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The W - Pro Wrestling - iMPACT! 8-20-09 "Blueprint for Disaster"
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Karlos the Jackal
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Since: 2.1.02
From: The City of Subdued Excitement

Since last post: 3011 days
Last activity: 1966 days
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.00
Our hosts tonight are Mike Tenay and...TAZ?!? Yes, Don West has been promoted and is now in charge of "merchandise development and sales initiatives," so Taz is our new color commentator.

(I'm of two minds here. On the one hand, I feel like the color guy is best when it's an ex-wrestler (with one or two exceptions). On the other hand, Don West has been pretty great these last few months and it's a shame to see him go. Honestly, I find Mike Tenay way more annoying, sycophantic, and grating these days. I wonder what a West/Taz team would've been like...?)

Anyway, the Main Even Mafia is out. Taz seems to have cleanly broken from them -- he does not play the heel at all during the show, instead doing his genial goombah shtick. The MEM are almost immediately interrupted by Matt Morgan (carrying an axe handle), who thought he and Kurt Angle had a deal that, at Hard Justice, one of them would pin Sting and keep the belt with the Mafia. Angle correctly points out that it all worked out -- he's got the belt, right? So what if he pinned Morgan to keep it?

Upshot is, Angle offers Morgan a chance to get in good with the MEM by teaming up with him to take on Team 3D in a tables match. Morgan agrees -- but does he have an ulterior motive?

The British Invasion vs. Beer Money: Non-title street fight. Kiyoshi, Abdul Bashir, and Rob Terry are all sent to the back; Tenay tells us that this is new TNA policy, that the refs have more power now and can do this sort of thing. We'll see how long that lasts. Pretty good garbage match that includes the usual (plus Brutus Magnus trying to suffocate Robert Roode with a plastic grocery store bag -- somehow that seems like a really dumb thing to put on TV [worse than hitting someone with a garbage can? I dunno, it just seems more...likely to be emulated?]).

James Storm is tied by his neck to the ringpost but is cut free by a ref. He smashes what looks like a wooden cutting board over Doug Williams' head, and then kills both guys with BIG garbage can shots. Williams is gushing blood and gets a beer bottle smashed in his face, then Beer Money hits the DWI on Magnus onto a garbage can for the win. Storm was just tearing them apart there at the end.

Lauren is with the Beautiful People -- Angelina Love has a teddy bear on her lap and is petting it like she's Ernst Stavro Blofeld. They confirm that they've turfed Madison Rayne from the group.

Mick Foley and Jeremy Borash are hangin' backstage when ODB and Cody Deaner show up, arguing about who gets the Knockout Belt -- Deaner wants to be "King of the Knockouts." Foley says he'll think about it and make a decision next week. Feh. Abyss shows up next and Foley gives him a sleeveless flannel shirt. Wow, Abyss is Mankind 2.0 (I mean, yeah, he always was but now even more so). Perhaps this will somehow lead to a Foley/Abyss feud, which is about the only Foley match I can think of that I'd have any interest in (and even that is minimal). I really wish Abyss would stop clapping like Eugene.

Madison Rayne vs. Angelina Love: Love ambuscades Rayne during Rayne's entrance, slamming her into the ringsteps and kicking the crap out of her. Love rolls Rayne into the ring and pins her.

After the match, Velvet Sky comes down and they give Rayne the Brown Bag Treatment. Christy Hemme and Tara make the save, although this doesn't stop The Beautiful People from attacking Rayne AGAIN backstage. I thought Rayne was at her best as a third-wheel afterthought, so I'm dubious about a face turn.

The Motor City Machine Guns have an INFOMERCIAL where they offer to hang out with you -- YOU -- for the LOW LOW PRICE of $2,000 an hour. They'll play video games with you, toss a frisbee around -- Shelley says, "I saw District 9, but I'll see it again." Amusing, but where can it possibly lead? TNA really wants to keep the MCMG on TV, but can't figure out what to do with them. C'mon, the feud with Kiyoshi and Bashir is right there and it would be pretty good!

