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The W - Pro Wrestling - Perry Saturn Doesn't Exist...
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Oliver
Scrapple








Since: 20.6.02

Since last post: 3314 days
Last activity: 3308 days
#1 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.36
There's an article in the latest edition of Raw Magazine, where Dean Malenko talks of the success he's shared with Chris Benoit and Eddy Guerrero after jumping ship from WCW to the then-WWF, and how proud he is of Benoit and Guerrero for winning the titles on their respective programs.

Of course, there's absolutely NOT mention of Perry Saturn. In a paragraph dedicated to their last day in WCW, they mentioned Chris and Eddy walking to ask for their release, Dean joining them...but no Perry.

Perry's not even included in the group shot of the Radicalz' first appearance on Raw after leaving WCW.

Now, I know that the WWE likes to forget, edit, and alter facts when they recount history...but to basically forget someone who was a member of one of the biggest mutinies in pro wrestling? I mean, sure...Saturn's accomplishments were minimal, at best...but at least acknowledging that he was a part of WWF and blindly joined them after leaving WCW...that would have at least been a classy thing to do.

Alas, another way that WWE confuses me.



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JoshMann
Andouille








Since: 17.11.03
From: Tallahassee, FL

Since last post: 5736 days
Last activity: 5733 days
#2 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.95
Does that mean that Moppy never existed, either? :)



That's right, I said it- I said the J-Word
friedmind
Medisterpoelse








Since: 16.7.04

Since last post: 7176 days
Last activity: 5913 days
#3 Posted on
However, They do mention Perry Saturn along with Dean and Eddie in Chris Benoit Spotlight Bio on wwe.com.

http://spotlight.wwe.com/benoit/bio/story1.html
TheGreekPhysique
Bauerwurst








Since: 13.2.04
From: Brooklyn, NY

Since last post: 6499 days
Last activity: 5925 days
#4 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.03
Perry Saturn does exist... I saw him eating with a woman at Katz Deli in East NY about a month ago. Now if he were somehow erased from the time continuim since that time by Vince McMahon, well, then that would suck.

Dear lord, what if Vince could control time, and could go back and forth and erase people and things from history... oh wait, he does that now, doesn't he?
Matt Tracker
Scrapple








Since: 8.5.03
From: North Carolina

Since last post: 121 days
Last activity: 6 days
#5 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.96
Man, no love for a European and Hardcore champ.

Harsh. Whoa. Dude. And all that.

I think it's a shame to ignore him. What could he have done to warrant the snub? He may not have had a storied WWE career, but ... wait, didn't he hurt someone in the ring? I'm half remembering that he did. Could that be the explanation?



"To be the man, you gotta beat demands." -- The Lovely Mrs. Tracker
StaggerLee
Scrapple








Since: 3.10.02
From: Right side of the tracks

Since last post: 937 days
Last activity: 937 days
#6 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.31
Well, wasnt he a US champ in WCW? Or am I on crack? He was one of the most talented IN RING guys, he just couldnt cut a promo to save his life, with that lazy eye and garbled speech.

THANK YOU however will live as one of the better gimmicks ever, for my own entertainment purposes of course.

And if hurting somebody in the ring gets you erased from WWF/E history, how does Dvon manage 187 Tag Title wins by himself?



Thank you for your irrelevant opinion.

Doe, Ray, Me, Fa, So, La, TITO SANTANA!
Snookum
Kishke








Since: 19.6.03
From: Louisville

Since last post: 6082 days
Last activity: 6063 days
#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 7.03
It's a shame he's not still around and in that gimmick for Eugene to run into.

Give me Eugene, the brain-damanged Saturn, and Mankind in the same room and RAW would pretty much write itself right there.

Seriously, I thought that was a great gimmick for Saturn, and I loved Mopey, but it did pretty much say, "okay, where do you go from here?"

I did get Dean's and Perry's autograph once at a show. After Dean signed, I thanked him. He was halfway through saying "You're Welcome!" when he suddenly lost his voice and muttered to himself. :-)

Matt Tracker
Scrapple








Since: 8.5.03
From: North Carolina

Since last post: 121 days
Last activity: 6 days
#8 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.96
    Originally posted by Snookum
    He was halfway through saying "You're Welcome!" when he suddenly lost his voice and muttered to himself.
Maybe he realized he just lost a "you're welcome" match.



