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28.3.24 0727
The W - Pro Wrestling - Captions! (Episode #3)
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Kawshen
Liverwurst








Since: 2.1.02
From: Bronx, NY

Since last post: 5402 days
Last activity: 3662 days
#1 Posted on
If anyone can suggest a name better than "Caption Contest" - that'd be great. BrewGuy suggested "KawshenCaps" but I don't know about that one.

Well, Wienerboarders, here's the third with 5 pics. But first a word from a couple of sponsors:




Catch Kurt Angle's cameo appearance in LL Cool J's Patriot Remix of "Mama Said Knock You Out."




Sean O'Haire. He doesn't tell you anything you don't already know. Because quite frankly he scares the crap out of me.



OK, peoples. Here are your five screencaps. Give captions and enjoy.

1)



2)



3)



4)



5)




Enjoy. And remember - it's all about.... the Hand. ;)




Promote this thread!
Dagent913
Bockwurst








Since: 18.11.02
From: Strong Island

Since last post: 7116 days
Last activity: 6647 days
#2 Posted on
Well, here's my first try....

1.) Got yer nose!
2.) No, I got your nose!
3.) Girlfriend, you don't even WANNA know 'bout the day I had!!
4.) Sorry, Rob, the urinal was just too far away!
5.) EAST SIIIIDE!!!!!

EDIT: Y'know, these really aren't all that funny, are they. Sorry!


(edited by Dagent913 on 24.1.03 0002)

What if your grandfather was a kazoo?



You are Wolverine!


Take the "Which Marvel Comics Hero are you" quiz!


Excalibur05
Knackwurst








Since: 19.1.02
From: Minnesota

Since last post: 2915 days
Last activity: 2783 days
#3 Posted on






Test learns that Stacy isn't as ladylike as she would originally appear.


2)





Cole: And the WWE Audience grows with every passing day, Tazz.
Tazz: Don't turn around Cole. Don't turn around.


3)





Earl: When I'M the best worker in the match, you KNOW there's a problem.


4)





When Rob told Kane that he would see "the Big Red Machine" backstage, he wasn't quite prepared for what he recieved.



5)





Brock: Ok. Seriously...How do you do it? Two...legit...to...quit.






RAW Satire 1/20
Buffy 7.12 gets a 7.0 There was a lot of good stuff mixed in with some of that mediocre dialog.
RKMtwin
Boudin rouge








Since: 1.3.02
From: Denver, Colorado

Since last post: 5627 days
Last activity: 5070 days
#4 Posted on
1) "Onions... *sniff* irritate eyes... *sniff* and testicles..."


2)"Now watch in wonderment AND astonishment as my broadcast colleague Tazz will projectile vomit.. RIGHT ONTO THE CAMERA!"


3) "Naw, Hunter. I'M telling YOU that I'm more buff, cut, lean, mean, slim, trim, and sexier than the both of ya's!"


4) "Not quite like Mrs. Robinson, huh? Well... whatever."


5) "See, there are three things I know about caring for your colon... Hey! Just look at the shirt."



David Crockett sez it best, folks: "Look at 'im, Tony! Look at 'im!"
fuelinjected
Banger








Since: 12.10.02
From: Canada

Since last post: 6706 days
Last activity: 6706 days
#5 Posted on
1) Waaa, waaa, there goes my heat, waaaa.
2) Cole: Hey! Smell that! Tazz: I'm tapping out!
3) Earl: Even I don't want to watch this one.
HHH: You're right, let's get this over with.
Steiner: Duh, what talking you are about? Duh
4) RVD: Wow, this looks really really gay.
5) WORD LIFE HOMEYS! Off camera: "CUT! Sorry Brock, that's Cena's script."
JST
Toulouse








Since: 20.1.02
From: Quebec City, CAN

Since last post: 2237 days
Last activity: 703 days
#6 Posted on



Test seeing his one and only source of heat being carted off on a gurney.

2)



It's the new Smackdown highlight show, "WWE Rocket Busta", where Tazz finally has the chance to get some much needed rest! Meanwhile, Cole recaps the events that happened on Velocity...