Homicide vs. Samoa Joe: This is Homicide's rematch for the X Division title. During Joe's entrance, Taz says, "remind me to get my towel back." Taz says he brought Joe to this level, but Joe is on his own now. Nice little match -- I feel like it's on par with their PPV match, but I had higher expectations then, so don't hold me to that. Joe wins with the Muscle Buster.

Lauren is in back with Christy Hemme, Tara, Sarita, and Taylor Wilde. They announce that these are two (out of eight!) teams that will be competing in a tournament for the new KNOCKOUT TAG TEAM TITLES. Wow! They're all giving each other high-fives and like that.

Awesome Kong vs. Traci Brooks vs. Christy Hemme vs. Sarita: Each person comes out with their partner for the upcoming tournament: Kong with Raisha Saeed, Brooks with Sharmell (yeesh), Hemme with Tara (random!), and Sarita with Wilde (randomer!). Fun enough match, although kind of scattered and the commercial in the middle doesn't help. Hemme hits the FFG on Brooks but gets caught in Kong's Implant Buster. Kong slams and splashes Sarita, and then goes up top for the Awesomesplash -- but Brooks pins Sarita in the meantime. Kong is ANGRY and throws chairs while the other KOs retreat up the ramp.

Okay, so eight teams for the tournament? We know four of them, and the Beautiful People is another, obviously. ODB could team up with Rayne -- that'd make sense. That leaves Alissa Flash, Sojo Bolt, Daffney, and I guess Ayako Hamada? Huh, I guess they do have enough Knockouts to do this, although there's a lot of "thrown together" teams there (and Sharmell is a stretch). (Rhaka Khan is still listed on the roster page, but, you know.)

This throws a wrench into the "all belts are held by the MEM" assumption, unless Brooks and Sharmell win the KO Tag belts and the KO singles belt is won by...Jenna Morasca. Oh man, that's not going to happen, right?

Consequences Creed vs. "The Pope" D'Angelo Dinero: Jay Lethal is sent to the back while SoCal Val pulls Dinero's jacket off of him. There's some kind of "once you go black..." angle just waiting there. Good match -- Creed manages a couple of punch-based flurries, but is ultimately outclassed -- he's a tag guy who's "out of his element," after all.

Elijah hits some nice moves, including the Chocolate Mousse. He does a handstand on the turnbuckle, twisting into an elbow drop, and then pulls down his kneepads and finishes Creed with charging double knees to the back -- what used to be the "Elijah Express." It seems to have no name now -- I suggest the "Benediction."

After the match, the lights go down and Suicide appears -- and The Pope bails.

Matt Morgan is with Lauren in the back and talks about how awesome Kurt Angle is, and how he never lies, and how they're going to be great partners. The sarcasm flies right over Lauren's head.

AJ Styles comes out and announces that he's leaving wrestling. (I hate these kind of angles!) He says it's not worth it, he's missing his kids growing up, he's taking the frustrations of work out on them. Sting comes out -- t-shirt, no make-up -- and tells AJ that he's "the chosen one," the one that Sting wanted to pass the torch to. Styles can't quit, because then he's a QUITTER and a LOSER to boot. Styles and Sting hug and then go to the back. Huh. I'm not sure whether Sting talked Styles out of it or not (but I was expecting Styles to turn on Sting).

Bobby Lashley is out to join the announce team for the Main Event. They announce that DIXIE CARTER will be on Impact for the first time, next week, to talk about Lashley. Is anything but talk EVER going to happen with Lashley?

Matt Morgan & Kurt Angle vs. Team 3D: Kurt Angle slaps Bobby Lashley on his way out and the two are separated by security. This match seems kind of random, doesn't it? Standard stuff from these guys, nothing too exciting. After a commercial break tables come into play. One is leaning in the corner and Morgan Carbon Footprints his boot through it when he misses Devon -- he wasn't "put" through it, so it doesn't count.

