Originally posted by DrDirtVmastic, even when she was younger we stopped the situation stat. Naturally the discipline was different when younger but we did several things.
1. We didn't put her in unreasonable situations, i.e. where at her age it was dumb to expect her to behave as the situation called for.
2. In the store or Wendy's or whatever, we didn't let the situation continue and escalate, she was removed form the situation.
3. One of us stayed home while the other did "X" when we knew she didn't go or we simply passed on the invite or whatever.
Often when parents are embarassed, it was because they knew they shouldn't have put the kid in the situation.
It baffles me that you need training and a license to cut hair or do manicures but we provide no training to parent.
I was embarassed when I couldn't get my three month old to stop crying because it's making a loud noise and annoying people. Did you have some magic I didn't to control babies? Should I have not put him in the situation of being a three month old(or heck even a one or two year old can lose it for zero reason and it can't be predicted)? We're talking about going to the store here. When my wife would travel for work was I not supposed to go shopping because we had a child that may or may not get upset?
Yes, we left the store if we couldn't get him calmed down but stop acting like you had total control at all times with your kid. We all had times when they lost it and yes we left the store, but it can't always be avoided or predicted.
Looking down on other parents without having any clue of their situation at that time isn't right. That's what is annoying me here.
Wmastic, I am not trying to look down on anyone and there are times when you have to struggle through as you suggest.
And there is a big, big difference between a three month old crying and "misbehaving". Babies cry and only an idiot would consider that "misbehaving."
And I didn't say I had total control of our child. I said we dealt with the situation. I have made plenty of parenting mistakes. I am not saying toddler behavior is predictable.
Finally, I apoligize if you feel I was picking on you or anyone else.
I'm sorry too if I got a little agressive there. I know most of us are doing our best, and it's easy to get defensive regarding your kids. I do agree that by a certain age, the parents should be held responsible if it gets crazy and they do nothing.
I read something awhile back from a Mom who had been dealing with a fussy child at a restaurant. She was not letting the child get the upper hand, but the child was still noisy and possibly disturbing people. A woman walked up to the mother on her way out, and said, "I want you to know that you're doing an amazing job as a parent." It completely made the mother's day and was the opposite of what she thought the woman was going to do or say.
I think as a culture we too often focus on the negative. Something as simple as a compliment when you know someone is dealing with a difficult situation is worth so much.
Rather than resurrect my earlier posts on this topic and having this go a direction I didn't want it to... I'm going to say this.
Some people are poor. Some people are ugly. No one chooses these things, or at least no one who isn't an artist looking to make a name for themselves.
It is sad that people are already marginalized by society for being poor or ugly. These people don't shop at two in the morning because they want to. These are people who end up working dead end, graveyard jobs because society puts them there. We are already cruel to these people, as a group, without piling it on by putting them up for mockery.
The other day when I got home, there were people in my yard. They were picking fruit illegally from the bushes on the edge of my property. I wanted to pick these blackberries myself, but I let them stay there because they needed the food.
I see and deal with poor people every day. I try really hard to treat everyone the same - I know more about the janitors who work in our buildings than I do about the executives, and I'm on a first name basis with our CEO (Ok, most of us are - but you get the idea.)
Sites like this really piss me off and make me wonder if the internet is actually a good thing. There are many times I've left fark.com feeling worse about humanity - and I stay away from 4chan and sites like that which I know are even worse.
I think people need to be thankful for how foruntate they are to have been born where they were, how they were, in the time they were born. This is the best time to have been alive in history, and being born in America with the opportunities we all have with public schools, public health care, and the infrastructure (roads, highways, hospitals) that we all have access to. Instead of focusing the spotlight of ridicule on those who we feel are beneath us, I wish we could all realize how great we all have it, and try to make the world even better.
Colonial America was probably a pretty shitty place compared to today, and the founding fathers did amazing work in setting up our country. With all of the advances we have at our disposal today, is this site the best of what we can do? Does it even deserve a second look?
I don't want to call out anyone or have anyone leave here upset at me - I'm not calling you on what you said. I'm just telling you how this site hit me in the gut, and why I don't like it. I don't want to argue it - because honestly if anyone starts defending the site or its content, I don't know how positively I will react to that.