3)



Hebner: "No no, tonight he's MY bitch!"

4)



RVD is in a hurry. While he stretches out for his big match, he tests out his new invention that will increase his kicking arsenal. The World's Largest Boots! Meanwhile, he also tries to figure out how he'll get off that big stain on the ceiling...

5)
Hi, my name's Brock, and I, uh ...God, I'm so nervous this is the first time I'm doing this. I'm a college graduate and a scholar. I like long walks on the beach, listening to music while reading a good book and I like women that aren't afraid to be themselves. All you ladies out there can contact me at 555-...



Swordsman Yen
Frankfurter








Since: 16.2.02
From: Shaolin

Since last post: 7381 days
Last activity: 7364 days
#7 Posted on | Instant Rating: 10.00
From the desk of Swordsman Yen
1)


"Geez, I was better off not knowing what 'Get down with the Brown' meant."


2)


Tazz makes the international hand-sign of "I need to get this boogie outta my nose, so focus on Cole over there instead" to the cameraman.


3)

"Yes, I'm sure this shirt would look nice on your bedroom floor, but I have to wear it while I'm on duty."


4)


RVD becomes an unwilling participant in a homoerotic rendition of the For Your Eyes Only movie poster.


5)


"I'm The Next Big Thing, yes, I'm the real Big Thing
All you other Next Big Thing's are just imitating
So wont the real Next Big Thing please stand up, please stand up, please stand up."





"I don't care what people think. People are stupid." -- Charles Barkley
Mr. Boffo
Scrapple








Since: 24.3.02
From: Oshkosh, WI

Since last post: 3895 days
Last activity: 3856 days
#8 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.44
1. Test-"I can't believe they made me cut my hair!"
2. Tazz-"If he doesn't shut up, I'm going to kill him."
3. Hebner-"*I* am the World Heavyweight champion."
4. RVD-"Hey, you aren't the dominatrix I ordered..."
5. Lesnar-"HA, scissors beats rock!"



Jackson
Sujuk








Since: 4.1.02

Since last post: 5434 days
Last activity: 4959 days
#9 Posted on | Instant Rating: 2.10


"Damn, I'll never get the hang of that sliding UNDER the bottom rope thing!"


2)


"Boy, I tell ya Tazz I get no respect. My wife and I made a pact that we would only smoke after sex. I haven't had a smoke in six months. She's up to three packs a day. No respect I tell ya."


3)

"OK here's the deal. I poke you in the chest like this and then you fall down for the 1,2,3. It's Earl's time baby!"


4)


The glass ceiling rule now states that RVD must at all times remain lower than HHH's sack.


5)


"The Nizzext Bizzig Thizzing is Hizzere to Brizzing the Pizzain. "






Bubbles? Oh come on Sharon! I’m Ozzy Osbourne the Prince of Fucking Darkness. Evil, evil, more fucking evil not a boatload of fucking bubbles man.
dMp
Knackwurst








Since: 4.1.02
From: The Hague, Netherlands (Europe)

Since last post: 265 days
Last activity: 13 hours
#10 Posted on
1.) Al..Wilson..Dead? Nooo..Why God WHY??

2.)Tazz: "Psst..Cole..your left hand! not down there..not now!"

3.)Hebner: "Ha! I tore my quad this morning and I am fine!"

4.) RVD: "Err...you want me to smoke WHAT?"

5.) And my favorite part of Full House was when Joey would go 'cut it out' and he did that Popeye chuckle.



drjayphd
Scrapple
Moderator








Since: 22.4.02
From: New Hampshire

Since last post: 766 days
Last activity: 350 days
ICQ:  
#11 Posted on
    Originally posted by Kawshen
    OK, peoples. Here are your five screencaps. Give captions and enjoy.


1)

After seeing the replay of the chairshot, Test makes a mental note to sign up for acting lessons.

2)

Cole tries to convince Tazz that just because three of his fingers are now just useless stumps, that's no reason to jump.

3)

Earl: Crap, I've gotta WATCH this match too? Can't they just ref their own match? I'm sure someone's thought of that before...

