Everybody's singing three songs tonight! Everybody's visiting their home towns! Hopefully somebody shows up to Syesha's pep rally, or she'll end up sad and alone like poor Melinda Doolittle.
Ryan's got his serious face on tonight, which should let you know that everything is serious. He's also got a wicked five o'clock shadow that makes it look like he hasn't slept in a week. This...Is American Idol!
David Archuleta Singing: "And So It Goes" by Billy Joel (courtesy of Paula), "With You" by Chris Brown, and "Longer" by Dan Fogelberg (courtesy of Nigel Lythgoe) Home Town Visit: David is flanked by his creepy dad and Mayor McCheese, which is pretty awesome. It's like he's still having his birthday at McDonald's every year. Except we all know that birthdays are for winners, don't we, David? Performance: And So It Goes: Weird song choice, but I guess we'll see how it goes. It's always fun to play the "Let's see if we can guess what the producers think of the contestants based on what judge is assigned to them" game. This year, Paula's "safe" pick is Wheezy. Big shocker there. I honestly thought Simon would've tackled this mountain. Typically boring performance, so he didn't exactly come out swinging. With You: What, no Sean Kingston? Might've been a better choice, actually. David apparently sings this song to himself all the time, which is...sad. There's some fun awkwardness with Ryan about where he's supposed to be standing, which just allows me to note that David's been raiding Blake Lewis' "golf caddie" pants drawer. REALLY awful and awkward at the start when he's calling out for his "boo." Dorky white guys should not be singing this. Actually pretty good through the home stretch though. Longer: Simon immediatelly calls out Lythgoe for picking shitty songs this week which is pretty fantastic. I do love it when they fight. David's in his pleather pants again, despirately grabbing for that Chris Hansen vote. One of his better performances to date because he doesn't go overboard with it, but it's still more "Taylor Hicks" than anything else. Judges Say: You played it too safe, but that should be good enough for now. I Say: Without Daddy's pressure, he had one of his best weeks so far. Change: +2 Score: +1
Syesha Mercado Singing: "If I Ain't Got You" by Alicia Keys (Courtesy of Randy), "Fever" by Peggy Lee, "Hit Me Up" by Gia Farrell (Courtesy of Nigel Lythgoe) Home Town Visit: Syesha apprently spends the entire time locked in a limo reading text messages that she can't decipher from Randy Jackson. Performance: If I Ain't Got You: Syesha's still looking pretty good, y'all. Syesha gets the Randy Jackson "Silly Song Choice" award this season, when he bets that she'll sing Alicia Keys well because they're both *black*! There's a random Justin Guarini cameo in the crowd during this song that really distracts me for some reason. It's not bad, but it's not great either, which is exactly what Randy Jackson will give you. Fever: Syesha with a prop chair! See, this is the problem, she's putting out great performances right now, but the problem is that she's basically openly admitting that she'd rather be on Fame than Idol. Way theatrical, but pretty sexy. Everybody pretty much falls all over themselves to hate on it, but she's way better than Archie tonight. Hit Me Up: A song from "Surf's Up?" Is that really the best they could come up with? Seriously though, she actually handles this one like a pro. She could probably have one of those lower eschelon Beyonce careers if she really wanted one (she doesn't). Booty popping! Simon can't get over the fact that this song was from Surf's Up! Justin Guarini again! Poofy Hair Twins Unite! Judges Say: Even Paula knows the writing's on the wall here. I Say: She's getting to go out on a high note, anyway. Change: +3 Score: +5
David Lee Cook Singing: "The First Time I Ever Saw Your Face" by Roberta Flack (Courtesy of Simon), "Dare You To Move" by Switchfoot, and "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" by Aerosmith (Courtesy of Nigel Lythgoe) Home Town Visit: David would rather check his texts than be on some crappy morning news show. Seriously, were the mayors of Tampa and Kansas City *that* busy? Performance: The First Time I Ever Saw Your Face: I love that even Ryan is like, "Huh?!" at this song choice. Hey, Simon gets to play the odds in this one, and he likes to make the favorites sing whatever the hell he feels like hearing. David starts off in a really weird place, but kind of gets things going by the end. He's almost there and then it's over. Dare You To Move: There's a whole weird thing with him and a flower in his guitar commemorating the honor of Jason Castro or something. Again, he starts out really slow, but kicks into gear towards the end of the song. Paula makes a good point (what?!) about the fact that, as hard as it is to cut these songs, maybe you should do more than just sing through the chorus at this stage in the game. I Don't Want To Miss A Thing: Weird cutaways to David's mom every ten seconds. The judges just want to fellatiate Diane Warren a whole lot because she's sitting right behind them. I'd love to know who put sominex in Cook's Coffe this morning because, once again, he starts off like he's half asleep, then around the one minute mark he kicks into gear. Wait...Does Papa Archuletta still have access to the contestant's coffee? Because that would explain EVERYTHING. Judges Say: Not your best night ever, but it's not like it really matters. I Say: You're safe, of course, but try singing the WHOLE song next week. Change: +/- 0 Score: +4
If there were any justice in the world, Syesha would find a way to sneak in alongside David Cook in the finals, but there isn't. She'll go on to do Broadway or community theatre or whatever anyway, so no shocker there. Archuletta pulled off a couple of his better performances of the year, but he's still miles behind the other two in terms of marketabilty and personality.