Anyway. There. I'm done with this thread again and I'm not going to sulk.
I honestly hadn't even been the site, but based on your description I think I get what's going on there. Some people, sadly, need to find people they can make fun of so that they can feel better about themselves. It's really no different than schoolyard bullies, except that the people are older (I was going to say "more grown up", but they really aren't, are they?)
You have completely taken that site out of context.
It is not mocking the poor or those who work odd hours. It's mocking bizarre fashion sense, if anything.
Quoting the "About Us" page..."We are trying to have some fun here and there is a difference between someone who is mentally challenged and a person who has a fu Manchu and is still rocking MC Hammer pants."
Originally posted by Mr Heel IIYou have completely taken that site out of context.
It is not mocking the poor or those who work odd hours. It's mocking bizarre fashion sense, if anything.
Quoting the "About Us" page..."We are trying to have some fun here and there is a difference between someone who is mentally challenged and a person who has a fu Manchu and is still rocking MC Hammer pants."
I kinda have to agree. I mean you can be poor AND ugly and still be able to properly dress yourself and get a hair cut. These are people making CHOICES to look like this.
I see this as a site similar to Engrish and Hanzi Smatter. Like others have said, it's publicizing the poor choices people didn't have to make, but did anyway.
Also, it's not all pics of people's lack of dress sense. There are a few "redneck-mobiles" and such that are good for a "WTF?"
Originally posted by Mr Heel IIYou have completely taken that site out of context.
It is not mocking the poor or those who work odd hours. It's mocking bizarre fashion sense, if anything.
Quoting the "About Us" page..."We are trying to have some fun here and there is a difference between someone who is mentally challenged and a person who has a fu Manchu and is still rocking MC Hammer pants."
I have not. Selective quoting, on your part.
Originally posted by the About us pageThis is purely for entertainment purposes and strictly limited to the outrageously bad / ugly / creepy / crazy shoppers.
When a rich or middle class guy chooses to wear MC Hammer pants, that's one thing. When a guy is wearing MC Hammer pants he probably paid $1 for at Goodwill because that's what he can afford, it is another.
MC Hammer pants are cheaper than jeans. You don't get a lot of choice when you get free handouts.
If I was driving home from somewhere with a goat, are you suggesting that I must go home first before stopping at the store? Believe it or not, when you are making ends meet, you combine trips.
Originally posted by Guru ZimIf I was driving home from somewhere with a goat, are you suggesting that I must go home first before stopping at the store? Believe it or not, when you are making ends meet, you combine trips.
What, seriously? Are you serious?
All right...no mas.
As much as I enjoy your recent dwelling into a seemingly unending and BAFFLING escalation of assumptions of the worst and poorest in... practically everybody, you have GOT to stop pursuing this line of reasoning. Mostly because you're wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong - but ALSO because you're just going to end up whipping yourself into the very frenzy you've already told us you didn't want to be in in the *first* place - all the while not realising that you're TOTALLY WRONG.
The TIME story AND the "About Us..." page make clear the creators' intentions with their site, and they are not - NOT - what you're saying. It's not SELECTIVE quoting, it's QUOTING. Even your own selection, which you seem to think bolsters your line of reasoning, doesn't reinforce your position. "Bad/ugly/creepy/crazy" doesn't mean "poor/can't help their situation/surviving on the fruit grown on my property/are janitors in my building, and close personal friends" just because you have said a few dozen times that it does
No amount of stories about the hard knock life of everyone you seem to be in personal contact with isn't going to change the fact that it's an amusing website. That is, if you don't have a big stick up your ass.
How we have managed to get through EIGHT seasons of American Idol without you composing a lengthy diatribe about how cruel the producers are to those people who can't sing by airing their "auditions" during the early episodes must be something of a minor miracle. Speaking of which, stay away from Kim's blog during Idol, for your little head may surely EXPLODE!
Quite a few of these people are wearing so many random items of crap sewn on or have attached so many things to their cars that they clearing spent MORE money to stand out. I mean, I'm getting by on casual labor right now and I WISH I had the cash to spare where I could afford to glue a bunch of skulls and garbage items to my car. lol
Originally posted by CRZHow we have managed to get through EIGHT seasons of American Idol without you composing a lengthy diatribe about how cruel the producers are to those people who can't sing by airing their "auditions" during the early episodes must be something of a minor miracle.