4)

Rob Van Dam ponders why exactly Kane has lifts in his boots.


5)


Wait... version one... how does this work again?

Thanks for playing, everyone, and the winning streak is now at three.

(edited by drjayphd on 24.1.03 0257)


Today's Out-Of-Context Quote, Courtesy of GRL:

"Actually, I consider Nowinski, Victoria, Trish, Hurricane, and Bischoff to be the carrots in my HHH enema."
HMD
Andouille








Since: 8.6.02
From: Canada

Since last post: 2541 days
Last activity: 2541 days
#12 Posted on



"A usually unemotional Andrew Martin is unexpectedly bombarded with memories of tear-jerker 'The Joy Luck Club' and breaks down into constipated tears."


2)


"Tazz gives the surprisingly well-endowed Michael Cole a handjob before tightly applying his shades to prevent any potential retinal sting the typically off-camera conclusion of this routine act results in."


3)

"I'm serious, man. If Steiner's wearing a thong I will personally pay you three hundred dollars---there's no way!"


4)


RVD resignedly thinks about standing up as he realizes someone has carelessly left a giant pair of boots in front of the camera.


5)


"Whatdaya mean for life? For life!?! They made money with this gimmick?"






"If there are no monkeys in the House of Commons, how come you never see a banana outside of it? I've been to Ottawa dozens of times, and I've never seen a banana anywhere near the Parliament buildings. Clearly, that's because there are monkeys inside."
Stephanie
Landjager








Since: 2.1.02
From: Madison, WI

Since last post: 614 days
Last activity: 54 days
#13 Posted on | Instant Rating: 5.22
1)


"My nose! I broke my widdle nose!"


2)


"If you don't come down here to fill up this place, I'm authorized to send Tazz to your house to kick your ass."


3)


"HHH - since you can win this title without a fight, I declare myself World Heavyweight Champion!"


4)


Noting that his dominatrix has just arrived, RVD gets in some last minute stretching.


5)


"Word To Your Mother!"

Steph



I'm going twenty-four hours a day...I can't seem to stop
- "Turn Up The Radio", Autograph
ekedolphin
Scrapple








Since: 12.1.02
From: Indianapolis, IN; now residing in Suffolk, VA

Since last post: 490 days
Last activity: 14 days
#14 Posted on | Instant Rating: 4.52
[Note: I intentionally didn't look at any other captions before making my own, so I apologize in advance if I use one that someone else has already used.]

1. “Damn, Stacey, you've got some serious GAS!”
2. WWE management refused to allow Tazz to wear a mask, so he settled for the next best thing.
3. HHH: “Your place, my place, or right here, Earl?”
4. “Mr. Van Dam, you're trying to seduce me.”
5. Secret Agent Brock Lesnar: licenced to kill



“Randy Savage is in, and he's nuts!”

--Tony Schiavone, WCW Bash at the Beach 1996

Two-Time, Two-Time Randomly Selected Wiener of the Day, 5/27/02 and 7/3/02

Certified RFMC Member-- Ask To See My Credentials!

Wpob
Bierwurst








Since: 21.11.02
From: Williston Park, NY

Since last post: 1454 days
Last activity: 1220 days
#15 Posted on
1. Stacy's hurt? Oh man, now I have to learn to wrestle!

2. (Tazz to himself) Cole is such a tool. I could choke him out right now and no one would care.

3. You thinkt he crowd in Montrwal hated me? Wait until they see these guys wrestle. Me? I'm outta here.

4. I know what you mean Kane. The glass ceiling is so low I have to get on the ground so as to not hit my head. But that's cool. Got a doobie?