"To be the man, you gotta beat demands." -- The Lovely Mrs. Tracker
RoadWarrior24
Linguica








Since: 21.10.03

Since last post: 7166 days
Last activity: 7159 days
#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 0.48
    Originally posted by Matt Tracker
      Originally posted by Snookum
      He was halfway through saying "You're Welcome!" when he suddenly lost his voice and muttered to himself.
    Maybe he realized he just lost a "you're welcome" match.


does anyone remember some of the crazy off the wall things Saturn would say before he would say "You're Welcome" ?
Gugs
Bierwurst








Since: 9.7.02
From: Sleep (That's where I'm a viking)

Since last post: 3962 days
Last activity: 3090 days
#10 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.49
    Originally posted by RoadWarrior24
      Originally posted by Matt Tracker
        Originally posted by Snookum
        He was halfway through saying "You're Welcome!" when he suddenly lost his voice and muttered to himself.
      Maybe he realized he just lost a "you're welcome" match.


    does anyone remember some of the crazy off the wall things Saturn would say before he would say "You're Welcome" ?


Bunnies eat radishes so they can make babies.

You're welcome.



Mark Bellhorn needs to be dragged into the straight and made to watch the bullet as it passes through his eye socket. Repeatedly.

Vote Kerry.
Phantom
Frankfurter








Since: 17.3.02

Since last post: 5819 days
Last activity: 5795 days
#11 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.18
    Originally posted by Matt Tracker
    Man, no love for a European and Hardcore champ.

    Harsh. Whoa. Dude. And all that.

    I think it's a shame to ignore him. What could he have done to warrant the snub? He may not have had a storied WWE career, but ... wait, didn't he hurt someone in the ring? I'm half remembering that he did. Could that be the explanation?
As I heard it, he got super-pissed off during a match and damn near killed a local jobber. Supposedly his punishment was the match with the APA, where he was nailed with the super-stiff double-powerbomb and given the Moppy gimmick afterwards.
oldschoolhero
Knackwurst








Since: 2.1.02
From: nWo Country

Since last post: 5431 days
Last activity: 5365 days
#12 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.64
"I think it's a shame to ignore him. What could he have done to warrant the snub? He may not have had a storied WWE career, but ... wait, didn't he hurt someone in the ring? I'm half remembering that he did. Could that be the explanation?"

He beat the ever-lovin' snot out of regular jobber Mike Bell for not getting up high enough on a powerslam spot. That in turn led to the "you're welcome" gimmick as punishment, then him being fired when that wore off and they realised he sucked.

Anyhoo, simple logic behind Saturn not being mentioned: Benoit and Eddie are now main-eventing, and Dean's telling the story. The entire thrust of it is "look at the Radicals' amazing success! (afterfouryearsoffumbles)", so what's the point of clouding the issue by bringing up the black sheep of the group? They're not supposed to be writing an intricate expose of the contract deals here.



Once upon a time in China, some believe, around the year one double-ought three, head priest of the White Lotus Clan, Pai Mei was walking down the road, contemplating whatever it is that a man of Pai Mei's infinite power contemplates - which is another way of saying "who knows" - when a Shaolin monk appeared, traveling in the opposite direction. As the monk and the priest crossed paths, Pai Mei, in a practically unfathomable display of generosity, gave the monk the slightest of nods. The nod was not returned. Now was it the intention of the Shaolin monk to insult Pai Mei or did he just fail to see the generous social gesture? The motives of the monk remain unknown. What is known, are the consequences. The next morning Pai Mei appeared at the Shaolin Temple and demanded of the Temple's head abbot that he offer Pai Mei his neck to repay the insult. The Abbot at first tried to console Pai Mei, only to find Pai Mei was inconsolable. So began the massacre of the Shaolin Temple and all 60 of the monks inside at the fists of the White Lotus. And so began the legend of Pai Mei's five point palm exploding heart technique.
MARTYEWR
Kishke








Since: 15.10.02

Since last post: 3736 days
Last activity: 3736 days
#13 Posted on | Instant Rating: 10.00


On top of that, he's also mentioned in the Monday Night War DVD when they talk about Benoit & Friends jumping ship.



Martin Kipp: Creative Member, Extreme Warfare Revenge

W Of The Day: Tuesday, March 4, 2003
W Of The Day (2): Wednesday, October 29, 2003

"Because I'm the man, and the man's the man, and that's just the way it is!" -- Eric Foreman, That 70s Show

Matt Tracker
Scrapple








Since: 8.5.03
From: North Carolina

Since last post: 121 days
Last activity: 6 days
#14 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.96
    Originally posted by oldschoolhero
    The entire thrust of it is "look at the Radicals' amazing success! (afterfouryearsoffumbles)", so what's the point of clouding the issue by bringing up the black sheep of the group? They're not supposed to be writing an intricate expose of the contract deals here.


