "Do I get an AMEN? Or do I get a...bu-kaw?" (Chicken sound.) "Bu bu bu bu-kaw?" Man, the one thing that Anderson excels at is being a total asshole.

Dinero points out that his PIMP HAND is still working -- BACKHAND TO ANDERSON -- Anderson goes on the attack, pulling off Dinero's eyepatch and JAMMING his thumb into Dinero's eye! The Tough Security guys are out and Anderson bails. I enjoyed this segment.

Team 3D vs. Matt Morgan & Jesse Neal: Team 3D is shown in back -- they've put Sean Waltman through a table, and Waltman's head is IN A PUDDLE OF BLOOD! Then they come out for their match, which is predictably short-lived because Kevin Nash and Scott Hall interrupt. Neal goes to help 3D and Morgan punks Neal out and chokeslams him.

After commercial, Neal and 3D are in the ring. Neal calls out Morgan, but Morgan, in back, says "who?" -- he doesn't even remember Jesse's name, and besides, he's off the clock. Hulk Hogan appears and tells Morgan he's better answer Neal's call.

Morgan comes out and 3D leaves Neal to fight his own battle. Neal goes after Matt with a title belt -- Morgan begs off, then low-blows Neal. Beltshot to Neal! Shannon Moore comes out -- for revenge from earlier tonight, remember -- and Morgan takes off. Moore helps Neal up and they compare haircuts and shake hands -- YES YES YES ARE YOU A MOHICAN OR A MOHICAN'T. One dollar says here's your next Tag Team champs.

Eric Bischoff announces the new ranking system -- so far, it's just a fan vote to determine RVD's opponent at Sacrifice. That doesn't really seem like "ranking." Vote online here. That page also suggests that:

    That’s right, your vote, along with that of the TNA Championship Committee, will go a long way in determining the monthly Top 10 Contender rankings and ultimately who gets a shot at the coveted TNA World Championship Belt.

    Individual rankings are determined by a combination of weighted factors. These factors include individual wrestler career performance, won/loss record and online fan voting. So join in and help shape what you see on TNA and vote for your Top Contender often.
(I voted for AJ Styles, although weirdly, Desmond Wolfe is in the lead as I type this.)

Orlando Jordan is backstage, wearing what appears to be a loincloth made from various Muppet birds. He announces his new talk segment (OH JOY), the "O Zone", which debuts next week. His first guest will be Rob Terry, in whom Jordan seems to take an...interest.

Nash and Hall are backstage, upset about Waltman. Nash says he'll be bringing "SOMEONE" in. Chyna? Beefcake? Oh the tenterhooks!

Ric Flair vs. Abyss: This is a "Ring vs. Ring" match -- winner gets the other guy's Hall of Fame ring. Ric Flair cut a taped promo before this where he stated, quite convincingly, that Abyss doesn't deserve to wear the ring -- he didn't earn it, and he can do anything he likes for the rest of his life, and he'll NEVER earn it.

To be honest, I skimmed through this match -- I have no interest in watching Flair wrestle. Not because he's "ruining his retirement" or anything -- like Flair says, there are no rules for retirement -- but just because the guy's 60 years old and looks like a bowl of cold cuts.

Anyway. The unsurprisingly crimson-masked Flair wins with a brass-knuckle punch to the balls(!) but -- DUSTY FINISH! The previously-bumped Earl Hebner spots the knucks and restarts the match and Abyss Hulks Up and takes the win with the Black Hole Slam.

Hogan comes out and yanks the ring of Flair's finger and announces that he knows JUST WHO he's going to award it to NEXT WEEK. Oh, please be Jay Lethal!

--K

(edited by Karlos the Jackal on 27.4.10 0235)

(edited by Karlos the Jackal on 27.4.10 0238)

Last 5 movies seen: The 7th Victim ***1/2 - Crazy Heart ***1/2 - 44 Inch Chest **1/2 - The Lovely Bones **1/2 - The Young Victoria ***
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lotjx
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Since: 5.9.08

Since last post: 1681 days
Last activity: 1520 days
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.50
Not as good as last week, but still solid. They are building towards Sacrifice. I do like the scroll thing since its going to help with storyline plots that can't be gotten in during the show like Love's injury. Not loving the Ring vs. Ring storyline. I voted as well and Desomond is still number 1, but only by 3% ahead of Jeff. I assume this is as legitimate as the NXT voting.
CruelAngel777
Sujuk








Since: 7.4.02

Since last post: 2791 days
Last activity: 2774 days
#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.95
The Mohicans unite! I may have to start watching again, cause now I have a sudden vested interest in two people I really couldn't give a shit about all due to matching haircuts.
dMr
Andouille








Since: 2.11.02
From: Edinburgh, Scotland

Since last post: 2852 days
Last activity: 1198 days
#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.41
    Originally posted by Karlos
    Joe also looks much trimmer to me than the last time we saw him -- what do you think?

Aye, I thought he looked far better last week. Maybe he was just wearing some particularly unflattering pants in his Nation of Violence days, but if those ninja kidnappers put him on an intensive diet while they had him I can't hate them for it.