5 Screw with me and I'll cut ya!



So I jump ship in Hong Kong and make my way over to Tibet, and I get on as a looper at a course over in the Himalayas. A looper, you know, a caddy, a looper, a jock. So, I tell them I'm a pro jock, and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama, himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald... striking. So, I'm on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one---big hitter, the Lama---long, into a ten-thousand foot crevasse, right at the base of this glacier. Do you know what the Lama says? Gunga galunga... gunga, gunga-galunga. So we finish the eighteenth and he's gonna stiff me. And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know." And he says, "Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consiousness." So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.
GRL
Frankfurter








Since: 13.7.02
From: Austin

Since last post: 1690 days
Last activity: 1527 days
#16 Posted on
1. There goes my heat.
2. (I can't think of one here.)
3. Now, I've been doing this a long time, and I've seen my share of bad matches, but I don't know who I pissed off to have to work THIS piece of crap.
4. Jesus, Kane, no wonder McMahon likes you! You're huge!
5. The only reason I'm doing this is because I messed up when I tried in the ring, you know!
Ticamo
Boerewors








Since: 19.7.02
From: Trenton, NJ, USA

Since last post: 6239 days
Last activity: 5537 days
#17 Posted on
1)

Test cries as memories of his feud with Davy Boy Smith and the Mean Street Posse come back to him, thinking of the last time his woman was wheeled away on a gurney.



2)

Tazz signs to Brock Lesnar "Send help-- Cole has a gun to my back." OR After some thought, Tazz finally comes up with a way to push his shades up, dig up his nose, pick his teeth, and pop that pesky zit on his chin all in one hand motion.



3)

"Hey HHH, remember our little arrangement? Well, you missed payment. So guess whose REALLY calling the shots now? That's right. Earl Q. Hebner."



4)

"Dude, that's not crabs. Just wash it off."



5)

Brock signs back to Tazz: "Two SWAT team guys are jumping from the section above you. Duck!" -OR- "Can you believe it? HHH said I have 3 more years until I'm up to his level!"



Bad..... but you can't beat the '2 legit 2 quit' caption. I loved it.
Jason K. H.
Haggis








Since: 16.7.02
From: Palma

Since last post: 7612 days
Last activity: 7534 days
#18 Posted on
1)

For your safety, Test demonstrates the wrong way to survive a chemical attack.



2)

"Ala Kazam! And if you'll turn around now Tazz, you'll see the entire crowd has disappeared!"



3)

"Would anyone care for an hors d'ourves before the match? I made them myself."



4)

Sometimes, Rob's flexibility amazes even himself.



5)

"Okay, so I start with 5 apples and then I eat 2 of them, so...dammit, I can't do this!"



The Thrill
Banger








Since: 16.4.02
From: Green Bay, WI

Since last post: 3633 days
Last activity: 232 days
#19 Posted on


    1)

    Visiting the set of "Helldorado," Test finally smells what The Rock is cooking.



    2)

    Unable to stand Cole's squawking any more, Tazz thinks of his aborted pushes one last time...and goes for the chloroform.



    3)

    "Dammit, Paul, it's MY TV tray, and no, you can't borrow it again for your damn Botox party!"



    4)

    *ZZZZIP*



    5)

    For the LAST TIME, Monica, you hold the cigar like *this...








Star wipe, and...we're out.
Thrillin' ain't easy.

.
.
THE THRILL
All-Star Championship Wrestling Home Video Technical Director...& A2NWO 4 Life!
The Evolution Continues!

The A2NWO presents ACW: ASSAULT ON ALGOMA!
Saturday, February 15, 2003 at Algoma, WI High School!

Parts Unknown
Lap cheong








Since: 2.1.02
From: Darkenwood

Since last post: 1763 days
Last activity: 1448 days
#20 Posted on
Okay. I just have to join in. These have been hilarious!



This is what it sounds like...when a dud cries.



2)

"And Tazz makes his return to the ring at No Way Out as THE PHENOM! THE DEAD MAN!"



3)

"Psst! Put this pad on your back so you will be unscathed by the impending 500 suplexes!"



4)

"Bring out The Gimp."



5)

"So I pull out my pistol and say, 'Now YOU, Poncho Villa! You PULL DOWN YOUR PANTZ!'"








Why Goldust rules the world



"Also, don't incur the wrath of P.U. It can only lead to trouble." - Torchslasher
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Agreed, it was sad. Cycling off roids is one thing, but he just looked fat and out of shape. Not even "puffy", to quote our wise friend Warrior. Regarding OJ, didn't he exchange wins with Pope earlier in the year too?
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