They do a few spots where someone almost goes through a table but their partner moves the table at the last moment. The third one almost goes very wrong -- 3D suplexes Morgan and Angle is a little slow to move the table -- Morgan hits the end of it, busting the legs, but the table itself doesn't break, so that was close.

Kurt Angle looks under the ring for another table but there aren't any there. Backstage guys run out with another one and Ray tosses it in the ring. Morgan and Angle lay Devon out on the table and argue about who should go up the turnbuckles. Morgan does, reluctantly; Ray clubs Angle and Team 3D tosses Morgan off the top and through the table.

Angle retreats up the ramp, apologetically, while Morgan rails at him from inside the ring.

Good show. Very little MEM presence and not much in the way of wacky skits probably helped, as well as some strong matches.

--K

(edited by Karlos the Jackal on 21.8.09 0315)

Last 5 movies seen: The Hurt Locker **** - I Love You, Man ***1/2 - Watchmen **1/2 - The Great Buck Howard *** - Coraline ***1/2
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Matt Tracker
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Since: 8.5.03
From: North Carolina

Since last post: 121 days
Last activity: 6 days
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.18
Seems like a waste of the big Taz/Joe push.



"To be the man, you gotta beat demands." -- The Lovely Mrs. Tracker
lotjx
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Since: 5.9.08

Since last post: 1681 days
Last activity: 1520 days
#3 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.32
TNA feels like a waste since they started this MEM storyline. They are now in NWO lost in the wilderness territory. They need to get the belt off of Kurt and end this thing at least by Bound for Glory. Morgan is not the answer to stop Kurt and it fells like a place holder feud. The show needs a change of pace, because its not Raw bad yet, but I know a few people who are giving up on the product.
Lexus
Andouille








Since: 2.1.02
From: Stafford, VA

Since last post: 1462 days
Last activity: 208 days
#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.44
I might be in the minority here, but Angle can bring it on the stick and in the ring with good consistency (personal life aside), and really seems to me to be a modern day Ric Flair. The MEM reminds me more of the old Horsemen than the nWo, and it isn't like they're hotshotting the belt to Steiner, Booker, or Nash by having Angle lose the strap so they can regain it. Also, you gotta build somebody up before you take the belt off Angle; Sting and Styles would just be a little stale and Morgan doesn't have the 'it' spark (as yet).

In terms of comparisons to the WWE, I won't touch it; I'm too much of a TNA mark these days to be rational.

Joe was better before he started ripping off Umaga's look. Still the same skills, he just looks like a knockoff now.

Foley/Abyss has potential through the roof to be one of the most brutal spectacles in quite some time.



"Laugh and the world laughs with you. Frown and the world laughs at you."
-Me.
emma
Cherries > Peaches








Since: 1.8.02
From: Phoenix-ish

Since last post: 445 days
Last activity: 167 days
#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.39
    Originally posted by Meeeeee!
    Now, if we end up with Tazz replacing Don West on TNA, that's something I could get into...
(from last March) (The W)
Yea, me!! I never call that sort of thing correctly!! :-)
DJ FrostyFreeze
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Since: 2.1.02
From: Hawthorne, CA

Since last post: 137 days
Last activity: 137 days
#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.45
Read it and weep, fella


So no stripping Angle of the belt? No "mentions" or signs of reprocussions from Angle's run-in with the law last weekend? Has the whole thing blown over already?



CLICK OR DIE
InVerse
Boudin blanc








Since: 26.8.02

Since last post: 2046 days
Last activity: 2009 days
#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.44
Has there been any mentions of a wrestler's legal troubles on any show since the whole Ken Patera/Bobby Heenan angle back in the '90s?
DJ FrostyFreeze
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Since: 2.1.02
From: Hawthorne, CA

Since last post: 137 days
Last activity: 137 days
#8 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.45
Read it and weep, fella


    Originally posted by InVerse
    Has there been any mentions of a wrestler's legal troubles on any show since the whole Ken Patera/Bobby Heenan angle back in the '90s?
Of course not. That's why I put "mentions" in quotes.