Uh. People who audition for American Idol self-select. They know there is a chance they will be put on TV and they know it may be for All the Wrong Reasons(tm). In fact, I'm sure they sign something to that effect before they ever get in front of the judges. And they stand in line for hours for the privilege of potentially making complete asses of themselves.
The people on the site in question do not self-select. It's clear not all of them have given permission to have their picture taken ("we are in no way liable if you get your ass beat by Bubba when he catches you taking his picture"). I would imagine even fewer have given permission for their photo to be posted on-line as an example of someone who is "[an] outrageously bad/ugly/creepy/crazy shopper[s]". Isn't taking and publishing a photo of someone without permission illegal in many places?
The site is clearly classist. They refer to the subjects as "Wal-creatures". Most people's response to classism is decidedly apathetic until class-based discrimination affects their particular class.
Anybody can be anything they want to be, but they best be prepared to be laughed at publicly for it, I guess. I think Guru had an elegant point about many of these people not having a choice, but maybe that's my bleeding-heart-liberal Canuck blood showing through.
I used to visit and enjoy sites like this frequently. Then I rememebered various experiences in my life where I have felt like someone who is in the pictures on that site must feel when they see themselves there. I'm not saying I'm any better than anyone else; sometimes I think classism is an innate problem with our species that probably will never go away. I'm just saying I try not to point when I snicker and that I hope that those who snicker at me don't either.
Originally posted by tarnish Isn't taking and publishing a photo of someone without permission illegal in many places?
If that were true, how could Tabloids stay in business? In the USA at least, the photographer hold the copyright on the photo. I'm fuzzy on nude shots of your loved one in private, but I'm sure they agreed to it if the pics wouldn't be released to anyone, so the subject has some rights there I think.
There is an expectation of privacy from cameras when you're in your house, or in a bathroom, for example. There isn't any when you venture out into public. The site even mention that they'll pull down your pic if you write to them.
If you’re not a fan of your picture, simply email us and we will take it down, no problem. If you like your photo but hate the caption or comment send us an email and we can remove it.
While some of the shots are candid, some are posed like with the lady with meter long fingernails. In this day and age, if you pose for a photo willingly, you have to accept the fact that it may end up online.
Originally posted by tarnish Uh. People who audition for American Idol self-select. They know there is a chance they will be put on TV and they know it may be for All the Wrong Reasons(tm). In fact, I'm sure they sign something to that effect before they ever get in front of the judges. And they stand in line for hours for the privilege of potentially making complete asses of themselves.
They also pass through two or three (if not more) non-televised auditions where producers tell them how great they sound - also during which they see a lot of people who can actually sing summarily dismissed. Maybe they should know better before they audition, but the crushing blow they receive on television is the result of having their egos stroked for the better half of the day only to discover they've been had.
Originally posted by tarnishPeople who audition for American Idol self-select. They know there is a chance they will be put on TV and they know it may be for All the Wrong Reasons(tm). In fact, I'm sure they sign something to that effect before they ever get in front of the judges. And they stand in line for hours for the privilege of potentially making complete asses of themselves.
You may be right, but there are some people who seem to be not all mentally there and seem to actually think they do sing great. And like Leroy said, it doesn't help that the shows producers reinforce that idea in their heads.
The best part of waking up is not Folgers in your cup, but knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.
This has been an interesting thread, with both Zims making some points. I'm leaning toward the "it's just meant for fun" side. I shop at Wal-Mart very frequently (does that make me one of the "people of Wal-Mart"?) and if I saw someone dressed all crazy or carrying a Macaw, I would nudge my friend and say, "Hey, check that out". This is the same thing, only on the internet. You see strange things everywhere- Wal-Mart just happens to be the common theme here for this particular site.
If I saw a car with toys and stuffed animals glued to it, I would probably stop and take a picture, whether it was at Wal-Mart or the parking lot of a country club or a Starbucks or wherever.
There's no way to know without asking the guy wearing MC Hammer pants whether he's wearing them because that's all he can afford or if he has millions in the bank and just happens to like wearing MC Hammer pants and tends to be eccentric.