I can only think of one way that the inevitable return of Nash won't be a disaster:
Commissioner Kevin Nash.
Give him a mic and let him try to be funny -- it's about all he brings to the table. It's a role he can play where he can be on TV and be a part of the storylines without having to actually attempt to wrestle.
If you look very, very closely, you can see Edward R. Murrow.
The problem with a commisioner is, we already have two owners competing for power. Granted, that's never stopped the WWF before, but I would like them to TRY and keep the # of people in power to a minimum.
Sure Nash is cool and all, but what about Razor Ramon? I'd love to see that guy pull his act together and get back in the WWF.
"I hear it's amazing when the gamouse purple stuffed worm in flap-jaw space with the tuning fork does a raw blink on Hara-kiri Rock. I need scissors! 61!" -Colonel Campbell, Metal Gear Solid 2
To quote Stone Cold, What? No room for dead weight, what? Explain the Undertaker to me. Hell, even more egregious, explain Billy Gunn to me then. Nash will survive because he's giant, has a lot of mark-enticing charisma, and knows how to play the backstage game. He'll suck in the ring most likely, he'll do really dumb interviews, and probably have written in his contract a squash of Jericho or RVD within his first 3 months just on general principles.
The Undertaker is talented, is a name that the fans recognize, and puts on an entertaining show. Ever since he became Crazy Old Man he's become even better showing off his LARGE MOVESET. His submission stuff is really neat, and it shows that even in what's probably gonna be considered the twilight of his career, he's not afraid to learn and try new moves.
Billy Gunn's bad rap comes from his singles career. Working the tag ranks though, he's not nearly as bad as you make him out to be. He's been around long enough and knows the ropes. I am dreading the gay gimmick they've put on Gunn and Palumbo, because I really think they CAN be a pure tag-team without it, but that has nothing to do with the topic at hand and I'll save it for another rant.
Kevin Nash will be interesting to watch. If he goes out there, bores crowds to death, you can bet Vince will probably let him out the door quickly. That or use him to get other guys over. However, I'll say what I said when Kronik came in - give him a chance to show you his stuff. If he flubs it up, I'll be the first to admit it was a silly move. But you can't pre-judge UNTIL it comes to pass.
Who knows, Kevin Nash could very well surprise all of us with a new outlook on the sport and come out of the gate looking like the Big Sexy of 94-95...
Who knows, Kevin Nash could very well surprise all of us with a new outlook on the sport and come out of the gate looking like the Big Sexy of 94-95...
The mark inside me wants Nash to appear his first night back and tell Vince "Mission Accomplished" and then both of them have a good, hearty "evil laugh."
That'd send everyone into a tizzy, wouldn't it?
Jason Baldwin Head Writer, 4-Color Review And the guy behind PAPER CUTS! Every Thursday, only at 4-Color Review http://4colorreview.com
I'm with the Commisioner Nash idea. Let him be the mouthpiece for Vince's WWF when the split happens. That serves two purposes: 1. Nash doesn't have to wrestle 2. NO VINCE!!
Otherwise, I'm willing to give Nash another chance. He claims that he wants to go out on a good note, so I would take that to mean that he would give some effort. We'll see though, as it is, he's claiming on his website that the WWF hasn't even sent him a contract yet, so....
You know what Nash brings to the table? Female viewers. White trash south side female viewers. The kind of women who pick their men based on the vintage of the Monte Carlo they drive.
Which is also why Undertaker is still around and the major online columnists don't get why he can squash everybody and still be so over. It's because chicks dig that. I know women who will not watch Smackdown because they read Taker (or Kane or Bradshaw for that matter) jobbed or got beat up. They can't handle it. And what do they all have in common? They can't WAIT for the return of Nash.
You're kidding me, that many people want NASH back? He's one of the major reasons why I stopped watching WCW alltogether back in 1999. I couldn't stand him as Diesel in WWF, I couldn't stand him when he was starting the nWo, and I couldn't stand him in his most recent incarnation (before he was off TV). I can't put my finger on it, I just don't why he draws so many people. (Aside: Then again, I still can't understand why The Mountie wasn't such a big draw. I mean, he's the Mountie! Whatever.)
...Some fear the Pink... ...But many fear....THE MOUNTIE! (He's handsome, he's brave, and he's strong, you know)
I emplore you and everybody else: Give him a chance. He's a long way from Diesel and WCW is long gone - a motivated Nash could do great things. If when he shows up on the 7th, wait until he has a couple of matches in The Fed. If he's still a lazy ass, well, you can come right back here and tell me what a goof I am.
1) Even a motivated Nash is a liability in the ring. He's certainly not the only devoid-of-ring-skills wrestler to ever grace the upper-card, but pushing him AT ALL makes match quality take an automatic hit.
If you put him in with people who can work, they'll have to perform heroic acts of carrying to put on a decent show. If you put him in with (say) the Taker or the Big Show, you may have a debacle of Biblical proportions on your hands.