Eliminated:
Syesha Mercado. Of course. Neither Cook nor Archuletta were anything special, and while last year's ouster of Melinda proves that the semi-final is not a good week for the charismaless "best singer" to rest on his/her laurels, it won't matter for young Archie. So we speed headlong into the most predictable finale in Idol history. I can only hope that Mayor McCheese shows up to make things more interesting.
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Did anyone catch the slip of Randy telling Syesha that it's great that she's peaking now, and that's why she's standing there at number 3? This was after her first song of the night. At least try to pretend that she has a chance of making the top two.
Another weird moment was when Randy was criticizing Archie for the awkwardness of saying lines like My Boo in With You, I swore I heard Archie muttering, "Yeah... I know... because I'm a white guy..."
The producers are so out of tune of what the contestants should be singing.
Is it me or does Ryan really love gay jokes?
For the performances themselves, DC had the best song w/ If I Ever Saw Your Face. DA was a runner up. Syesha is not good enough to be top two even though she's improved in recent weeks.
Originally posted by komarkazeIs it me or does Ryan really love gay?
Fixed.
God, what a frustrating show. Cook and Syesha were clearly the best performers of the night, but the judges can't stop fawning all over the kid that just gasps and moves his right hand up and down. That's all he does. Well, that and making modern songs sound like mellow elevator music (mellovator?). Randy's (somewhat disturbing) love for Archie is grating on my nerves.
Originally posted by Excalibur05E Hit Me Up: A song from "Surf's Up?" Is that really the best they could come up with? Seriously though, she actually handles this one like a pro. She could probably have one of those lower eschelon Beyonce careers if she really wanted one (she doesn't). Booty popping! Simon can't get over the fact that this song was from Surf's Up!
Dude. Dood. It's from "Happy Feet." Not "Surf's Up." Different penguin movies!
PS - I only know this because I have three kids and "Hit Me Up" is one of the tap numbers for my daughter's recital and I think I have heard it 5,473 times already. Syesha butchered the crap out of it, but it did make me look up Gia Farrell and she doesn't look anything like I expected (and she's only 19).
Oh, Syesha is so gone. I think it was already pre-ordained for Creepy Little to win anyway, with Creepy Medium coming in second.
Watching last night all I could think was that they are desperate for the creepy little bastard to make the final so his audience of 11 year old girls who don't know better stay watching, but that they really don't want him to win. Simon Cowell cannot be happy at the thought of trying to market the Mormon Michael Bolton to a contemporary audience. I guess they could try to go for some sort of Josh Groban thing with him if need be, but this guy has bigger bomb than Ruben Studdard written all over him. David Cook, while not amazing, can surely be counted on for a competent album with a few hits on it.
I do have to argue with the idea Syesha was sexy during "Fever" as that was the most antiseptic performance I've seen this side of one of those morning news segments breathlessly promoting a pole dancing aerobics class. She was sexier doing the damn penguin song because it didn't feel so horribly forced. She's not sultry, and she can't play sultry. "Fever" is a dirty, filthy song. The only people who could have pulled off "Fever" this year are Amanda (it would have sucked, but it would have had the proper layer of grime and willing to get fucked in a bar bathroom vibe about it) or Danny Noriega.
FWIW David Cook has led on Dialidol.com's predictions 4 of the last 5 weeks. The only other week was the week of 5 when Syesha inexplicably had the lead. I'm hoping that bodes well, though I fear the creepy little bastard might not get let out of the basement for a year if he loses.
My favorite thing about the whole night was Simon's mouth agape reaction to Fantasia's performance which was something akin to "What the hell is this shit?"
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Fantasia's performance showed us what Syesha was aiming for: choreography, audience focus, and energy -- all three things the two guys veer away from. Syesha made the effort to be an all-around performer and had more vocal variety to offer. I hope she dances on the graves of the other guys' careers.
I like Cook, but his formula is stale. He needs to start a song with the energy he reserves for the choruses. Archuletta, to his credit, tried something new with the Chris Brown song, but everything he sings, he turns into "Desperado." These two guys are damned dull. The power ballads are killing me.
I'm not sure the security can handle the outraged riot if Cook wins.
"To be the man, you gotta beat demands." -- The Lovely Mrs. Tracker
Originally posted by Matt TrackerFantasia's performance showed us what Syesha was aiming for: choreography, audience focus, and energy -- all three things the two guys veer away from. Syesha made the effort to be an all-around performer and had more vocal variety to offer. I hope she dances on the graves of the other guys' careers.
I like Cook, but his formula is stale. He needs to start a song with the energy he reserves for the choruses. Archuletta, to his credit, tried something new with the Chris Brown song, but everything he sings, he turns into "Desperado." These two guys are damned dull. The power ballads are killing me.
I'm not sure the security can handle the outraged riot if Cook wins.
I don't know if you have listened to any of the full length studio performances they do each week, but I find Cook does that less when he has the full song to work with than when he is forced by the format to pretty much work to one crescendo. Sadly when you truncate songs to 1:30 you end up turning it into just some meaningless verses and the big chorus to make people remember it.
I didn't watch it, I wasn't gonna watch it, I won't miss it, but any show that only lasts two weeks probably deserves a thread for all of us to know that it should be made fun of. Also, because I was unaware of a Jennifer Weiner connection (mediabistro....