Last week was a huge improvement on recent programming, and this week sounds like it was a lot saner as well, so I'll give it a whirl again on Saturday.

    Originally posted by lotjx
    I assume this is as legitimate as the NXT voting.
Is there actually anything to back up the cynicism I keep hearing that such voting is rigged beyond, well, good ole cynicism? You can land yourself in a fair amount of bother* for lying about the results of votes (even free ones), besides which, it's pretty easy to convince people in online polls to vote the way you want them to. Especially when you've got a couple hours of TV programming each week to help you in that regard.

*At least in the UK, so I assume there would be similar regulations in the US.
graves9
Sujuk








Since: 19.2.10
From: Brooklyn NY

Since last post: 1689 days
Last activity: 1449 days
#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.87
Opening segment was pretty good with strong mic work by Styles. I'm not sure why RVD disapeared the rest of the night. The Anderson-Pope segment was the highlight of the night as Anderson is a great asshole heel and The Pope is gold on the mic. It would seem like they had written Waltman out last night. If Heyman comes in the third guy will be Justin Credible I'd bet. No Beer Money or The MCMG but we gotta continue that Team 3D-Band feud! Morgan should not be flopping around like a fish for Moore or Neal. Pretty sure Morgan will drop the tag titles to a reuniting L A X down the line. Flair-Abyss was as awful as expected. I wish Flair would wear a shirt like he did back in his late WCW days. So they've advertised someone getting Flair's ring next week and talk show segment with Jordan. Weak.
Hokienautic
Lap cheong








Since: 2.1.02
From: Blacksburg VA

Since last post: 1467 days
Last activity: 1452 days
#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.73
    Originally posted by Karlos the Jackal
    Ric Flair vs. Abyss: This is a "Ring vs. Ring" match -- winner gets the other guy's Hall of Fame ring. Ric Flair cut a taped promo before this where he stated, quite convincingly, that Abyss doesn't deserve to wear the ring -- he didn't earn it, and he can do anything he likes for the rest of his life, and he'll NEVER earn it.

    To be honest, I skimmed through this match -- I have no interest in watching Flair wrestle. Not because he's "ruining his retirement" or anything -- like Flair says, there are no rules for retirement -- but just because the guy's 60 years old and looks like a bowl of cold cuts.

    Anyway. The unsurprisingly crimson-masked Flair wins with a brass-knuckle punch to the balls(!) but -- DUSTY FINISH! The previously-bumped Earl Hebner spots the knucks and restarts the match and Abyss Hulks Up and takes the win with the Black Hole Slam.

    Hogan comes out and yanks the ring off Flair's finger and announces that he knows JUST WHO he's going to award it to NEXT WEEK. Oh, please be Jay Lethal!

    --K



Cue heel turn for Abyss? "You didn't win that ring, Hogan! I did! It's mine!" Or will they draw out the inevitable longer?
Psycho Penguin
Liverwurst








Since: 24.6.07
From: Greenacres FL

Since last post: 4918 days
Last activity: 4914 days
#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.25
It's obviously apparent the voting is rigged because it accomplishes so much difference from just naming a #1 contender and fans won't get mad at all if they find out its rigged! Genius conspiracy theory!

I'm surprised Abyss hasn't turned yet, I figured he would a few weeks ago, so that probably is coming soon.

Good show again. Even if they gave away Abyss vs Flair on free TV!!



http://www.gamefaqs.com/features/recognition/9471.html


http://www.runningondew.com


"I think that in five years, Orton is far more likely to be in Billy Gunn Land than being a major player in WWE." - Big Bad - 11/22/03
kentish
Andouille








Since: 19.8.05
From: My Old Kentucky Home

Since last post: 3414 days
Last activity: 1425 days
#8 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.80
    Originally posted by Psycho Penguin
    It's obviously apparent the voting is rigged because it accomplishes so much difference from just naming a #1 contender and fans won't get mad at all if they find out its rigged! Genius conspiracy theory!

    I'm surprised Abyss hasn't turned yet, I figured he would a few weeks ago, so that probably is coming soon.

    Good show again. Even if they gave away Abyss vs Flair on free TV!!

It seems like the Abyss turn is so obvious, maybe even TNA realizes is and will hold off on it, or maybe even not turn him. Let's hope they hold off as long as possible, because the sooner he turns, the sooner we get Hulk back in action.




"I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ."

-- Mahatma Gandhi
Karlos the Jackal
Lap cheong








Since: 2.1.02
From: The City of Subdued Excitement

Since last post: 3011 days
Last activity: 1966 days
#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.00
Those of you suffering from a lack of MCMG may enjoy this new public service announcement from Alex Shelley ("Tag Team Specialist and Children's Role Model").

Click Here (youtube.com)

--K



Last 5 movies seen: Adventureland **1/2 - The 7th Victim ***1/2 - Crazy Heart ***1/2 - 44 Inch Chest **1/2 - The Lovely Bones **1/2
BigDaddyLoco
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Since: 2.1.02

Since last post: 327 days
Last activity: 327 days
#10 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.56
If you replaced Sting with the WCW/nWo fake Sting would anyone notice or even care at this point?