2) What possible motivation could Nash have at this point?
He's sat on his ass for a year collecting a paycheck for watching TV. He's openly contemptuous of the idea that there's anything wrong with him as a wrestler, or that anyone who isn't 6'6"+ and beefy should be pushed. His track record over the last few years of WCW was abysmal. And he's now being brought in as The Next Big Angle To Revitalize The WWF as-is, without doing a single thing that would demonstrate that he's changed one bit since his last WCW appearance. He was a load in WCW, and Vince is coming to him now and saying "We need a big load in the WWF. Here, have lots of money."
Putting him in the uppercard (which they will; could you possibly conceive that Nash would return without a guaranteed major push?) is like turning over your city's mayoral office to Marion Barry. Giving people second^H^H^H^H^H^Hthird^H^H^H^H^Hninth chances is a nice thought, but sometimes the track record simply speaks for itself.
If you look very, very closely, you can see Edward R. Murrow.
I think I will always be a Nash fan. If he turns in a sucky performance, all I have to do is close my eyes and picture him jack-knifing Eric Bischoff through the entrance ramp. Hoohaw! I can't picture Big Bossman and Big Show or any other of the worthless lugs doing similar, mark-out feats.
I think I have an idea for Big Kev's return. He comes back and is hanging around backstage when Kane walks by. He calls him over and tells Kane how much he likes his work. "You're a seven foot tall guy who wears black and red, what's not to like?" But he's concerned that it's been so long since Kane was WWF Champion, and offers to take the big man under his wing. He offers the benefit of all his experience in both the WWF and WCW to help him out. Kane considers this until Nash says these fateful works.
"Think about it Kane. You could be the next Diesel!"
Within five minutes of his return to the WWF, Kevin Nash is brutally murdered by Kane.
I haven't seen anyone mention it yet, but it seems like a rather obvious option to me. Nash is some sort of surprise entry in the Rumble and just thrashes everyone like the old days. He doesn't have to win, but it sounds like an obvious way to bring him back IMHO.
I'm just beggin ya though Kev, PLEASE quit calling yourself "Big Sexy"! Put on the old Disel garb and call yourself Big Daddy Cool if you must, but there is NOTHING sexy about a forty year old, seven foot tall man with grey hair and a beer belly!
I agree the Big Sexy tag has got to go. I don't know what it is with Nash. There seems to be a market for a guy in his mid forties, that wears baggy pants and dresses 'street'. Kevin Nash is a goof. He's good for a couple of laughs, but he's never as funny as he is with Hall. He tries to act 'street', but needs a guy like Konnan or X-Pac to give him some kind of credibility.
I say give him X-Pac and give him Credible. I have no idea who he is gonna feud with though. He sure drags down the work rate quota for main eventers. Then again I'd be just as happy to see him stink the joint up and end up like Bagwell and Kronik.
I personally know three fairly attractive women who would disagree with you. All are acquaintences or girlfriends of people I have met - but they all were Nash fans.
Not wrestling fans. Nash fans.
I dunno. Maybe they don't care if he can wrestler or not. Nash fans count for just as much on the Nielsen ratings as wrestling fans do. Can he bring enough Nielsen points to bring him back? That's what market research is for.
I personally know three fairly attractive women who would disagree with you. All are acquaintences or girlfriends of people I have met - but they all were Nash fans.
Not wrestling fans. Nash fans.
Many women are secretly lesbians. If they can fawn over something with girl hair that alledgedly has a penis, they don't feel so bad about it.
Of course, my Mom always liked him. As (I guess) payback for hauling me to house shows as a kid, I always had to put up with her talking about which guys had cute butts. Luger mostly.
I think I will always be a Nash fan. If he turns in a sucky performance, all I have to do is close my eyes and picture him jack-knifing Eric Bischoff through the entrance ramp. Hoohaw! I can't picture Big Bossman and Big Show or any other of the worthless lugs doing similar, mark-out feats.
Are you saying that the Bossman dragging the Big Show's daddy's coffin around behind his car was not a mark-out moment you'll remember all your life?! What's wrong with you!
Personally I like Nash's interviews better than The Rock's tired lines that he uses over and over again. AND even though Nash isn't that great of a wrestler, I don't think he is any worse than Big Show, Undertaker, and Kane, but IS better on the mic.
I don't mind the addition of Kevin Nash, it atleast gives us some new possibilities. Sure The Rock, Stone Cold, HHH are all huge but we can only watch them wrestle each other so many times. So it gives us some new feuds, Nash vs. RVD, Nash vs. Jericho, think about what kind of numbers a Nash vs. Stone Cold main event could bring in.
Like I say every year, I haven't bothered to vote in the Observees since 2005, but As a matter of fact he was #4. Are there even that many Japanese wrestlers on this list? The WON awards have actually become a lot more U.S.