It's a matter of style in packaging the theme. I think it shows an immediate contrast of Chris and Eddy's success if they talk up their belt victories compared to Dean's career and especially to Saturn's career.

Four guys, one group: two world champs, one road agent, one mop molester.



"To be the man, you gotta beat demands." -- The Lovely Mrs. Tracker
The Vile1
Lap cheong








Since: 4.9.02
From: California

Since last post: 5456 days
Last activity: 5188 days
#15 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.83
Perry Saturn held the WCW tag team and television titles during his stay there. Don't think he ever held the US title or anything else.




"Don't compare my arm to your cheap arm!"
-Edward Elric
KaneRobot
Morcilla








Since: 24.2.02
From: Bowels

Since last post: 5869 days
Last activity: 5161 days
#16 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.62
    Originally posted by RoadWarrior24
      Originally posted by Matt Tracker
        Originally posted by Snookum
        He was halfway through saying "You're Welcome!" when he suddenly lost his voice and muttered to himself.
      Maybe he realized he just lost a "you're welcome" match.


    does anyone remember some of the crazy off the wall things Saturn would say before he would say "You're Welcome" ?



My undisputed favorite Saturn moment during that little run was during the invasion...Heyman found Saturn sitting in the back and gave this impassioned speech about getting all of ECW back together. This is NOT verbatim, but it went something like this:

Heyman: Perry, Perry...hi, how are you? ::sits down next to him:: Now Perry, listen. You know that we're getting ECW back together. And you know how much I value each and every one of my employees. Well, we've got almost everyone back together but we are still missing one important piece: that's you, Perry Saturn. ECW wants Perry Saturn to come home, because it's not the same ECW without Perry Saturn. Come on, it'll be just like old times and we'd love to have you back. (goes on and on)...what do you say?

Saturn (pausing for a moment, then nodding head up and down like George Steele): Snausages!

Heyman: ...snausages...snausages. ::walks away blankly::

Saturn: You're Welcome!



dwaters
Bierwurst








Since: 16.10.02
From: Connecticut

Since last post: 1400 days
Last activity: 1379 days
#17 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.19



Bunnies eat radishes so they can make babies.

You're welcome.


That line is STILL funny to me.
I think Euguene needs to say that line once, as a tribute to Perry.
RoadWarrior24
Linguica








Since: 21.10.03

Since last post: 7166 days
Last activity: 7159 days
#18 Posted on | Instant Rating: 0.48
didnt he have a bunch of awesome ones when he was in WCW? are there any websites with them
AssDroid!
Pinkelwurst








Since: 6.1.03
From: The Jersey Shore

Since last post: 7183 days
Last activity: 7180 days
#19 Posted on | Instant Rating: 3.00
Checking Click Here (wrestling-titles.com), Perry Saturn was indeed WCW Tag Team Champion (with Raven (won from Rey Misterio and Billy Kidman and Chris Benoit and Dean Malenko in a three-way match on 5/9/99 and lost to Diamond Dallas Page, Bam Bam Bigelow, and Kanyon (the Jersey Triad) on 5/31/99) and Chris Benoit (won from DDP and Bam Bam Bigelow on 6/10/99 and lost to the Jersey Triad on 6/13/99)) and World Television Champion (won from Disco Inferno on 11/3/97 and lost to Disco Inferno on 12/8/97). He was, however, *never* United States Champion.

You're welcome.



Meatwad: The Giants are number one.
Carl: That isn't a prediction there Meatman... that's a fact of life!
Eddie Famous
Andouille








Since: 11.12.01
From: Catlin IL

Since last post: 2620 days
Last activity: 2161 days
#20 Posted on | Instant Rating: 6.46

    Originally posted by oldschoolhero
    He beat the ever-lovin' snot out of regular jobber Mike Bell for not getting up high enough on a powerslam spot. That in turn led to the "you're welcome" gimmick as punishment, then him being fired when that wore off and they realised he sucked.


Wasn't the story here that Bell was shooting, telling Saturn he didn't want to lose in front of his friends?




"In the sky. Lord, in the sky..."
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I would back Morrison, Kofi, MVP and Yoshi. The problem with the last three is their handicap in Vince's eyes and sometimes the less then stellar WWE fans.
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