I'm bored, and I'm starting to hate the life I lead. I'm 32, no girlfriend, no prospects for a girlfriend, stuck in a go-nowhere job in a city I don't really want to be in. I have no ties here in Calgary and could easily just up and leave.
Has anyone here ever completely "changed" their life? Has anyone gotten to the point where they're just so frustrated with how they have ended they made some sort of drastic change?
I have done that a few times. Once for the worse, unfortunately. Frankly, I could probably stand to do it again.
Change is good. If you have the means, go for it. If nothing else, get out and visit some new places to see if you find something better. Better to experience than just wonder what could have been.
I recommend Oklahoma. There's all kinds of starry-eyed country chicks here who would date you, and the cost of living is next-to-nothing. The pace is really laid-back.
But no, I've never drastically changed my life, except for the time I got fired from Taco Bell and became a journalist two days later, so maybe I'm not the guy you should listen to!
"Also, don't incur the wrath of P.U. It can only lead to trouble." - Torchslasher
Originally posted by BullittI'm bored, and I'm starting to hate the life I lead. I'm 32, no girlfriend, no prospects for a girlfriend, stuck in a go-nowhere job in a city I don't really want to be in. I have no ties here in Calgary and could easily just up and leave.
Has anyone here ever completely "changed" their life? Has anyone gotten to the point where they're just so frustrated with how they have ended they made some sort of drastic change?
Nine years ago, I changed from a technical front liner and supervisor to a teacher and moved about 400 miles away (from Chicago to Louisville). It was mostly about job frustration, but also about middle-age crazy as well (I was 35 at the time).
Now 25 years ago, I quit the job I had wanted to do since I was like 10 (a cop) and moved from San Francisco back to Chicago to no serious prospects (but it worked out). It wasn't turning out like I hoped. (plus there was a girl in Chicago....)
Change is good. I expect to do it again in the next 10-15 years, as I start some sort of later-life activity (job or something - I am not going to play shuffleboard somewhere)
Just as a sidenote, all uses of the word "you" are in the cosmic sense, natch.
One thing I've learned...sometimes you just have to not think about doing things too much (which is one of my personal weaknesses) and just DO them, consequences be damned. You can psyche yourself out of going to the driveway to get the mail, much less doing something life-altering. So it's not always the worst thing in the world to shake yourself out of routines.
That's the impulsive person response...to the more structured type, it may be a good idea to make a list of what objectives you'd like to accomplish and all possibilities in how to do them. If that means having to move, having to go back to school or having to hit the treadmill for 45 minutes a day, figure out what the best solution will be and stick to it...and keep in mind that if you do that, that you're working towards a long-term objective...especially if we're talking about re-education or exercise.
But also remember that just because things are how they are one day doesn't mean it'll be the same tomorrow...even though it means going out and making an effort to do so, throwing around resumes may end up getting you something you didn't know you could get...going out more may means you end up having a Meet Cute (tm Roger Ebert) where you least expect it...
...and holding onto that point for a second, I've always discovered that I always end up falling into relationships at times when I'm not looking for anything. That's me, though. Also, that's when you know you have something and not necessarily because you feel you NEED to have something.
But as my grandmother would say, find what it is that makes you happy, no matter what it is.
OK, that was really new-agey for how I normally am. I feel dirty now.
Originally posted by BullittI'm bored, and I'm starting to hate the life I lead. I'm 32, no girlfriend, no prospects for a girlfriend, stuck in a go-nowhere job in a city I don't really want to be in. I have no ties here in Calgary and could easily just up and leave.
I just went back and checked the time you posted this last night. It coincided pretty much with the time we were emailing each other about the Bruins utter dismantling of the Senators.
But seriously, I was in your exact same position when I was 33 years old. I was living by myself in Waterville, Maine with no real ties in the city. I had been divorced about 2 years and spent most of my time working, playing softball or volleyball and not much else. I had pretty much given up pursuing any other love interest until I met someone playing co-ed softball. I was not looking for a date at all, much less a serious relationship. Well, one thing led to another and she's been Mrs. Pieman for 9 years.
So, Jamie, sometimes things just happen when you least expect them, when you're not looking for something. So, keep your chin up, young feller.
I sort of went through a similiar situation recently. I had to make some serious changes, moving hundreds of miles was one of them, letting go of someone I've loved for all my life it seems was another. I still can't tell you if I'm happier here with this new life but I know I'm moving in the direction I need to go to get there.
Basically, and I've learned this the hard way, no one is going to make you happy but YOU. There's no way around that. If you feel like you're in a no win situation, get out. There's always an alternative. Change isn't always good but at least it's different. You grow and evolve into a better person the more you experience and learn about yourself. It just takes SO much courage to take that first step out into the unknown.
Sooner or later, you'll make up your mind and either accept your life the way it is or do something to shake things up. I would definitely recommend the latter.
Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come. Matt Groening (1954 - ), "Life in Hell"
Originally posted by piemanI just went back and checked the time you posted this last night. It coincided pretty much with the time we were emailing each other about the Bruins utter dismantling of the Senators.
You're REALLY enjoying this, aren't ya?
Hey, thanks for the good thoughts, kids. My lack of Green Card would make the suggested move to Oklahoma rather difficult.
Do you lift weights? Bodybuilding is VERY rewarding. Get in the gym 3 times a week and start getting big. Subscribe to Muscle and Fitness to get ideas to model your workouts. Physical activity helps your mind and body.
It's like Triple H said(in this Month's M&F Issue), "The discipline of bodybuilding makes you goal-oriented, and it helps you focus on what you want to achieve in life." Couldn't agree more.
And to all the HHHaters out there, Hunter discusses his weight gain over the past year that you all mock. He says he was at his leanest during WMXIX at 250 and he wanted to get heavier again. He said he won't go over 265. What most people don't understand is that to get really big, you need to put on some fat with your muscle. Then you cut the fat away. That is why bodybuilders have On-Season and Off-Season weights. They can control their weight like they have "gain" and "lose" buttons. How many of YOU can do that?
Anyway, sorry about the rant. Seriously dude, get in the gym, I think it can relieve depression better than some meds. It makes you not only feel better about yourself, but all the endorphins and crap make you feel satisfied.
Give it a try.
"Huard, gonna go back to throw the ball. Sets up, looks, throws towards the corner of the endzone...it is INTERCEPTED INTERCEPTED, THE DUCKS HAVE THE BALL! Down to the 35, the 40. Kenny Wheaton's gonna score! Kenny Wheaton is gonna score! 20, the 10, Touchdown! Kenny Wheaton on the interception, the most incredible finish to the football game!"