CLICK OR DIE
Karlos the Jackal
Lap cheong








Since: 2.1.02
From: The City of Subdued Excitement

Since last post: 3011 days
Last activity: 1966 days
#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 8.00
    Originally posted by DJ FrostyFreeze
    So no stripping Angle of the belt? No "mentions" or signs of reprocussions from Angle's run-in with the law last weekend? Has the whole thing blown over already?
I read on a message board that, according to Meltzer in the WO Newsletter -- and this is second or third hand, now, so maybe someone else can confirm -- Rhaka Khan is considered by people backstage to be totally out-there bug-nut crazy. So that, plus I assume the standard "boy's club" of pro wrestling, means that TNA management is taking Kurt Angle's version of the story at face value and going from there.

Time will tell, I guess, how that pans out for them.

--K



Last 5 movies seen: The Hurt Locker **** - I Love You, Man ***1/2 - Watchmen **1/2 - The Great Buck Howard *** - Coraline ***1/2
kentish
Andouille








Since: 19.8.05
From: My Old Kentucky Home

Since last post: 3414 days
Last activity: 1425 days
#10 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.81
    Originally posted by InVerse
    Has there been any mentions of a wrestler's legal troubles on any show since the whole Ken Patera/Bobby Heenan angle back in the '90s?

Vader getting arrested for beating up that guy on Kuwait television?




"I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ."

-- Mahatma Gandhi
hansen9j
Andouille








Since: 7.11.02
From: Riderville, SK

Since last post: 115 days
Last activity: 115 days
#11 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.73
    Originally posted by Karlos the Jackal
      Originally posted by DJ FrostyFreeze
      So no stripping Angle of the belt? No "mentions" or signs of reprocussions from Angle's run-in with the law last weekend? Has the whole thing blown over already?
    I read on a message board that, according to Meltzer in the WO Newsletter -- and this is second or third hand, now, so maybe someone else can confirm -- Rhaka Khan is considered by people backstage to be totally out-there bug-nut crazy. So that, plus I assume the standard "boy's club" of pro wrestling, means that TNA management is taking Kurt Angle's version of the story at face value and going from there.

    Time will tell, I guess, how that pans out for them.

    --K


Yeah, listening to Dave & Bryan, they're definitely sounding a lot different now than they did when it broke. It's sounding like there's a distinct possibility that Angle is largely innocent, but he's blown all credibility so you can't be sure.

Money quote in the WON:
    Originally posted by Dave
    One comment on her this past week is that as crazy as some people are in the company, if you add up all the craziness of everyone else, she, by herself, beats that. That’s probably why the company was willing to take Angle’s side on the stalking charges, and disregard the police report that under normal circumstances showed someone who seemed to be way out there.


And I recall him making a similar statement about her craziness long prior to this breaking (probably around when it came out that they were dating).



It is the policy of the documentary crew to remain true observers and not interfere with its subjects.

Let's Go Riders! (4-3)
redsoxnation
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Since: 24.7.02

Since last post: 3923 days
Last activity: 3923 days
#12 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.74
    Originally posted by kentish
      Originally posted by InVerse
      Has there been any mentions of a wrestler's legal troubles on any show since the whole Ken Patera/Bobby Heenan angle back in the '90s?

    Vader getting arrested for beating up that guy on Kuwait television?





Flair's road rage incident a few years back that Edge mocked.
Alex
Lap cheong








Since: 24.2.02

Since last post: 326 days
Last activity: 34 days
#13 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.21
Santino's DUI! RVD's world title reign going "up in smoke"! Triple H ripping off the Smoking Gun to tell us why Booker T and other people like him didn't deserve to be world champion!
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