Originally posted by OliverBooking Cena vs. Orton at Summerslam? Geez, why don't they show us something we haven't seen a zillion times already?
Michael Cole: "Cena vs. Orton at Summerslam! Can you believe it?!"
No one pretends that every show he broadcasts is the first time he's ever watched wrestling like Michael Cole. He must practice by pretending to be surprised the sun comes up every morning.
That said ... holy CRAP was Lawler bad announcing the match all by himself. Horrible, horrible, horrible.
Originally posted by OliverBooking Cena vs. Orton at Summerslam? Geez, why don't they show us something we haven't seen a zillion times already?
Michael Cole: "Cena vs. Orton at Summerslam! Can you believe it?!"
No one pretends that every show he broadcasts is the first time he's ever watched wrestling like Michael Cole. He must practice by pretending to be surprised the sun comes up every morning.
That said ... holy CRAP was Lawler bad announcing the match all by himself. Horrible, horrible, horrible.
Made even worse by Lawler resorting to Cole-isms. "Mickie James is ROLLING!!"
Originally posted by redsoxnationOnly way a DQ could occur there would be for Dibiase using his head to hit Hunter's fist.
Thank you!!!
Originally posted by CerberusCall me silly, but since Evan Bourne beat Jack Swagger in under four minutes, why wouldn't he get the shot at Randy Orton at Summerslam?
Beat the Clock Challenge. For one of these 5 guys for the title match at SS. I groaned. With 2 top-tier guys & 3 midcarders. Against 4 other guys who are midcarders, plus a returning never-was. There's the whole implication that the opponents are pond scum jobbers. Of course they'll lose -- it's just a matter of how long it takes the Challenge Participant to do it. If they'd thrown all 10 competitors into a drawing for match-ups -- replace Masters with Primo or even DiBiase -- then you could do some interesting booking, & not tacitly put down half your midcard.
• As Jericho struts down to the ring, Shaq and Lawler look confused, as though they had no idea Chris Jericho would be coming down the ring at this exact moment. Shaq sells disbelief pretty well. After all, he’s been doing it to refs for 15 years.
- Chris Jericho, who at this point of his career has a “I am way, way too smart to still be a professional wrestler, but I’m just going to roll with it,” thing going, comes out in a blazer and starts telling Shaq that Shaq should respect him. Shaq responds by calling Jericho “Christina.” Max money, the Cavs are paying.
- To my surprise, Shaq actually won’t be wrestling tonight. Instead, Jericho and Big Show are going to fight “Crime Time,” who seem to be a WWE version of street thugs, which is exactly as embarassing as you’d think it would be.
• Uh-oh, the WWE Divas. A six Diva tag team match, no less! Gail Kim, Kelly Kelly and Mickie James skip to the ring. Kelly is wearing a Caron Butler jersey. I think Gilbert Arenas just died a little inside.
• The play by play announcer is Michael Cole. Jim Ross craps bigger than this guy.
• OK, match number four of the five timed matches. This one pits Jack Swagger against Evan Bourne, whom the crowd seems pretty fired up about. I’ve never heard of Jack Swagger, but he looks like a cross between Biff from “Back To The Future” and Bradley Cooper. He also seems to be missing his neck.
• After a commercial break, John Cena comes out to face off against The Miz, the guy who used to be on “The Real World: Back To New York.” Seriously, this is the best Shaq could come up with? Who scheduled this, Danny Ferry?
Kevin Kelly: "Mr. Austin, would you like to comment on Wade Keller's Take that endorsing the XFL hurts your anti-authority character?"
Steve Austin: "Oh shit, he actually said that? I thought the boys in the back were ribbing me!"
Kelly: "No, he really said that. Did they tell you the part about you sitting in the stands, looking all skeptical?"
Austin: "AHAHAHAHAHAHA. Yeah... oh man that was too much."
Originally posted by redsoxnationOnly way a DQ could occur there would be for Dibiase using his head to hit Hunter's fist.
Thank you!!!
Originally posted by CerberusCall me silly, but since Evan Bourne beat Jack Swagger in under four minutes, why wouldn't he get the shot at Randy Orton at Summerslam?
Beat the Clock Challenge. For one of these 5 guys for the title match at SS. I groaned. With 2 top-tier guys & 3 midcarders. Against 4 other guys who are midcarders, plus a returning never-was. There's the whole implication that the opponents are pond scum jobbers. Of course they'll lose -- it's just a matter of how long it takes the Challenge Participant to do it. If they'd thrown all 10 competitors into a drawing for match-ups -- replace Masters with Primo or even DiBiase -- then you could do some interesting booking, & not tacitly put down half your midcard.
Yeah, I thought the same in the Beat the Clock stuff. Didn't they do one of them before an Elimination Chamber or something to determine who the last man in was going to be, and have it that if any man lost, whomever defeated them would take their spot? If only Evan Bourne was a heel, he could use this slight for months as part of a bitch session! I almost would have liked to switch The Miz and Bourne so The Miz could have used that logic in his rants.
Originally posted by redsoxnationHow would Hunter have been DQ'd if he hit Dibiase? Only way a DQ could occur there would be for Dibiase using his head to hit Hunter's fist.
I thought the point was to get Hunter to waste precious seconds beating on Ted rather than finishing off Cody, myself.
I have no logical explanation as to why Hunter thinks you can kill a dog by cutting of it's tail tho.
Originally posted by John OrquiolaNo one pretends that every show he broadcasts is the first time he's ever watched wrestling like Michael Cole. He must practice by pretending to be surprised the sun comes up every morning.
Tony Schiavone would like a word...
"So listen up boy, or pornography starring your mother will be the second worst thing that happens to you today."