Okay, what is with the stupid book that Shannon Moore devotes his life to?

Kazarian is bald, he needs to come to terms with this. I hate his look.

I voted for The Pope, but only 8% of the people are with me on that one.

Cerebus
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Since: 17.11.02

Since last post: 2460 days
Last activity: 2182 days
#11 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.48
Why would Abyss turn on Hogan?

The only reason I can think of right now is because "Russo's writing it." There doesn't have to always be a turn or a swerve.



Forget it Josh... it's Cerebustown.
Psycho Penguin
Liverwurst








Since: 24.6.07
From: Greenacres FL

Since last post: 4918 days
Last activity: 4914 days
#12 Posted on | Instant Rating: 1.04
    Originally posted by Cerebus
    Why would Abyss turn on Hogan?

    The only reason I can think of right now is because "Russo's writing it." There doesn't have to always be a turn or a swerve.


Because he's sick of Hogan hogging the spotlight. He is coming out to Hogan's WCW music for fucks sake. And he's a monster. It write itself.



http://www.gamefaqs.com/features/recognition/9471.html


http://www.runningondew.com


"I think that in five years, Orton is far more likely to be in Billy Gunn Land than being a major player in WWE." - Big Bad - 11/22/03
kentish
Andouille








Since: 19.8.05
From: My Old Kentucky Home

Since last post: 3414 days
Last activity: 1425 days
#13 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.80
    Originally posted by Psycho Penguin
      Originally posted by Cerebus
      Why would Abyss turn on Hogan?

      The only reason I can think of right now is because "Russo's writing it." There doesn't have to always be a turn or a swerve.


    Because he's sick of Hogan hogging the spotlight.

Also known as the reason anyone has ever turned on Hogan.

But Cerebus, I agree, I hope he doesn't turn. I have been a fan of him for years, and am glad he is getting a prominent role. If they turn him, he eats a legdrop, and that's it for him.




"I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ."

-- Mahatma Gandhi
KJames199
Scrapple
Moderator








Since: 10.12.01
From: #yqr

Since last post: 226 days
Last activity: 7 days
#14 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.09
Ratings:

Raw: 3.1
Impact: 0.5

I don't want to overstate things - I know this was a Very Special Episode of Raw - but ouch.



JK: FB, T
graves9
Sujuk








Since: 19.2.10
From: Brooklyn NY

Since last post: 1689 days
Last activity: 1449 days
#15 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.87
    Originally posted by KJames199
    Ratings:

    Raw: 3.1
    Impact: 0.5

    I don't want to overstate things - I know this was a Very Special Episode of Raw - but ouch.
Yowza. Raw drew the same rating as last week but they obviously cut into Impacts ratings with the 8 pm start.
hansen9j
Andouille








Since: 7.11.02
From: Riderville, SK

Since last post: 115 days
Last activity: 115 days
#16 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.90
    Originally posted by graves9
      Originally posted by KJames199
      Ratings:

      Raw: 3.1
      Impact: 0.5

      I don't want to overstate things - I know this was a Very Special Episode of Raw - but ouch.
    Yowza. Raw drew the same rating as last week but they obviously cut into Impacts ratings with the 8 pm start.
The three hour Raw's also always have lower average ratings (because plenty of fans don't remember to turn in an hour earlier), so having the same ratings as last week is an improvement. On the flip side, the people that watch Impact are a little more internet savvier, and are more likely to be aware that Raw is a 3 hour show, hence there still being a TNA evisceration.



It is the policy of the documentary crew to remain true observers and not interfere with its subjects.
"This topic is going to suck to read in three years." -Psycho Penguin
"Well. Shit." -hansen9j
CEOIII
Bockwurst








Since: 25.7.02
From: Franklin, PA

Since last post: 2600 days
Last activity: 1936 days
#17 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.28
    Originally posted by BigDaddyLoco
    Okay, what is with the stupid book that Shannon Moore devotes his life to?


The Book of DILLIGAF.

Do
I
Look
Like
I
Give
A
Fuck

Take a good look at Shannon. Does he?



I'm Charlie Owens, good night, and good luck.
geemoney
Scrapple








Since: 26.1.03
From: Naples, FL

Since last post: 12 days
Last activity: 11 hours
#18 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.18
I had to laugh at the tag match needing two referees, yet the ref thought Jeff Hardy was an illegal man in the match after getting a tag TWICE. Didn't the other ref see it? Isn't that what he's for?
R-Dub
Pickled pork








Since: 25.8.05
From: Michigan

Since last post: 1454 days
Last activity: 736 days
#19 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.00
CEOIII, Thanks. For some odd reason, I always heard that as "Gilligaf".

Samoa Joe's weight loss = deck chairs off the titanic. He may have slimmed down though since I wasn't watching too closely during the whole Nation of Violence thing. I am just glad he is back to more of the silent assassin type. His actions speak louder than his words ever can.

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